New Year's Eve 2001 

This year Hunter is throwing a small party because Shar is going to be out for the night Olly and I had a dinner to celebrate that it's technically our anniversary, it kind of falls on both New Years Eve and day which is cool. 

Brandi is walking with us over to Hunter's tonight, and later, Zoe will walk home with her and crash at the Benson's house.  Olly and I plan to leave early. We want to be alone this year at that special time.

Brandi has been acting off since that night in early December when she came to my house. She brushed that off, told me she was wasted, had a nightmare at Wade's, got confused, and came over. I don't buy that, but what am I supposed to do, call her a liar?

She's not with Wade as often as she used to be, and I know they're fighting more than they ever have. I see it on her face, in her demeanor, everything. I hear her tone when he calls her, and she ducks off into another room, so I can't hear what she's saying to him.

Whatever happened that night, changed something, and now she's decided to stop venting to us about him. I hate being in the dark because I'm constantly worried. Both Olly and I are sitting here in limbo with no clue what to do for her. We debate about it a lot. Olly wants to give her some kind of intervention about Wade, but I refuse to do anything aggressive with her.

It's... just so complicated and frustrating for both of us.

Not only because we hate seeing her hurting, but we both feel at fault for it. Olly, even worse than me, it eats away at him sometimes. If we hadn't hurt her the way we did exactly one year ago today, she might not have spiraled and regressed to Wade in the first place.

"Let's just take her not spending New Year's Eve with Wade as a win and have fun tonight," Olly suggests, and I agree.

Brandi steps out as we reach her driveway. She's also dressed for the weather in jeans and a zip-up hoodie with her Uggs. She wears those things everywhere now. They've replaced her black boots as her signature shoe.

"What's with the cars? Is Billy having a party?" I ask, noticing the three cars in the driveway.

"No," Brandi says. "You won't believe this. He's letting Stephanie and her friends hang out here. They're planning on gorging on junk food and watching movies until midnight, then watching the ball drop on TV."

"Seriously? He's not going to Laine's?" I question in shock. "So, are they a thing now?"

"No, just good friends. She said she doesn't want to date yet," Brandi says. "Or drink, she's so weird."

"Not wanting to drink is not weird," Olly defends as the three of us start walking.

"Yeah, and if she's not ready to date yet, so what?" I add in. "Everyone has their own pace for that kind of stuff."

"It's not that she doesn't want to, though. She said she's excited to have her first drink, go to her first party, go on a date, and all that stuff, but she's afraid it'll pull her focus from getting into Yale. Seems like an obsession or something," Brandi says.

"I'd say she's being smart," Olly says thoughtfully. "It sounds like she knows herself well enough to know she should wait until she's a little older."

"Exactly," I agree with Olly, and Brandi shrugs.

"Yeah, I guess she's good for Billy. His grades are better, and he's nicer," Brandi comments. "He hasn't even thought about asking anyone out since meeting her. I think he's going to wait around until Stephanie wants to date and hope it's him."

"Oh my gosh, that is so sweet." I can't help it. I gush, then shake my head. Since when is Billy sweet?

**

When we get to Hunter's, there's one car parked outside, including Zoe's. The door is unlocked, so we let ourselves in.

Blake, one of Hunter's friends, is at the counter mixing up some drinks. He's using the random plastic ones Shar used to give us Kooliad in. It's humorous to see Mickey Mouse on the front of a boozy glass. 

Hunter's house is so comforting, always the same. It reminds me of Olly's old place too, even the white and blue kitchen floor, we spilled lots of juice and soda on looks the same. The counters are lined up with snacks and drinks for the party and the big metal table is set up with a CD player for music, and a deck of cards. 

"Where are Zoe and Hunter?" I ask as we all step further inside the kitchen. 

"Out back smoking a joint," Blake says. "Zoe has some news for him."

"Oh," I nod knowingly. 

She broke the news to Brandi and me a few days ago that she's going to move back in with her dad after the school year is over. I'm sad to see her go but happy for her too. I know this will be so good for her.

Brandi and I each grab a mixed drink from the counter, and Olly opens the fridge,

"Zima?"

"Those are for Erin. Better not touch 'em," Blake warns.

Olly puts them back and grabs a beer instead.

As if on cue, the door opens, and Erin walks in with a few of her friends. She looks perfect as usual, her makeup kept natural and her shiny black hair falling over her shoulders in loose waves. She's wearing a plaid tweed skirt with brown tights, tall brown boots, and a sweater that hugs her figure perfectly.

