Dragging an unconscious man through the woods surrounding campus should've tired you, but the adrenaline pumping through your veins is enough to fuel you in order to keep going. You have to maintain your head from going back to what happened. You have to keep going and dragging him, so when Carol sees you and runs your way, you don't stop. His maternal "be careful" gets lost to you. It's not until a heavy body hits the ground beside you that you realize a walker was fairly near you and about to take a bite. You glance up to see Carol with a stern expression on her face.

"Child, what happened to you?" She looks at Shane, "what happened to him?"

You refuse to peek at the body you're carrying. "Could you call my dad, and ah, Sam and Dean? Please?" The last you want to do is explain twice. It'd be better to get a move on things, tie the demon, and get the answers you need.

Carol hesitates for a moment, but something in your eye must be enough to convince her to stop her questioning and do as you ask. She turns around and runs towards, where you suppose, your dad and the brothers are. You keep dragging Shane to one of the public bathrooms. There, you manage to handcuff him up into a water pipe and draw a devil's trap under him. Your father, Dean, and Sam arrive shortly after. Carol and Daryl are with them.

When Rick steps into the bathroom, he takes everything at once. First, you're in the corner furthest from the demon, watching him like a hawk for when he wakes up. Your body is tense, and your clothes are soaked with blood. Human, fresh blood, not the putrefactive thing walkers have. Then, his ex-best friend, unconscious and restrained. The wounds on his abdomen have stopped bleeding, and they're healed. There's only a trace of blood that could explain the one on you.

"Are you ok?" The tone of his voice is calm, but you can see a battle about to occur in his eyes. You can sense the edge of his tone. He's keeping a composure he's about to lose.

Though, before you can answer, Sam pushes everyone else out of the way -almost knocking off Dean in the process- and run towards you. "What happened?" He's checking you for injuries, you know he finds none when his body relaxes. Yet you can see he can't take his eyes off your shirt's few ripped buttons. You don't want him to ask, and even less in a room full of other people. They all must guess part of the situation, but one thing is theorizing and another is knowing for sure.

"I think we've just had a visit from Lucifer's lackeys." It is then that the Winchesters notice the devil's trap drawn on the floor. They stiffen.

You explain the whole ordeal, trying to avoid Shane's rape attempt. But you can see it, you can see them filling in the blanks themselves. And you hate the shame you feel. It wasn't your fault, why does it feel like you have to hide it?

Just as you're finishing your story, Shane begins to stir in his sleep. Though you have a feeling that he might've been faking it to eavesdrop. His booming laugh forces you to stop mid-sentence. "Oh, sugar, you're leaving out the best part of our little encounter, don't you think?"

The handcuffs on his wrist shake violently when he tugs on them. The metal breaks easily and cuts through the pipe. You're lucky that bathroom doesn't have running water, otherwise the devil's trap would've been erased by it, and then the demon would've escaped. Instead, even though Shane is free from his restraint, he cannot step out of the drawn symbol. He stands up to his full height, still smirking like a madman.

"Shut the fuck up," Dean brutally splashes something on the demon's face.

When he starts crying, you realize that it's holy water. Dean's carrying it in a flask you've seen him with several times. You're surprised that, even after the news the demons weren't on earth anymore, he still has protection against them. You're supposed now that never letting your guard down comes with being a hunter. Otherwise, why did Sam give you an iron knife, just in case? Now you thank your life for it. Looking to the side, you realize that your father is a little out of his game with this whole supernatural business, but he is trying to keep on his poker face and tough attitude. From the corner of your eye, you can also witness how Sam is trying to keep his composure as best as he can from the demon's words. You don't want them to dwell on them too much, so you step up and say:

"You said you know where the Devil is, spill it out, demon." Your voice is harsh and unforgiving, you don't have time to play games with Shane's fantasies. And above all, the least you want to do is remember those dreadful moments.

To your luck, the demon moves past them, and onto the more serious affairs. "And why would I tell you that, um?" He does have a point. There's no way he's going to spill all of Lucifer's secrets because you happened to trap him.

