"Holy fucking shit. You just threw your dad out on his ass." I breathed, running my hands through my hair.

Tobias walked into the house after me. "I did." He agreed.

I turned around and placed my hands on his shoulders. "Tobias. I'm so damn proud of you. I can't imagine how tough that was but he couldn't just walk away scott free. Not again. Not after what he did to Dad and not after what he did to you." I tried to assure him.

My heart was beating so fast but the only thing on my mind was comforting Tobias.

"I thought I was going to have to kill him. I was mentally ready." I panted, staring into his eyes.

He looked at me nervously. "I..." He looked down at his hands. They looked red and bruised and it broke my heart that they were shaking.

I grabbed a hold of his hands and held on tight, looking straight into his eyes. "He will never touch you ever again. You made that very clear tonight. You have nothing to feel bad about right now. You are so brave, Tobias." I looked into his eyes.

Jolting us back into reality, the front door suddenly opened. My heart dropped into my stomach but quickly calmed down as soon as I saw Dad and Gwen walkthrough.

"Oh, perfect. It's you guys." I exhaled, dropping my shoulders.

Dad looked at me confused but proceeded to take off his shoes.

"I made ramen for you guys if you want to eat something." Tobias breathed, pointing behind him to the kitchen.

"Yeah, we've got to tell you what just—"

I took in my Dad's face as he got closer. He looked tormented with something. His shoulders were slumped and his gaze kept darting around, not focusing in on us. He looked like he was trying to hold something back but couldn't hide it. He ran his hands down his pants as he stepped closer into the hallway to meet us.

Gwen looked no better. Her eyes were rimmed red with her hands rubbing up and down her arms to keep herself warm.

Dad stepped up to us and finally looked up to meet our eyes.

"I-um-" He gulped. "I have to talk to you two first. It's...important." He breathed.

☀️☀️☀️

Tobias and I sat beside each other, across from Dad and Gwen at the dinner table.

I seriously had no clue what this could possibly be about. Did Dad know about Tobias and I? Did he find out and now he's going to ban us from seeing each other? Or, did something happen at the restaurant? Were we in financial trouble?

My mind racked all the possibilities but nothing could compare to what slipped out of his mouth next.

Gwen grabbed a hold of his hand as Dad processed his words.

"I have cancer." He breathed.

My eyes widened, and my mouth went slack. Huh?

"I have prostate cancer. And, it's pretty advanced. I caught it way too far and um—" He gulped. "I found out today I don't have that much time—"

"What are you talking about?" I spat.

"Elijah" Tobias's strained voice in my ear.

"No. I'm just confused." I huffed, looking back and forth between Gwen and Dad. "This has got to be some sort of joke. Or, the doctors are wrong or something." I shook my head. "How could everything just be fine and now you have cancer? No." I backed up my chair and a sharp screeching sound echoed through the room.

Dad closed his eyes before slowly opening them again. "Elijah..."

"No. When did you know?" I asked. My heart beating out of my chest.

"W-When I got into that fight with Derrick Voss...I went to the hospital where they checked me out. They said something weird came up in my blood when they did a blood test. A few weeks later it came back that they wanted to check me out for cancer. I found out a few weeks before I booked this holiday off."

"So, you knew this whole time that you were walking around with cancer and we had no clue." I huffed.

"Is that why you and Gwen were arguing that day in the restaurant?" Tobias spoke up.

I whipped my head in his direction. Pressure building up behind my eyes.

"I had just told Gwen about my diagnosis and how I didn't think it was right for us to be together. It wasn't going to get easier and I didn't want to subject her to it. I was wrong obviously for choosing for her. That was her decision and she chose to stay with me–"

"You knew?" I asked, looking over at Tobias. He looked back at me confused, tears in his eyes.

"What?" He breathed.

"You knew that something was wrong and you didn't say anything." I swallowed. How could he?

"Elijah, come on. I had no clue this was happening." Tobias breathed.

"Elijah, don't be like this. Tobias didn't know what was going on."

"He knew something was wrong. He knew and didn't tell me just like you two knew and didn't tell me." I bit, pointing to the both of them staring back at me. I stood up from my chair. "I could have done something. I could've been better. I could've been there for you more. I would've been nicer. I-" I felt my brain going into overdrive. I needed a moment.

