Chapter 36: SCP-3008 "A Perfectly Normal, Regular Old IKEA"

Here we see Miia, your homestays, and you at Bobby's house and you explained everything to Bobby, Crowley, Castiel, and the Winchester brothers.

Bobby: "So you have no idea where your body is?"

(Y/N): "It could be in another galaxy or another universe."

Dean: "Awesome."

Crowley: "Have you checked in the halls of The IKEA."

Miia: "A swedish furniture store, why would his body be there?"

Crowley: "I don't, but it doesn't hurt to look you know."

Ceara: "There's an IKEA nearby, we can look there."

Crowley: "That's not the IKEA I'm referring to you know."

Dean: "Oh hell no."

Mero: "What is it Dean?"

Dean: "SCP-3008 is and we're using quotes here."

Castiel: "A Perfectly Normal, Regular Old IKEA."

Miia: "What's so bad about that?"

Sam: "It's an infinite space in the store."

Dean: "And the employees there are faceless monsters."

Bobby: "And you know how you get lost in IKEA? Well all the exits out of that place don't stay in one spot for so long."

(Y/N): "To make it more difficult at night, the monsters attack you and their body parts and corpses are like homing beacons."

Castiel: "There are colonies of people from different universes living there as well and their tribes are named after aisles and sections."

Miia: How are we gonna navigate that place?

Bobby heads to his desk and then pulls out a drawer and takes out a yellow and blue compass that is handmade.

Bobby: "(Y/N) made this compass to go in and out of 3008, with this you're never lost."

Dean: "Which is why (Y/N) has so many corpses of the staff from that place."

Bobby: "Which smells very bad."

Dean: "Yeah, and he has a bunch of those things in his basement of his old mansion."

Crowley: "We got a compass, now we need some things to defend ourselves other than our fists."*to the demihumans*"We don't want to ruin your manicures now would we?"*gets tail smacked by Miia*"Ow!"

Miia: "Not the time!"

(Y/N): "Alright, let's gear up."*to Bobby*"Do you have my old stuff?"

Later, we see Bobby open up a garage filled with all of your weapons as you and the others see that there's a weapon for everything  including God.

Bobby: "I haven't touched them as a memorial for ya (Y/N)."

(Y/N): "Lets get my body back."

We see you and the others load up the weapons in your Supernatural Tank and close up the trunk. Later, we see Dean  drive the tank all the way to the site containing SCP-3008. You told everything that happened to you to Dr. Bright.

Dr. Bright: "Oh man that's awful."

(Y/N): "Yeah, we have to know if my body is in SCP-3008."

Dr. Bright: "Do you have your special compass?"

Bobby: *pulls out your IKEA compass*"Got it right here."

Dr. Bright: "Alright, we're letting you guys have full access to the store."

Bobby: "Thank you lunatic."

Miia: "And that's gonna guide us to wherever (Y/N)'s body is?"

Bobby: "Not really, it just helps you navigate the SCP, not find (Y/N)'s body."

Miia: "Okay, and how is this gonna help us?"

Dean: "Everyone in 3008-1 got lost in there are from different universes, the compass points to the direction of where the door to our universe is in there."

Miia: "Oh."

Later, we see you and the others armed to the teeth with the exception of you since you're a ghost.

(Y/N): "Okay everyone ready?"

Bobby: "Armed and ready."

(Y/N): "Alright, let's go in."

You and the others then head into SCP-3008 and find yourselves in the halls of an Infinite IKEA. Papi then turns around to see the exit disappear.

Papi: "Where's the exit?!"

Bobby: "It's gone, but don't worry the compass can find the door back to our universe."

Papi: " Okay."

Rachnera then sees a bunch of SCP-3008-2 instances in a docile state of being.

Rachnera: "They seem very docile to me."

Bobby: "Not for long, when closing time arrives they go wild and try to kill you."

Rachnera: "Yikes, that's awful."

You see a settlement that is called Aisle 13.

(Y/N): "There's a settlement in Aisle 13, they will give us shelter."

Cerea: " Good to know."

Later, we see you and the others arriving in Aisle 13 and you explained everything to the settlers of the settlement.

Rachnera: "That's the whole story."*sees Bobby writing in a IKEA brand journal*"What are you writing in the book?"

Bobby: "There's like an infinite amount of universes that this place is connected to, it could be days, months, or years to get back to our world."

(Y/N): "He's right, it took me 10 years to get back to our universe even with the compass."

Suu: "Suu."

Bobby: "I'm sure we'll find our door again by next week or next month."

Miia: "Month?!"

(Y/N): "Yeah."

Settler: "I wish I had a compass that leads me back to my home and back to my 40 demihuman wives."

Ceara: "Demihuman marriage has not been legal yet, as far as I know."