"Hey, Erin!" Olly greets her, and she smiles at him.

"Hi, everyone," Erin says.

"Hey, y'all. Happy New Year," I say with a smile.

"Come in, grab some drinks. I made vodka Sprites," Blake gestures, and the girls all hustle in.

They're both cute girls, both dressed up similar to Erin, in short skirts and tall boots, but Erin outshines them. Everyone really, it's annoying as heck. 

"None for me," One of the girls, I think her name is Jamie, says. "I'm driving, and Beth and I are leaving for another party soon."

Of course, they'd be too cool to stay here long, fine by me. Secretly, I wouldn't mind if Erin left, too, and I know that's awful. I get along fine with her; I just don't...like her, and that's okay. I mean, there are people we don't like in this world. It is totally normal. 

Still, I haven't told anyone I don't like her. And I do feel a little guilty when I think negative thoughts about her.

The other girl, Beth, grabs a drink, and Erin opens the fridge.

"He got them!" Erin cheers as she grabs a Zima from the fridge.

"Seriously?" Beth makes a face.

"Don't knock it till you try it," Erin teases her sounding like Hunter. She pops the top off, then hands it to her.

"No thanks." Beth shudders as she hands it back and Blake laughs.

"That'd be my reaction."

"Your loss," Erin quips as she takes a small sip from it.

"It's your first anniversary tonight, right?" Erin says as her gaze shifts to Olly and I. "Congratulations."

"Yeah, it is.." I say awkwardly because Brandi is here right now, and it's also the anniversary of that... so the air suddenly feels heavy. "Thanks."

"One year is amazing. Cheers to that," Brandi breaks up the tension as she holds her glass up. "To my two best friends."

"Cheers!" Blake holds his up, and we all drink.

I feel much better as I meet Brandi's eyes and only find a genuine smile there.

I head over to the table, and I can see Zoe and Hunter outside the sliding glass door, standing outside and talking.

Hunter's style has shifted lately. He still has a cool and laid-back look, but he's more grown up and a lot less skater. He's done with the overly baggy jeans and skulls and chains. His hair is also cut short now into a spiky style that makes his eyes pop enough to light up entire towns.

Tonight, he's got a pair of faded blue jeans on that fit him perfectly with a flannel. I could see a pair of cowboy boots on him. Maybe someday I'll get him a pair for a birthday or something.

Hunter spots me and I wave as he opens the door.

"Hey Darlin, look at you in your cute boots," Hunter says with an easy smile as he walks in with Zoe behind him.

"There you are." Erin steps closer before I can respond, and Hunter sees the scowl on her face.

He steps closer to Erin and offers her a smile that should make her melt. "Hi, gorgeous," His attempt to charm her falls short when she crosses her arms. I don't get how she can be cold to him. What'd he even do?

"Were you two out there smoking weed?" she questions irritably. "You totally reek of it."

"It's New Year's Eve, Erin. Chill out," Beth says, and Jamie shushes her.

"He told me he quit because it makes it hard for him to focus, and he wants to pass Junior year," Erin snaps back. "But obviously not."

"I did quit. This was a one-time deal for old times," Hunter explains.

"Don't blame Hunter," Zoe says. "I had to talk to him about something, and having one for old times was my idea."

"I'm just going to leave," Erin says cooly. "Since you'd rather hang with your ex-girlfriend, smoking pot."

"Really?" Hunter looks irritated as he raises an eyebrow, "Then fine, go have fun with your friends, so I can have fun with mine!"

"Fine!" She yells back but doesn't move.

Brandi slides onto the seat next to me, and I can see her watching them intently, a tiny amused look in her eyes. She's obviously enjoying the fight not being her own for once.

Hunter whirls around and storms back out to the patio. I start to get up, but Olly stops me, gently putting his hand on my shoulder. "Let me go talk to him."

I shrug but stay put. I guess me going out there might not really help if she's feeling jealous of Zoe.

"Erin ... I was telling him I'm leaving at the end of the year," Zoe explains. "We've never been anything but friends."

"Right," she mutters.

"It's true," Zoe breathes, "Can we talk for a second in the other room?"

"Yeah, I guess," Erin agrees.

"Damn, you think she's going to tell her?" Brandi asks once they're out of earshot, and I kick her, motioning to the other two girls in the house.

