Arjun POV

She left the room and i took the deep breath of relief... i also didn't want her in my room.... i didn't want because i had my reasons. In this dark night, behind these 4 dark walls... i was not the mafia king Arjun Verma who was arrogant, rigid and ruthless but a vulnerable 13 years old child Arjun who saw his mother got murdered front of him... who was tormented and still scared by those memories.
"My mother was everything to me... she was my angel... but i lost her... she wanted to save her.... she wanted to save Mukta so she took the bullet on her... i lost her and i felt if her blood still on my hands.... "

"I heard many times that my father was mafia and he had many enemies but my mother always made sure that i should be away from that bloodshed and crime... she couldn't change my father but she wanted to protect me from this pit... but what she got in the end... a tragic death..."

"I am feeling goosebumps when i recalled her dying face... she was feeling so much pain... my father tried to save her... we took her to hospital but she lost her life... she didn't want me to see as a blood hungry monster... but i became the one... what will she think about me if she is seeing me from somewhere like people said...."

"This black night is only time in whole day when i always feel if i am dying each moment with the burden of my deeds... how much my father tried to save me from his black shadow of underworld but due to Raghubeer singh he couldn't... "

"I could be a responsible Citizen... i could have a nice job... i could lead a simple life with a simple family but all my dreams destroyed in a blink... "

"Everyday i try to sleep, like today also i am trying to sleep but my nightmares don't let me sleep... i became insomniac... i have been forget if in last 15 years i got a good peaceful sleep... i always get up in the middle of night due to my nightmares... my parents face comes in my dreams... and i always feel if i am still a 13 years old helpless child who couldn't save them...."

"The guilt, the anger is so much to endure... only this is the reason why i want to dominate and keep the power in my hands.. if this game is for power.... i will not loose this ever.... i can't show my this weakness to someone... whenever i want to some sleep.... i fucked my whores and kicked them out from my room... whenever things take toll on my mind... i release the tension by killing the source of my problem and by fucking the women... "

"I only love and adore one lady... that is my late mother... and no woman can take her place... i saw many women in my life... Neha.... Nikita.... Mukta... and so many others whose names i can't even remember but all of them are gold diggers... self centered and opportunists... they are only good for warm the bed... and Mukta my beautiful wife.... she is the complete package... she is selfish.. she is deceitful... a black shadow in facade of innocent face... "

"She should be killed because i know she can destroy me... i always crosses the forbidden line with her... she is my enemy and she is my death... whenever i went near her she pushed me into deep remorse and i know this very well but whenever i touch her or hold her... i feel she is my salvation.... her face has the power who can ease my pain... "

"Is it possible that a same person can be your destroyer or saviour at the same time... but i am experiencing this feeling... i want to be away from her but at the same moment i want her in my arms... i cannot forbid my heart to feel the joy whenever i touch her... she is only mine this feeling give me immense satisfaction if i has also someone in my life but at the same time i know that i can't have her fully.... because she is poison.... if i want to be save from her spells i has to push her away from me... i can keep her in my life but i can't trust her for my life..."

"I always wish if i didn't lost my mother ever then may be things would be different now... i would be happily settled with Mukta... she is my mother's first choice for me... she could get my all love but she is ill fated girl... she came in my life and snatched everything... now i decided she will pay me for each and every pain... she has to be my wife whether she like or not... she has to carry my child whether she like or not... she will give me my heir.... and after that she can die peacefully...."

I puffed my cigarette and closed my eyes.... physical intimacy with her was never my intention... i just wanted to scare her... broke her but after seeing her i lost control on my horses...

I never felt my desire so high with any other woman... she was so captivating... as soon as i found her... i wanted to dive in her charm... when i had sex with her, first time in my life i was feeling so intense... she was the sweet desert which i could have again and again but still craving was so hard.... first time i took her unintentionally but today it was purely decided because she had the power to quench my desire.... "

"She is raw and inexperienced... she doesn't know how to woo a man and only this thing ignites my desire for her... i enjoyed so much when her scared and reluctant eyes saw me... i enjoyed when her soft shivering petals touched my burning lips.... i liked the fact despite of her resistance and ignorance she was dripping wet for me... her body was responsive to my touch... my tiny touch can explode her in pool of raw desire... although she denies but she is equally affected like me... only this thing make me mad for her... only she is so fragile yet strong to bear my unleashes emotions..."

I got up and walked out from that dark room of mine... i opened the door and came inside the other room where she was sleeping or pretending to sleep after seeing me... i saw the little girl Nooria... she was looking so innocent and careless from her surroundings... if i ever had a little sister... she would be exactly like her... she was the only person after a long time who made me feel something so positive.... she was fierce and bold unlike Mukta...

I doubted if she could adjust in her new life at my home... because that place didn't belong to her. I felt if it was my responsibility to secure her from every wrong thing in her life....