'Professor'

30-Sep-2030, 1230U

Annabeth Chase, Hero of Olympus, Daughter of Athena

Camp Half-Blood

San Francisco, California, USA

"Seriously, why the hell was he so pissed off? I said I was sorry, didn't I?"

"Seaweed Brain, you disappeared for twenty years. What if I up and left for two decades then showed up out of nowhere like nothing's changed?"

"One: I didn't act like nothing's changed. Two: I would've only hit you once, and it wouldn't have even been that bad. It'd probably be something along the lines of yeeting you into the ocean with a catapult."

"You're a peach, Percy. You really are."

Jason had arrived early this morning for a two-week visit to Camp Jupiter—Pontifex Maximus duties on Temple Hill, and all that—with Piper tagging along as moral support (and to visit our Roman counterparts, of course). Deciding that Camp Half-Blood was in good hands, I decided to tag along to yell at Percy.

After giving him a piece of my mind for disappearing without a trace, we were having lunch at this deep dish pizza place in downtown San Francisco, which was actually Percy's idea, not mine—for a New Yorker, he sure likes the thickness—and were currently sipping our drinks and nibbling on fried mozzarella as we waited for the rest of our party to arrive.

As our conversation shifted from a pissed Grover to meaningless small talk, I took the time to analyze his... well, "true form" for the lack of a better term. Now, he looked like he was in his late thirties, complete with a five o'clock shadow and age lines—paired with his cargo shorts, old T-shirt, ballcap, and sunglasses, he looked like some random dad. The sea-green eyes and burn scars remained from his younger form, along with his generally cheerful smile—something that seemed to persist even after two wars and twenty years in the Navy.

Sure, I know he said that he was a diver—and I don't think he was lying—but he never made the claim that he didn't see combat. If he tried, I would've immediately called "bullshit." Sure, the Second Amendment was a thing, but based on the way he'd planned and fought during Operation Azrael (I can't believe I actually remember that) and Capture-the-Flag against the Hunt, there was no way he could've done things as well as he did without any combat experience.

And he didn't seem messed up. Sure, he had a darker (and dirtier) sense of humor, but he showed no real signs of agitation or stress that was common in combat veterans—both in the mortal and mythological worlds. Either he found an incredibly effective way to deal with it or he was a ticking time bomb. For his sake, I hoped it was the former.

"Oh, by the way, what time are they getting here?" Percy asked, breaking my reverie.

"Oh, they said they'll be here—"

"WHASSUP?!" two male voices exclaimed as hands clapped down on my shoulders, making me nearly jump out of my chair in shock. Turning around revealed none other than my younger twin half-brothers—still utter lunatics at thirty-one years of age—Matthew and Bobby. They were still skinny, but had gotten significantly taller. Plus, thanks to Bobby's obsession with beards and long hair and Matthew preferring to be clean-shaven with a neat haircut, everyone could actually tell the two apart.

"Dammit, you dweebs!" I groaned as they pulled up chairs to my left and right, each giving me a rough side-hug as they sat. "Why are you like this?!"

"You gotta chill out, sis!" Bobby soothed. "Come down to Malibu sometimes, catch some waves with me! There, you'll feel the ocean just caaaaalm your nerdy little head down."

"You're a marine biologist, not the friggin' Duke," Matthew bluntly replied.

"Nobody cares about your opinion, you're a software engineer!"

"Listen here, you little shit—"

"Language!" Lela—my stepmother—scolded as she and Dad finally arrived, saving me and Percy from enduring another one of Bobby and Matthew's ridiculous twin brother arguments. "Annabeth, good to see you."

"Hey, Lela. Dad," I greeted, giving each a quick hug. My stepmother and I had improved our relationship over the past twenty years to the point that we actually showed affection and care for each other with no problem. It was like Percy said: I still had a home there. "Oh, this is—"

"Percy Jackson! As I live and breathe!" Dad laughed as he outstretched his hand, clasping Percy's in a firm shake.

"Hey there, Dr. Chase. Good to see you again," Percy replied with a grin.

"C'mon, how many times I gotta make you call me 'Frederick?' You're making me feel old!"

"Well—"

"Finish that thought and I'll personally ensure that Old Dominion destroys your records."

"Aye-aye, sir."

"Wait, what the fu—" I exclaimed before Lela interrupted me with a strong "language!" "Sorry, but... Dad, what is happening?"

