Elisha's POV

It was three am and I am studying right now. Hindi pa ako natutulog dahil hindi ako makatulog. So I decided to just study para hindi ako magsasayang ng oras na nakatulala lang sa bubong.

I'm also worried about the fact na mayroong taong pumasok dito sa bahay at baka maulit lang 'yon at madamay pa anv kapatid ko.

10 am ang first class ko mamaya at may graded recitation doon. Mamayang hapon naman iprepresent ang pinractice namin kahapon.

Sobrang nakaka-stress yung ganito, parang hindi ko kakayanin. I really want to get over this already. Gusto ko bumalik sa dati ang schedule ko, body clock ko. 'Yung wala akong kailangang problemahin ulit.

I sighed before finishing reading 2 chapters of the book, siguro naman ay maaalala ko naman ito mamaya. I drank water from my tumbler and I didn't notice that I was slowly dozing off.

I woke up when I felt uncomfortable, shit! Sa table ako makatulog. Inunat ko naman ang aking likod at grabe ang sakit no'n. That's what you get for sleeping late because of studying Elisha!

Madali naman akong naligo at inayos ang gamit ko dahil it was 8:45 na. It takes 30-40 minutes to get to the school.

I made coffee and a sandwich and ate it on the go. After arriving at the parking, binilisan ko ang pagkolekta ng aking gamit at tumakbo na papunta sa classroom.

I arrived a few minutes before our professor did, buti na lang. Inaantok pa ko habang nagsasalita yung Prof. namin. I was half asleep when I was called to solve a problem upfront.

Of course, nasagutan ko naman 'yon dahil nga nag aral ako kaninang madaling araw. Hanga naman sa'kin ang Prof. at pinaupo na ako.

"Elisha, did you sleep properly last night?" tanong sa'kin ng katabi ko at umiling ako bago pumikit ang mata ko. Nagising na lang ako sa ring ng bell at pinalabas naman agad kami ng Prof. It was about 11:50 am and I went to buy a salad and a can of coke.

Pumunta naman din ako sa library para doon kumain at magbasa din ng libro. This is me in my normal state, usually nakatambay lang ako sa library dahil wala naman akong kaibigan dito sa university ko maliban kay Kevin.

Iba kasi course niya kaya bihira lang din kami magkita, depende na lang kung pinlano namin.

Speaking of him, we haven't talk ever since he tried asking me out. Feeling ko hindi ako pumayag sa kanya dahil hindi ko siya type at hindi ko lang 'yon masabi sa mukha niya.

Bigla naman pumasok sa utak ko si Bruce, I think I may have a little crush on him.

I don't know, I can tell that we clearly like each other's company. And the fact that he used to like me noon... it can come back, right? I don't know. I know I promised to myself I won't try love again after Xyler. That stupid guy just broke up with me 3 weeks before prom, saying that he already found someone better.

Ayaw ko lang maulit ang nakaraan... I don't want my heart to get broken once again by someone who I'll love so much.

I finished eating my lunch and went to the bathroom to fix myself. Wala naman akong masyadong ginawa ngayong araw pero ramdam ko sa katawan ko na malapit na itong bumigay. Sana kami ang unang magpresent at magpapaalam na ako na uuwi ako dahil masama pakiramdam ko.

Tutuloy pa ba ako sa meet up namin mamaya? It feels like I don't have any energy to drive there anymore. Medyo malayo kasi bahay ni Gwen at tinatamad ako magmaneho dahil masama pakiramdam ko, masakit katawan ko.

Baka pagdating ko doon ay dalhin naman nila ako sa ospital dahil sa panghihina ko.

Namumutla na ako nang gawin namin ang presentation at pagkatapos agad nito ay tumayo ako.

"I'm sorry, can I leave early. I am feeling really bad po and I need to take a rest." I told the Prof. at buti na lang na pumayag ito.

Pagka-uwi ko sa bahay ay tiningnan ko ang orasan. It was 1:45 pm at ang usapan namin ay magkikita kami mamayang 6 pm.

I rested my eyes in my bed and found myself falling asleep. I woke up and it's 5:57 pm. Wala na talaga akong choice kung hindi magpahinga na lang. Hindi naman na ako makakahabol.

Umupo ako ng maayos sa aking kama at natulala sa kawalan. Hindi ko na lang namalayan na ang aking luha ay unti unting tumulo. Siguro hindi ko na kaya pigilan ang sarili ko at kailangan ko nang maglabad ng emosyon dahil puno na ako.