Settler: "Really, cause we actually made brothels for all the demi human species-"

(Y/N): "Shut up or I'll possess you and take your body to the staff."

Dean: "Hey let him finish."

Sam: "Really Dean?"

Dean: "Hey these people are from different universes, we have to take notes of them."

Settler: "Anyways, they made the Interspecies Sexual Exchange Act 3 years ago about humans having more than one demihuman wife and we have brothels for humans to pick out their monsters. Pure breed humans are a rarity of where I'm from, heck I'm part dullahan and part human."

You and the demihumans were disgusted about the universe where the settler is from.

Miia: "Ugh, that's disgusting."

Rachnera: "I may be into BDSM but even I have standards."

Dean: "Okay, I made a mistake about having him explain his universe can I kill him?"

(Y/N): "Let the staff kill him."

Dean: "Alright."

Dean then grabs the settler and tosses him out in the open and when night fall arrives two of the Staff turn to the settler.

SCP-3008-2s: "The store is now closed, please exit the building."

Settler: "AAAHHH!!!!"

We see the settler get killed by the staff as we see his head being thrown into Lala's hands as she looks at it.

Lala: "May his soul go to Hell."

Crowley: "I'll make sure to give him the worst tortures of all time, both psychological and physical."

Dean then picks up a fire axe and then does a test swing.

Dean: "You know I'm keeping this axe cause (Y/N) wants one of these as a souvenir of our time here."

(Y/N): "Thanks Dean."

Papi: "So where the door to our universe would be?"

(Y/N): "Don't know, it could take weeks or years."

Miia: "Years!?"

Bobby: "As long as we stick together, we'll be alright."

Meanwhile, in Remnant, we see you and Sienna in Vale disguised as Atlas soldiers and you both are investigating a crime scene in the library and you both are talking to a police officer.

Soulless (Y/N): "Excuse me sir."*pulls out the fake Atlas officer ID*"Officers of Atlas, I'm Vincent Frost and this is my partner Mana Bella, we're here for the murder case of a faunus here."

Officer: "Don't Atlas officers have better things to do than a murder case like this, especially faunus cases. Most officers just call faunus cases cold cases."

Soulless (Y/N): "I see, then you wouldn't mind if we report insubordination to General Ironwood about one of Vale's officers not doing a case due to your racism towards Faunus."

Officer: "Say what?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Times are changing, nowadays we see couples like those two."

You point to a couple between a lesbian faunus and a lesbian human eating a spagetti for thier dinner date as the officer sees them and turns back to you and gulps in fear.

Officer: "It's all yours."

Soulless (Y/N): "Thank you sir."

We see the officer run away in fear and then run into a pole and then get up and run away to his car as Sienna was impressed by your persuasion.

Sienna: "Very impressive persuasion sweetie."

Soulless (Y/N): "Gonna sound like their boss to get to places."

You and Sienna then head into the library which is called Tuckson's book trade and Sienna sees flickering lights and you see the windows freezing up.

Soulless (Y/N): "Definitely a spirit in here."*converts your right arm into an EMF Meter*"Sienna, turn off your aura so I can get a good signal."

Sienna: "Right sorry."*turns off her aura*"How's that?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Better, now to look for the spirit."

Sienna: "Why do you need my Aura to be off to get a better signal?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Your aura and ghosts are both detectable to the EMF Meter. Sometimes ghosts make electromagnetic occurrences, your aura and auras ofeveryone else does the same except they don't make the lights go on the fritz."

Your EMF Meter detects a spirit and you and Sienna see books floating all by an unseen force and they seem to be sorting around and you see the spirit itself takes the form of a faunus with features resembling a puma as Sienna recognizes him.

Sienna: "Tukson, is that you?"

Tukson: *turns to Sienna*"High Leader Sienna Kahn, it's been awhile."

Soulless (Y/N): "What happened to you Tukson?"

Tuckson: "Two humans happened."

Sienna: "Can you describe them?"

Tukson: "One of them was a boy dressed in grey with mechanical legs as his weapon of choice and the other was a girl with green hair and her skin was dark, why did you send humans to kill me?"

Sienna: "I didn't send them."

Soulless (Y/N): "I believe it was Roman Torchwick, although it seems he's not the only criminal who devised this plan."

Sienna: "Adam Tarturus."

Soulless (Y/N): "Yep, his faction was here alright."

Tukson: "If I wasn't such a coward I would be still alive."

Sienna: "I forgive you Tukson, it's your choice to leave the White Fang, not mine or Adam's or even Roman's."

Soulless (Y/N): "Do you know where your remains are buried?"

Tukson: "They were never buried, they were hidden in the basement of my bookstore. Why do you want to know where they are?"

