this was hard to write okok so that's why this kinda sucks tbfh but at least it's over now ((: but seriously if i have to do one more imagine that includes turning off emotions and someone trying to turn them back on i will throw my laptop out of the window because i aM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS

AND THIRTY IMAGINES TO GO OKAY I CAN TOTALLY DO THIS I'M SUPER MOTIVATED BECAUSE AS MUCH AS I LOVE WRITING THESE,, I JUST REALLY WANT TO PUBLISH SOME OF MY DRAFTS BUT I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULDN'T DO IT UNTIL THIS BOOK WAS DONE FOR GOOD SO YEH

i have such great plans for the final imagine i cri you have no idea it's going to be so awesome (((::: feel free to guess, though i won't reveal it aHAHAH and okok i still have some things to solve and stuff but right now it seems like it's going to be amazing. and one of my favorite imagines although last year i said i can't do it but !!

OH AND IN CASE YOU NEED TO BE WARNED,,THERE'S PLENTY OF DEATH IN THIS IMAGINE AND SUBTLY MENTIONED SUICIDE FOR LIKE 0.003 SECONDS

///

Imagine that everyone loves you so when you turn your emotions off they try to get you back together

  Your whole life had been a struggle. You were a complicated young woman for sure, but despite your constant worries and the tragedies that your life seemed to consist of - which was quite typical for the residents of Mystic Falls - you weren't Elena Gilbert 2.0, which was a nickname you had heard before but kindly declined. You weren't anything like Elena.

  For starters, you wanted to be a vampire, whereas it was the last thing Elena dreamed of, but you had your reasons. You were a tough girl, but the punches and kicks that life threw at you, out of no-fucking-where, had softened and bruised you to a point where you just wanted to turn off your emotions and be cold and heartless without a single worry in sight. Naturally, you didn't know it wouldn't be that easy, but you wanted to be a vampire nonetheless and that was where you most differed from the Gilbert girl.

  And when no one would turn you into one, you took matters into your own hands. It wasn't dying for good, right? - that was the thought that lingered in your mind as you took your own life, taking in one last breath before falling into a darkness that most people mistaked for eternal. But in reality, you were only gone for merely a couple of hours, before coming back with a gasp.

  It was a tragedy that your friends hated to witness, you dying and coming back as a vampire, but although you were admittedly desperate, you had also gotten what you wanted. You were one step closer to being happy, which to you meant not feeling happy at all, in fact you didn't want to feel a damn thing, and no one was going to stop you from getting that. So, as soon as you had sunk your new shiny fangs into some random resident you found wandering in the shadows of the street and made yourself officially a vampire, you flipped the switch.

  Being a vampire only heightened every emotion, and to you, it was like a nightmare. You had so much bottled up inside, yet so much already poured out, it was quite safe to say you were a legit trainwreck and the only escape of the hell on earth, to you, was turning all the feelings off. Stefan came to you too late, telling you that it would only be worse when you would flip the switch again, but you no longer carried interest in any of the people surrounding you. All that mattered now, was survival on your own, feeding as much as you wanted to, and how you had to run, run, run until you would be numb, hollow and completely careless.

  But, as Katherine had once said, to you, the emotions would never stop trying to kick in. And no matter how much you would run, they'd catch you eventually and you'd lose your balance, falling into a mess worse than the one you tried to turn your back on.

///

  "This is a terrible idea", Elena sighed as he and Damon roamed through the hallways of Mystic Falls High, seeking for the one and only Matt Donovan, whose services were once again needed. It was familiar to the blue-eyed boy to take risks for his friends, and therefore he was the first person that came up in a plan of getting the good old Y/N back.

  "More like the worst idea ever. But you know, when the mighty Mikaelsons suggest something, it's for the best to just go with it. Especially when this is about Y/N and her safety and happiness", Damon said with a fake smirk, trying to seem happy as they snaked through the crowds on the hallways. Elena rolled her eyes, but sealed her lips and followed the arrogant Salvatore to the locker where they found the beloved Quarterback who would have to allow his neck to be snapped.

  "Donovan", Damon said and smacked his locker shut, startling the young man who quickly took his earphones out with a fearful look painted on his features. Elena gave her a calming look and a warm smile, but Matt had told them to not bother him unless it was something very important, so he knew already this wasn't about the latest math homework. He wanted to live without vampires surrounding him, although in Mystic Falls that was a serious challenge, but the gang tried to respect his choices.

  "You need to die", Damon added with a mischievous smirk, earning a scoff from Matt who turned his back on the two vampires. He started to walk away, a stack of books pressed against his chest, his blue eyes rolling around as he created distance between him and his least favorite Salvatore brother, but Damon was quick to catch him, with Elena following right behind. Damon's hands grabbed Matt, and he was pushed against the lockers while their eyes locked and fought angrily, trying to beat the other.

