THIS IMAGINE COULD BE TRIGGERING SO PLEASE, IF YOU KNOW THAT IT COULD DRIVE YOU INTO SOMETHING MENTIONED IN THIS, DO NOT READ IT. I LOVE YOU GUYS, AND I REALLY WANT ONLY GOOD THINGS FOR YOU AND I HONESTLY HATE THE THOUGHT OF YOU HURTING YOURSELVES. PLEASE DON'T, IT COULD END BADLY, YOU ARE LOVED AND BEAUTIFUL AND AMAZING. I LOVE YOU.

okay, now that that's written, just a quick note for you guys (: i was asked to do imagines about stuff like self-harming, panic attacks, suicidal thoughts and things like these because the truth is, there are many people who have to deal with some of them, so i just had to agree. i think it's a good idea, but like i already said, please don't read anything that could be triggering for you !! i love you all, so very much, you're the best readers ever and i don't want anything bad for you.

i also want to apologize in advance if any of the things i write about have some mistakes or incorrect facts or information or anything like that, please let me know if there is something i need to correct ! i try to google a lot if there's something i'm not sure about, but google isn't always right, nor the best option, but anyway... here's the imagine, please, READ WITH CAUTION ! (:

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Imagine harming yourself and after finding out about it, Elijah wants to help

"I'm okay."

God, if only you could say how many times you had told that to the people surrounding you, thinking their presence was enough to keep you happy. But you weren't sure if you could even count that far. And though you had said it millions of times, you almost never meant it. It was almost funny, really, but it managed to stay on the side of sad.

You did have a lot of people around you, but they were always too busy to notice the sadness in your eyes, or the way you kept wearing long-sleeved shirts and avoiding shorts and dresses, or how you were always missing that happy smile and bubbly laughter you knew you once had. How did you lose it?

It was quite simple, really. Feeling unsatisfied with your own life and your own body was enough to drive you to things you didn't think you would even dare to consider, and cross a line to a darker side - a side which you were sure had no exit. Often, too often, you found yourself standing in a bathroom, perhaps a local one or your own, where you took out your blade which was sadly almost always with you, and slid it across your skin, usually wrist, but you had done so many cuts you had already reached your arm. Sometimes you'd cut your thighs, and that was why you didn't wear shorts or skirts or anything that would give away even a peek of your skin.

Doing it, harming yourself, it made you feel somewhat better, for a few seconds maybe. Then you'd return to your own, sad self, until your hand would reach the blade again and repeat what you were used to do, for months now. You kind of hated the fact that you harmed yourself like that, but you were too addicted to stop and there was no one to help you, either. And you, you were too weak to get help by yourself. So you wounded yourself nearly each day, waiting for someone to find you and save you from yourself, but so far, it seemed like you were only allowed to fall deeper into darkness.

But you didn't know, that you were being watched over by someone very special. You could never have imagined that you'd spark the interest of an Original vampire, and still didn't, but you had in fact caught Elijah Mikaelson's attention and he was very deeply falling for you. He thought you looked beautiful, even with the fake, miserable smile painted on your lips and even with your eyes losing the happiness in them. And he had already decided to find out what was heaving down your heart, and do whatever it would take, to make you smile genuinely again, and help you if that was necessary.

Some could have called it creepy, since he was pretty much following you and looking at you whenever he spotted you, but he was worried. He was sincerely concerned, and fallen in love too, and he hated to see you break in front of all your friends who couldn't see you the way he did. He could sense that something, everything was wrong, and he didn't want you to do anything bad. He was a bit too late, though, because you were already cutting yourself, but he wasn't stupid, not at all.

He could see the way you were always tugging down your already long sleeves, or wearing bracelets or something to cover up your wrists and arms. He could see how you were clearly uncomfortable with anyone or anything being in contact with your skin or too close to you, and once, he had even caught a red lingering mark on your flesh, but he hadn't approached you. Not yet.

Though on one day, he thought it would be a good time to meet you for the first time, officially. You were sitting in Mystic Grill all alone, when he walked to your table, and asked for the permission to sit down. You were surprised, shocked even, but allowed him to take a seat, although it made you uncomfortable because you were very shy when it came to handsome, charming men like him, and honestly, you thought that whenever someone like him talked to you, he was being challenged to do it or just joking.

"My name is Elijah Mikaelson. You must be Y/N Y/LN. I have caught your name a couple of times from your friends", he spoke softly, his voice sending shivers down your spine and making your knees wobble as you slowly nodded. He and you talked for a while, although it was mostly just him introducing himself shortly, and asking questions to which you replied as quietly, simply and shortly as possible. It was pretty much just him talking, but you didn't mind listening to his hypnotizing, smooth voice. It was calming too, and for the first time in forever, you felt relaxed and enjoyed someone's company.