"So... you remember that time I was a long-distance adjunct professor at Old Dominion University because my friend in the history department called in a favor? Well, I had Percy in a few of my classes," Dad explained.

"I had to take some random electives to graduate, so I chose military history," Percy added with a shrug. "Plus, I remember you telling me how passionate Frederick here was about it, so I enrolled in his lectures."

"Yes, you and your buddy from the Navy... what was his name again?"

"Ajay."

"Oh, yes. How's he doing?"

"Gunnin' for a masters in mechanical engineering, if you can believe that."

"Oh, I can... a STEM student, but one of the most diligent in my class."

"I'm sorry, you mean that you knew that Percy was alive, kicking, and in the Navy... and you didn't tell me?!" I hissed, utterly pissed off at my father. "Are you serious?!"

"Hey, you never asked!" Dad shot back, holding up his hands in an attempt at placation (spoiler alert: it didn't work).

"Daaaad!"

"But yeah, I taught him history. You were doing a BS in... mechanical? Along with Ajay?"

"Yeah," Percy confirmed. "There was so much math involved...it really is mental abuse to humans!"

"I wouldn't go that far, but yes, it is a tortuous subject," Dad agreed with a solemn nod, as if he had endured some sort of traumatic event in math classes. "Honestly, when it comes to the hard sciences, I'm drawn towards chemistry more than mathematics or physics."

"Yo, this is a nice student-teacher reunion and all," Bobby interrupted before turning to Percy. "But bro, you're in the Navy? You surf any?"

"I've tried it a coupla times, but I was kinda terrible at it," Percy replied, making me roll my eyes. Sure, he didn't have any skill, but he could probably use his powers to do some crazy shit and not die—if dying was even possible for him, that is.

"Duuuuude, you gotta come down to Malibu sometime! It's friggin' awesome!"

"Percy, do not listen to this imbecile," Matthew warned. "Last time I went surfing with him, I got trapped on a rock with a buncha seagulls for four hours. The Coast Guard had to airlift my ass out because the waters were too dangerous for swimming!"

"For the millionth time, I said I was sorry!"

"Shaddap, dumbass! I'll forgive you when a whale eats you and shits you out!"

"Watch your profanity!" Percy interrupted, making them cease their bickering. "Anyways, Lela, how have you been? Life must be very boring without these two rambunctious rapscallions running about!"

"Well, it's the quiet retired life, I suppose," she replied. "Nice weather, though. And I'm glad to hear that your vocabulary has improved significantly."

"Oh yeah, Lela knew about Percy too," Dad interjected. "Remember when I said that she helped me out with grading essays because she had a better comprehension of grammar than I did?"

"Actually, come to think of it, we knew too!" Bobby realized with a snap. "Yeah, sometimes we were lookin' over Dad's shoulder while he was grading papers, saw him get particularly interested over Percy and Ajay's papers."

"I read some of them too. That paper of yours on the AC-130 was frickin' hilarious!" Matthew sniggered. "Seriously, the way you wrote made it sound like you were narrating a story, not creating an academic paper."

"I won't be lectured by someone who surfed so badly, he needed to be saved by the Coasties," Percy sassed back, making Bobby burst into laughter as Matthew shot each of them a Michael Phelps death glare.

"I cannot believe all of you!" I exclaimed, even more pissed off than before. "All of you knew about him, and you didn't tell me?! Not one of you thought to send me a message saying 'Oh, guess what? Your old best friend? Yeah, he's taking distance learning classes at Old Dominion University, where the esteemed Dr. Chase is a long-distance adjunct!' Seriously, what the hell?!"

"Er... you didn't ask?" Bobby replied after a few moments of awkward silence.

I then proceeded to cuss him out loudly and severely before Lela stopped me, scolding me for my language while Dad apologized to the patrons and staff. Thankfully, they still took our order and served us some incredible pizza, and the conversation shifted towards other things. Dad and Percy still talked occasionally about university—with some mentions of Percy's stepdad—while I mostly played catch-up with my family.

While Dad and Lela were living the retired life, Matthew and his wife had another baby girl—three kids total over five years of marriage—while Bobby had one divorce under his belt and no kids whatsoever, and had broken up with his most recent girlfriend a few weeks back. There really wasn't much I could do apart from offer my sympathies, but he didn't seem too broken up about it (something about her hooking up with some college students behind his back).

