Elisha's POV

"Don't you have plans with your friends?"

I tie my hair up before continuing to write down some information on my notes about the article I just read.

Feeling ko nga male-late ako sa meet up namin dahil naghahabol ako ngayon ng other backlogs ko. It's weird for me to have backlogs but with what's going on right now I can't keep my mind on the right track.

Sasabog utak ko pag pinwersa kong ipasok ang lahat sa utak ko lalo na't sobrang daming tumatakbo ngayon dito. "They can wait dude," I answered my bestfriend. He was salty about the fact that me and the others have reunited and what seems to be is that we might have to see each other almost every day.

He sighed before walking towards me to fix my hair before sitting next to me, "I just hate the fact that you and Bruce have to breathe the same air in a room again." I could almost hear him roll his eyes. I just laughed before turning to him.

"Gusto mo bang sumama? I'm sure they won't mind another company." I said and his face lit up. Dati ko pang alam na gusto ako ni Kevin pero hindi ko lang siya kinokompronta dahil ayaw ko na maging awkward kami.

"Okay," he said before getting his hoodie and wore it. Nang matapos ko ang ginagawa ko ay inayos ko na rin ang gamit ko bago magpaalam kay mommy. Kev was the one to drive us there at pagka-park at patay ng makina ay rinig ko na agad sila.

Kumpleto na sila roon at gaya ng sinabi ko, ako nga ang na-late. Nagsisigawan na naman sila, for fucks sake can't they survive an hour without shouting at each other? Geez.

"Oh kumalma na ang lahat, ano na naman ang pinag-aawayan niyo?" inagaw ko ang atensyon ng lahat at nagsitahimik naman na sila.

"Isha, you're here! Thank God, kanina pa sila nagaaway dito na tila mga aso't pusa." Gwen told me and I just smiled at her before looking at everyone.

"Haven't we all made a deal to not fight about the past? Please wag na tayo maging historical. We're just doing this to know why our friend decided to end his life." I said and they all nodded.

"Hindi pa ba malinaw kung bakit ginawa ni Jayce 'yon?" Bruce asked. "Based on the letter we read yesterday clearly what's going to happen is that he'll refresh us from everything bad that we involved him in." he scoffed and I saw how Kev glared at him.

Napansin naman iyon ni Bruce kaya sinalubong nito ang tingin niya at nakipag-titigan sila sa isa't isa.

"Who's this new blood?" tanong ni Damon kaya ipinakilala ko si Kev.

"Everyone this is Kevin, Kevin this is everyone. I'm sure wala naman kayong pake kung magsama ako ng kaibigan 'di ba?"

Masama pa rin ang tingin ni Bruce sa kanya, "Oh please, he's just your boyfriend huh? Never thought that you'll manage to like someone after you got dumped by your ex." he said at agad siyang sinuntok ni Kev. Dumugo ang labi nito at inawat ko naman sila.

"Ano ba? 'Wag niyo kong simulan kung ayaw niyo magsisi!" sigaw ko at lumayo naman na si Bruce. Bumalik kami sa sari-sariling kotse at napagdesisyonan na magkita-kita na lang sa bahay ni Maddie.

Nang makarating kami rito maraming mga ala-alang bumalik sa utak ko. We got drunk, we got high in this house. It's because Maddie's parents were always not at home. They usually are on dinners, or family business that they need to attend to. 

Pinpasok kami ng bahay and as usual tahimik rito at ang tanging ingay lang ang naririnig namin ay ang mga yabag ng aming mga paa. We stopped at the living room at tiningnan ang isa't isa. 

Saan naman namin makikita ang sulat dito? 

"I think it's best for us to split up to find the letter faster." Maddie suggested and we all agreed before starting search up the whole house. Naglakad-lakad kami ni Kev at wala kaming mahanap na kahit ano. Wow Jayce, where did you hide the letter?

"Isipin mo nga Damon, ano yung ginawa mong katarantaduhan dito?" tanong ni Chris said at nakita kong masyadong malayo ang kaisipan ni Damon. Ano kaya ang iniisip niya? Is it something connected to what happened here months back?  

Hindi sumagot si Damon and instead he went to the kitchen to get water from the fridge and after that umakyat siya sa kwarto ng kapatid ni Maddie. Pagbukas ng pinto ay nakita namin ang pagka-gulat nito nang makita si Damon. 

Nagtaka naman kami, Elle had experience some trauma that led her to stop talking. She's been seeing her therapist but it looks like she still can't talk huh? Poor girl. 

"Guys this is Elle, I'm sure namiss niya kayong lahat. Right, little sis?" Maddie told her sister and Elle just looked at us with a frightened expression. "Don't mind us, we're just looking for something that can be here in your room. This will be quick." 

