HELLO!!!

I'm not sure if my comments before and after each chapter are annoying or not, but I always feel like I have to acknowledge any soul brave enough to keep reading my story. I know it hasn't all been pretty and some of it has been down right terrible...

But, I'm so happy to post again so soon. I have scheduled this update, the first time doing so, to help pace myself, for your benefit and mine, incase another writer's block hits. When you get this update, it'll be about 5 days past when I'm writing this. :) And I'll have another chapter underway.

Please, Kindly remember to Vote and feel free to comment if you desire to. I'd love to hear from you!

As always, Take Care and Stay Safe! ~CANGEL

***

District 4

Finnick Odair

     The salt of the Ocean next door lingered in the airy breeze blowing through opened windows. Humidity touched his skin, causing a slight stick between him and the white leather couch beneath him. Even years after being given it, it was still in pristine condition, a testament to its relative uselessness.

     His gaze locked on the large television hanging from the family room wall, the Capitol emblem filling the otherwise black screen, waiting for the program to start. Since he was in District 4, he was required to watch with everyone else.

     The final stop in Scarlet's Victory tour. District 14.

     Little Cricket sat curled in his lap, her head resting against his chest as she stared at the wall in a bored daze while picking at a hole in her pants knee. He ruffled her thin brown curls absently, a silent thanks for her unknowing support. Her steady breaths were a comfort to him, and her weight kept him from fidgeting too much.

     Mags sat next to him, her head coming up to his chin, her wrinkled, sun-kissed hand resting on his thigh. Her skin, though wrinkled looked soft, but her palms were roughened with callouses that could only be gained through a full life of hard work. He tried to draw strength from her, but with Mags, Cricket, Aspen, Dagon, and Rio here along with him, the family room wasn't nearly big enough.

     Suffocating. More like.

     Even with Aspen absorbing most of the immediate contact and sitting on the same couch as Finnick's brother and father. It was still suffocating.

     The ease with which they settled next to each other. Their voices layered with disappointment every time they talked to him. Their eyes heavy with judgement, as they looked at a son and brother they recognized, but didn't like.

     It was all suffocating.

     Small fingers pinched his wrist, squeezing like a vice, twisting his skin. "Ouch." He murmured as he straightened, resettling Cricket.

     "It's starting, Finnick!" She said excitedly, leaning so far forward he was worried she might fall on her face as she stared at the screen in unmatched anticipation.

     At five, Cricket was the only one there who could watch the Capitol broadcasts with any sort of joy with an innocent filter protecting her from the harsh realities. One day, she would grow up and learn that everything was not as it should be, but for now, Finnick was loathe to let anything destroy her wide-eyed enthusiasm. He knew Aspen and Mags felt the same.

     The Capitol emblem faded from the screen, and the broadcast began showcasing acres and acres of snow covered forested greens under a dark grey cloud covered sky.

     "Finnick?" Cricket called out, shifting to her knees suddenly, her face gripping his cheeks tightly as her face got nose to nose with him. Her serious face had him stifling his complaint about her sharp knees digging into his femur.

     "Yes?" He answered, returning her serious look with one of his own.

     "Is it cold in District 14?"

     "You know it is, Cricket." Aspen answered before Finnick could, exasperated in the way that only an older sibling of two could be.

     Cricket stuck her tongue out at him but when she turned toward Finnick, happy mood ruined, he sent her a wink, causing her to break out into a fit of five-year-old giggles. "You want to know what District 14 is like?" He asked her.

     Other than Mags, he was the only person in the room who had ever left District 4. Hopefully, they would never leave. As much as they were curious about the other Districts and the Capitol, District 4 was safest for them.

     She nodded enthusiastically, her brown curls scattering across her face and her green eyes lighting up brightly.

     He chuckled under his breath. Small as she was, he could easily scoop her up and situate her back onto her butt, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing lightly making her squeal as he shook her while keeping her squirming to a minimum.

     "Everyone knows District 14 is cold." Finnick started, his eyes finding the screen on his wall still covering a surface view of the Districts most attractive feature—the wildlife and woods. "They never see rain—when the clouds get heavy, the water falls frozen. Snow. When you hold it in your bare hands, it stings your skin and hardens your muscles." He smiled when Cricket's hand closed tight in a little fist, as if imagining the coldness settling in her tiny little hand. "It sits piled on the ground, never, ever leaving or melting, when the sun does shine, it makes the entire ground sparkle."

