A/N - sorry it taken so long to update this story! This chapter is quite dark, Adrian is going through a tough time, but I hope you like it! 

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We walked at night and took shelter as soon as the sun was set high on the heavens. My feet were killing me, though I couldn't find it in me to complain about it knowing there were people who served worse fates. Like my husband. Who knew what he was going through right now. Was he chained? Was he locked up in a prison? Would Roland torture him for information? I knew Mathew was strong. But how much pain could he take before he caved in? Roland had turned out to be a merciless man—who knew what pushed him into that black whole of hate. And for each day passing I feared for my husband's life to the point that I couldn't focus on anything else.

But we had to move forward. We needed to get help. As our feet took us further and further away from the man I loved we avoided every sight of settlements or people, knowing there could be soldiers there and not trusting the farmers' allegiance. Four days and nights had passed since we fled and by now the soldiers would have spread lies about my absence and propaganda in Roland's favor to all neighboring villages and towns.

"They will use my marriage to Mathew as a reason to hate me," I told Angela one morning.

"That's probably why they wanted you two to wed so quickly," she muttered, and her words made my heart sink in my chest.

Of course they weren't accepting of our relationship, they saw an opportunity to stain my reputation and took it. I fucking hated polititians! "Maybe I'll just stay in Faria," I muttered.

"Sounds good to me," she answered as we moved through the once plowed, muddy field which was a real pain to walk through. The mud kept slowing down our steps, making our legs burn from exhaustion. Even more annoying, it stubbornly seeped in, through whatever holes we had in our shoes, and made our feet wet and cold. It wasn't that our shoes were that worn out or anything, it just seemed like the muddy water found an entryway into the shoe anyway.

"Does it?" I sighed.

"Yes," she agreed but stopped to look at me, "you'll stay there and wait for things to calm down. You'll be safe there."

"While I let someone else rescue my husband? Is that the plan?" I muttered, knowing fully that was her plan. She wouldn't risk me getting caught and imprisoned if we went back on a rescue mission.

"You need to be safe Adrian," she responded. In my heart I knew that was the best plan. If they got a hold of me they would kill me and remove the problem. But I couldn't help but feel useless at that point. I was a king for fucks sake, I didn't want to sit idle and wait for others to do the work for me. I wasn't my father. Knowing she wouldn't understand, I decided not to speak more about it, there was no use in arguing with her right now. We were too tired and too hungry to have a good conversation. So I dropped it.

Eventually the mud turned into grass and we could walk with lighter steps, and it brightened our moods. Days and nights passed as we moved through different landscapes. No one bothered us and nothing happened that was out of the ordinary.

But a strange feeling kept nudging my brain—were they even looking for me? Did they believe I was dead? Did it matter to them? Maybe I was just a small inconvenience to them, not worth thinking about. Maybe they thought I was too weak to survive out here and put all of their focus on Mathew. They had taken my land already, so what now. Were they going after Faria? With Mathew imprisoned my guess was they would.

Dark thoughts seemed to hug my brain lately, and it was hard to snap out of them. Angela noticed and tried to lighten up the mood, but it didn't help. I felt useless, I felt weak and alone. What if we never found Rillons family? What if they hated the fact that he married me and they had disowned him for it, leaving him to rot in a prison cell. What if we starved to death before we had a chance to find them?

I sighed to myself as I looked through my bag after the last piece of rations we had left. I placed a piece of the salty dried meat in my mouth and savored the taste, but it only made my stomach cry out for more. But there was no more.

My body was used to five meals a day, and this change had really taken a toll on it. Suddenly I felt bad for my people, the people I had sworn to protect as I was crowned king. They were all used to being hungry, dirty and afraid for their lives. Now I knew what they were going through. If my head had been in a better place those thoughts would have encouraged me to walk faster, to find myself an army and storm my home and take it back. To hold my promise to them. But my mind was clouded with doubts, fear and insecurities. Everything I knew had been taken from me. Everything I loved and cherished was gone. The people I loved and had chosen as family had been killed or locked away, or forced to work for my enemies. For their enemies.

"What are you thinking about?" Angela's voice stopped my thoughts briefly, and I caught her worried eyes examining me.

"The usual," I sighed.

"He's stronger than most," she said, giving me an encouraging smile.

I nodded briefly and rearranged tha bag on my back. "I know, but he's not the only one I'm worrying about."

We exchanged glances, both feeling somewhat guilty for leaving our friends and family behind. But Angela had a fire inside her, a determination and a goal—she was protecting the King. Maybe that was the reason why she handled the situation a thousand times better than I.

The woman walked up to me and took my hand to give me some of her strength, holding it tightly as we continued our walk. "They are all stronger than you think," she mumbled, "relived by the thought that you managed to escape." She bumped her shoulder into mine, giving me a playful smile, "Adrian, never forget what you've done, you are the reason they find the strength to fight. They love you." I rolled my eyes at her, but her words helped. At least a little. "And before nightfall we'll arrive at the border, we'll find Rillon's family and we'll get the help we need," she said with determination. I should have felt excited but inside there was a battle going on, a battle between reason and fear. The fear of failing them all.