After a few minutes nakita na ni Bruce ang sulat at naroon ito sa ilalim ng kama ni Elle. "Weird, bakit kaya ito nandito?" tanong ni Gwen before walking out of the room. 

We regrouped at the second floor living room at ang sulat ay nasa lamesa. We decided to not read it immediately and wait for pizza to come and for the booze to arrive. Ngayon lang ulit ako iinom, at sana naman maka-uwi pa ako ng buo mamaya.

After a few minutes of waiting dala na ni Gwen at Bruce and pagkain at inumin para sa amin. We figured that we needed fuel while reading the letter because damn the last letter was long. This might even take us an hour or so to process kaya matagal pa talaga ang pagsasama naming lahat. 

"Are you really sure that drinking is good with them? Naaalala mo naman siguro mga ginawa nila sa'yo noon 'di ba?" Kev whispered at mukhang narinig 'yon ni Bruce kaya umirap siya. 

"She was already fine before you even entered the picture, dumbass. She enjoyed our presence, I'm ever surprised that she managed to stick up with you even though you are a boring soul." walang tigil na sabi ni Bruce at nakita kong kinuyom ni Kev ang kamao niya bago salubungin ang tingin nung isa. 

"Anong sabi mo?!" sigaw nito at kinwelyohan si Bruce pero bago pa sila magsapakan ay inawat ko na sila. "Ano bang problema mo kay Kevin? Hindi ka naman inaano pero kanina ka pa affected sa presensya niya." inis na sabi ko at umiwas na lang siya ng tingin.

We did our opening shot before reading the letter.

---

Flashback

Jayce's POV

"Party at Maddie's house tonight, 8 pm. Punta ka ah!"

Habang inaayos ang gamit tiningnan ko ang orasan bago lingunin muli si Isha. "Subukan ko, baka kasi hindi ako payagan nila dad." I told her at agad napawi ang ngiti sa kanyang labi. I sighed before smiling.

"Sige na nga, pero ikaw sasalo pag napagalitan ako ah." I told her and she smiled before hugging me and kissed me sa cheeks. Nagulat ako doon pero ginawa niya yon as if that it's casual for her to give me a kiss. 

May boyfriend kasi siya, yung Samson na 'yon. Mahanging lalaki na hindi marunong makuntento sa isa. Dati ko pa 'yon napapansin eh, that Xyler has been doing something different behind Elisha's back. 

"Yey! See you later, I'll text you!" At nagpaalam na siya at hawak kamay na umalis ng classroom. Oh how I wish to be your man instead, Elisha.

Tinapos ko muna ang mga activities ko and did an advance reading for our upcoming test sa library before going to the mall. 

Habang naglalakad para salubungin si Gwen dahil nagpapasama siya sa mall ay nakita ko si Damon pati ang isang babae na kamukha ni Maddie. Is that Maddie's sister? I don't want to assume so I just went on walking. 

Anyways, Gwen said that she wants to look hot for Bruce. Poor girl doesn't know that he is currently attracted to Isha.

I don't even get how every single guy is in love with her and yet she chose to like someone like Xyler. That asshole doesn't even deserve one bit of Elisha, I could be a better boyfriend that him! Bulag rin kasi yung babaeng 'yon and she tend to focus on the guys' looks than their substance which was annoying.

"How about this, Jayce?" she asked and showed me a drawstring dress and I just gave her my feed back; she ended up buying it because I told her that Bruce will like it. I don't get her sometimes to be honest. Bruce is not even above average and is a better friend than a relationship partner.

"Alam mo pag hindi ko naipahiwatig ang dinadamdam ko kay Bruce aagawin ko ang boyfriend ni Elisha, he looks hotter." she said and I looked at her with disgust. "Wow, Gwen. You're such a good friend!" I said sarcastically and she just laughed before we parted ways.

8 pm pa naman ang party and it was 6:30 so I still have time to chill for a bit. Tatakasan ko rin kasi mga magulang ko or let's just say I'll tell them a different excuse para payagan akong umalis ng gabi.

I wore a black shirt and gray sweatpants layered with a varsity jacket. My basic outfit for a party. I got my keys and wallet before going downstairs, "Mom, I'm heading out." I said and she gave me a confused look.

"This hour? Who are you with?"

"Elisha," I smiled.

My mom knows that I like her but what she doesn't know is that she already has the man of heart.

"My baby has grown up, you're taking her on a date? That's sweet. Okay have fun and be careful." Oh how I wish to be her date for the party tonight, mom. Tumango na lang ako bago lumabas at nagdrive papunta doon sa bahay nila.

I parked my car and as expected the house looks wild already. A lot of teenagers making out on the porch, puking at the grass, inhaling drugs. A typical party of a Levine. 