     "Like the diamonds from District 1?" She asked excitedly. "Oh, I love their costumes in the tribute parade! They're always my favorite, but this year, The Wicked Wolf's was better." She wiggled a bit, her wide eyes staring up at Finnick. "Don't you think so?"

     "She was stunning in the Tribute Parade." He offered a placating smile as thoughts of Scarlet's first appearance flickered in his mind. Cassandra had made her small frame appear shockingly powerful—something that had caught Finnick off guard and had threatened his young tributes, especially Roe.

     Finnick turned histhoughts back to her first question. Away from thoughts of his dead tributes, andof Cassandra, who was now an Avox, serving somewhere in the Capitol. District14 was a breeze compared to all of that. The sun hadn't shined at all while he'd been there briefly on his Victory Tour, but from the screens he had witnessed the magnificent sight turning cold and barren lands into a dazzling heart stopping sight. "Like the water sparkles when the sun rises or sets, hitting the water just right, to where it doesn't even seem like water anymore." Finnick finally said. Cricket nodded her head, knowing exactly what he meant. "There is no grass there, no sand, or warm water to swim in."

      "Wait," Cricket said, as she twisted her head around as best she could with him holding her still, her eyes wide and for the first time, horror filled them. "So, they never go swimming?"

     "Never." He paused, letting his words saturate the young girl's mind. Cricket loved swimming. "The air smells like pines, even though there are no trees near any of the houses. The scent of the woods around their District is as pungent as the salt in the air is here." Out of the corner of his eye, he finds Aspen drawing in a quiet breath and Finnick grinned. Until he had left District 4, he'd not thought the air here was different or special at all, so he could understand Aspen's curiosity. "The cold is bitter. The type of cold that settles in your bones like a bad sunburn." Cricket shivers and quite honestly, Finnick did too. He'd had plenty of sunburn that once settled, made his skin feel on fire and his body drained of energy. "Wind tears through the thickest fabric and threatens to cut your skin. Breathing is hard there, like a sharp ache in your lungs."

     "Like when you stay underwater for too long?"

     "Exactly." He smiled, just a bit, his eyes shifting away from the girl and back toward the screen. "That's what District 14 is like."

      Finnick didn't mention the quiet, or the hostility written on their faces. The run down buildings or the thin rags most wore for clothing. He saw his dad open his mouth, no doubt adding his critique of a District he'd only witnessed on television, but Cricket started bouncing on his lap, held still only by Finnick's lightly squeezing grip. He dropped his arms as Cricket pointed at the television, as if they weren't all already watching.

     "Look!" She gasped, leaning forward, hands gripping his knees with child-like strength. Finnick looked, and saw Scarlet exiting the train. Her black curls blew wildly in the wind, whipping her across the face, her metal mask held in place across her lower face. Her golden eyes gleamed and the red silk wrapped around her body stood out against the pure white ground. "It's the Wicked Wolfe!" Her fingers gripped his skin tightly and he shifted awkwardly as he hoped she'd move her hands. Nope. Her fingers dug in harder. "She's so pretty...Like a goddess." Her words, a near perfect echo of the last time she had met Scarlet, carried nothing but pure admiration in a way that only a child could express.

     Finnick felt his mouth twitch into a faint smile, silently agreeing with the girls assessment. Goddess' weren't particularly kind or particularly nurturing. They were strong and deadly and powerful. Beautiful—but more than that, their presence was commanding. Alluring. Scarlet, dressed in her red garb and metal mask, was a powerful image that anyone watching could feel. Of course, at five, Cricket was only looking at the beautiful, flawless image, but it didn't make her any less right.

     Despite Cricket's enthusiasm, Finnick felt a shift in the room. A scoff sounded from the couch adjacent to his.

     "A 'goddess', huh?" His father muttered, his tone sharp with disdain. "Let me tell you, Cricket, that girl is far from it. Just because she's got some looks about her and a Victory attached to her name doesn't mean she's someone to look up too."

     Finnick felt the underlying sting of his words. He met his father's eyes for a moment, before turning back to the screen. "You remember what Scarlet told you, Cricket?" He asked her, gently prodding her in the direction that his father had tried to shove her.

     Cricket nodded confidently. "There are no gods or goddesses. Just....masks..." Cricket's voice trailed off. "...Dress-up. And Dancing." She finished confidently, drawing a laugh from Finnick. That's about what he got out of it the first time he'd asked her too, what Scarlet had whispered in her ear.

     "I meant, what did you say about who you should try to be." Finnick clarified lightly.

     "Myself." Cricket answered in a tone that stated she thought she thought the answer was rather obvious.