  "Sorry, takes at least from one to three business days for your delivery to arrive", Matt spoke through gritted teeth, evident sarcasm in his tone and it made Elena suffocate a sincerely amused chuckle, knowing that Damon wouldn't appreciate it so she masked her laughter into a cough. Damon narrowed his eyes at Matt, unhappy with his response, and for a second his unexpected grip on the Donovan's collar loosened and he could escape from the two again. But, since pretty much the whole town loved you from head to toe, there was one thing that made Matt stop within seconds.

  "It's about Y/N. She turned off her emotions and we need you to die for her to feel something. It worked on Elena, so we're sure it'll work on her too", Damon stated sternly, making Matt freeze. He inhaled deeply, and turned to face Damon who couldn't hold back a grin, while Elena tried her best to seem friendly and kind and caring towards Matt. But he didn't really buy it - he was trying to live a life without the supernatural messes in it, but for you, he would have done anything.

  They all knew already that Matt would most definitely agree, so without giving a straight answer, he moved on to different matters. "Yeah? Who's we?", he asked, making Damon laugh.

  "Oh, you're just going to love this."

///

  Matt did not love it like Damon told him he would. If anything, he hated to be sitting at the same table with all of the vampires in town, from Damon to Rebekah. Bonnie and Kai had found their way into the mess as well, and it seemed like everyone was included in it, wanting to get you back with equal love towards you, and if you could have cared, you would have been flattered and happy, but instead, you were hanging around somewhere in the woods with the blood of your innocent victims smeared all over your face.

  "Let's go through the damned plan again", Klaus spoke while munching on a slice of pizza with his feet on one of Mystic Grill's tables. The hangout was empty, the closing hours had passed, and it was the perfect place for them to perfect everything before going out to get you, which they indeed would, and the empty place also offered Klaus a great chance to continue his breakdown. Ever since you became a vampire and turned off your emotions, he had felt rather done with the world, like nothing mattered anymore and therefore he let himself go entirely. He was eating greasy fast food, drinking more than usual, snickering like a high school girl and acting more relaxed and chill than ever before. He was the complete opposite of his true self, really.

  That was what losing you did to people.

  Elijah gave his brother a judging glare, but too busy licking his fingers from the pizza toppings, Klaus ignored the clearly displeased look on Elijah's face and continued to eat while expecting to hear one of his fellow Mystic Falls residents to tell the plan like he demanded. Deep sighs were heard from all over, but most of them could relate to the pain Klaus was in, although not all of them suffocated their feelings with extra cheese, but at least Klaus hadn't flipped the switch like you did and that was what mattered the most.

  "We find Y/N, we try to talk some sense into her, and when, not if, but when it fails, we'll kill her dear Matty and she'll flip the switch. And if not, we'll always have plan B...", Katherine smirked, dangling her feet while sitting next to Klaus' feet on the table, her eyes staring down at the notes Caroline had been taking down as the over-enthusiastic control freak she was. Eyes stared at the words scribbled on the paper, and the lot of them nodded in unison, agreeing with the diabolical plan, but although it was crazy, it was guaranteed to work.

  And somewhere, amidst the bunch of people around the booth, they could hear Caroline's speaking up. "I'm sorry my handwriting is so messy!", she pouted, earning many fond chuckles, before they turned their backs on the table and started to flood out of the Grill as one big line, though their ways separated in the dim, chilly night. Some of the vampires jumped on top of the buildings and found their way to you like that, while others roamed through the woods, and one very drunk hybrid transformed into a wolf to jog to you quicker.

  And together, they left behind the papers that said:

  PLAN B: KILL EVERYONE.

///

  "You might want to put this on your finger, single lady", Damon chuckled and offered Matt a wicked smirk while holding up the ring that would be his only way to come back to life. Matt rolled his eyes, and snatched the ring from Damon before the Salvatore nodded over to Kai. It was a surprising duo, but together the two of them turned around at the nearest corner, knowing they'd find you on the other side and this information turned out to be correct - you were indeed under the street lights, fangs deep in some innocent girl but you couldn't care less. Possibly because you didn't care at all.

  Kai and Damon circled you, closing you between the two, and at first you didn't even notice but when one of the two spoke up, you quickly withdrew your teeth from the young woman's neck, blooding dripping from the sharp tips you held against your lower lip while looking around. "Nice going there, sweetie. Dark side looks good on you", Kai was the one to break the thick silence, excluding the last breaths of your victim and your deep gasps as you let the blood slide down your throat, thicker with each forced swallow between inhales.