We sip our drinks, and the other two girls stand in the kitchen. They're murmuring quietly to each other, while they wait to see if Erin is leaving with them or staying.

Blake freshens up his drink and goes to sit on the shabby old tan couch, oblivious to the drama as he flips on the TV.

Hunter comes back inside first, with Olly behind him, his gaze searching the room for Erin.

"She didn't leave, did she?" Hunter no longer looks annoyed, but I am. Why is Erin ruining his New Year's Eve over a stupid joint?

"No, she's talking to Zoe," Brandi assures him.

"Hey..." Erin emerges from the hallway and walks up to Hunter, a softer look in her eyes as well. "Zoe explained some things, and I'm sorry I got jealous. I'm sure you're bummed such a good friend is leaving."

"No, I'm sorry if I made you feel left out or bad. I'd never want to do that, Babe."

Now she's melting, and I feel a little ill as I get up for another drink.

"Let's finish this. Um, talk in private," she suggests, and they're both laughing softly as I hear them shuffle out of the room.

I start mixing up a drink as I stand at the counter, my body tense. Brandi walks up to make a drink, too, and she leans in close.

"Kinz, you have a major bitch face on. Take a breath," she whispers in my ear.

I do release a breath but then give her a sharp look that she returns with a bit of an accusatory one of her own.

"It's not like that," I mutter quietly.

"Good," she whispers. "This is good for you, Hunter, with someone. Learn to like her."

I nod and grab my drink, opting not to argue with her. She doesn't get it. It's not that I'm jealous. I don't know if Erin's right for him. But it's not my call or my business, so I push it aside.

I head back to the living room, where I find Olly chatting with Blake and Zoe on the couch.

I sit down next to Olly, and he slips an arm around me, a soft, happy smile on his face.

***

Trigger warning- this part could be hard to read for anyone sensitive to topics involving sexual assault. If you wish to skip this I will leave a brief summary at the bottom.

Mid-February 2002

"I can't believe you brought back Mr. Worthaton!" I giggle as Olly and I take the elevator back to our room.

One of Zoe's friends hooked us up, and I mean big time. He got us all fake IDs so we could all go to this cool Battle of the Bands thing last weekend. With it, Olly secured us a hotel room for this weekend, and Valentine's Day was just a few nights ago, so the timing is perfect.

The Mathletes have their out-of-town tournament this weekend, and Nate is in it. Kris and David think Olly is going along with Nate for moral support.

I took a chance and told my mama the truth, and it paid off. She covered for me and told my dad I'm going to a friend's house for the weekend, but it feels good to know I'm not lying to her about this.

We enjoyed the IDs thoroughly in the hotel lounge, well I did. I had two glasses of wine, but Olly stuck to soda and said he'd have some strawberry wine later. We brought back our old rich identities for fun as the night went on, just to ourselves, of course, but we had fun with it.

We're still laughing as we walk back into our room, it's really a nice room with a huge bed, an oversized fluffy comforter, and a bathtub with a whirlpool tub in it. Olly brought strawberry wine and some chocolate-covered strawberries to go with it for later after we try out the bed.

"Your phone is ringing," Olly says, picking it up from the end table just as it stops, and his eyes widen. "You have like ten missed calls... from Brandi."

"What?"

It rings again, and he answers it. "Brandi?"

I watch curiously as his face changes. "Where are you?" He grabs the keys from the end table and motions for me to follow. He's walking fast, and I hustle to keep up with him as we duck down the corridor.

"Just stay where you are, B- we'll–" He stops talking and groans. "Damn it. The call dropped."

"Olly, what's going on?"

"I don't know," He mumbles as he dials her back. It goes right to her voicemail. "Something is really wrong, Love. Her tone, she sounded so scared, and she was - she thought it was you calling, and then when she said my name, she whimpered it."

The night she called me at three AM comes roaring back, and suddenly my blood feels like ice water. All I want to do is get to her and make sure she's okay.

"Where is she?" I ask nervously. It feels like the elevator is taking a million years to reach the lobby.

"She said Green Street. I think she's walking."

"That's a few blocks from Wade's."

When the elevator finally reaches the bottom, Olly and I run out to his car. We don't talk much on the twenty-minute drive back to Sweet Haven; we're both too worried to voice anything out loud at this point.