      Finnick shot his father a look, silently saying, 'see, she's not such a bad influence after all', but Dagon had already moved on, watching the screen with a look equivalent to him looking at a rotted fish mingling with the rest of his fresh haul.

     A shifting body caught his attention, and Finnick glanced over at Aspen, tucked as far into the side of the couch as he could. Ever the one to hate attention, he really had bit the bullet for Finnick. He definitely owed Aspen.

     Still, despite his squashed seating arrangements and his aversion to drawing attention to himself, Aspen asked, "What was she like?" He cleared his throat, his voice scratchy, awkward. "In the Capitol, I mean."

     For a moment, Finnick stilled, the unexpected question causing something unexpected to stir inside. Not jealousy...but something close. The urge more similar to wanting to keep the things he knew about her to himself. He didn't want to share it, not with Aspen, who was the same age as her, tall and blonde haired—then he saw Aspen eye him with irritation, and Finnick knew that his question had not been born of any real interest, but as a way to draw Finnick's attention away from his father.

     He owed Aspen quite a bit, it seemed, shooting him a grateful grin, as he began wracking his brain for words that best suited her. "She's...strong-willed and temperamental." Finnick said. "Spirited for sure. Sharp-witted." Finnick laughed a bit, recalling Scarlet in the boat in District 4. "Curious and impatient. Ruthless and cold, when she needs to be...sometimes when she doesn't..."

     Finnick's words trailed off as he watched Scarlet approach the stage with even strides. Her feet must have been freezing, strapped in open-toed heels as she walked through the deep snow, but she never made even a small show that she was uncomfortable or cold in the harshness of her unforgiving District.

     They all watched from the warmth of District 4, as Scarlet stepped up the stairs, slick with snow, nothing but a card grasped tightly in her hand.

     When Finnick had made his way through his own Victory Tour, he remembered the card in his own hand. The weight of the card, holding words written for him—not by him, feeling heavier than it should. In a way, he had been glad that the choice had been taken from him—a kind of shield that stayed in place between him and the families that lost...

     But Scarlet was not like him. In every speech she delivered, he could see the urge to deviate from the script in the way she slightly hesitated or stumbled through her words. The way she gripped the card between her fingers, as if fighting the urge to throw it to the wind.

      Scarlet liked real—and those words were very fake.

     The Mayor of District 14, a pudgy short man, with pale skin and rosy cheeks made a speech that Finnick only half listened too.

     "Citizens of District 14...moment of pride for our District—Our very own tribute has risen to triumph, a testament to the resilience, tenacity, and strength that lies within our community." He paused, offering a small, practiced smile as his gaze shifted to Scarlet. "Scarlet Wolfe, Wicked Wolfe, your victory brings honor to District 14. It is a rare thing, to stand where you stand, to achieve what you have achieved. Today, we congratulate you...and we thank you." He turned back to the crowd, his voice raising with practiced fervor as he continued, "And let us not forget the gracious Capitol..."

     But Finnick's attention was pulled from the Mayor as the camera showed the many faces in the District 14 audience.

     Hatred. Hostility. Disgust.

     Fear.

     There was not one face that was looking at Scarlet with thanks or gratefulness. Not one face that showed the Mayors words held even a bit of truth in them.

     As the camera's adjusted, Finnick sucked in a sharp breath, then stilled, eyeing the girl on his lap—but she was too engrossed in listening to the Mayor finish up his niceties to notice the change in Finnick.

     When a Victor went on his or her Victory Tour, it was a requirement for the families to stand on a platform, slightly risen from the audience below them. A way to give respect to the families who had lost children in the prior Hunger Games. When a Victor visited their own District, it was common for the family of the fallen to stand on the platform, and the family of the Victor to stand upon the stage, in a show of support for the newfound Victor.

     There had never—to his knowledge—been a time where siblings had entered the Arena at the same time—still, Finnick had not thought...

     He stared hard at the screen, feeling prickles of unease itch beneath the surface of his skin. Scarlet's face gave nothing away, as she stared at her District's unforgiving, wrathful faces. Not so much as a flinch or a lowered chin, as she stared at her own families' unforgiving faces, huddled together against the cold, on the platform of the fallen male's tribute.

     As Scarlet stepped forward, toward the microphone, a new movement drew his attention. A boy stepped forward hesitantly, glancing up at the Mayor who, short as he was, towered over the child. A short, impatient nod from the Mayor had the boy moving forward. Black haired, and pale faced, the boy closed the distance between him and Scarlet, his relief near palpable.

