I was about to knock on Baochen's door in Baling. I hoped he was home. How did I get there?

1 week before:

I took advantage of my presence in YunShen Buzhi, between two night hunts, to lead the morning reading with the disciples. I was about to go to the library when Brother sent for me. I joined him, wondering what the emergency was. There was no summit scheduled for another two months and the spiritual forces were relatively quiet.

I had heard, however, of a messenger from the western territories. I knocked on the door of Brother's study. I heard his voice telling me to come in. As soon as I stepped in, I realized that he was not alone, Uncle was with him. I greeted them and approached. Brother didn't look like his normal self. He seemed upset. As for Uncle, he had the same stern look on his face that he always had in my presence.

Brother went to sit at his desk. He motioned for me to take a seat across from him. I nodded my head in denial. I preferred to stand. Uncle sighed in exasperation and spoke up.

"Wangji, the reason we called you here was to talk about your future. As you know, you and Xichen are the last members of our lineage. Both of you have reached an age where you must think about finding a partner to give legitimate heirs to the Lan clan. "

"Uncle, Wangji already has a child, SiZhui," said Brother. Uncle turned to me.

"Although I recognize that you are raising your son very well and that he is nice, SiZhui is an illegitimate child. You were not officially married to his mother! Besides, we still don't know who she is or if she is still alive! You never said anything about it! "

"Uncle, as far as I know, SiZhui's mother died when he was a baby and he was raised by a nanny. "

"Well, you know more than I do, it seems. That said, both of you have to think about the future of the clan and ensure the descendants of the family... A messenger arrived early this morning from the western lands. One of the clans is led by a friend of mine from my youth. He has a daughter of marriageable age. She is said to be beautiful and respectful. Their sect has the same principles of life as those of the Lan clan... For political reasons, it would be better for Xichen to join one of the big clans of our territory. But it would also be wise to create links with other lands. Although we are at peace, we are not safe from the warlike madness, that's why, it would be good, that you think about this union, Wangji! " .

I saw him coming. Did he really think that I would accept "that"? Did he think that a woman could take the place of my love in my heart and in my bed, however beautiful she was? I understood Brother's discomfort better. He knew my feelings for Wei Ying!

My expressionless face was complemented by a look of ice.

"I'm not asking you for an immediate answer, but it would be nice if you made a decision soon. Many unions within the clans are arranged marriages based on power struggles and we need to establish our power. "

"Uncle, ... "Brother began.

"No!" I turned and left.

"Lan Wangji, I didn't give you permission to leave the room, are you forgetting your duties as the heir of the Lan clan? "Uncle said.

I turned around slowly and looked him straight in the eye.

"Then I am no longer a Lan and I no longer belong to this clan.

I left Brother's workroom without saying anything more. I returned to the Jingshi and started to pack my things to leave YunShen Buzhi.

I didn't know what I was going to do, or where I could go, but never again would anyone make decisions for me or run my life. This time he had gone too far!

I was writing a message to ask SiZhui to come to the clearing. I had to explain my departure and the possible repercussions for him. I didn't have to. He and Brother entered the Jingshi. Brother glanced at my bag.

"Wangji, you weren't serious, you're not going to leave permanently? You're not going to ... leave the clan? "

I put my brush down.

"If he insists on running my life, I have no choice.

"Wangji, if you leave the clan, you cannot return! Think about it! Think about your son!"

"No Father, think of yourself for once! I don't know what Master Qi Ren did, but if you consider that you should not submit don't do it! "

"SiZhui," said Brother, "your father can't leave like this on a whim. Wangji think of your honor! "

"Mine or the Clan's? "

"What do you mean? "

"My virtue, my righteousness, everyone knows that I do not tolerate injustice and deceit. Uncle "educated" me so well that he made me a farmer with integrity, perfect and infallible behavior. If the rumor of my departure from our sect spreads, how do you think the clans will react? What doubts will arise in their minds? Who do you think will be the one whose honor will be called into question? "

"Wangji, I can't believe what I'm hearing! "

"Yet you know that I have not forgiven. Take my words back to Uncle. For now, I agree to defer my decision to leave the clan out of respect for you. But I am leaving YunShen Buzhi. I give Uncle one year to come to terms with it. Either he agrees to stop controlling my life or I leave the clan permanently. I will not go back on my decision.

Forgive me Brother, I know I am putting you in an unpleasant situation, but I will never submit again.

"Very well, I will pass on your message and I will bring you his answer if there is one! "

"I won't be here anymore. I am saying goodbye to SiZhui and leaving. We will meet again in a year, Brother.

I saw him swallow. I knew I was hurting him, hurting him. But I couldn't take it anymore. I had been locked in a straitjacket of rules all my life, I needed freedom, even if it was only a year!

Her shoulders lowered and I saw tears held in her eyes.

"Take care of yourself. Do you know where you're going? Or could I contact you? "

"I don't know yet. When I have an idea, I'll let you know.

Brother came to me and hugged me. The last time he had done this was when I came out of the cold cave. That day I didn't return his embrace because of my resentment. Today it was different. I hugged him back. We said goodbye and he left to join Uncle. I turned to SiZhui.

"Don't think I'm going to leave you. I will come back for a day after every full moon to check on your learning progress. Join your uncle Xichen's Qin class. You now have a good basis for the murder rope. But I forbid you to use it while I am away! And remember, don't tell anyone about what I taught you with the sword. SiZhui nodded.

"Father, don't you know where you are going? Really? ".

"I may have an idea, but nothing is sure yet. I don't know if the person I'm thinking of will agree to give me hospitality. We will meet again at the next full moon. Use the Jingshi in my absence. No one should suspect that I will come back here regularly. Do you understand me? "

"Yes Father, I wish you a safe journey and will look forward to the next full moon to show you my progress." I took him in my arms and hugged him tightly.

"Goodbye, my son.

"Goodbye, Father.

I took my bag and left YunShen Buzhi. My rebellion against my uncle and my clan was complete and there was no turning back. There was only one way left, to go forward and not look back!

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