I try Brandi a bunch more times, and it goes to voicemail every time. We don't find her on Green Street, but Olly keeps driving forward. "I know where she'll be."

We drive past the street that Olly and Brandi's houses are on, not caring at this point if his mom does see us. When we get to the park, I'm nodding. Of course, she always comes here.

Olly and I get out of the car and head into the park. It's lit simply with a single streetlamp, giving it an eerie yellow glow so late at night. We see her sitting on a swing, her head down. She's only wearing a men's tee shirt, I'm assuming Wade's. She doesn't even have shoes on.

Last time I had a suspicion, a very strong feeling that has plagued me ever since that night. This time, I know what happened, I just know.

Why didn't I do more before? Why didn't I tell my mama or something?

"Brandi," I call out carefully, and she looks up.

"Kinsey?" She stands up, and I notice her knees are wobbly and shaking. Her eyes fall to Olly next, and she lets out a sob. "Olly."

She runs to him, and he catches her in his arms quickly. She begins to shake as she starts sobbing. I clamp a hand over my mouth to stifle the sob that wants to escape me as I watch Olly, whose eyes are also welling up with tears start whispering soothing words to her.

"You're safe now. I promise, okay," he's saying as she literally shakes in his arms. "I'm here, and Kinz, we're right here."

I can't even say how long we stand there like that. But eventually, Brandi lets go, and Olly carefully releases her. She looks at me with teary eyes. I notice some blood on her forehead, and her lip is also swollen and looks like it might be split.

"I'm so sorry... It is your Valentine's Day and–"

"Don't apologize. I said anytime, remember?" I remind her.

Olly is taking his jacket off and wrapping it over her shoulders as she shivers from the cold.

"Yeah," she sniffles.

"Let's get out of here," Olly suggests, and then in a soft voice, he adds. "I think... maybe we need to go to the hospital, B."

"No!" her face fills with panic, and she steps back. "No, please. Kinsey tell him no."

"But Brandi if you're hurt," I say gently.

"No!" she is starting to breathe heavily, and her face is paling. I'm scared she's going to have a panic attack.

"Shh, it's okay," I assure her quickly. "We won't okay, we won't take you there... Olly, we'll go back to the hotel for now, and then we can decide what to do."

"I don't know Kinsey..." Olly looks so conflicted, and believe me, so am I, but she's flipping out. We can't make her go to the hospital.

"If I go there. I'll have to... and I can't," she starts to sob again, and this time, I wrap her up in my arms, rubbing her back.

Brandi looks up, wiping her eyes, and I can see her gathering strength as she looks at Olly. "Olly, I swear to you. I promise this is it. I won't go back to him again. But you can't – you got to let me choose how I deal with this, okay? Please."

"I want to B, but I don't want you ever hurt again. I want to do the right thing."

"What happened tonight can never be made right," Brandi says gravely, "and I know you want me to go to the hospital and the police, but I can't, okay? Please just understand that right now, I need to feel safe and in control."

"Oh Brandi," Olly breathes out as the tears spill from his eyes. "I do, I get it. What do you need? Do you want to come back to the hotel with us? It's out of town, and we have it for the weekend."

"But it your special weekend–"

"We don't care about that right now. We care about you," I cut her off.

"I do Kinz, I do," she cries. "I just want to be with the two people I love the most and I'll feel safe, and that's you and Olly."

"Then that's what we do," I keep an arm around her, pulling her close to my side as we began to walk to the car. She's shaking like a leaf and it's taking everything I have not to break down with her.

I sit in the back with her as Olly drives us back to the hotel. She rests her head on my shoulder, crying a bit off and on. Olly's gripping the steering wheel tightly, his jaw tense with anger. I don't think he's ever once in his life wanted to hurt someone until now. A part of me wants to tell him to get Hunter, Gabe and Billy and end Wade tonight, but I know that's not what Brandi wants.

When we get up to the room, Brandi excuses herself to the bathroom, and Olly and I look at each other. The mix of anger and sorrow in his eyes, I'm sure, reflects what's shining in mine.

"Damn Kinz... I don't know what to do. He hurt her," he chokes back a sob. "I know she didn't come out and say it, but–"

"I know, and I don't think this is the first time, Olly," I whisper, keeping an eye on the bathroom door.

"How can we not do anything?" Olly starts to pace.

"I'm going to... try and get her to let me take some pictures; maybe down the road, she'll want to do something," I say slowly. "Why don't you go get some food or something? Give me a little time with her."

