Time passed in nonlinear fashion — minutes became hours and vice versa. Nothing made sense as the events in the council chambers dug its talons into Kanden's heart, clawing and tearing until everything became a jumbled blur. The only thing he knew was Ryker's warm embrace and his fingers tracing soothing tracks through his hair.

Sometime during the haze, his boyfriend asked, "Is there anything I can do? What are you thinking?"

Kanden shook his head, still too distressed to utter more than two syllables. In the beginning, the entire story, excluding the part about being trapped underground for the rest of their foreseeable future — poured out like blood from a gaping wound. He'd wanted to tell him, but couldn't, because his gut told him to keep the information to himself for the time being.

For now, the only thing he understood was that Mother had been killed for no other reason than seeking a merciful solution to save Father from himself. She was smart like that, always considering the potential outcome and basing her decisions on the possibilities. Why she'd stopped him, Kanden couldn't say except to stop Father from crossing a line he could never return from.

"No," he whispered, curling into Ryker's side, clinging to him as if the man were his only tangible lifeline to the reality he found himself in.

Bringing him closer, Ryker kissed the crown of Kanden's head. "God, I was awful; your parents were innocent this whole time. I'm sorry. Fuck, I'm so sorry."

Tears continued to spill, unwilling to halt their assault long after a headache had set in. Kanden squeezed Ryker closer and stated in a firm tone that betrayed his broken heart, "It's not your fault. You put all the pieces together. The council was guilty, even if my parents weren't involved. I needed to find the truth; I needed to know."

"But at what cost?"

A terrible, awful price had been paid for that information. But no matter what happened, Kanden could rest peacefully in the knowledge his mother had loved him. That despite his taciturn nature, Father had lied for his sake. Mother would have been murdered, regardless of Kanden's presence. At least he wouldn't question her motives; however, it wasn't much comfort.

They lay together, wrapped in each other's arms with Kanden unable to provide an answer. Ryker didn't push; a fact for which the former was grateful.

Trembling and in need of a subject change, he grazed Ryker's arm and asked, "How are you feeling?"

The other man sighed, raising Kanden with his chest, thrumming a steady heartbeat into his ear. The motion was always a comfort in good and bad times alike, knowing they were together and alive. "Little weak, I guess, but better. The buckwheat was terrible."

Kanden smirked at the weak attempt to lighten the mood; it really had been awful despite Rumi's best efforts. His smile quickly faded though as he thought of his own mother and all the little things she'd never do for him again. No more hugs mixed with the scent of herb, no patient or kind words for every occasion, and no easy banter that always passed between them.

His heart clenched, refusing to accept the truth as tears stained his cheeks once again, clumping his eyelashes together. "I can't believe this is real," he rasped, clutching the fabric of Ryker's tunic. "I keep seeing what Sabre did over and over — all that blood slowly growing, Father's shock—"

The words faded as his mind fixated on Father's horrified eyes once the realization of the events had set in. He'd been so close to murdering Chancellor Helix, but had stopped simply because she'd asked nicely. The way he'd taken the slap of his life, her hateful insults, and affectionately touched her while she'd been distressed — how he'd defended her honor and by extension, Kanden's, or how he'd flown into a blind rage the moment they'd hurt her — all because Mother had meant the world to him.

For the first time in nineteen years, Kanden finally comprehended that love after two decades of observing a mask of stone. His chest tightened more until breathing hurt, to realize Mother had died believing her husband hadn't loved her. All because he'd buried his emotions in a chasm of pride.

"It hurts," he whispered, shedding more tears and tightening his fist.

"I know," Ryker replied softly, "I know. My dad's death was nothing like this, but the pain will always cut deep. I can't begin to imagine how horrific that was to witness. I'm so sorry." He planted another kiss on Kanden's forehead. "I love you. I'll tell you that every day for the rest of our lives, and I'm here in any way you need me."

Until you leave me too.

Kanden couldn't help thinking it, but Ryker wouldn't be safe of anyone suspected he knew the truth. The same went for Marina, and he suddenly feared for both their safety. "Do you think they suspect you and Marina know the truth?"

The question terrified him as much as the potential answer, but he had to ask. He couldn't bear to lose anyone else.