     For a fleeting second, he thought it was Crimson himself upon the stage, but no. The solemn eyes held none of the cold calculation and the boy who stood on the stage now, though tall, was lanky and awkward with youth.

     Scarlet's face didn't change, but her eyes tracked the boy's movements, and only when he stopped a foot away from her, did she turn back toward the microphone. The two of them standing side by side were jarring to say the least. An inch or so taller than her, with a solemn gaze and dark curls, their similarities were striking. Scarlet had a younger brother...what was his name?
Cadmium.

     The one who shared a room with her. Her teasing, sardonic remark about him not being afraid, while drawing a claw across her neck. Was this her support? The only family to welcome her home?

     "Citizens of District 14," she said, her tone unwavering but devoid any warmth. "Today, we stand together in unity with all of Panem." She was reciting the Capitol's scripted speech, but her delivery was flat, drained of any forced cheer or adoration.

     As she spoke, Finnick watched the boy standing beside his sister with quiet resolve. He felt a pang of understanding and sympathy. He wondered how much of Scarlet's defensive speeches and sharp edges had been shaped by her family's reactions to her Victory—by a District that seemed reluctant, even resentful, to embrace her return.

     Mags caught his eye, her expression unreadable but filled with subtle solidarity, a small nod of approval that went unseen by everyone else. It was a quiet affirmation of support, though neither of them spoke a word.

     Finnick knew that Mags would embrace the girl in any way she could, whenever she saw Scarlet in the Capitol. Though he wasn't sure that Mags would be successful, he found himself interested in watching just who would out stubborn the other.

     "Now it all makes sense." His father's harsh voice cut through Scarlet's scripted speech and Finnick's thoughts like a sharpened blade, drawing the attention of everyone but Cricket, who's eyes were still glued to the girl wrapped in red. "It's that District—she's not any different from the rest of them. None of them know how to give respect when owed. Stubborn and too prideful by half."

     "Yeah, because we're so humble here in District 4." Finnick murmured back, not able to stop himself from commenting on the double standard ringing in his ears.

     Dagon's eyes narrowed on him, before turning back to the television. "You're right." He paused, but Finnick knew he wasn't done. His father had never been one to let someone else get the last word, though his barbed tongue had never often been directed at him—until much more recently... "Maybe it's the opposite problem. Not enough pride." Dagon's eyes slid back to Finnick, disappointment lingering there. "Something I'm sure you'd recognize."

     Finnick rolled his eyes, keeping the pain out of his voice and off his face. "Nice, Dad."

     It wasn't nice at all.

     Mags' hand pressed against the top of his. She understood. He let out a breath. At least someone had his back.

     There is a deathly quiet lull, drawing Finnick's attention back to the television. He watched the card drop to her side, her eyes looking out at the crowd, unyielding and firm, and then her eyes went to her family, standing on the platform under her brother's image.

      "Of all that I have done," she said, the emotion behind her words making her voice thicker than before, rising and falling in a just barely notable change of pitch. "I have no regrets."

    The crowd rippled with uncomfortable murmurs.

     "Victor or not, her attitude won't get her that far." Dagon commented, distaste ringing clear. Finnick bit his tongue to keep from responding. He couldn't change their opinions of himself, let alone someone else from another District.

    "What an unbelievable..." His brother's shocked voice drew his attention. Rio was leaning forward on the couch, his eyes latched onto the screen. "What a freaking psychopath."

     But she wasn't. Finnick looked back at the screen catching the tightness near her eyes. The clenched hands at her side.

     She didn't regret—couldn't regret—but she felt that pain. Staring into such adversity, he might have said the same. No part of him wanted to bare his pain to his father or brother, not with their hostility, and he'd shared a much deeper bond than Scarlet likely had with anyone from her District, apart from her family.

     Those words were her shield, as the card filled with scripted words had been his. He realized.

     Her brother, Cadmium, stepped forward, even as those words echoed through the air and covered her hand with his. She glanced over at him, apprehension in her eyes, but a wordless look that spanned no more than a second, had her shoulders relaxing slightly and her chin dipped in a shallow nod.

     Finnick watched as the boy leaned forward into the microphone, his gaze trained on Crimson's portrait hanging above his gathered family. His voice, quiet but clear, echoed across the plaza. "Find peace in death, Crimson Wolfe of District 14. May your soul run forever free."

     The words...they were familiar. As Finnick tried to place them, he watched the siblings with growing admiration. Cadmium's pale fingers intertwined with Scarlet's black claws, a striking contrast, but the message was clear. United. Supported. Loved.