"Okay," Olly agrees, his eyes pained.

"Olly, don't..."

"Don't what?"

I'm a hypocrite, I'm doing it too, but still, I have to say, "blame yourself for this."

"Too late," he says as he leaves.

This is going to kill him, and I can't do a thing about it. I feel the same guilt and I get it.

Once Olly leaves, I grab the camera we brought along and gently knock on the bathroom door.

"Brandi, can I come in? Olly went to go grab some food."

"Yeah, please," she says.

I open the door and step inside. She's standing in the bathroom in just a towel, looking down at the whirlpool as it fills. Olly's coat is hanging on the bathroom door and the tee-shirt she had on earlier is tossed in the trash. I make a mental note to get rid of it later.

"Please tell me you two brought booze?" she asks as she looks up at me, then her eyes narrow at the camera. "You want me to take pictures."

"In case you ever need them for any reason," I say. "And yes, we have strawberry wine. I'll get you a glass."

"Just bring in the bottle."

I leave and come back quickly with it, handing her the bottle. She opens it and takes a long swig from it.

"Go ahead," she says once she has done that. "Pictures, I mean. If anything, I can use them as a threat to keep him away."

"Okay," I gulp as I take her in.

In the bright light of the bathroom, I can see her much better and she's in rough shape. The blood on her forehead is from her hairline; it looks like a chunk of her hair was pulled out. Her lip is all swollen and split down the center, and her neck is red and starting to bruise.

I take several photos, close up and far away. When she drops the towel, we both cry as I take more pictures of the horrible proof that disgusting, evil man has left on her body.

When we finish, I help her into the tub and sit with her as she soaks in it and sips the wine.

"Do you want me to leave?" I ask, and she shakes her head no.

"Please stay." The strong and witty tone that's usually Brandi's voice is long gone tonight, she sounds so broken and it's killing me to see her like this.

"Of course," I promise.

"I hope... you're not mad that I said I love you and Olly. I didn't mean like that... it just-"

"It's okay. I'm not mad, and he loves you too," I assure her. "You and Olly have a special bond, and I almost ruined that the way I went after him. I'm really sorry about that, Brandi, but know that I will never get in the way or be upset about your bond with him, okay?"

"Oh Kinz, it's okay, it really is," she sniffles.

"No, it's not. How we cheated on you was wrong, and it sent you back to Wade in the first place."

"I made that choice, and Kinz, the truth is I wasn't over Wade when I was with Olly just like Olly wasn't over you. You're right. We have a special bond, and we love each other as friends. Maybe we mistook that for something deeper, or maybe ..." she trails off leaving that thought unfinished.

"Either way, I did move on so fast because I still loved Wade." She lets out a long sigh. "I knew I'd get hurt, but I went back. I made the choice, me, I blame no one but me for that and no one but Wade for what he did tonight."

"Do you want to talk about what happened tonight?"

"No," she says. "I want to forget, but I need to tell you some of it. I need you to be my witness, Kinz, like the pictures. You know, so I have it if I need it."

"I am your witness and your ally one hundred percent whatever you need." I give her an encouraging look.

She takes her time gathering her thoughts.

"We've been breaking up for a while," she starts. "If you can call it that when we were never a couple."

I'm surprised to see all her denials gone, raw and naked, literally and figuratively as she lets all those things go and just faces the truth.

"You probably already guessed that it happened before, that night I called you."

"I had an idea something bad happened that night, and after tonight, I knew," I confirm.

"It wasn't like it was tonight," she says quietly. "I was very confused because I was drunk and passed out, and we'd already had sex. So, when I woke up, and he was on me, I didn't understand why. I was so drunk but also really scared. I just laid there and pretended I was still asleep. Then he finished and rolled over, passing back out. Like it was nothing."

"Oh god," I whisper as a chill runs down my spine. I envision Wade's swarmy smile now and I see nothing but pure evil.

"I started wondering if he'd done that before while I was asleep, which made me sick. I threw up on his bedroom floor, then drove to your house."

She takes another long sip from the bottle and hands it to me, and I do the same, wishing it was vodka.

"We've been fighting about that night off and on ever since," she continues. "I confronted him about it, and he played it off like we both started in on each other. He claimed it was just drunken, sleepy sex, and I was wasted... I let him convince me."

