"But Sav..."

"Becky. I'm fine. Please don't beat your brother up," I reply, cutting her off. It's been two weeks since Haydon stormed out and Becky hasn't let it go since, despite it being completely my fault.

"But he hurt you." She whines down the phone.

"I hurt him too." I retort.

"Pfft. It's not like he walked in on you having sex with Brett."

"Becky..." I trail off, "I kissed Brett." I remind her. As soon as Haydon had left I'd rung Becky. My beautiful best friend had ditched her important catwalk assignment and driven the three hours to my college, gathering me into her arms and listening intently. She didn't flinch as I told her what happened, despite the fact that it probably hurt her that I betrayed her brother. She's too nice to me and I don't deserve her.

"I know but..."

"Becky." I cut her off, biting my lip as I walk down the sidewalk. "I'm in the wrong. Not him."

"Fine." She gives in, "I'd finally gotten used to you two."

"Sorry Becs."

"It's okay. I just want you to be happy."

"You're cute." I reply, the endearing word no doubt instantly annoying her.

"Don't call me that." She snaps slightly, "How are you though? Really?"

"Uh... it hurts." I admit, looking up and down the street before crossing quickly. "I can't deny that." I shrug, despite the fact she can't see me. "But I'll be okay."

"Damn right you will be. You're Savannah Hurst." She exclaims and I can't help but grin at my best friend's enthusiasm, despite the fact that I tore her brother's heart in two.

"How's Haydon?" I ask, my voice quieter as I continue my stroll down the sidewalk.

"He's alright I think." Becky replies, "He's been keeping to himself. I haven't really seen him." She continues and a wave of remorse floods over me, "Dad took him out last night though."

"I feel so guilty for what happened." I mutter.

"Sav, I know you weren't exactly girlfriend of the year but my brother didn't even hear you out." Becky points out, "Break ups are always sticky." She moans, "It's why I don't date."

"That's a very compelling point. Maybe I'll join you in your quest to sleep with California." I tease.

"I would be happy to take you under my wing."

"I'm sure." I reply, laughing slightly.

"Elena says you haven't really left your room." Becky says, her voice serious. I take a deep breath in as I attempt to broach the subject in the best way. I mean of course I haven't. I loved Haydon. I just don't know whether I was in love with him.

But either way he meant a lot to me, he helped me through my last year of high school, helping me discover alternative options to cheerleading, ones that I would actually enjoy. He aided me in finding my passion for writing. He was my first real boyfriend and I would be lying if I said my heart hadn't broken.

"I'm out now aren't I?" I defend myself to Becky.

"Because you're on your way to work!" She scoffs.

"Well..."

"Sav, you gotta get out! I don't want you to become bedridden." She lectures and I wrinkle my nose up at her accusation.

"I'm not that bad."

"What did you do last night?" She argues.

"I watched a film." I say softly.

"What film?"

"Nancy Drew." I admit, wincing slightly.

"Nancy Drew?" She chuckles, "I watched that when I was seven!"

"I needed something with no adult romance in it." I whine and hear her sigh at the other end of the line.

"Tomorrow's your birthday." She points out, "Go out."

"I don't know..."

"I've already spoken with Elena." She cuts me off, "She'll take you to a party and you'll have a great time." She continues, "I would come but apparently the New York catwalk can't wait the extra day." She snorts. Damn this girl for always looking out for me, why can't I just curl up in bed forever and become housebound? I'd eat chocolate all day and be happy. Chuck in a pizza every now and again, it sounds like a dream.

"Becs!" I exclaim, "It's an incredible opportunity to showcase your clothes in New York."

"Yeah I know but your birthday is more important." She retorts as I stop in front of the cafe and push the door open.

"There's always next year." I laugh, "I've got to go Becs, I'm at work now."

"Alright, have fun." She exclaims, "And enjoy your birthday."

"I'll try!" I reply before pulling the phone away from my ear and hanging up, smiling across the counter at Louise as I walk over.

*~*~*

I'm two hours into my shift when the door opens and the familiar brunette with her hair pulled up into its signature chignon walks in, a Chanel bag hanging off her arm. My eyes are wide as I take her in and she immediately smiles at me, striding over. There's nowhere for me to run, nowhere to hide. I'm stuck behind the counter to endure the wrath of the wealthy, impressive business woman.

