His hands were weak and shaking from carrying far too many books from the bookshop and all the emotions inside. It was the best feeling.
-Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Asher knows that I love to read, so it doesn't come as a shock when he decides to give me a book.

Not long after I started to read it did I realize at the end of each chapter the nice guy put a sticky note with one thing he loves about me on it.

Tsk.

Cheesiness.

Strangly this inspired me to finish the book even more, it was already late at night so that took me two days.

Getting to the end the book, after the last chapter, I'm about to close the book when I see the bright blue corner of the last sticky note.

Expecting another little loved thing, like my dimples or maybe just another cute note about our relationship not much exhilaration fills me, rather adoration of the golden boy. That is until I read four simple but rather sloppily, nervously written beautiful, adrenaline pumping, squeal worthy words.

"Will you marry me?"

"I'm nervous about doing this because once someone told me I couldn't do anything that involved love. But here goes nothing, and I didn't even know what to write." I manage to keep the relaxed grin on my face and open the book Asher had given me with shaky hands. "You don't know this but once on Valentine's day last year I sat down and started a song about someone who thought they couldn't be loved because I couldn't find any other way to express how I feel. Because as you've probably seen I suck at expressing how I feel. So, here goes nothing. Read them out loud."

Silently I hand it over to the golden boy, who's boyish smile lights up the room, despite the nervous undertone.

"To Asher, aka the golden boy, aka the nice guy who's mine." He begins to read the gold sticky notes I put on the start of every chapter instead of the end of them, glancing up in time to see me wink. "I told myself to write about something that I'm interested in, that other people would be interested in too. I instantly knew today when Link suggested to me in jest that I should do something romantic that I knew what I wanted to write about, or rather who. Because there is nothing more interesting to me than you."

His smile fades, but I think that's a good thing, as he looks up to me, emotions clouding his eyes. I motion to keep going, a smile overpowering my snarky grin with a bite of my lip.

He keeps flipping the pages. Thank god this is a long book.

"I could have chosen lots of things, what you mean to me or how much I like your smile, or sometimes how nervous you get when I'm around you because your blush is just so cute or how you're the most attractive person in the room." Like I predicted Asher flushes at this. "I could have picked something else to write about, leave it on forever unread because it just doesn't matter, but then I thought why not? And hell, my heart just isn't giving up right now at the thought of you, but getting stronger."

This time when he looks at me I barely notice it, a hand placed over my heart as I take in how it's racing. Apparently I didn't lie.

"For lots of high school, as you know, we had our home ed. class together. You were my partner and I had this massive crush, so I kept making stuff up to do as partners even though I didn't need any help because I thought that was my chance to get to know you better even if I didn't actually have a chance. That's insane..." Asher trails off in thought before he shakes himself out of it and starts reading again.

"I have to admit when we first became friends I would ask people about you, and the people who actually knew who you said that you were just the quiet nice guy, or the kid with the gold shoes. It was what I heard from pretty much everyone I asked, using pretty much the same words. Don't get me wrong you are pretty quiet and much too nice to be with someone as rude as I am but you are much more than some quiet nice guy. They all told me that's all you were but I knew from the moment we really started talking that you're more than that."

I can see just from his posture that he likes this, and is content with reading it.

"Given who I am I thought for a while that the more we talked the more you would probably want to not be friends but the opposite happened and somewhere along that line we began to love each other. Whenever we touched, or I got to call you mine or we woke up next to each other I felt like I was 6 and was told I could pick whatever candy I wanted. Then I really got to know you, and I found out small things about you that I liked. I was absolutely whipped for the first time in my life. My family found out and started asking about you, and I know it probably shocked you when you came over and they all knew who you were. Yeah Blue, it did."

I giggle at this, remembering how I didn't even tell him my name.

"I have a difficult life sometimes, it's not necessarily the worst life out of people I know but it is extremely stressful and sometimes I find myself wanting to sleep for days. As a raging insomniac I can say it sucks to have that craving when I can seem to do everything but sleep. And the hospital visits and nightmares -well, it can be hard to catch up. You know this."

Asher pauses to grab my hand, pressing a kiss on my palm. "You're worth it."