How...how could she let him make her believe that? But I silence those thoughts, Wade is very good at manipulating her and always has been, that bastard. The horrible, awful asshole, my blood boils and I have to bite the inside of my cheek to calm myself down.

"I can't imagine how scary that must've been," I say gently.

"The water is getting cold," Brandi says, and I get up quickly and get a towel for her. As she steps out, I wrap her up in it. I grab a brush from my bag and rummage for some pajamas.

I help her get changed, and then she sits on the toilet while I carefully brush her hair. She's missing a sizeable chunk near her hairline where I can tell her hair was pulled out. I feel as sick as she just described. It's taking everything in me right now not to scream or vomit or both.

"It was easier to buy his story than face what actually happened," Brandi speaks again after a moment. "But in my heart, I knew the truth: I was asleep, and he was not. I couldn't turn off the icky feelings I kept getting. We'd fight about something else, and it would come up again, which would then annoy him, because he'd be all 'we settled this, Babygirl'. Finally, I started distancing myself more and more. I didn't want to be near him very often, but for some reason couldn't walk away either yet."

I finish with her hair, and we exit the bathroom, going to the bed where we sit. The room is now warm and toasty. She's still clutching the bottle she takes one more sip and then I take it from her and set it down on the end table.

"At first, he didn't care;" she continues from where she left off. "It's Wade; he probably just used the time to sleep with other girls. But tonight, I finally just knew I had to end it. I told him that I was done, and he can't stand that, losing, I guess. He tried charming me back, saying all the right things, but I was strong for once."

She lets out a sob at that. "I was so proud of myself, and then –"

"And then?" I prod gently.

She shudders. "And then things got heated and we both said stuff, and then it got bad and... I wish I could forget what happened after that, and I never will. I can't... talk more about what he did tonight. I just can't."

"It's okay," I assure her, quickly wrapping her up in a hug. "You said so much, and you did so good. You don't have to say anymore. But I'm here anytime you want to talk."

"Thank you, Kinsey," she whispers in a shaky voice.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" I ask as I study her.

"My head up here," she motions to where she's missing hair. "And I'm really sore. The wine is helping, so did the bath a little."

"Do you want to lie down? That might be more comfortable," I offer.

She nods and we get into bed and under the covers, she's finally seeming to calm down, her color has returned to her face, and her tears stopped, for now.

Olly walks back in then, holding up a greasy Taco Bell bag. "Hungry?"

"Not even a little," Brandi says with a sigh.

"Yeah same," I say, I still feel sick to my stomach.

"Me neither," Olly sets the bag down and comes to sit with us on the bed. "What can I do?"

"You're doing it," Brandi says. "You're both doing it."

"What if we watch a movie?" I suggest knowing she's ready to get her mind off tonight.

We end up cuddling in the bed with Brandi secured between Olly and me. The movie's been playing for a good half hour, but none of us are paying any attention to it. Brandi starts yawning, and I can see she's about to pass out.

"Should I go sleep on the couch?" Olly asks.

"No, stay, Olly, please," Brandi cries out. "I mean... I'm sorry. Is that okay, Kinz? I feel safe with him here."

"Of course, it is, I told you," I assure her. "Stay right here, Olly."

He catches my eye with a questioning look, and I nod to assure him. I realize maybe most girlfriends wouldn't be okay with this, but I meant what I said earlier and I'm right here. She needs him right now. She needs to feel safe.

"I haven't slept for more than a few hours at a time since that night in December," she confesses. "I never feel safe. But with you two, I do."

We lie there quietly, all three of us heartbroken, as Brandi drifts off to sleep; it doesn't take her long. Olly and I stare sadly into each other eyes as she sleeps between us.

"Night in December?" he whispers.

"That night she came to my house," I whisper, then glance to ensure she's still asleep. "He hurt her that night, too, while she was sleeping."

"I've never hated anymore more than him," Olly's eyes burn with tears of anger.

"Me too," I agree. "Me too, Olly."

There isn't anything else to say, anything else we can say; we simply lie there with her as we each wallow in our own guilt over it all.

*For anyone that skipped the second section- Brandi called Kinsey and Olly after Wade upset, it's obvious she's been SA'd by Wade. They care for her and feel very guilty over it because them getting together led her back to Wade. 

Sorry this one was so long, but I didn't want three flashbacks chaps in a row for story continuity, and I also didn't want to edit or skim over her story since it's so important.