I hugged both of my knees before sobbing.

I was about to try and compose myself again when my door flew open and I saw Bruce looking at me with worried eyes.

Agad naman ako umayos ng upo habang tumutulo pa rin ang aking luha at dahan dahan naman siyang lumapit sa akin at niyakap akl ng mahigpit. His arms wrapped around me feels so good. It feels like I'm secured as if nothing would ever happen to me.

Pinunasan niya naman ang mga luha ko at pinilit akong iharap sa kanya. "Stop crying, Elisha. You're prettier when your storms are calmed." he said and I chuckled lightly and took that as a compliment. No one has ever called me pretty before.

"I am not," I said before standing up and his arms are still wrapped around me. I could get used to this.

"What's our problem, hmm?" he asked and I just sighed before burying my head onto his chest. We stayed like that for a couple of minutes until I fully recovered.

"I just feel so stressed. My body aches and my head was spinning earlier. Kaya nga maaga akong umuwi eh." I told him at tumango tango naman siya, still willing to listen to me. "Just felt I needed a break."

He patted my head and gave it a kiss. Nagulat naman ako sa ginawa niya pero I stayed calm.

"You're okay, Elisha. Rest with me." he said and I smiled before nodding then hugged him tight again.

"Wait, ikaw, anong ginagawa mo dito?" tanong ko sa kanya at namula naman siya bago umiwas ng tingin. Is he blushing? He looks cute, what the heck!

"Uhm... you were never late when we meet up for the letters. I knew that you are going through a lot right now... and I don't want you to do what Jayce did... to himself." he said at ngumiti naman ako dahil may pake pala talaga siya sa'kin.

"I won't do that, Bruce. Don't worry."

Tumango naman siya sa'kin. We both lie in bed at napaisip naman ako. "Why did you choose me than our friends? You could just go to them na lang, it's more interesting doon."

He scoffed, "I care about you. I don't give a fuck about them. Besides, I'll only go there if hahabol ka din." sabi niya and I sughed before getting up to get my jacket, wallet and keys.

"Let's go then." I told him and he looked at my face for a few more seconds before standing up and held my hand. I didn't feel anything but it felt right.

He offered na mag isang sasakyan na lang kami para hindi na ako mapagod. While we were in the car we were just jamming out with a few songs we both like. Iniisip ko, mukhang alam ko naman na ang laman ng sulat ni Gwen eh. I know it would involve me and Xyler.

"Do you know what's my only reason why I kept on showing up for the letters?" he asked all of a sudden. I turned to him and raised a brow. "Because I get to see you again... and again. Ikaw lang ang tanging rason kung bakit gusto ko araw araw makipag kita sa inyo." agad naman naman ako namula at umiwas na lang ng tingin.

He texted our friends na sinundo niya ako at pag dating namin doon ay agad kami pinagtinginan ng mga kaibigan namin ng may kahulugan.

We both sat down beside them at hinintay namin si Bruce dahil may binili pa siya sa malapit na convenience store. When he arrived he gave me a sprite bottle and I thanked him.

After that binuksan na ni Gwen ang kanyang sulat.

---

Flashback

Jayce's POV

It was lunch time and we all were talking about random stuff. Bukas na ang prom namin and we are going to help the prom committee fix the gymnasium for tomorrow. Part ng community service naming pito dahil sa katarantaduhang ginawa namin 3 days ago.

I was about to go to the bathroom when I heard someone making out in the boy's bathroom. Muntikan na kong masuka pero naintriga ako dahil pamilyar yung boses.

"Stop... we should let her know first, before we do something more than making out."

Napaisip naman ako, pamilyar yung boses eh.

Wait, is that Gwen?

What the fuck? That's probably Elisha's ex she's kissing! At alam kong Xyler cheated on Elisha with Gwen. Simula dati naman kasi inggit na si Gwen na mayroon si Elisha na gwapong lalaki eh.

Tanga nga lang si Elisha dahil akala niya matino na si Xyler pero niloko siya. Sa simula naman mabuti si Xyler, he was a gentleman, helped Isha with her schoolwork, helped her parents and siblings. But the fact that he just cheated? That is the dumbest thing a guy could ever do to her.

Bakit kasi manhid siya? I am here for her, there was never a time I wasn't there for her when she needed me. We were both each other's support, but I guess she just see me as her best friend.