Ryker took his time to reply before drawing his words out. "Doesn't matter. With Sabre and Ivarra's deaths, as well as Chancellor Helix's arrest, people will rightfully want answers. There's no way the council can hide that murder or the conspiracy. No matter what anyone feels about Bastion or the Chancellor, your mother was well-liked and respected. They won't accept anything less than the truth."

There was no doubt anger would erupt among the citizens. They'd been purposely poisoned with the intent to deceive. The majority of the council had willfully led everyone to believe a crafted falsehood while they sought to benefit themselves. If they discovered the truth about their larger predicament, a situation so monumental, it crushed Kanden's shoulders with the weight of the mountain, riots would overtake the Undergrounders until everyone died and dissolved to dust. No one would be left to lead humanity to the Overland.

Kanden didn't reply as he rolled onto his back and stared at the nondescript ceiling. So much of this tragedy could have been avoided if the elite and Founding Families hadn't created a rift between the people. If the Council hadn't murdered everyone by poisoning their rations.

Then, Kanden suddenly recalled something important, an event that had seemed innocuous at the time because he'd been too annoyed to think anything of it. Closing his eyes, he covered his face in his hands. "Oh, gods, it was me," he blurted.

Shifting beside him, Ryker asked, "What do you mean?"

No, no, no... This was what the Chancellor had meant by intending Kanden to receive the poison instead of Ryker.

Too ashamed and nauseous to look at his boyfriend, he groaned and spoke in a muffled voice through his fingers. "Ration day. Sabre added that extra herbal tea to my bag. I gave that to you, remember? And there were those extra vegetables too. I discreetly distributed them to families with small children so they wouldn't go hungry. I killed them..."

His breath hitched as the realization sank in he was no better than anyone else among the elites. Enjoying meals from Mother and Rumi, Kanden hadn't needed his portions. Not wanting them to go to waste, he'd stupidly ensured other people received them without anyone discovering their secret benefactor. Instead of doing good with his intentions, he'd been their tool to drive along the illness and murder everyone.

"Fuck, I murdered all those people," he whispered. "It's my fault so many died."

"Hey, none of that," Ryker insisted, peeling Kanden's hands away. Affection gleamed from his dark eyes, bearing no hint of contempt or blame. "The Council poisoned the food; not you. How were you supposed to know what it contained?"

"But if I hadn't given out those rations—"

"You'd be dead in everyone else's place," Ryker finished. Caressing Kanden's cheek, he added, "This was not your fault. I used that tea in the infirmary, so I guess that means I killed people too, but the true culprits lie within the governing body. They used us to further their agenda. The blame lies solely on them."

No good deed goes unpunished. Whoever had come up with that saying in the Old World had been wise. In the end, the innocent suffered at the hands of the wicked.

He didn't want to think about the logic of Ryker's words or the irony of his own good intentions. None of it mattered anyway.

The minutes ticked away into immeasurable time until they drifted off in each other's arms. When he awoke again, banging from the front room carried through the bedroom door.

Ryker snorted and raised his head. "What in the world?"

Stretching, Kanden crawled out of the bed and yawned. "I barred the door when I fled the tunnels," he explained, arching his back until it popped. "Probably Rumi wanting access."

Ryker shuffled beside him, groaning as he used the wall for support. When Kanden spun around to check on him, the former waved him off. "Just a little unsteady," he managed in an optimistic tone. The tired cases below his eyes, giant cheeks, and frail frame said otherwise, but he seemed determined not to let his condition get to him. "I really need to pee, and I haven't washed in days. I'll be okay."

Fair. Kanden would never say it, but his boyfriend reeked.

"Want a sponge bath?" he teased, grinning at the sudden interest sparking behind Ryker's eyes.

"I could break the rules and shower with you at your quarters."

Father would literally shit a mountain if that happened.

Feeling rebellious and needing a happy moment more than ever, Kanden grinned. "Why not? We haven't had sex in awhile. It'll give me an excuse to put my hands all over you."

And forget. He couldn't bear to dwell on anything else right now, and he'd take anything to cease the horrific images in his mind.

The banging continued — much too hard for Rumi's frail hands to make that racket.

Trading bewildered glasses, Ryker lumbered toward the door with labored breathing. "Who is it?"

