WHEN I SAY IT;
DO YOU BELIEVE ME?

When I tell you I love you, I don't really think you believe me. I know that you try to and you tell me about how you feel the same way - I know, I can see that. But when you tell me how much you have poured into the cup when I haven't poured as much, breaks my heart - I know, I can see that.

When I tell you I love you, I don't really think you believe me. I say it a lot but most of the time I fear that I do not have the luxury to go all in because I am bound to chains that keep me grounded. I write about you a lot but these words can only go so far before you find someone who can do better.

When I tell you I love you, I don't really think you believe me. I mean, who am I to talk about love when people repeatedly tell me I do not know how to. I mean, who am I to talk about love when my environment has placed me in situations that were too hard for me to consider it love.

When I tell you I love you, I don't really think you believe me. And I always cope by pushing you away and building my walls up so when the day comes you get tired of me, it'll be easy to move on. And I always cope by beating myself up because I still don't know how to love.

When I tell you I love you, I don't really think you believe me. Maybe you do but you often question it and that's when the doubt starts to sink in. Maybe you do but then you recall all the times I could not make it up to you, all the apologies I wasted, all the time I took for granted, and all the times I said I love you.

When I say it, do you believe me?