I walked in while my hands are in my pocket and I observe as the people dance and get wasted. Wish I could dip this party but Isha would get mad at me. Speaking of her the door had opened and she looked so stunning wearing a maroon drape silk dress with a cropped white fur coat. 

Damn she's hot.

Marami siyang binating tao bago makarating sa akin she gave me a kiss on the cheeks before pulling me to go get drinks. 

"Where's your boyfriend?" I asked and she just shrugged before taking a gulp on her beer. "Don't know, he said he was here already but I can't seem to find him." she said before weakly smiling. Yeah, he may be out there fucking with other girls. 

"Well, on the brighter side I'm here. I can be your date wink wink." I said as a joke and she laughed before pulling me up to the room where we found all of our friends except Gwen. Where the hell even is she?

Umupo kami doon sa lapag in a circle at nag usap muna sa kung ano ano. We were laughing and tipsy which was a normal thing for us. "Ikaw Jayce, do you like someone right now?" Christoph asked and Elisha looked at me also curious.

I smiled with the thought of Isha on my mind. "Huy, mayroon nga. Spill mo naman!" sigaw ni Maddie and I just shrugged. "You don't have to know. Besides, I don't have a chance with that girl." I said and Elisha just scoffed.

"Oh please Jayce, you're the best boy I could ever think of. The girl that you like is clearly dumb if she doesn't see your worth." she said and I laughed. Then you're dumb Elisha? We ate pizza and finished 2 more cases of beer. 

"Bili, 7 seconds walang malisya." sabi ni Maddie at tumingin kay Bruce at Elisha. Agad naman ako napairap, bro she has a boyfriend and Bruce clearly wants her. Kahit na tarantado si Xyler at halatang tinatarantado si Isha sa relasyon nila kabilang pa rin siya sa relationship. 

Before they even kissed ay nagpaalam si Damon na lalabas siya saglit para kumuha ng beer at nagtaka naman ako dahil hindi naman gaanong mahilig si Damon sa mga beer, he prefers hard alcohol. Yung sure na magkakaroon siya ng tama.

Bumalik ang atensyon ko kay Elisha at Bruce and they were both leaning in for a kiss. Woah, he got what he was long wanting for. To own Elisha's lips. Damn, I wish it was me!

Before their lips even parted agad naman akong tumayo at nagpaalam para magpahingin. I can't stand seeing the girl of my dreams kissing someone else.

Napasok ako sa isang kwarto, dahil bukas ito at medyo malamig dito. Mahangin kasi dito, at napansin kong nakabukas ang bintana.

The room was gray and white at lumabas naman ako sa bintana para umupo sa bubong to catch the starry night.

I was about to go back to join my friends when I heard two people come in. They're probably drunk people kaya hindi na nila napansin na bukas ang bintana at may tao roon.

I didn't make any noise para hindi nila ako mapansin. As much as I didn't want to eavesdrop, wala na akong magagawa dahil wala naman akong mapupuntahan pa. Ayaw ko namang ilagay ang buhay ko sa peligro kaya hindi ko gagawing tumalon sa bahay na ito.

Mapapagalitan lang din ako ng mga magulang ko kaya 'wag na lang. I don't need them scolding me again, sumasakit lang ulo ko.

"Are we going to do it?" alanganing tanong ng babae. "Yeah, I want to fuck you." sagot ng lalaki sa kanya at agad naman akong nagtaka. Teka, boses 'yon ni Damon ah? Alam kong hindi dapat ako tumingin pero kailangan ko malaman kung sino ang kasama niyang babae. 

Para maasar ko mamaya.

When I looked it was Maddie's sister! What the fuck? 

Damon is going to rape her sister. Kasi halata naman sa tono ng boses ni Rielle, ang kapatid ni Maddie, na ayaw niya naman ata makipag-talik rito.

Pero gago kasi 'tong si Damon. Kung ano ang gusto niya, dapat maibigay sa kanya. Dahil kung hindi, he'll force you to do it. 

Sometimes I keep on asking myself why I'm friends with people that has their flaws or  bad sides, kasi hindi naman ako ganong tao kagaya nila eh. But then again I'm not a saint, I still do shitty things.

Kahit tarantado sila, mahal ko pa din sila kasi naroon sila sa tabi ko sa mga panahong hirap na hirap ako. Kaya nga hindi ko na alam kung ano ang gagawin ko sa buhay ko kapag nawala sila o di kaya nasira ang grupo namin.

Kasi sila ang rason kung bakit may ibig sabihin ang buhay ko. They make my life thrilling and exciting; and that's why I keep on making them happy kasi sila din naman ang dahilan kung bakit may napipintang ngiti sa aking mga labi.

