Hi there, Thomas-LF , thank you so much for waiting! Your Pinot Noir is finally ready. So just sit back, relax, and enjoy.

First impressions...

I'm not too thrilled about your cover. It's unattractive, and frankly, quite juvenile. The colors look drab, and all blend in together, making it difficult to make out the graphics. Initially, I thought the woman on the cover is deformed. Then, upon closer inspection, I realized that parts of her body seem to be covered in some shiny green slime. Keep in mind that it is important to have a cover that is relevant to your story and can attract the reader's interest. I'm sorry to say this, but it would take more than a woman partially covered in green scales and dressed in a bad BDSM/village girl cosplay to get me to pick up or click on your book. 

The summary is well-structured, though somewhat wordy and choppy. There are some areas where you don't need to use so many words to describe your ideas. For example, the part where Ailith is described as "born without noble blood, and with a family name that means nothing." This part feels unnecessary because I already know from the first part that Ailith is a commoner, a nobody, so there is no need to elaborate on it. Perhaps you can try to rephrase it to something hard-hitting but straightforward like "born a commoner with nothing to her name" or "born without the privileges of a Blueblood."

The rest of the summary is pretty informative. The last sentence is a nice touch, but I think it could be rewritten to make it flow more smoothly.

Onto the story...

Born a commoner, Ailith Natia must overcome a plethora of challenges as she strives to achieve her dreams of becoming a knight.

The first two chapters offer a glimpse of Ailith's early life. I love the simplicity and innocence we see in the young Ailith here. The encounter with two Knights on the same day feels cliché and unrealistic, but it is a good demonstration of the polarizing views of being a Knight. I like this particular scene because of what it signifies. While it doesn't deter Ailith from pursuing her dreams, it does foreshadow the difficult journey she will embark on, and how it transforms her in later life.

The time skip in chapter three is well-written. However, this is also where I start to see some problems.

First of all, your descriptions are incredibly detailed. Too detailed, I might add, or rather, over-detailed. It's evident from the start that you tend to describe everything right down to the last microscopic cell. In the first two chapters, you have done a thorough job of painting a complete picture for the readers. While it is nice to have so much information to form a visual, there's not a lot of room left for the readers to use their imagination and interpretation. One of the things you need to be aware of is the priority of your description. For example, what's more important? A play-by-play of Ailith sprinting down the stairs to answer the door? Or the names and descriptions of Ailith's parents (something that threw me off because there's hardly any description, but then suddenly, Ailith's father's name pop out of nowhere in chapter two)?

Another concern is that, from chapter three onwards, the description feels lacking. In fact, after the time skip, your descriptions went from overload to insufficient. It's disappointing since this is when you should go in-depth with the descriptions. After all, we have moved beyond Ailith's family inn and into a brand new world filled with new characters and species. Yet, it feels like you're eager to rush through the storyline so readers can finally get to the part where Ailith learns about the competition and jumps right into the journey of becoming a knight.

As fun as the chapters have been, do make sure you stay consistent with the pace of your story. In the beginning, the pace feels dragged due to over-description, and later feels rushed due to a lack of it. So be sure to pay attention to that if you ever plan on editing/rewriting your story.

One final thing: there are some contradictions in your description. For example, in chapter one, Kuval is described as wearing a black hood with a scarf wrapped around his face. Less than a paragraph later, you changed that to a 'makeshift scarf.' So now I'm confused: Is it an actual scarf, or a bandana, or what? Even though this is just a minor detail, it did throw me off while reading your story, and what's off-putting about it is that this happened in the first chapter. Again, consistency is the key, so make sure you pay extra attention to the details of your characters and settings.

What about Ailith?

In the beginning, Ailith Natia is a small, energetic girl with big dreams of becoming a knight. Even at a young age, her compassion knows no bounds, and that is perhaps one of my favorite things about Ailith. Twelve years later, that girl with the big dream is still there. However, she has since matured into a woman burdened with responsibilities and obligations. Despite these challenges, she remains optimistic and has never deviated from her goal of becoming a Knight.

I love how relatable Ailith's life is, and how easy it is to empathize and connect with her character. Even though I've only read eight chapters, I can already see the limitless potential in her. I can tell you have given a lot of effort into balancing the childlike innocence and hardened laborer into the character, and it shows. The woman who beat up a group of poachers and the woman who willingly gives away her dinner to a family of starving mice couldn't be more different. Yet, somehow, you managed to mold them into a single, fascinating character, so good job!

Grammar

Overall, I don't see any major grammatical errors. There are some minor mistakes here and there, but nothing serious that warrants immediate attention. The one issue I have is some of the words and phrases in your descriptions. While reading through the chapters, I noticed quite a few places that can be rewritten to express your ideas better. If you ever have time to edit your story, do work with an editor on this. 

Final thoughts

Other than what we have covered in this review, your story is going in a great direction. I am excited to see what life has in store for Ailith, and the adventures she'll have in her journey.It has been a privilege to read and review your book, and I wish you all the best with your writing.