When lunch was all finished, we said our goodbyes and went our separate ways. We took a walk into an alley before I linked arms with him and teleported us to Camp Jupiter in front of the consuls' quarters—I do love efficiency, and the ability to teleport to the camps is probably my most used godly power.

"Woah-kay," Percy groaned as he bent over, shaking his head. "Yeah, that still sucks. Not as bad as shadow-traveling, but... whoo!"

"It's a bitch, Perce," I replied with faux-sympathy as I patted his back. "So what happens to you now, Mr. Sailor Man?"

"Well, I gotta head home tonight. We're on leave right now and as much as I love hangin' with y'all, I gotta make sure things are all good in Virginia."

"You're in Virginia?"

"Yeah, Vah Beach. I swim and run more than I surf."

"Huh. If we hadn't moved to Cali, I probably could've seen you at some point."

"If you hadn't moved to Cali, we wouldn't have been able to save yours n' Artemis's asses."

"Huh, so the Seaweed Brain actually has some gray behind all that green."

"Shaddap, Owl Bitch."

The rest of the afternoon was relatively lax, with most of it being spent just catching up through conversation. But behind Percy's back, the rest of the Seven—plus Reyna and Tyson (who had volunteered to educate the legion's engineering specialists)—concocted a scheme that we put into motion: a proper farewell party.

While Frank, Jason, and Tyson went to kidnap Percy, the rest of us prepared the festivities in Reyna's domus (which she shared with Leo), including some snacks, drinks, and... other activities. It was admittedly a rather juvenile conglomeration of things, but we felt as though we needed to give our boy a proper send-off.

"You know, twenty years ago, I would have never considered doing this," Reyna mused as she set down a plate of nachos on a table in the atrium.

"Well, that is the consequence of dating the Bad Boy Supreme!" Piper joked as she poured a drink for herself.

"AYO! DID I HEAR MY EPIC TITLE?!" Leo called as he clambered in, arms full of stuff.

"Mhmm," Hazel hummed as she made the finishing touches on a drawing she made for Percy, created with input from all of us.

"Here's the guest of honor!" Jason bellowed as the door blew open. In he came with Frank and Tyson, the three carrying a blindfolded laughing Percy. Once they made it to the atrium, they set him down and freed his eyes.

"SURPRISE!" we shouted, only making the sailor laugh harder, especially with all the decorations we'd set up: a banner saying "So Long, Seaweed Brain!", a large board with ridiculous photos of Percy from his time in CHB and CJ, and two large sketches recently made by Hazel. The first was from Operation Azrael, in which Percy was sitting atop Blackjack, firing his machine gun at the monstrous hybrid hydra. The second was from Operation Black Squirrel in which Percy—according to Reyna—led a ten-man reconnaissance team into the Mendocino National Forest. The sketch showed Percy and four others—"Viking 2," or something—in a skydive, barrelling towards the planet in tactical gear.

"Holy—Hazel, did you make these?!" he exclaimed in astonishment, looking over the sketches. "That's... that's friggin' incredible!"

"Thank you!" she replied with a bright smile. "Consider it—along with the one I'm not quite finished with yet—as a gift."

"However," Leo interjected. "This gift don't come free, chief."

"But then it's not a gift—" Percy replied.

"Shut up, Aquaman. Lose the semantics and bear with me... long story short, since your ass dropped off the face of the planet for twenty years... you gotta undergo a punishment."

"... I have a flight in the early morning. I'd rather not show up drunk."

"Don't worry! 'Cause you ain't drinkin' alcohol... you've got Tabasco!" Leo declared with a maniacal, pulling a rather large bottle of it from a bucket. "But no milk or anything to put out the fire!"

"... well, okay. Hit me with your best shot, I guess."

We started off relatively light, enjoying the snacks made by Leo and Reyna and the wine provided by Tyson (something about raiding Poseidon and/or Dionysus's stores to practice his stealth)—though Hazel, Frank, and Percy abstained from the latter, drinking non-alcoholic cocktails by Piper—as we conversed, catching up on the past. This included Percy's own retellings of Operations Azrael and Black Squirrel, as well as the takedown of a mind-controlled Nico di Angelo.

Yeah, that actually happened.

It reminded me of some of the lighter moments we'd had on the Argo II—minus Tyson, of course—as well as our own bonding time pre and post-Gaea where we were just teenagers messing around, not demigods trying to prevent the apocalypse. Honestly, this whole evening was ridiculously teenaged, especially when considering Leo's ideas that were about to come into fruition and the fact that all of us (discounting Hazel's former life) were effectively in our mid to late thirties. But if anything, I supposed it was a chance for us to engage in the teenaged shenanigans we didn't get to do much of in our youth. It was a reclamation, in a sense.