"It's Zephyr," called the other voice. "Let me in!"

Rolling his eyes, Ryker groaned. "What do you want?"

"Can we not do this," Kanden mumbled, anticipating what was sure to be an unpleasant conversation between the two men. For reasons he didn't understand, those two had never liked each other, but kept things civil for his sake. Zephyr rarely voiced his complaints, but Ryker never made his disdain a secret.

Ryker pressed his forehead against the wall and sighed. "I don't have energy for him today."

"Ryker, it's important," Zephyr insisted. "I'm not here for a social call."

Unlatching the bolt, Ryker opened the door an inch while barring the entrance. "Oh, so you're saying you haven't slept your way through the entire population yet? Pity. I'd have been honored."

Kanden scowled and crossed his arms. "That was rude. Let him in. He's probably here for me." He wouldn't say it, but Zeph would go celibate before he touched Ryker.

With a huff, Ryker stood back and waved the guard inside before shutting the door and locking it again. "Okay, you're here. Hurry up and say your peace so you can leave."

Hostility dripped from his voice as he ignored Kanden's pleading glance to be civil. Ryker tended to avoid confrontation and pretend Zephyr didn't exist, but in his home, the pleasantries went out the window.

Not taking the bait, Zephyr turned to Kanden, watching him with wide eyes and downturned lips. His chest heaved as if he'd run the entire length of every tunnel just to get here. "Your father sent me. It's— oh, gods, it's bad. Your mother, she—"

Kanden closed his eyes. He'd expected someone to break the news sooner or later and pop the protective bubble he'd created to block the trauma. Drawing a shuddering breath, he finished Zephyr's statement. "I already know," he whispered.

"How could you," he gasped. "The bodies were brought to the square an hour ago. I looked for you, but you weren't there. The sentries at the conservatory said they'd seen you running, but..." He paused as realization settled behind his dark eyes. "Oh. You were there, weren't you?"

Kanden shrugged. "Not really," he hedged. "It's complicated, but I know what happened. Sabre murdered her in cold blood." He choked on the last two words and sniffed, seeing blood everywhere, slowly forming an ever growing pool of crimson liquid.

He didn't elaborate; he'd only incriminate himself and the less Zephyr knew, the better. If Helix convinced the people to spare his life, the young enforcer didn't stand a chance against a powerful man who wanted to silence the truth.

Muttering a curse under his breath, Zephyr took Kanden's arm and tugged him toward the door. "We need to go."

"Where?" Kanden extracted himself from his friend's grasp and flapped his arms, gesticulating at the walls surrounding them. "We are buried who knows how deep inside a mountain. It's not like we have a secret hideout."

"You do," Zephyr interjected, reaching for Kanden again. "Trust me, you can't be here when the people come looking for you."

"What do you mean?" Ryker asked, dropping the aggressive tone as he slumped against the wall and dropped his hands by his side. "What does Kanden have to do with anything? He's not a threat to anyone."

Raking his hands through his hair, Zephyr whirled in a full circle before expelling a sharp breath. "It's bad. The people are rioting in the square—attacking enforcers and demanding justice. They're attacking Founding Families and their children."

"But Kanden had nothing to do with their actions," Ryker pointed out, rubbing a hand over his face. "If anything, he was always the one trying to help the lower classes. He sympathized with us. And what about the children? Some of them are barely old enough to walk."

Zephyr shook his head and pursed his lips. "Doesn't matter," he murmured. "No one is thinking clearly. Ivarra's death was shocking, but Sabre's head was completely bashed in. Everyone knows Bastion has a temper. They all see him carry about the death penalty with no emotion. Helix didn't stand a chance once Arlo testified. He's..." Zephyr grimaced. "Ugh, it was gruesome. That's all I can say. Arlo is from a middle-class family, and so far, the citizens have been sympathetic, but Bastion is one of the Founding Members of the Underground. They want the entire family eliminated for the Council's crimes. They've already killed some of their families, dragging them from the quarters and beating them to death with no explanation. These people are beyond reason."

"What about Ryker?" Kanden asked in a small voice, resigned to his own fate. "Will it be enough to kill me, or will they come after him too?"