Should I go inside? But I already got into enough trouble, hindi ko na kakayanin ang lahat kapag nadamay pa ako ulit sa ganito.

Hindi na ako nakapag-cr at bumalik na lang sa mga kaibigan ko.

After class we all gathered in the gymnasium. Nagpalit na ako ng damit at nagsuot ng shirt na pwedeng madumihan. Marami kasi kaming aayusin dito sa gymnasium para bukas.

Marami pa nga din kaming gagawin bukas eh. We still have to go to class for 2 hours then prepare for pre-prom. Pero excited ako dahil maraming oras para makasama ko si Elisha. I would do anything to spend a lot of time with her.

Plano namin sa bahay ko magayos para bukas and my Mom is also eager to see Elisha.

Just the thought of her in her vivid red dress, excites me.

"Boys, put this under the basketball hoop." utos sa amin ng head ng prom committee. Sumunod naman kami at inilagay ang mini stage. We also put the large tarpaulin in place.

Nagsimula naman silang magpalobo ng mga balloons at kami naman ay inayos na namin ang mga table at upuan.

We finished after 3 hours of work at umuwi na kami. Sinamahan naman ako ni Elisha papunta sa bahay ko dahil gusto niya makita si Mommy.

"Good evening po, Tita." she greeted my Mom.

"Elisha, darling! Stay for dinner," she invited Elisha. Umiling naman si Idha before smiling. "No need na po, Tita. I have to come home for dinner with my family. Maybe next time po." she politely declined.

Tumango naman si Mommy, "Okay, anak. Be careful walking home, or maybe Jayce could take you home." my Mom said and she shook her head.

"'Wag na po, Tita. Una na po ako." she said. "See you tomorrow, Isha!"

Umalis na siya at nagpahinga na ako.

The next morning we all first finished our 2 hour class at sabay sabay na kami pumunta sa bahay ko.

When we arrived nakaayos na ang living room for us to chill in. My Mom helped the girls with their hair and make up.

After putting on some BB cream and powder on my face agad na akong nagpalit ng tuxedo ko. The girls were almost finished so we waited at the end of the staircase.

Isa isa bumaba sila Gwen at ang panghuli ay si Elisha. It's like she was walking down the stairs in slow motion and all I could see and hear is her heels clacking on the flooring.

Lumapit siya sa akin and smiled, her killer smile always gets me. She looks so beautiful it makes me want to kiss her.

"How do I look?" she asked while twirling for me to see her whole dress. That red dress on her fits her curves perfectly. She's flawless in my eyes. I just wished she were mine.

"You look stunning," I said and she smiled before leaning towards me. I placed my arms around her shoulders and looked at the camera that my Mom was holding.

After that we rode the limo we rented for today and drove off to our batch mate's house where the pre-prom would happen.

We all mingled with the people and took a lot of pictures with our dates. I was surprised to see Gwen without Xyler. Well... Xyler is nowhere to be found right now. Nasaan kaya siya?

Maybe fucking with other girls? But he just started his thing with Gwen a week ago! Napaka babaero talaga ng mokong na 'yon.

It was 6:30 pm and we all decided to go to our school. Pagpasok namin sa gymnasium mayroong nakapwesto na photographer so they took more pictures of us.

The gymnasium was already almost full with people and they already were dancing at the middle.

We first ate dinner and after dinner we were about to dance when someone covered Gwen's eyes. It was Xyler.

Laglag pangang tiningnan ni Elisha si Gwen at Xyler. "I forgot to tell everyone... Xyler's my date, and apparently my boyfriend." Gwen said and before we even reacted Elisha stormed out of the gymnasium. Lahat naman kami sumunod sa kanya, pumunta naman siya sa corridor.

She stopped in the middle and knelt down on the floor. We could hear the faint music from the gymnasium. Tumulo naman ang mga luha niya nang tingnan kami, agad ito tumayo at nagdire-diretso papunta kay Gwen.

She then slapped Gwen at agad naman sinabunutan ni Gwen si Elisha and before they killed each other, hinatak na ni Bruce palayo si Isha at si Xyler naman ay pumunta sa harap ni Gwen.

"Ano bang problema mo?" galit na tanong ni Xyler kay Isha and she just chuckled sarcastically. Agad ito lumapit kay Xyler at sinipa sa tyan.

"You had the fucking courage to ask me what my problem is when you cheated? That's one type of bullshit, Xyler." Elisha said before turning ti Gwen who was looking at her with a blank expression.