"Savannah!" She exclaims as she reaches the counter, her smile widening.

"Mrs Winters." I greet, shooting her a quick, slightly shy smile.

"I'll have a latte please." She asks, glancing round at the relatively busy cafe.

"To go?" I ask.

"Of course." She laughs. Of course. It's not like she'd sit in a place like this. Silly you, Savannah.

"We haven't seen you for a long time." She mentions as I grab onto a cup.

"Umm..." I manage, turning to face her, "I..."

"You're not in a relationship with my son." She finishes for me, smiling knowingly. Bingo. Why would she see me? I'm not in a relationship with Brett and I never will be. She doesn't even need to pretend that she knows me.

"No." I confirm, turning away to make the latte.

"That's a shame." She replies after five seconds.

"Oh..." I reply, my eyebrow raised curiously as I turn back towards her.

"I haven't seen him as happy as he was when he was around you." She mentions and I nearly scoff.

"I don't really think that's the case." I politely reply, placing the lid on the cup.

"I know my son." She replies a small smile playing on her lips.

"Do you?" I retort before I can comprehend what I'm saying.

"Excuse me?"

"I... I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything..." I trail off, swallowing the lump in my throat before placing the coffee in front of her. "I'm sorry. Please excuse me." I smile swiftly, "Here's your latte. I must go and clean the tables." I babble before turning away and leaving Louise to finish up, a confused look on her face as I make my hasty exit.

I can't believe the words that just fell out of my mouth. No matter what you think about people Savannah, you should keep it locked up inside your head, especially when they have millions of dollars to crush you with.

I'll be kicked out of America within a week.

*~*~*

"Are you sure?" Elena asks, "I completely understand if you don't want to."

"E, I'm fine." I assure her, grabbing her hand and dragging her up the stairs to the front door, "I need to distract myself." I snort, shoving the door open and pulling her into the already heaving party.

I've given them a miss since Haydon and I broke up, instead curling up in bed each night on the phone to Becky or Elle as I watch romance films, a cake in one hand, a burger in the other. What can I say, I'm a multi-tasker.

"Yes but..." Elena trails off as I let go of her hand and turn to face her.

"I'm fine. Now go get me some punch." I order, smiling at her. She quickly nods, disappearing around the corner to grab a drink. I'm immediately attacked from behind, small slight arms wrapping around me as a giggle sounds. Polly.

*~*~*

Sitting on the swing I sway back and forth, watching the loud house from afar. Leaving Elena with Kyle I'd wandered out to the garden, hoping for a bit of peace and quiet. I was curious when I discovered a swing-set at the end of the garden, baffled as to why anyone would have one at college. 

Wait, don't people like... use them for sex and stuff? Oh my god what if I'm sat on someone's outdoor sex...

"Hey." My thoughts are cut off by Brett's deep voice and I glance up, eyes wide. His hands are shoved into his pockets as he approaches me cautiously, a wary look on his face.

"Hey!" I shoot him a small smile to assure him that it's okay to come closer.

"Mind if I sit?"

"I don't even think I should be sitting here." I scoff. Wait, it's Brett. He deserves to sit on someone else's sex germs. "Yeah, sure." I smile. He nods, lowering down next to me.

"Are you okay?" He asks and I nod.

"I just needed some air."

"Me too." He admits, "Why are we always at these parties?"

"Because it's expected of us?" I scoff, "Everyone always drags us here?"

"Seems about right." He laughs lowly, "It's funny. I say I hate being popular but I still follow whatever everyone else wants me to do."

"If it makes you feel any better I'm just as bad." I reveal, "I've been drawn into this life of partying and I'm still trying to figure out whether it's my thing."

"I'm not complaining when I always get to see you." He replies, glancing towards me, "It makes it worth it."

"Whatever." I mutter, looking down at my blue dress, grabbing the material and fiddling with it between my fingers.

"I mean it." He mutters and I bite my lip to keep myself silent, desperate not to let loose at him tonight. A couple of drinks in me and my tongue is as free as a bird, it could squawk the entire English vocabulary of curse words to him for betraying me back at school.

