My father was preparing to visit the king. The princess and I have always been close, visit the castle are really boring, but talking with the princess Amelie was my only joy in that place.

"Can I go with you?" I ask while help him to fasten the mantle.

"I thought you hated court meeting, with all those crazy lords to get your hand" he smiles.

"I hate it, but I would like to talk with the princess." I stated "I have matters to deal with her."

"And what my young daughter has to deal with your Highness?"

"We'll talk about dresses and lords" I smile with my lie.

"And how long have you been interested for dresses and lords?"

"Sir. My father, I may not be entirely traditional, however, I'm a girl yet" I replied with a laugh.

"I know, yet I'm so sorry, this time you can't come with me, the invaders from kingdom Gafries are attacking the castle walls and the nobles' houses. They want our kingdom and I want you here, in safety."

"It's all right. Make a safe trip" I wished.

"I'll be back before dawn."

I watched from the window while my dad got in the carriage, some guards followed him on horseback, no more than five, another ten stayed to take care of me. My thoughts were turned to my dad, I didn't even hear Nina called me to dinner.

"Milady?" she called.

"Nina, I already asked you not call me that. What do you want?"

"The dinner is served. Window isn't a safe place..."

"Because archers could easily hit me" I completed in a sigh. "I have a bad feeling."

"You always get a bad feeling when your father leaves you at home."

"You're right!" I smiled following Nina to the dining room.

I still had dinner with the bad feeling. I barely managed to swallow some portions of food; Nina helped me with the corset and prepared my bath. When I was finally ready, she came to light the fireplace in the bedroom, winter punished us, while with a brief good night the maid left the room, leave me alone with my thoughts.

I turned in bed trying to sleep, but my mind was in a whirlwind, my fears haunted me and I desperately tried to imagine my dad well, in the castle, Amelie asking for me and him making an excurse about me not being well, the princess would certainly send a gift to me. When I finally fall asleep, images of dead people, beheaded horses and Amelie with a cut throat filled my dreams.

I sat on the bed trying to see in the darkness in my bedroom, the fireplace had gone out, I heard hurried steps and whispers from the hall. I got out of bed and took the dagger from under the pillow, I wrapped my body in a robe. I walked with slow steps trying not to make noises, the dagger was in my hand hidden behind my back. I half-opened the door and stick my head out.

The weak light, I could recognize Nina and one of our guards, I walked down the corridor towards them and she turned around to look at me, Nina was drying tears on her face, my heart sped up, I opened my mouth to speak, nonetheless, my voice didn't come.

"We didn't want to wake up you yet, milady" the guard said.

"What did happen?" I asked finally recovering my voice.

"Liza, there was an ambush" there were few times when Nina called me Liza and most of them, something really bad was happening.

"Where is my father? Did he come back?" I inquired. Their silence only increased, the dagger fell out of my hand and the guard looked like surprise to see the weapon. "Nina, please. Tell me what is happening!"

I felt my body shake.

"Your father didn't survive the attack."

In the beginning, her words seemed empty, distant. When I finally understood the meaning, my knees went weak and I fell down sitting, tears rolled down my face, without me noticing, I was aware that some words were whispered by me, I just don't know right what I was saying.

The man took me in his arms and Nina opened the door to my bedroom, the guard putted me on the bed, while in I continue saying incomprehensible things. Lying down, leaning against pillows, I watched the sunlight coming in through the window, Nina entered the bedroom and wished her condolences, she explained that the burial would be in the crypt of the nobility, next to the castle. I just nodded, I didn't say anything while she prepared my black dress, then fix my hair and even she put the dagger in my boot.

"Thank you, Nina." She looked at me amazed for I spoke for the first time, at least something understanding. "You have been with me since I can remember and now, you're the closest to a family in my life."

"Liza. I take care of you since you were a baby, but I know that you must learn how to see me just for what I am, a servant. Your uncle sent a messenger to warn that he, his wife and your cousins going to come here. They'll live with you until the issue the testament will be resolved."

"Ah! The testament of my father" I repeated. "It's obviously that my uncle and aunt will be here."

I looked at Nina one last time and walked to outside the bedroom.

"Liza, they already are here!" she screamed in my back.

The servants were all watching me, all with sad eyes, I went down the stairs and when I was about to head for the door, someone cleared his throat behind me. I turned around to see my uncle and aunt, they brought the children, the four already married with theirs spouses and their only son single, Patrício, he's seventeen like me.

"Uncle" I greeted with a nod. "Did you make a quiet travel?"

"Desperate!" my aunt answered. I always imagined the reason to did a lady like my aunt to married with my father's brother. "Carlos lost his brother; he was in tears all the way here."

"Understandable" I stated looking at his green eyes, the skin was as pale as ever. But there was no even a trace in his eyes that showed that he was crying.

"How are you, cousin?" Patrício asked me.

"I don't know" I said sincerity. "We need to go, the funeral will be near the castle, it's a little travel."

I walked to the door and heard my relatives' footsteps behind me. The guard that helped me during the dawn reached out to help me get on the carriage. I thanked and sat alone, I expected to have the freedom to cry as much as I wanted during the travel, but my aunt got in the carriage and sat across from me, followed by my uncle who joined her and, finally, Patrício who sat next to me. He tried to take my hand; however, I clasped my hands on my lap.