     As they moved away from the microphone, toward the side of the stage, Scarlet's voice carried quieter, as if she hadn't intentionally let it be heard. "He is, Cad. He is." The faintest hint of emotion seeped into her voice, letting him know, at least, that the coldness to her speech was indeed a shield. Hiding her feelings from those who would use it against her.

     As the Mayor made his way to the center of the stage once more, Aspen's voice broke the silence. "That boy beside her..." Aspen murmured quietly. "Finnick, do you know him?"

     Finnick glanced over at him, seeing a flicker of curiosity crossing the younger boys face. He couldn't tell if it was admiration, or simple curiosity, but there wasn't any judgement—which was unusual in and of itself for Aspen, so Finnick answered honestly. "I'm pretty sure it's Cadmium. She talked about him in the Capitol. Joked how he was the only one who wasn't afraid of her."

     "As if that's something to joke about." Everyone ignored his father's words.

      Aspen's eyes stayed on the screen even though the boy was far out of the camera lens. "Mmm." He made of sound of acknowledgement, his brow lowering, before he turned toward Finnick. "I'm not sure she was joking."

    "No," Finnick said, his voice low and hushed. "I don't think so either."

     Finnick glanced at his brother and father. They were the remnants of his family. A family of four cut down to three. But even though the three of them still existed. Finnick. Rio. And Dagon. His family was but an empty shell.

     "Tonight, we give thanks to Panem, to our President, united in our dedication to a brighter future. Forever united. Forever one. We are one united Panem."

     With that, the broadcast ended, and the image of District 14 faded, leaving the room in a heavy silence. Cricket let out a long breath, as if she'd been holding it, and her fingers finally unclenched from their grip near his knees.

     "She's...amazing." His father's disapproving snort was drowned out by the awe in Cricket's voice.

     Suddenly, the invigorated child turned around, clambering off Finnick, before standing on the couch, her feet sinking in to cushioning foam between him and Mags. 

     Her chin stuck up and her chest out. "Of all that I have done." Her voice comically deepened, far lower than Scarlet's was, in an effort to sound mature. "I have no regrets."

      "Cricket..." Aspen called out, warning her she was crossing boundaries and needed to turn back. Her actions, while innocent in intent, were not condoned in District 4, a so callous and brazen support of the Games—of the death they demanded.

     "If I were your sister," Cricket said, pointedly looking down at Finnick. "I'd have held your hand on the stage." Then her eyes flicked up at Aspen in annoyance. "But not yours."

     Aspen shot off the couch in a rush. "Why you little..." With a squeak and joyful laughter, Cricket climbed over the back of the couch, sliding down to the hard wood floors, taking off like a bullet. Aspen in quick pursuit, with his heavy footsteps echoing through the otherwise empty house.

     Her words were harmless enough, and Finnick knew that Aspen wouldn't take offense or dig any deeper than the frustrated child meant them too. But Finnick's eyes flickered over to his brother. Rio.

     Now, his brother was engaged in a conversation with their father, neither thought to include Finnick, though he was well within earshot.

     Once, Finnick had been Rio's role model. His hero. But that time was long past. And Rio no longer shared those idealistic thoughts. Finnick wasn't perfect, he had flaws and made poor judgements.

     But they were still brothers.

     And yet, watching him now from where he sat on the couch, Finnick wasn't sure in the least if Rio would still choose to stand on the stage next to him.

     Through his actions, he fought to keep his family safe. Through his silence, he guaranteed their lack of protest. But through it all, Finnick was beginning to wonder what, if anything, he had left for himself.

      In some ways, Finnick thought as he moved his gaze to the black screen hanging from the wall, Scarlet was far more lucky than he.

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I'm not crying; If you say I am, I'll call you a liar. :....( Shush

When I read this chapter, I get put through the emotional wringer.  I feel like it is a legit roller coaster shifting through various aspects like the tension in the family room back in District 4, to innocent little Cricket, to the heartbreaking and infuriating scene playing out back in District 14. To the sharp and cutting comments made from Dagon and Rio. The silent support from Mags, or the quiet support from Aspen, back to innocent little Cricket, and then ending back again with tragic Finnick....

Hopefully, it all came through. If it didn't, let me know. Only way to improve is to know and change :)

For those of you who did like and enjoy this chapter, who was your favorite person? Why?

Any predictions made from this chapter about the future of anyone involved?

Any Questions for me??? :)

Remember to VOTE and COMMENT!

Take Care and Stay Safe! ~CANGEL