Zephyr offered a grim smile as he shook his head once more. "No. Ryker's family is working class, and he's a victim of the poisoning. As long as you aren't here when the mob comes looking for you, he will be fine. He can claim innocence and be none the wiser. In fact..." He faced Ryker and met his gaze head on. "If you want to protect yourself and your mother — if you want to give Kanden a shot at survival, you need to lie and tell them you haven't seen or heard anything. If you love him as much as you say you do, you need to feign ignorance. Be outraged if you like, but the moment they think you're lying, it's over."

Every ounce of strength left in Ryker's body seemed to desert him, and he slid down the wall to the floor, covering his face in his hands. "This is wrong." He sniffed loudly before gripping his hair. "Innocent people are being murdered, and you want me to go along with it and pretend this is okay."

Kanden knelt in front of him and grabbed Ryker's hands. Shattered irises stared back at him when the other man lifted his head as a tear dripped from the corner of his eye. Blinking away the urge to join his boyfriend, Kanden said, "Not wrong. You're doing what needs to be done to survive. I know the truth — you know it. But no one cares about that right now. Do whatever it takes to protect yourself and Rumi. I couldn't bear anything happening because of our association."

Carefully opening the door, Zephyr peered outside, where a low rumble of distorted shouts and chaos echoed inside the caverns. "We need to go before they make it here," he murmured. "There's not much time."

He dragged Kanden into the tunnels, giving him no time except to utter a hurried goodbye as he stumbled behind Zephyr. His best friend didn't release him this time, and he sped forward into the dark passageways leading away from the main square and toward long-abandoned mine shafts.

"Where are we going?"

"I told you," Zeph explained without missing a beat, "your father has a place to hide in case of emergencies. All the Founding Families have one. Council members have a shared space, but these hideouts were created with these scenarios in mind."

What about the rest of humanity? Why didn't they matter? No one should be so important that their safety came before everyone else's. Those who went in the space arks had done the same, too; they'd gathered those they deemed more important while leaving everyone else to die.

"Will you be safe?" Kanden asked, stopping his friend short. "What will happen to everyone else?"

Shadows his Zephyr's eyes as he ducked his head and chewed his bottom lip. After a moment, he lifted his shoulder in a half-hearted shrug. "I can't promise anything. We're underground and barely surviving. Whatever this is," he elaborated, spreading his arms and shaking his head, "isn't living. Part of me understands where the people are coming from, but I have to hope we have something better worth fighting for. Otherwise, what's the point?"

According to the Council, there was no point. They had no way above ground, and the people were literally in the dark about their fates. Maybe it was better this way — not knowing their lives meant nothing. But for their sake, Kanden had to pray for a solution.

When neither said anything, Zephyr moved forward again, keeping Kanden's hand locked in his. It wasn't until they reached a fork between corridors branching in three directions, that he halted, swiveling his head to his right.

Angry shouts thundered against the walls, growing louder as the noise came closer. Footsteps soon joined the voices, and Zephyr released Kanden to grab his baton and take a defensive stance. "I had really hoped to avoid this," he muttered, staring in the direction of the encroaching mob. "When I say go, I want you to take the left fork and run all the way to the shaft at the end. An entrance is half buried behind rock, and you can hide there. If I don't return, Bastion will find it and lead you the rest of the way."

After what Kanden had witnessed through the vents, Father didn't seem to be a much better option. There was no telling how he'd react, and Kanden didn't feel any safer hiding from the mob.

So instead of preparing to run, he stood slightly behind his best friend and squared his shoulders, planting his feet shoulder-width apart. He wouldn't be able to defend himself, but he refused to leave Zephyr on his own. "Ride or die," he mumbled, unsure where he'd read that in one of Ryker's many books. All he recalled was that it was a term used among friends facing their potential demise. Or maybe it was a battle term? Oh well. It was fitting. "I'm not going anywhere without you, so try to keep us alive."

Zephyr turned to him with a grin and patted him on the back. "I like your style. Though I should warn you Bastion will kill me if you get hurt."

Eh. They were doomed anyway. "More motivation to win."

Zephyr withdrew a knife from his boot and passed it to him. "Can't say it'll do much, but it's better than nothing."

Right. Pointy end and all that. Gripping the handle as tight as he could, Kanden waited as the mob rounded the corner and ran toward the pair armed with only a stick and a small blade.