Soulless (Y/N): "We just want to help you to rest in peace, by burning the only thing that's keeping you here among the living."

Tukson: "Can you at least exact my revenge?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Leave your murderers to us, we'll take care of them, you have my word pal."

Tukson: "Emerald Sustrai and Mercury Black."

Soulless (Y/N): "Thanks for the names, now for the remains."

We see you, Tukson, and Sienna in the basement where you see a rotting corpse of Tukson's body as Sienna was disgusted by the stench.

Sienna: *plugs her nose*"Ugh, this is disgusting and undignifying."

You then pull out a container of salt and then pour it on the remains and you pour kerosene on the remains as both Tukson and Sienna were curious of what you're doing.

Tukson: "What are you doing?"

Sienna: "Why are you pouring salt on the body?"

Soulless (Y/N): "In some cultures salt is a sign of purity. Iron and salt hurts like heck for ghosts and I found out that both salt and iron can destroy a person's aura with one hit."*light a match*"Burn the remains with salt will help the spirit go to Heaven or Hell. In Tukson's case, Heaven."

You then throw the match onto the body as it lights on fire as Tukson turns into an orb of light and goes to Heaven.

Soulless (Y/N): "Have a nice trip to Heaven, Tuk."

Tukson: *while going to Heaven*"Thank you."

Sienna: "Wait, couldn't you just bring him back to life like with-"*remembers what happened*"-actually never mind."

Soulless (Y/N): "What?"

Sienna: " Remember when you resurrected me and I was.....in my birthday suit."

Soulless (Y/N): "Yeah."*realizes*"Oh....oh yeah I see what you mean. That would have been awkward."

Sienna: "Yeah I did not want to see him naked."*shivers*"Now let's get out of here."

Soulless (Y/N): "Alright, the next case might not be an easy one. It's in Atlas."

Sienna: "Awww! Why Atlas!? I'm not a winter person."

Soulless (Y/N): "It involves a Soul Eater, very dangerous things. Their homes don't follow the rules of space and time and you see the captured souls of the living are being held there and I need your help to make a sigil out of blood to kill it."

Sienna: "Why can't you?"

Soulless (Y/N): "The job requires hands and as you can see."*holds up your metal hands*"My hands are metal."*hands Sienna the sigil on a sheet of paper*"Here's the sigil to kill the Soul Eater."

Sienna: "And this thing is gonna kill this....Soul Eater?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Yep, we need this on both ends."

Sienna: "Okay, and how do we get to Atlas and just a heads up it's not exactly a welcome place for faunus."

Soulless (Y/N): "Hmm, I got an idea."

Later, we see you and Sienna on a public transport and Sienna is wearing a bonnet that covers her ears.

Sienna: "Well at least I'm warm, you couldn't have grabbed a sweater?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Well, fear no more."*quickly knits a sweater in Sienna's size*"I always come prepared."

Sienna: *wears the sweater*"Thanks."

Soulless (Y/N): "No problem. Now let's get that Soul Eater."

We later see you and Sienna in Atlas as you look to be a man with a prosthetic scorpion tail.

Soulless (Y/N): "Hey, do you know that faunus? Is he a friend of yours?"

Sienna: *gasps*"Is he anything but a friend, that's Tyrian Callows, an insane scorpion who committed mass genocide. I didn't think he would be alive."

Soulless (Y/N): "Should I silence him so he can no longer harm people?"

Sienna: "Yes you should."

Soulless (Y/N): "Glad to hear it Sienna."

Later, we see Tyrian in the alleys and he turns arounds and sees nothing, then something just cuts off his mechanical tail all the way down to the base as he screams in agony.

Tyrian: "Ahh! You b#tch! Where are you?! Show yourself!"

Watts: *over the scroll*"Tyrian what is going on?!"

We see you knockdown Tyrian to the ground and place your foot on his head to hold him down as you grab his scroll.

Soulless (Y/N): *to Watts*"I'm afraid Mr. Callows can't come to the scroll right now. Please leave a message after the crushing of his scroll. And may hell burn him."

You then crush his scroll into pieces and you pull out your machete and then slice off Tyrian's head. Later, in Salem's castle, we see Salem open her bedroom door and she sees a box and she opens it to see Tyrian's head in it.

Salem: *sighs*"As expected, Tyrian has failed me."*sees a note from Arthur Watts and reads*"You can kiss my behind you old hag of a hellish spawn of Grimm, hugs and kisses, Arthur Watts!?!"

We see Salem scream in pure anger and rage. Meanwhile we see Watts in a room with Cinder and Neo and he sees a seer grimm enter the room and a cloudy avatar of Salem appears from the seer and she was angry at Watts.

Watts: "Salem, what is it?"