When he said he had to leave, he got up and so did you to shake his hand swiftly before he'd flee the Grill. After he had told you how nice it was to meet you - causing you to blush and frankly feel suspicious - he got ready to leave, but before he did he leaned over to your ear.

"I do not know what or who has driven you into feeling so awful you feel the need to hurt yourself, but if you're looking for a sign to not do it today, this is it. I am aware that we barely know each other, but you are beautiful, and lovely, and I give you my word that I will help you and make you feel loved like you deserve to", he slowly, quietly explained. Your eyes closed, and you listened to him speak, his words managing to make you feel like crying, but it was good, comforting, just what you needed.

When you opened your eyes, he was already gone, but even though you walked to your house all alone, and got ready for bed alone, and slept all alone, you didn't feel sad.

And that night, you didn't make a cut, either.

///

You and Elijah slowly got to know each other better, and even though it was quite the challenge, he eventually made you feel comfortable enough to talk back to him. You weren't so quiet anymore, not around him at least, and he had succeeded to make you smile at least twice. He was funny, yet sophisticated and he would read to you, draw for you, show his cooking skills and cuddle you to sleep. He didn't want to push you anything, and that was why you didn't really define your relationship, but you liked to think that you were dating.

He did love you, and although you didn't think you'd be able to dig up such feelings from yourself, you did love him too.

Whenever Elijah couldn't be around, he left little notes all around the house to make sure you were alright and would be until he'd arrive. He was spending a lot of time at your place, and often he stayed through the night but you didn't mind. It wasn't like you had anyone else to be there with you. He did make your days better, just like his cute notes did. Sometimes he wrote a long explanation, why he cared about you so much and sometimes the note would run out of space and he'd have to put two of them together, but sometimes all you found was a note stuck to your wall or the bottom of your shoe with a heart or a smiley face.

Elijah was really the best.

But even with his notes all over the house, he couldn't always keep you safe. He had put you in a good mood, and you went out on a sunny Friday, just to enjoy the warmth of the sun. You were having a fantastic day, and it honestly surprised you how happy and loved you felt, but it wasn't hard to pop that bubble. Some guy yelled at you from the other side of the street, things so awful you immediately ran home in tears, and understood that even if there was one special person like Elijah, there was a dozen horrible ones waiting for you, to make you feel worthless and ugly and stupid and horrible again.

You didn't think you'd have to do it, you thought you were going to a happier direction all thanks to Elijah, but you did somehow find your way to your bathroom, where you looked at yourself from the mirror like you were used to do. And your hand found a blade, although you had convinced Elijah you threw every one of them out, but there it was. Now between your fingers, aching to be in contact with your wrist with pink fading cuts. One quick movement was all it took to create a new, fresh, red one that started to bleed.

You moaned out, in pain or slight pleasure, you didn't know. It had been days, maybe even a week without you harming yourself and the feeling was strong and overwhelming now when it had been a while. Your eyes started to blur up because of the tears, and you felt dizzy as you looked at your wrists. You made a new cut, then another and another until you collapsed to the floor with a thud and faced darkness.

///

"Y/N? Please wake up, Y/N! You have to drink it, drink my blood. Y/N, please, I need you. I can't let you go, not like this. Open your eyes, your gorgeous eyes and look at me. You will be fine..."

Elijah's voice reached your ears, and you felt consciousness take you over. You listened to his words, but didn't answer, instead you moved your lips on the wrist he was pressing against your mouth. You tasted blood on your tongue, and although it was bad, it was also somewhat good and you drank as Elijah breathed out in relief. When you felt alright, you let go, opened your eyes and looked at Elijah who was holding you, your head on his lap.

"Fuck", he panted, surprising you with the word, but you didn't say anything. You looked at him as he let his head fall back, and he laughed in relief and happiness for a moment before holding you up and hugging you tightly.

"I'm so in love with you, Y/N. Why did you do it again? Please promise me you won't, ever again. I need you too much to let you go. I can't see you in pain, my love. Please accept my loving", he rambled. You still kept quiet, you just pressed your head against his chest and let him rock back and forth soothingly, making your body move with his.

"You are my everything, Y/N. I want to help you. Please, just, let me. I know it isn't easy, and it will take some time, but I will be here for you through it all. I love you", Elijah continued, and kissed the top of your head. You smiled weakly, and glanced at your wrists which were both healed by Elijah's blood.

"I love you too", you mumbled, making him smile, genuinely, just like you did, finally.

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if any of you need help to deal with things like harming yourself, please talk to your family or friends and/or contact someone who can help !! i know i am definitely not the right person, but if you just want to talk to someone and don't know who else to go to, then message me, i promise it won't be weird or awkward, even if you have never before spoken to me because i love you all, and i will be your friend if you need one. (: have a lovely day, all of you !