And an hour later, the drinking game commenced. Like before, Hazel, Frank, and Percy abstained from alcohol, instead having to drink equally-sized shots of Tabasco when necessary. It started out relatively structured, pulling from a set of cards that Leo acquired from the mortal world, before devolving into an abhorrent combination of Truth or Dare, Two Truths and a Lie, This or That, and Would You Rather, with drinking being the penalty for passing (if it wasn't some sort of challenge, that is).

At the moment, Percy was doing an absolutely ridiculous impression of me in response to my correction of Leo, somehow incorporating Jason's glasses into it.

"Jason, that is not correct," he simpered in what sounded like an odd cross between a Valley Girl and nerd accent, adjusting the glasses as the son of Zeus laughed his ass off. "Because according to the Encyclopedia Olympia, you aren't actually the god of electricity, but of lightning. Like, for real."

"Yooo, that makes sooo much sense!" Leo howled, crying with laughter as he nearly toppled over in a drunken haze had it not been for Reyna's quick action—though the consul wasn't exactly the spitting image of sobriety herself, looking a little tipsy from skipping over several ridiculous dares from Leo that would only be appropriate without the rest of us present. I'm pretty sure most of Leo's drunkenness was from him drinking for shits and giggles.

"I do not sound like that, you stupid Seaweed Brain," I grumbled as Percy handed the glasses back to Jason. "You will feel my wrath."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Professor," he mocked in the same nerdy accent. "Please, don't destroy my GPA! I need to be valedictorian!"

"How exactly do you know what that is?"

"Funny story, actually... you know your old man and I talked about a buddy of mine I took distance learning classes with? Yeah, he was the valedictorian, but he didn't give a speech at graduation because... shit happened. Salutatorian did it instead. Actually, now that I think about it, we didn't even have graduation. We just got a diploma and a congratulations letter... though that may have partially been because it took us 5-6 years to finish our degrees."

"... I was being sarcastic, I didn't expect an actual story."

"Well, Wiseass, I always go above and beyond!"

"ANYWAYS," Piper loudly hiccuped. "Enough of the banterrrrr! Peerce, I got a question for you... since you're the only single guy here... VIRGIN GODDESS ROUND! Screw, marry, kill Artemis, Athena, and Hestia!"

"Okay, let's see... if we're talkin' the Greek section, then killing Artemis is an easy one. Just a round between the eyes," Percy mused. "For screw... Athena."

"I beg your damn pardon!" I gasped, astounded by his brazen answer. "That is my mother you're talking about!"

"Wiseass, whaddaya want me to say? Screw Hestia? Hell no! Hestia's way too much of a sweetheart to just be screwed like a whore. I'd honestly marry her, considerin' how awesome she is! She's warm, she's kind, she's pretty, and she's dependable... wifey material! Now your mama on the other hand, she's mildly attractive at best—"

"Perce, maybe you should stop talking before we get struck down by Olympus knows what," Frank interrupted. "It's your turn."

"Fiiine... Frank, would you rather parachute into the ocean without a boat or be stuck in a car while it rolls over several times?"

"Wha—I'm sorry, what kinda question is that?!"

"I know some guys in the SEAL Teams—as well as the spec ops community as a whole—who have been caught in that crazy shit. And based on their storytelling... both suck."

"Well, I already know what parachuting is like—no thanks to you—so probably that one."

"Percy, why did you specify 'without a boat?'" Tyson asked curiously.

"Well, according to my frogman friend, if they're jumping into the ocean, they almost always have boats with 'em. It's pretty hard for even the most physically and technically capable men to do a long-ass dive over the course of several miles—if they're tryin' to do some stealthy shit, I mean."

"You mean like in the movies?"

"Yeah, like in the movies."

"That reminds me!" Leo declared before standing and almost falling on his face—again saved by Reyna. "EVERYONE! THE TIME HAS COME... EXECUTE ORDER 420!"

Ah, yes... "Order 420," otherwise known as my own personal idea of revenge. We all gave Percy wide grins as we reached underneath the sofa or whatever chair we were sitting under, and pulled out the instruments of Percy's quasi-destruction.