"You bitch never know what your limitations are. You fucking know that he was my boyfriend and you swept him from me? I mean okay lang naman, at least alam natin kung sino ang kabit." inirapan ni Elisha si Gwen at tatalikod na sana nang sabunutan ni Gwen ito.

Nasuntok naman ni Elisha si Gwen kaya napaupo ito. "So much for a friend like you." Isha soatted before walking back inside the gymnasium at kumuha ng red cup to drink some punch.

Padabog na umupo siya sa isang upuan at tinabihan ko naman siya. I was just observing her, not knowing how I should approach her.

Mahirap kasing kausapin si Elisha kapag mainit ang ulo, baka sigawan lang ako nito if I try to comfort or calm her down.

"Would you cheat?" she asked out of the silence and it took me a few seconds before answering. "No, I won't." I replied and she nodded.

"How is it that hard to not cheat? Just be fucking faithful and loyal to the person!" she shouted before finishing the drink.

"Yeah, but you can still find other guys that would treat you better." I told her and she leaned on my shoulders. Medyo bumagal na ang music kaya nagsslow dancing na ang mga tao.

Napansin ko rin na bumalik na sa loob ang iba naming kaibigan. Wala na nga lang si Gwen at Xyler.

"Someone told me that the person who often loves the hardest... are the ones who are hurt the most." I told her and she looked directly in my eye. I stroked her hair before tucking some part of it behind her ear so that I could see her full face.

Her glance was exchanging from my eyes to my lips. I slowly leaned in and... kissed her.

Fuck!

I finally kissed her.

She smiled before standing up at inaya ako para sumayaw. I'm not really fond of formal dancing because I find it cheesy, pero kung si Isha ang isasayaw ko I'll try my best in dancing.

She placed my hands on her waist and she placed hers on my neck. We danced and felt the rhythm. For the first time ever... I was enjoying life. I actually wanted to live another day because I am dancing with the girl that I love.

Bigla naman tumigil ang kanta sa aking isip at napako lang ang tingin ko kay Elisha. Her mascara was already slightly ruined because she cried earlier but that didn't make a difference because she's still pretty in my eyes.

"Everyone settle down and we'll announce the face of the night, and prom king and queen!" sambit ng emcee kaya bumalik kami sa kanya kanyang upuan. Naroon na din ang iba naming kaibigan.

Hindi naman sila naguusap dahil may awkward tension pa dahil sa nangyari kanina. Pero wala naman si Gwen kaya walang mangyayaring sabunutan session dito sa table namin.

"The face of the night is... Maddie Ann Levine!" agad naman kaming nagpalakpakan. But for me, Elisha deserves to be the face of the night.

She stood out tonight not like anyone.

"Our prom king 2021 is... Bruce Jordan Adler!" we all cheered him until he got up the stage and wore the crown. He actually is qualified for that crown because he actually looks handsome tonight.

"And our prom queen 2021... Elisha Cyra Solace!" agad naman akong natulala muna kay Isha bago palakpakan. I was so happy for her because she got the crown. She'll be graduating and has experienced being a prom queen.

But the fact that her partner right now is Bruce pisses me off. But... we kissed earlier. So I have the advantage? I don't know!

Baka nga friendly kiss lang 'yon eh.

They took photos before we all decided to go home. Pagkadating namin sa bahay ay umakyat kami ni Isha sa kwarto ko at nanahimik lang.

She said she wanted to spend the night here in my house because it's a weekend. Wala kaming pasok bukas.

She was taking off her make up pero nakita kong pagod na siya.

"Jayce ang sakit lang..." her voice sounded so soft. She's too vulnerable right now at naaawa ako sa kanya. She doesn't deserve this. Tangina Elisha, can't you tell that I fucking like you and think that it's best if we were just together because I know I can treat you better!

"Don't cry Elisha. I hate seeing you crying." I told her at pinunasan niya naman ang kanyang luha.

Elisha is my second love, my greatest love rather.

The first time I ever loved someone... it gave me trauma. Akala ko noon hindi na ako matututo pa magmahal pagkatapos noong babaeng 'yon. But I started noticing every single thing about my best friend. Elisha.

I was denying it way back because I thought I only enjoy her company and I liked her because she was the one there for me.

But I told myself that I don't just like her... I was in love with her already.