I grimace at the thought, immediately trying to shove it away before I'm caught back up in all the negative feelings I hold for him. I'm trying to move passed it - he's done enough apologising. We should be able to move on as friends.

"Happy birthday." He says and I glance over at him. He remembers?

"Thanks." I manage to mutter out a reply, still startled.

"Have you done anything nice?" He asks.

"I had lunch with Elle and Alex, her boyfriend. But he was working tonight so they had to leave straight after."

"That sucks." He acknowledges and I nod slightly before shrugging.

"It was nice of them to come." I smile softly at the thought, the bracelet from Elle currently hanging around my wrist, the designer sunglasses from Alex tucked up in my drawer ready for the warm weather. Elle had been reluctant to leave and I had been unwilling to let her until Alex brought out a two tier birthday cake with a number '19' painted on for me. At least now I had cake to keep me company.

I smile at the thought of the cake waiting for me back at my dorm room, sat in pride of place in the middle of the desk, half eaten already.

"How are you?" Brett pipes up softly, shooting me a concerned look. "Since..." He trails off. Wow, he looks awkward.

"Since Haydon broke up with me?" I fill in for him, shooting him a quick smile, "I'll be okay."

"I'm sorry..." He trails off once more, glancing down at his hands.

"We were growing apart anyway." I shrug, sadly, "Whatever happened wasn't your fault. It was mine." I admit, swallowing down the lump that always appears in my throat when I think of the loss of Haydon.

"But I didn't help." He inputs and I glance over at him, slight worry in his eyes.

"No." I agree, "You didn't."

We descend into silence once more as he sighs under his breath, looking back towards the lit up house. I glance over too, envious of the students dancing as they laugh and drink, their lives clearly less dramatic than mine. What did I do to Fate to deserve this life?

"What happened to you after I left Edgewater?" Brett speaks up, turning his head to face me once more.

"Didn't everyone tell you?" I scoff, shaking my head as I wrap my arms around myself.

"I didn't keep in the loop." He admits, glancing back down at his hands, "I felt awful for what happened. I didn't want to hear anything in case I'd fucked everything up for you." He says quietly and I bite my lip.

"Its gonna take more than an immature, stupid teenage jock to break me you know."

"So it would appear." He chuckles lowly before looking up at me and smiling, "I'm glad."

"Ashley and I got kicked off the cheerleading team." I admit, grinning, "That was her fall from grace." I shrug, "I faded back into the background and got on with life."

"I don't believe you."

"What?" I retort.

"I may be an immature, stupid jock but I went to that school." He almost scoffs, "You were in a relationship with me and you fought Ashley Farrier." He shrugs, "That meant something there." He points out. As much as I hate to admit it, smug, arrogant Brett is right.

"Maybe you didn't know the school as well as you thought." I argue, looking down at my hands in my lap.

"I wish that were true." He chuckles, "Come on!"

"Alright." I give in, looking over towards him, "We were kicked off the team for fighting. It was like an outbreak of war." I recall, "Half the school backed Ashley, half the school backed me." I smirk, "It was really strange." I shake my head slightly, "I was invited to every party, asked on loads of dates." I shrug, "I enjoyed it for a while. It was everything I'd ever wanted. To be known, to be noticed, to be popular." I admit as he nods in agreement, him knowing more than anyone how it feels. "But when Ashley started stirring the pot, trying to get me expelled and trying to take me down, I got fed up." I continue, "I stuck my head back in the books, stopped going to the parties." I grimace as I look away from him, "She won in the end. She always did."

"She won't." He pipes up after a few moments, "You'll win."

"She's out there somewhere, living it up in college. She's probably the head cheerleader of her college team."

"She isn't." Brett advises and I raise an eyebrow at him, "My Mom is friends with her Mom." He explains, grinning, "She didn't even make the team."

"She didn't?"

"Don't look so happy about that." He laughs.

"Sorry."

"Don't be." He grins, "Anyway, in five years time, you'll be the one who's won."

"You don't know that." I reply as he nudges into my shoulder.

"Yes I do. You're Savannah fucking Hurst." He retorts, "I think I know by now. You're incredible." He assures, staring into my eyes with such certainty that suddenly I don't doubt his words.

Wow.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••