"You scumba—" was all Percy managed to get out before he was showered in a hail of Nerf darts, courtesy of all of us—yes, even Reyna, who was cackling maliciously as the son of Neptune dove for cover, with us all chasing after him. Leo got there first, pulling a Nerf hatchet from his tool belt (why the hell does he always wear that thing?) and swinging it with a loud battlecry. But Percy was ready, throwing the young god to the ground with some sort of grappling technique before picking up the Nerf gun and aiming it at us.

"LEEEROOOOOOOOY JEEEENKIIIIINSSS!" he bellowed as he engaged in a vicious counterattack, rapidly firing as he charged, hitting all of us at least once as we stumbled back, laughing like idiots. I ran out of ammo and tried to make a run for it, but Percy had yanked me off the ground before dumping me on the sofa and stealing my gun. Before I even had a chance to recover, he'd tossed Piper onto the sofa with me, with her collapsing on top of me with a yelp and drunken giggles.

"C'mere, you little—" Frank hissed as he chased Percy around the room, almost like a rifleman from the days of yore with a bayonet. Tyson sidestepped into Percy's path, but the elder brother was quicker, circumnavigating the cyclops and leaping onto his back with all his might.

"IT'S OVER, FRANK! I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND!" Percy declared as he used his position atop Tyson to wreak havoc on the son of Mars. The cyclops betrayed us in the meantime, allowing Percy to use him as high ground while he began firing on the rest of us.

"TRAITOR!!" Leo shouted before getting a faceful of Nerf darts from Tyson.

"Long live the brotherhood!" Tyson guffawed as he passed a clip—or magazine, I wasn't sure—up to his elder brother.

"YIPPEE-KI-YAY, FOOLS! YIPPEE-KI-YAY!" Percy cheered as Tyson began spinning, allowing them to wildly fire in all directions. "YOU CANNOT MESS WITH THE BEST!!"

"SCREW YOU!!" I shouted back.

"YO MAMA!!"

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

"DIE, BITCH!"

"Okay, I must sit down," Tyson mumbled as he stopped spinning, quickly setting Percy down before dizzily collapsing.

"NOW YOU'RE GOING DOWN, HIJO DE PUTA!!" Reyna shrieked as she and Hazel emerged from behind a chair, firing several well-aimed darts at Percy's chest and face.

"BRING IT, RA-RA! BRING IIIIIIT!" Percy laughed before nailing both goddesses between the eyes and ducking to reload. But that brief halt in action was all the son of Zeus needed to strike.

"DIE!" Jason shouted in a surprisingly good impression of Coach Hedge, whacking Percy with a Nerf baseball bat before tackling him to the ground. They continued their horseplay, with Percy managing to flip their positions and pin Jason on the floor after a few moments—a clear victory, had it not been for Leo and Frank leaping in to dogpile the rampaging Percy.

"SONUVA—OOOF!" Percy grunted as the four men crumpled together in a heap, with poor Jason wheezing on the bottom as the rest of us—high on adrenaline and/or drunk—were too busy laughing our asses off. "Okay, fine, fine, fine! Uncle, uncle! Off, off, off, off!"

"Boys, y'all need to get off before he's crushed!" Hazel scolded, barely managing to speak through her fit of giggles. Slowly, but surely, they managed to untangle themselves before ending up on their backs, breathlessly laughing.

"So... I know I can't drink milk 'cause it'll quench the Tabasco," Percy gasped, looking over towards a panting Leo. "But can I get water, at least?"

"Go ahead, bro."

"Here," I offered Percy a cup that he accepted with a tired grin.

"Thanks, Professor Chase."

"You gotta send me those papers of yours. I wanna read them now."

"No way in hell."

"Wait, you wrote academic papers?" Jason asked further away on the floor, where Piper laid on the ground beside him, still drunk. "Dude, I gotta read those now."

"No way, Sparky."

"I'm interested!" Hazel said.

"Hazeeeeel...."

"Please?" Frank asked.

"... y'all are gonna be the death of me, I swear."

Comedy with the Chases!

Given the timeline, I think there's a good chance Frederick doesn't retire until or after 2020. And before then, why not have him teach a pair of Navy SEALs about military history? Now I'm thinking of having at least one distance learning flashback to go a little deeper into it. Paul and Kayak (and maybe even Sally) definitely helped Percy a lot when it came to getting his bachelor's degree.

But that's all I have for you fine people today. Let me know in the comments what's good and bad! And as always, thanks for reading!

Until next time,

- ADF-2