◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

"The little bird thinks that she has no wings to fly when in reality, her fear made her think that way." - starkith

◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

⍋Primium impressionem (15.5/20): The cover fits so well with the aesthetics of your profile and the other books you wrote, I love the art style and looking at it I can feel in my bones that this book will be a turbulent ride! Still, I want to remind you that many people won't find your book through your profile which leaves them in the dark when it comes to what actually hides behind a simple picture of a girl with a lipstick in her hand.

Recommendations and reading lists from other accounts are the main sources to potential readers so you should exploit that as much as you can. This is a fanfiction about Namjoon, let him be in the spotlight! This amazingly unique title you have could be on the cover along with one of the beautiful quotes you put in your description. Don't be afraid to enchant the potential reader - show off what you have to offer!

The description is neat and clear, getting straight to the point and telling me the main things I should focus on while reading this book. Perhaps what could make this description even better is a bit of fine-tuning when it comes to what exactly to give away as well as the use of punctuation. By that, I mean something like this:

Neena's lost. Books seem to be her only solace, but even that interest seems to start to fade once her parents decide to split. A clumsy boy she meets, although far from making her life sunshine and daisies with his entry, Neena finds special because he can understand her when no one else does.

You don't have to tell me Neena has problems with her mother or has anxiety - you're giving a hint when you write that her parents split. It's an event that takes a toll on anyone and you have plenty of time to properly show it once I start reading. The use of dashes (-) can be amazing to bring suspense since while reading, we tend to take a mental breath at them before continuing. Though in your case with the description, they can easily be replaced by commas. All in all, it's a great base of spells you have there and these are just some extra suggestions to inspire you and make it even better!

⍋Et compages grammatica damnationem (16.5/20): I can safely say you mastered the craft of grammar since no obvious mistakes exist in your work and I'll praise you for as long as I'm alive because of it! There are mishaps here and there when you accidentally mix the present and past tense in a single sentence so make sure you're definite with one tense and stick with it throughout your book. It doesn't happen much, but brushing through the chapters and finding those tiny mistakes won't take a lot of time and will bring a much more professional feel to your story!

What could improve your already fine sentence structure is figuring out a way to utilise every word you write for your benefit. Using the same word to begin your sentence can become repetitive and bland so try and mix it up a little bit! Have fun with it, let your creativity shine through! Also, your tendency to string the same words through a single paragraph along with having different actions happen in one can be a bit confusing and sometimes make me reread just so I can catch up with everything that happened.

My advice to you is to break up these eventful paragraphs describing different actions so you avoid getting your readers' minds confused. I also have to confess something as well - I'm not a huge fan of seeing numbers when reading fiction since I'm weird and read 30 mins as it is and not thirty minutes as I'm supposed to. That's just a personal preference and a little pet peeve of mine so I didn't take points off for it!

⍋Scripto artes (18.5/20): When I read your book, it seems like I picked up one of Albert Camus' works and I must say I absolutely love that! It feels like I'm in a dream while reading, there's a cocoon of warmth lulling me into a calm state that allows me to experience every single scene you write! I love your short sentences in some instances, but overusing them can get a bit overwhelming to read so try and connect them more and only use the shorter ones when you want to make an impact.

What I mean by that is emphasising Neena's thoughts by writing them as a single paragraph. I'm getting shivers from only thinking about it! For example, when she forgets her umbrella or is thinking about how it was a good thing she had her sweater on. Accentuate those sentences with physical separation, bring attention to them and make a bombastic pause with them! It will bring spice into your already wonderful potion of emotions!

⍋Influunt (7/10): In general, you sail through the scenes quite well and I do like the flow of your chapters. The length of the chapters suits your writing style and there's a sense of serenity in the transitions, but they can sometimes be harsh and abrupt as I mentioned before when I talked about having to reread some parts. Pronouncing spells definitely is one of the harder jobs to do so I can't blame you for still exploring your style!

One scene that sticks with me, in particular, is at the beginning of the fourth chapter. The sentence You couldn't focus on reading any of the books comes like a clap of thunder, snapping me out of the prior description before flowing into the calm portraying of Neena's feelings. It makes me ask myself - what just happened? - which is something I'm sure you didn't want to achieve. A little spell that will help you is separating that sentence from others or finding a better way to lead into it.

⍋Insidias (15.5/20): I think you already know what I'll say when it comes to the plot. It's a bit generic and slightly rushed, so I won't dwell on that too much. What I'd love to see is consistency when it comes to the writing style throughout the plot. Your descriptions are expertly done and I'm so sad that I get to see them less and less as I progress through the chapters. Dialogue, although very important, can't tell the story by itself. You knew where you wanted to lead me through the plot and it seems like you were a bit afraid to take me there completely. What made my heart squeeze and tears collect in the corner of my eyes is how you brought everything together in the end.

Please show me more! I want to see more of Neena's growth, her acceptance of the situation she is in, show me the struggle she had when it comes to her being a book lover, don't only mention it here and there just to remind me it exists! I'm begging to get to know her (and not only her). This story is too good to be left here, it has so much potential to grow into something even grander so please, go out there and write it! The talent you possess will help you do it, I'm telling you that without a single doubt!

⍋Characteribus (20/20): The characters are my favourite component of your story! I love them so much and I'm gushing over all of them, no matter if they are leading or supporting characters! They are realistic to the bone, perfect with their imperfections, different views and just - UGH! So damn good! Thank you for making them flawed - THIS IS SO IMPORTANT! I'm glad you weren't afraid to let them be human, make mistakes and be so damn relatable.

I love how even though they might have seemed a bit 'already seen' at the beginning, Neena and Namjoon managed to show me that they can grow with each other's help. The way you wrote them was so delicately thought out and is the component that makes this story what it is - which is a masterpiece and we all know it. The nicknames moonchild and lost soul just spoke to me on a different level while I was reading. Also, I love the mother's growth as well and would love to see the sister incorporated a bit more - I think she's having a couple of aces up her sleeve.

⍋Totalis puncta et summaries: 93/110! Ni, you did an amazing job with this story! Well freaking done, I love it and highly recommend it for others to read! Rainbows After Storms is an experience full of poetic feelings, hidden meanings and wonderful talent! This is a story you should read while wrapped in a blanket with a cup of hot cocoa in your hands.

I hope that at least something inspired you from this review since that's the whole point of it. I love your work and I hope you'll continue to get better with every word you write to be able to achieve your dreams! There's also this dread in the pit of my stomach telling me that maybe I was a bit too harsh, but please keep in mind this is just me trying to help you in the best way I can!

◇─◇──◇─────◇──◇─◇

Coming soon (girl, you have around 50 chapters, Lord help me) - FANTAESYSTIC

⍋