The carriage moved and for a long time, I only watched my house getting distant as we followed the path to the castle. I tried to ignore my cousin's or even my uncle and aunt attempts to talk, I knew that ignore them was unkind, yet, my life was sufficiently unhappy that I wanted my space.

When the carriage stopped and one of the castle's lackeys opened the door, I was the first to hold his hand and go down. Amelie was there wearing a black dress, as soon as I arrived, she ignored all the rules of composure and hugged me. I wanted to collapse in my friend's arms, but none of us is just a girl, we are more than that and to people like us appearances matter.

"I'm so sorry, Liza" she whispered.

"Thank you" I said when I already didn't know what say.

"Your father was an honor man, your lost is very hard to us too" the prince said in the side of his sister, they had the same red hair, they inherited this characteristic from their mother, since their father has darker hair than mine.

"Thank you for your words, Your Highness" I said while bowing to the prince.

We didn't talk much, my relatives wanted to greet and flatter the prince and princess, while I stayed next to my father's coffin. The funeral looked like a blur to me and I admit I don't remember much of what happened. When we came back at home and my relatives stayed in some of the rooms, I went straight to my bedroom and lay down. I tried to cry; however, the tears no longer came. I removed the cloak and threw it on the desk chair, I was almost loosening the lace of the corset when someone slammed the door.

"Yes?" I asked and my cousin opened the door entering. "Patrício. What do you want? I'm not well."

"I just came to demonstrate my feelings" he closed the door behind himself and walked slowly towards me.

Patrício wrapped me in a hug and I stood with my arms immobile on my body, I didn't really know how to react to this situation. I waited until he released me, probability tired of waiting for me to return the hug, so he held my hands and kissed them, I didn't say anything, I just watched him.

"I'm sorry for your father. Really." I nodded slowly. "If you need some help, whatever it's, no matter what time, you can call me."

"Patrício, you're very kind, but could you leave me alone? I'm really tired, I didn't sleep last night."

"I understand" he smiled and kissed my hand before turned around. "Good night, milady."

As soon as the door was closed, I watched it for a time, waiting for someone else to knock to bother me. I opened the corset and finally I took a deep breath. Already under the sheets I was staring at the ceiling, listening to the noise of the many people walking around my house.

The nightmares were recurring, I saw my dad bleeding with an arrow in the throat, I saw someone with a hood with the arrow pointed at him. I would want to discover the mystery behind his death, I followed the hooded archer. I woke up startled and wrapped myself in the robe, I opened the door and I spotted two of our guards talking at the top of the stairs. They seemed to hold something and evaluate the object, I left the bedroom and walked to the two, the men turned around to me, I realized how uncomfortable the situation was, me wearing a robe over a nightgown trying to look strong.

"Milady" an of them said and watched the floor. The other did the same thing.

"What do you have?" I questioned.

"We were going to take this to your uncle, miss. It's the arrow that killed your father, we are in charge of investigating his death."

"Let me see the arrow" I asked reaching out. The guards faced each other and seemed not quite sure what to do.

"We told to your uncle that we would give him the arrow" the second guard said.

"My uncle isn't here now, right?" I inquired. "I'll keep the arrow."

The first guard seemed frustrated, yet, gave me the arrow, the arrowhead was black and the plumage green and blue.

I watched all the details of the object before broke it in the middle, the men looked like surprised with my gesture, I returned the arrowhead to them.

"You can give this part to my uncle. And, please, don't let him know that I'm with the plumage." An of them took the broke arrow and acquiesced. They seemed to want telling something else, but they seemed uncertain. "I know before everything happened, you didn't have contact with me, however, from now on, we need to talk more often. So, if you have some problem, please, I want you looking for me immediately."

"Milady. I know that it's not kind of me, but our families depended from our cash. Payment should have been made yesterday" he explained.

"Don't worry, everything is fine. I understand your families' necessities, you have my promise, everybody'll has payment tomorrow" I promised.

"Thank you, milady." he bowed and I copied the gesture. "You're more like your father than we imagined."

"Thank you" I said before come back my bedroom.

I knew that I couldn't sleep, so I lit a candle and started rummaging through my closet looking for clothes. Already dressed I went down the stairs and walked until my father's office, be in that room and don't see him sitting at the desk was sad, tears formed in my eyes, but I forced me to be strong. I sat down in the chair and started to read the documents, I found his testament that I already read, so I saw a page that I had never even read.

I read and reread the text several times, to be sure of the content, my candle went out and the room was completely darkness. I stayed to sit, waiting the dawn, my thoughts went from happy moments not so long ago, to actual sad moments, I would want to cry and waiting the pain pass, however, I didn't have this time, the problems before resolved for my dad, now they need my attention.

Remembering my last conversation with my father, I was sure, he felt that something would happen, he was saying goodbye in his own way, I would want to be stronger, but the pain shattered my heart with every little memory.

Barely noticed when the winter sunlight started to fill the room and I woke up to my reality when the office door was opened.