"I gotta go." I said, rushing out of the room.

"Elijah–" Tobias called out, chasing after me.

I didn't want him to see me like this. I didn't want him around, at all. How could he not tell me?

"No! Stay away from me." I yelled, slamming the back door behind me. I ran out towards the dock.

"Elijah, don't do this." Tobias stammered.

"If I wasn't so wrapped up in you all summer long, maybe I would've known earlier. Maybe I would've figured it out." I cried.

"You can't think that way. That's not fair. How could we have known?" Tobias called out.

"Just leave me alone! Don't fucking come near me." I spat.

In a flash, Tobias ran over to me from behind, turning in front of me to block me from walking any farther.

"No, you're not doing this. You're not doing this again." He said grabbing a hold of my arms.

This was so frustrating! Why couldn't he just let me be?!

"You're not going to shut me out like you did last time. You're not going to turn your back on me or your Dad. He deserves better than that. There's no running away from hard things this time." He said, stopping me. There was no escaping his hold. Tobias was bigger and stronger than me. And he was determined to have me hear him out. I could tell by the look in his eyes.

"You're scared. I get it. I'm scared too. But so is your Dad. Your Dad is probably ten times more scared than the both of us combined. So it's time for you to suck it up and be a big boy because he's going to need us right now." Tobias panted. I felt hot pressure build up behind my eyes.

I tried moving away again but there was no budging this time.

"Let me go." I pleaded. The tears have now spilled over and I feel nothing but defeat.

"No. Never. I'm never going to let you go. Not again, Elijah. You push people away when things get too hard or too tough but not this time. You're in too deep with me this time. I'm in love with you and there's no way either of us are going to get through this without each other." I could tell he was holding his tears back too. His voice was all shaky and strained.

My eyebrows furrowed as I wiped my tears away from my face with the back of my arm.

He stepped closer to me, moving his hands from my arms to holding my face in his palms.

"He's going to need you, Elijah. I'm going to need you. Please." Tobias voice cracked as he pleaded.

My heart shattered. He was right. I wrapped my arms around his neck to pull him in. He sniffled into my neck, trying to hold back his tears.

"I'm not going to leave you, Tobias. We'll get through this. All of us. As a family." I sniffled, holding him close, rocking us side to side.

I realized now he may not have ever had anyone hold him like this. I squeezed him even tighter.

Hearing a little shuffle in the grass behind us, I turned around to see my Dad standing there, watching us.

I gasped.

"Dad. I-"

"H-How long has this been..." He looked between the two of us, soaked in each other's tears.

I looked at Tobias who looked at me with caring eyes.

"I guess...since forever, really." I shrugged, wiping the tears falling from my eyes. I sniffled, looking back at my dad.

"Are you upset?" Tobias' voice quivered.

"What?" Dad looked shocked, stepping closer. "No, of course not. I-I'm just...you two are serious? Because we're a family so if you do this...you better be serious about it. That's all." He gave us a half smile.

I nodded my head slowly looking back at Tobias who placed his hand softly on my lower back.

"I'm serious." Tobias smiled softly with tears in his eyes. "I love him. A lot."

I closed my eyes to soak in his words. I needed to hear that way more than I thought I did. Especially right now. "I love him, Dad." I nodded, looking back at my Dad. "It's serious."

I swallowed back my tears.

"Then, come here. The both of you. Let me hold you." Dad choked out.

We both rushed over like little kids. I felt so small as Dad held on to us both tightly. We both cried in his arms for what felt like forever.

"We're going to be okay. We're going to be okay." Dad repeated softly in our ears. 

☀️

Author's Note: 

A lottttt just happened. How are you? Are you okay? I'm sorry to drop this ball on you but...

If I'm being honest, this book means a lot to me because I based Jude's character after my Dad. 

If you've been following along (and thank you so much for doing so) you could probably tell how much I love Jude. He's kind hearted, he makes mistakes but he's so so good. He cares for everyone and would give anyone the shirt off his own back. My Dad was a really good man and sometimes good people get such a shitty end of the stick. I HATE cancer with a passion and If you are struggling with it - or you have a family member who has it...just know that I'm sending you so so much love. 💖 I know it doesn't fix anything... but you're not alone. 

Seriously, my messages are always open.