"Tamaki just realized our guests write gay fanfiction about us."
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Senpai No
Senpai Yes!

"Hey Tama-chan, how many fangirls does it take to summon a demon?" Kaito asked cheerfully.

"Why would they want to summon a demon?" Tamaki asked, horrified.

"None, because they're already demons." He snickered, watching Tamaki's face slowly twist into terror.

"Demons are real?" He whimpered.

"I don't know Tama-chan. Are they?" Kaito smiled darkly.

"Ta~ma~ki~!" One of his regulars sang before touching his arm.

"Kyaaaaaa!!!!!" Tamaki shrieked and sprinted away.

"Kaito-senpai you scared Tamaki again?" Kaoru asked.

"Yes." He said with no hint of remorse.

"I bet we could scare him more." Hikaru challenged.

"Ah, I see the young students have challenged thy master."

"What the actual hell are they talking about?" Haruhi asked Mori who only smiled.

"Yes. We. Have." Hikaru said with a smirk.

"I haven't." Kaoru piped up.

"Yes you have." Hikaru didn't even look back.

"We're going to lose."

"No we're not, do you trust me?"

"Yeah sure, Aladdin."

"Don't sass me mister."

"Well apparently I'm Jasmine, so that's a
Missy to you."

Kaito watched lazily as the the two traded sass with each other, casually turning his head to Honey and mouthing 'these guys.'

Honey giggled as Kaoru finally stuck his tongue at Hikaru who huffed and turned back.

"When Tamaki-senpai gets too scared, he cries in the janitor closet and grows three buckets of mushrooms, first to make him do it wins."

"Okay, rewards and punishments?" Kaito asked smoothly.

"Whoever wins takes a month off of cleaning up Tamaki's mess and harvesting his mushrooms." Kaito raised an eyebrow and nodded.

"Loser has to take over the harvesting of Tamaki's mushrooms and wake up Honey-senpai from his nap." Hikaru said confidently.

"Fuck that." Kaoru snorted and tried to walk away but Hikaru grabbed his arm with a cheery smile.

"I hate you."

"Love you too Jasmine."

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Round 1

Hikaru and Kaoru creeped up on Tamaki, both with a blanket over their head.

The lights suddenly went off and Tamaki yelped.

{Scary music start}

"Mommy? What happened to the lights?" He chuckled nervously.

Silence.

"M-Mommy?"

Creak.

"Honey-senpai?"

Shuffle.

"K-Kaito-senpai?"

Silence.

"D-Daughter?"

{Scary music pause}

"BOOOOOOO!" The twins screamed together.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Tamaki shrieked and ran away as fast as he could as he could go, out the door.

The two snickered together and mentally tallied, 1 for them, 0 for senpai.

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Round 2
Tamaki woke up surrounded in blood and bodies.

He screamed and scrambled away.

"Where am I?!? Haru-chaaaaan!" He screamed, turning around only to run into a crazed looking girl with a knife.

"T-Tamaki-san. I d-did this for you. We can be...together forever."

"NOOOOOOO! I'M VERY SORRY BUT I AM IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP, WE HAVE KIDS. GOODBYE NOW. ITS ME NOT YOU. YOU'LL FIND LOVE AGAIN. AHHHHHH!"

Kaito smirked as Tamaki ran around the Host Club in a Virtual Reality Simulator he had designed specifically for Tamaki.

Tamaki let out a blood curling scream and curled in on himself.

"What did he see?" Honey asked innocently.

"Probably the demon that tears into the player."

"STOOOP I'M TOO YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL TO DIE. NOT MY FACE. IT'S EATING MY JAAAW!"

"Hehehe."

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Round 3

The twins pushed Tamaki into a room.

"Haruhi is really here?! In a dress?!?" Tamaki asked cheerfully.

"Sure." They agreed easily before closing and locking the door.

The screams of hundreds of fangirls and Tamaki echoed as they walked away.

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Round 4

Tamaki screamed as hundreds of snakes fell from the ceiling as ran around, trying to rid of the harmless creatures.

Kaito smirked and sipped his coffee.

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Round 5
Final Round

Hikaru and Kaoru frowned as Kaito interrupted their attempt to set Tamaki on fire, to give the terrified blond a book.

"What is this s-senpai?" Tamaki asked timidly.

"Read it."

As Tamaki's eyes scanned the page, he slowly paled and closed the book before crawling into the janitorial closet to grow mushrooms.

"What was that?!?" The twins cried in disbelief.

"Lets just say Tamaki just realized our guests write gay fanfiction about us." Kaito laughed cheerfully.

"What?" The twins paled in unison.

"I know a girl who writes them about you two actually, should I ask her to-"

"NO!" They screamed. "You win! Christ just no."

"That's what I thought." Kaito huffed.

Hikaru shuddered and Kaoru eyed the book wearily where a picture of Tamaki and Kyoya were on the front cover.

"Oh by the way," Kaito drawled. "It's about time to end Honey-senpai's nap."

The two paled to almost a chalk white.

"Senpai no." Kaoru whimpered.

"Senpai yes!" He cackled delightfully.