  Your eyes locked, and Kai could sense the negativity which made him laugh out loud. "Wow, I'm just quivering. Look, baby girl, even if dark side does suit you, you don't belong there. Are you quite finished with this angsty teenager phase yet?", he teased, his cheeky grin irritating you to a point where you took a step towards him, about to give him a taste of your hand, but you had barely moved an inch when a warning tone spoke from behind you, stopping you.

  "Ah, ah, ah, Y/N", Damon's familiar voice interrupted you from attacking Kai. "I wouldn't do that if I were you. See, Kai here, is more of a friend than you. And that should say something", he continued, his eyes glancing at the girl that fell onto the ground, bleeding on the pavement, while his lips pulled up in the infamous smirk of his, revealing pearl white teeth. You growled, knowing what they were trying to do, so without giving in, you shook your head and got ready to leave.

  "I'm out of here. See you, well, hopefully, never", you spat, and adjusted your leather jacket before waving a goodbye to Kai, but before you could sprint away, you heard Damon speak up again and it made you groan but your expression changed entirely when you turned to face him again.

  "I don't think you understood us correctly. Flip it back on", Damon commanded while his hands were holding Matt in a position where he could snap his neck in a blink of an eye, and as much as you wanted to call his bluff, you knew it was Damon and for you, he would have killed almost anyone. You shuffled on your feet uncomfortably, feeling something pang against your heart and mind, aching to break down the walls and let all the emotions flood in, but you tried to fight it.

  "No", you bravely argued, earning an amused chuckle from Kai, but Damon was the sole opposite.

  "Okay, let's try one more time", the Salvatore let out bitter words, the cold air visible as he breathed out, his hands twisting quickly until Matt's lifeless body fell onto the ground with a thud. You inhaled sharply, surprising yourself with the sudden reaction, but you swallowed thickly and fought against the tears and the rush of emotions. But you were on the edge alright, and you could feel your heart about to burst - like someone was banging the door that separated you from your feelings, and it was about to fall apart.

  You had a thick skin though, and a heart made of steel, and therefore you managed to stay strong under the pressure, although you had to admit that the sight of Matt lying dead on the cold ground wasn't one you exactly enjoyed. He had been your friend, if not more, and Damon had ruthlessly snapped his neck in front of your eyes in the hopes of getting you back, and now, all you could imagine was the disappointment in his and Kai's heart. The tragedies in your life had grown you into a warrior, although perhaps the bravest ones wouldn't run away from their feelings, but at least you managed to keep them hidden under a cover from where you never aimed to unleash them.

  But, Damon wasn't quite finished.

  "Oh, love, you look dreadful", you heard a third voice, and you made another spin to the direction of the female speaking, and you were both pleased and displeased to see Rebekah standing at an arm's distance with her hand resting on her hip and her head tilted to the side, the blonde curls falling to her back while a mischievous smirk pulled up her painted lips. "I wonder what you'll look like once we're finished here", she added, and sprinted over to Kai, snapping his neck before going over to Damon and doing the same for him.

  You tensed up, and bit your lower lip harshly, but you were a vampire after all, so you knew a thing or two. "He'll come back to life", you stated the obvious, but your voice was uncertain and shaky. "That won't kill him", you continued, your hands trembling while you leaned against the street lamp, feeling weak suddenly, aware that eventually you'd fall apart and you weren't ready for that. You didn't want to.

  Then, Klaus jumped from the top of one of the buildings surrounding the spot. "No, but this will", he responded with a twisted smirk, and grabbed Damon's limp body to sink his hybrid fangs in his neck, inserting werewolf venom into the Salvatore's system. You knew it would turn out to be fatal at some point, and you were growing restless, watching all of your friends die.

  And there was no end to it.

  Stefan appeared out of nowhere, sinking a silver dagger into Rebekah's chest which led into Klaus biting Stefan as well, which then led into Katherine showing up to snap the hybrid's neck. People kept coming, and deaths kept happening right in front of your eyes and you realized you were losing everyone, and that was too much for you to handle. The barriers you had put up broke open, and emotions flooded in freely, overwhelming you and taking control until you were forced down to your knees as heartbreaking sobs ripped free, echoing through the streets as you cried violently.

  "Stop it, stop killing my friends", you begged, and as you cried, Kol came to comfort you, wrapping his muscular arms around you, bringing you warmth in the chilly night. Your cheeks were pink and the tears were stinging you and the sobs were choking you in a painful loop with no end in sight. You had suffocated your emotions for too long, and the pain had only doubled during your cold days, so this was obviously a challenge to get through.

  And although you were heartbroken, the lot of them still smiled and looked at each other proudly. They had gotten you back successfully, and from now on, they were all going to be there for you, from the beginning to the end, no matter what it was going to take. They all loved you, and you loved them, and luckily none of them really died - except that you felt like you were going to. But, you had your friends behind your back, supporting you until you could stand on your feet by yourself again.

  The good old Y/N was back.