Ice floods me, and it's the most pleasant cold I've felt in my life.

"I knew I was screwed up, and I knew I didn't have to be. I don't think you're a screw up." He tells me, frowning slightly.

"I know."

"Okay...The more time I spend with you and Weasley- -more specifically you- -I find myself being actually able to sleep and I'm happier. I haven't had an all-nighter for a while and I used to have to stay up for two days straight, my 'high score' is 5 days without sleep. So I guess this is me saying thank you. You helped me, probably without much intention, that I'm not as bad of a person that I thought I was. I was just dealt some rough cards and handled it through anger, becoming numb or just ignoring it."

The thumb he uses on my jaw to make sure he can see my eyes is all I need to know, I'm never going to have to become numb again. I'm going to live through my feelings and survive.

Something a lot of the human race takes for granted.

"A quarter of my life I've been dangerously depressed or just right on edge and I suck at taking care of myself. For a long time, I didn't care what would happen to me, as long as those around me were okay but I realize that sometimes the best thing I can do for someone else is to take care of myself." Asher nods as he flips to the next page, looking like he couldn't agree more. "I got this far into this writing thing and I realized I'm trying to give you a whole other book, so sorry if your brain hurts after this. Even if it does you owe me a hug."

The nice guys looks up to me, a smile not on his lips but in his eyes. "A hug it is."

A chuckle escapes me, I ruffle his hair a bit. "Just keep reading."

"As we've established we're pretty close so when I heard about your family and what you've been through it made me sad. And mad. I know what you've been through does to a person, and how that changed someone. I don't like that you have that burden because it makes for a stressful life, I'm sorry that you know that stress. You always appear calm -even if I can tell you're not and it makes me smile, I hope you know you're amazing. I'm amazing?"

"Fuck yes you are." I reply, narrowing my eyes at his mint ones.

"Okay, okay." Asher laughs, looking back down at the blue writing.

"I guess this writing quest has turned into something else because it's not just about someone that I'm interested in anymore, it's not about someone that I'm falling for anymore and that scares me. It's about someone I fell hard for. It's undeniably past some silly little school girl crush anymore, it's us. I love you, you brought light into my previously pretty dark tunnel. The thought of us....I'm sitting here on the couch and I have this smile on my face and it just won't go away. We were on call, face-time to be exact, and you fell asleep because you were so tired after helping Link move the living room around. I'm listening to your music playing in the background and making sure you're okay. You are. When was this?" He asks, looking up to me.

"Like a week ago or something," I roll my eyes. "Pay attention and read."

Asher huffs, but does as I say.

"You're so goofy and funny, you care so much and you hate it when someone that you love gets hurt. I'm sorry I get hurt so much. You made me fall in love without trying and you give some of the best hugs I've ever had. If someone else was in my place, which I don't want to happen, I realize that they'd fall for someone with such a beautiful soul and Gold, it would be impossible not to. I'm not going to write sincerely, or dear, because that would make me feel like I'm drafting a formal email to a teacher so I'm just going to say: I love you with all my broken pieces, despite you preferring me whole."

I don't know why he looks down, but as soon as his head shakes a bit I can tell it's because he's trying to cover the fact that his eyes teared up. My arms are instantly wrapping around him. "Don't cry Gold, you're breaking my heart here. I hope you liked this...and that this passed any birthday goals."

"Liza this is amazing," The golden boy hugs me back, face pressing into my collarbones. "I can't thank you enough."

"You don't have to thank me at all. It comes with lemon sherbert and a kiss, you get to decide what comes first." I say, smirking slightly when I see mint green eyes instantly flick down to my lips.

It's good that while sitting down we're around the same height.

"The kiss." He decides. After giving him what he chose I pull away, a move he clearly wasn't predicting.

"Now," I giggle. "Read the last page."

The last page, with two sticky notes instead of one and five words instead of those simple four.

Mint green eyes widen, as Asher clearly forgot through everything I wrote what he had written to prompt this whole thing.

Scrambling to open and read the last word I wrote, deep voice breathy and awed, Asher only says:

"Yes."

And now, forever and always, my golden boy is mine, and I am his.

So not letting him off the hook this time.