Dean takes a step closer and smirks at demon Shane, there's something dark on him that you've never witnessed before. "Do you know Alistair?" The question is off-topic, you glance at him strangely. Rick, Carol, and Daryl mirror your expression. The only one that seems to know what's going on is Sam, and you're not reassured by his grimace. Unbothered by the reactions, Dean continues, "I was his top star student, and I can confidently tell you, you and I are going to have some quality time."

To his credit, the demon actually appears scared. "You wouldn't dare to do that again."

"Oh, in order to find that winged asshole, I assure you, I will."

You're not sure what Dean is talking about by mentioning Alistair, nor what he's about to do that demon Shane seems to be so scared. Nevertheless, when he asks for everyone to clear the room, no one makes any objections. You notice that your father is about to protest, but the look on Sam's face stops anything he has to say about it. Before you leave, though, Dean makes a list of strange requests for Daryl to bring back, like knives and other tools. Once a door closet closes behind you, you realize what Dean is about to do. There's some odd feeling in the pit of your stomach that makes you want to go back into the room and stop Dean from doing anything. Rick must have discovered the truth as well because he takes a step back to the room. Sam stops him.

"He knows what he's doing."

Your father is slightly furious, "I don't care if he's done this before, we don't do this. We aren't like this."

"I don't know if we should let him," Carol voices her thoughts as well.

For a moment, you agree with Carol, not because you wish to keep Shane safe, but because you wish to keep Dean from torturing anybody.

Sam shakes his head, "we've been through this before several times. There are no other ways to make demons talk." From the stories you remember they told you, you know that this is true.

"Still, that IS Shane, isn't it?"

Even though the question is not directed at you, you answer it in your mind. Yes, Shane is still in there somewhere, and his mind fueled the demon's desire for you. However, you're not sure that whatever is left of Shane after all these years is worth saving. He has had many mistakes in the past, from the moment he slept with your mother. It wasn't a joke when he tried to kill your father to take over his role as the leader. And it definitely was not a joke when, just hours before, he tried to rape you. Because, you know, deep down, that even though the demon brought out the worst in Shane, that was all him. Thus, even if Shane is still in there, is he really worth saving? Do you really want Judith to grow up with a father like that? At this moment, you blame yourself for stopping your father from killing him back at the Greene farm. You wouldn't be in this mess if you hadn't.

"Yes," Sam answers, "he is still in there, but... if he has received mortal wounds, he'll die anyway once the demon is out of his body, and judging by the blood on his shirt..."

None of them say it out loud, and none of them look at you, but they all know that you've injured Shane well enough for him to die when the demon is out of his body. Some part of you knew that this would happen when you were stabbing him in the abdomen, yet you didn't stop. It was his life or yours. Rick doesn't look as sad as he might've been if you had told him a few years back that his best friend was a condemned man. You think that he almost looks relieved, about what, you aren't sure.

"Maybe there's another way to figure out Lucifer's whereabouts," Carol suggests.

For the first time, Daryl speaks up, "maybe, but they ain't happening right now. From what they've told us, this is the first time a demon has made himself present, ain't that right?"

"Yes," Sam agrees, "besides, since Pestilence released the virus we haven't had any news on Lucifer..." he hesitates, but doesn't add anything else. Something within you tells you that he's hiding something. Do you already know Sam well enough to tell when there's more than he lets on?

"Alright, but I want to be there with him."

Sam instantly shakes his head, "trust me, you don't." The severity of his words gets to your father. A deep crease forms between his eyebrows. "I don't think Dean wants anyone seeing him like that."

It takes a moment for your father to make up his mind. You try hearing something from inside the bathroom, but it's silent. Is Dean just staring at the demon, or is he talking lowly at him? Finally, Rick agrees and lets Daryl go gather what Dean asked for. Then, with a tired sigh, Rick murmurs:

"I'm going to go talk to the others and see if father Gabriel can bless some more water. I got a feeling we're going to need it."

From then on, everyone splits. You and Sam decide to stay by the door, just in case something happens with Dean and the demon inside. You're aware that they're gonna have to knock him out again in order to tie him properly for... torture. You'd rather not think about it.

"Maybe..." He looks unsure about what to tell you, instead, he decides to say nothing and takes off his flannel to give it to you. It isn't until then that you remember you must look like a mess, with your bloody shirt and buttons halfway done.