I realized that I'm in love when I find myself thinking about her at the most random times. Lahat na lang ng bagay naaalala ko siya. Whenever we talked to each other she could say anything and it could make ne smile.

I helped her unzip her dress before giving her a quick kiss on the lips.

"Isha, thank you for teaching me how to love." I told her and she was confused about everything. Naisip ko lang na baka hindi niya naman maalala ang lahat kinabukasan so better I do this now.

"You made love bearable for me." I said before I cupped her face and kissed her passionately.

This is the best feeling ever.

---

Present

Elisha's POV

Lumuluha ako habang binabasa ang sulat. Napaka manhid at bulag ko pala noon. I never noticed him and his feelings for me.

If we both were vlear with our feelings he would be alive right now and happy with me!

I could've taken care of him, made him feel loved and appreciated.

"I'm sorry, Elisha." Gwen told me and I just looked at her with a blank expression before looking away.

I don't have time right now to be mad. It's not worth it.

It's all up in the past and I don't see the need to look back on it. I sighed before turning to Bruce he was smiling at me and it somehow calmed me down.

My emotions were all over the place to be honest. I am sad, angry, tired, and lost. I don't know what to do right now.

"Matanong ko lang, did you two... fucked?" tanong ni Damon and my forehead creased before disregarding his question.

we are getting to the very end, only a few more, i promise. you may find this letter boring because we all know what happened there. gwen was so fed up with Elisha's ex boyfriend back then so she was willing to be the 3rd party. anyways the next letter would be... very interesting. it's the letter of my beloved, Isha.

you may be the person who i love and trust among the six of you but they also deserve what you done to ellie. we both know that she's not in states right now. you can find the letter at your property elisha. don't cry, only weak bitches do that.

Fuck.

Don't tell me he also included me. Tangina! Hindi naman nila kailangan malaman 'yon eh. It doesn't even affect him!

Kung naaawa ako kay Jayce, ngayon puno ako ng inis at galit. I thought we were keeping our secrets down to the grave? Bakit kailangan mo ito gawin?

I frustratedly stormed out of the room at sinundan ako ni Bruce. Oo nga pala, wala akong dalang kotse kaya kailangan magpahatid ako sa kanya.

"Look, Isha... we don't care about what you've done. We all know we done s lot more worst things." he told me and I just scoffed. You don't know what you're talking about, Bruce.

Even I wouldn't forgive myself for what I've done. It was such a dick move and I regret it so much.

"Can you drive me to the hospital where my Mom is confined right now? I promised her that I would visit." I told him and he nodded before silently driving.

When we arrived he asked if he should come with me or just stay down at the parking but I told him na sumama sa akin.

I want my Mom to know him. It's probably just a stupid little crush but I want him to be close to my Mom like Jayce.

Kilala naman ni Mommy mga kaibigan ko pero si Jayce lang ang kilalang kilala niya. I always bring him here sa bahay, minsan nga natutulog pa kami sa kwarto eh.

Pagpasok namin sa hospital room, I was shocked to see Kevin there. Lumingon siya kay Bruce and was about to punch him in the face when I spoke.

"If you touch him I'll break you," I said in a monotone kaya natakot naman ito.

I turned to my Mom at inilapit si Bruce, "Mom... this is Bruce. One of my friends back then from senior high." I introduced him.

"Good evening, Mrs. Solace. It was great to finally meet you again." he said formally before smiling at my Mom.

"Sus, 'wag na kayo mag ganyan pa. Boyfriend mo, Elisha?" diretsong tanong ni Mommy at hindi ko alam kung ano idasagot ko.

"Silence means yes." she said before laughing. "You know, Elisha. Life is short, live it to the fullest. You can go and love someone! Mukha namang matinong bata kaya pasado na 'yan sa'kin." she said at natawa naman kaming dalawa ni Bruce.

We talked about other stuff at sabi ni Mom ay madidischarged na siya in 2 days. That's a good thing.

Hindi ko naman na pinansin si Kevin at nagpahatid na lang pauwi sa aking bahay.

I was standing in front of the gate looking at Bruce. He slowly walked towards me and held my hand.

"I don't know how I gained courage to tell you this but..." he kissed me on the forehead and hugged me tight. "You don't know how much I've been waiting my whole damn life to tell you this.... 3 years, Elisha." he told me at nagtaka naman ako.

We were both staring at each other and I'm waiting for him to tell me everything.

"Mahal kita, Elisha Solace."