Salem: "You are no longer of use to me, Watts!"

We then see the seer Grimm shoot out it's tendril like ribbons at Watts choking him as he is dragged into another room and stabbed and torn apart into pieces. Both Neo and Cinder were very terrified and confused at what just happened. While they were both unaware you looked to see a lamp attached to Cinder as you sneaked to her and took it and disappeared. Later on we see you and Sienna at the hotel where the most reports happened.

Soulless (Y/N): "Well we took out Tyrian and his accomplice, although this lamp looks nice."

Sienna: *sees the lamp*"That's the Relic of Knowledge, I thought that along with the other relics were a myth."

Soulless (Y/N): "What does it do?"

Sienna: "You ask the relic a question by saying her name."

Soulless (Y/N): "And what is her name?"

Sienna then whispers your name and you got it.

Soulless (Y/N): " That's her name? Okay let's give it a try."

Sienna: "Hold it, you can only ask her 3 questions every one hundred years."

Soulless (Y/N): "Oh okay, so we gotta use these questions sparingly."

Sienna: "Yeah, so how can we kill the Soul Eater if you can't go on the other end since you don't have a soul."

Soulless (Y/N): "We get help from someone."

Sienna: "Hmm, and who would help us?"

Later, in a car you rented, we see you bring back an large unconscious woman with a potato sack on her head and you park where the Soul Eater's hunting ground is and you carry the woman into the house and put her into a chair and pull the bag off of her head and then slap her face to wake her up.

Elm: "Huh? W-where am I?"

Sienna: *stammers*"You brought an Ace-ops here?!"

Elm: *sees Sienna* "Wait....I know you, your Sienna Khan the former High Leader of the White Fang, we thought you were dead."

Soulless (Y/N): "I brought her back to life. We'll get to that later, we need your help."

Elm: "What?"

Soulless (Y/N): "There's a monster called a Soul Eater and it's eating away the souls of the people in the hospital, including other Ace-Ops like Harriet and Clover."

Elm: "And you kidnapped me!?"

Soulless (Y/N): "It's an easier method, you see I don't have a soul and this creature only goes after people with souls."

Elm: "Okay, and how do we beat it?"

You then show the paper of the sigil that can kill the Soul Eater.

Soulless (Y/N): "Paint this symbol with your own blood."*pulls out a knife*"Here take this."

Elm: *takes the knife*"Okay if you say so."

We then see the Soul Eater appear as it then grabs Elm and then takes her to it's home dimension. We then see you pull out a jar of Tyrian's blood and you make the sigil on your end as Elm makes the sigil on her end and you both activate the sigil and destroy the Soul Eater. We then see Elm reappear as she was a bit terrified from what she saw in the Soul Eater's realm and she sees the jar of Tyrian's blood in your hand.

Elm: "What's that?"

Soulless (Y/N): "A jar of the blood of Tyrian Callows, can't have Sienna's hands be ruined by being cut by a knife."

Sienna: "Aww thank you."

You then hand Tyrian's tail to Elm's hands and she was surprised that you easily killed a genocidal maniac faunus.

Soulless (Y/N): "You can keep that tail as a souvenir if you like."

Elm: "Um thanks."

Soulless (Y/N): "Your welcome and your friends should be waking up now."

Elm: " Thank you for your help."

Soulless (Y/N): "No problem and you know for a bulky girl, you're actually pretty cute."

Elm: *blushes and giggles*"Aw thanks."

Later, we see you and Sienna with the other Ace-Ops in their base.

Clover: "Thank you for saving us (Y/N) and High Leader Sienna.  You two are welcome  into Atlas anytime."

Soulless (Y/N): "Anytime, although I need help with one mission."

Marrow: "Getting you new arms?"

Soulless (Y/N): "No....Taking out this General Ironwood person."

Harriet: "What?!"*Arms her weapon*"And why do you want to do that?"

(Y/N): " Just hear me out, overtime your General will become determined on saving his kingdom that it will be his downfall."

Vine: "What do you mean?"

Soulless (Y/N): "His war mongering, making civilians scared of him, to the point where he would destroy a city is what makes him a criminal in disguise."

Marrow: "Your kidding right?

Soulless (Y/N): "Does it look like I'm kidding?"

Harriet: "Well, how can we help?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Hmm, wait, killing Ironwood is something that I would not do."

Sienna: "(Y/N) doesn't have a soul, destroying the Soul Eater is just him going through the motions. He hasn't slept for months, trust me I know."

Clover: "What do you have in mind?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Let Salem and Ironwood fight do their own thing, I know a spell to summon a  big friend of mine."

Harriet: "And what do we do?"

Soulless (Y/N): "Play along."

Next: Chapter 37: SCP-001 "The Gate Guardian"

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