"Oh, thanks," you take the offer from him, but before you put it on, you hesitate. Are you going to wear it over what you have? If you do, it's only going to get dirty.

Sam sees your predicament because he says: "I, um, I'll turn around and check that no one comes." He does as he says, and you quickly change shirts.

Despite the fact that you've been sharing a room since you arrived at the campus, it doesn't mean that you've seen each other naked or even in your underwear. You're not sure if you're taking it slow on purpose, or if there's just too much going on to think about anything else. Have you considered it? Sure, but always as a passing thought that gets swiped away by more pressing matters, like the security that building a wall would bring.

"I'm done."

Sam turns around and smiles at you. There's something sad in the gesture, like he's thinking about why you had to change shirts. When he opens his mouth, you know what's coming: "Did Shane try to...?" He doesn't get to finish the sentence, he can't.

"Yes." That simple word brings deep distress and fury to his features. "But he couldn't," you quickly reassure him, or maybe you are just reassuring yourself. "He only... Did some things." You don't specify, and he doesn't ask you to.

"I'm sorry," he says.

"It's not your fault," your response is immediate.

"Lucifer is looking for me and found you instead, of course it's my fault."

You take his hand in yours and place it on your cheek. "No. It is not your fault. Shane had- he always-," the words fail you, but you manage to gather your thoughts. "Since my mother died, Shane has had a thing for me." Sam places his hand on your hip and brings you closer, like trying to protect you from your invasive mind going around unwanted memories. "I think that fueled the demon to do what he did, I think the both of them tried to benefit from the situation. So, no, it's not your fault." You could never blame Sam for what happened, the only one that is to blame is the demon and Shane.

Sam nods once, but the tension in his shoulders is still there. You bury your head into his chest and bring him into a hug, he quickly corresponds. His heartbeat is steady, and the rhythm manages to settle your nerves. For the moment, you forget what happened in the woods, you forget that there is a demon in your camp, and you even forget what Dean is about to do. There's nothing better than being in Sam's arms.

Five minutes later, Daryl comes back with the tools Dean requested. You just get a glimpse of them, but you can see that the repertoire is quite diverse. The screams start shortly after he comes out. You've never witnessed torture before, and you're not about to do it now, but hearing Shane's cries is probably almost as bad as seeing it happen. You try not to dwell on it too much, and above all, you try not to enjoy it as some sort of revenge for what he did to you. Mostly, you're worried about the Dean that is going to come out after. Sam must be too because he keeps glancing into the door's room, yet, he doesn't try to go in and stop his brother. They're tired of the apocalypse and losing people because of it. This must be some sort of silent sacrifice they're willing to accept. Nevertheless, and to your luck, the demon doesn't take long to break. Not even 15 minutes later, Dean comes out with bloody hands and a deep frown on his face.

"He doesn't know anything about Lucifer's whereabouts, he was just bluffing." There's clear disappointment in his words that you also feel when you hear them. "But he knew about the Colt." Dean quickly adds. He smiles a little, though the happiness doesn't reach his eyes. "We're about to take a road trip a few miles east, there's a lead on the gun. Let's hope this time it's accurate."

Sam nods, "it is, I didn't tell you this before, but I had a dream today." He looks at you guiltily. "Lucifer came to me in my dreams..."

Dean doesn't let him finish, he is completely spooked by his brother's words. "What the hell do you mean Lucifer came to you? What did he say?"

"Nothing too important," Sam gestures dismissively. "It was the usual crap about him finding me and wanting me to say yes, but I had this dream today, and this is the first demon we've countered since the world went down. I think what the demon said is legit."

You're not sure if you should be angry because Sam didn't tell you that he dreamt of Lucifer the very same day that a demon tried to rape you, or if you should feel concerned that he dreamt of Lucifer at all.

"Well," Daryl interrupts your thoughts, you nearly forgot he was there, "let's gather everyone and share the news. We really need to find that gun."

Daryl turns around and walks away to what you assume is where your father is. Dean grabs the Demon killing knife that Sam is holding and enters the room again. You can guess what he's about to do by the determination on his face. When you look back at Sam, he still has a guilty look in his eyes. Whatever issues you may have with his revelation, you really need to put that aside. You have an archangel to kill.