"Stop, Damon. I'm not ready yet..." Rielle said pero may narinig naman akong malakas na kalampag. "You're going to let me fuck you, Rie." he said in a monotone.

"No please.." bigla namang sinampal ni Damon si Rielle. What the fuck, bro? This is so wrong! As much as I want to stop them, it's like my feet is glued on the roof. Hindi ko magawang gumalaw at hindi ko alam kung bakit.

Shit, hindi 'to tama eh!

"Before I fuck the shit out of you, drink your shot, baby." he said seductively and after a few minutes narinig ko na bumagsak sa lapag ang baso. 'Di ako mapapatawad ng konsensya ko dahil wala akong ginagawa eh.

"AHHH!" sigaw ni Rielle and the next thing I knew is that they went silent. I heard Damon mumbling, clearly frustrated.

"Fuck bahala na!" Damon said at ang susunod na narinig ko ay ang pagbukas sara ng pinto. Siguro wala nang tao sa loob kaya bumuntong hininga ako bago pumasok muli sa loob at nagulat na lang ako nang makita ko si Rielle sa kama.

She passed out? Lumapit ako sa kanya  to check if she's breathing, delikado na, 'di ko alam baka sinaksak na pala siya ni Damon after taking advantage of her. You don't know how capable he is of doing bad things.

I was about to call Maddie but then bumukas ang pinto at naroon si Elisha at Maddie na nakatayo, at kitang kita ang gulat sa kanilang mukha. Agad naman ako nilapitan ni Maddie at sinampal.

"How dare you take advantage of my sister!" she said as she threw me out of the room. 

"Tangina mo Jayce, we're friends. How could you do this to me? Anong ginawa mo, why is she bleeding?" tanong niya sa akin at wala akong naisagot. Her sister is probably a virgin, that's why it bled because Damon forced her.

Isha was looking at me with a disappointed look. Fuck! "Look, it's not what it looks like." I said trying to explain it to them pero sinampal na naman ako ni Maddie. 

Wala na akong choice kung hindi tanggapin na lang at akuhin ang ginawa ni DamonFuck that dude, I swear. He really is something that you don't want to get in touch with romantically. Kasi alam ko na isa lang ang gusto ni Damon. 

 Sex. 

 There's basically a thing we called the 'steps of Damon'. 'Yan ang mga ginagawa niya para makuha ang isang babae. 

Step one: Stare at her until she stares back. 

I saw him and Rielle exchanging glances at the cafeteria. So that's why he was continuesly seeing someone secretly at the junior high building. 

Step two: Approach the chick and flirt to get their number. 

I saw him do his ways, alam ko din na may pinabigay siyang note sa isang kaklase ni Rielle eh. I'm really observant and nothing can escape my eagle eyes. I see almost everything, that's why I know every secret that my friends keep. 

 Step three: Let her take you to their place. 

This party, he took this as a place kung saan magagawa niya ang last and final step. 

Step four: Fuck her. 

'Yan ang laging ginagawa ng isang Damon Rein Ford para makuha ang isang babae.

Lahat ng tao sa party ay pinauwi ni Maddie at kinabukasan habang nasa third period ay pinatawag ako ng principal. Hindi naman ako kinabahan, it's not like it's my first time getting called here.

Minsan lagi akong napapatawag kasama mga kaibigan ko pero nakakapagtaka lang dahil ako lang ang pinatawag. Di hamak na ako ang pinaka mabait sa amin kaya bakit ako lang?

Pagpasok ko roon ay nakita kong nakatayo si Daddy, Maddie, Rielle and their parents. Detective Smith was also there taking notes and reading something. "Hello Mr. Morza. Do take a seat please." Umupo ako doon sa tabi ni Maddie at napansin kong hindi nagsasalita si Rielle at mukhang takot na takot pa.

"We know what you did at a party. It is said that you... raped Mr. and Mrs. Levine's child." the principal had a hard time saying that. I sighed before I tried to explain.

"I didn't do it--" before finishing my sentence I felt a hand on my cheek. 

"That's pure bullshit!" Maddie bursted at agad naman siya sinuway ng Mom niya. "Language, Maddie."

"Okay look, whatever happened to Rielle... I'm really sorry about that. But ask Damon, he was the one who did it... Tell them Rielle." I turned to her but she wouldn't speak.

"She won't talk because of the trauma you did to her." umirap si Maddie sa akin at agad naman ako nasuntok ni Daddy. Agad naman siya inawat ng Dad ni Maddie. 

"I should've disowned you a long time ago. You're just a fucking embarrassment to our family!" Dad shouted before leaving the room. Hinawakan ko naman ang hiwa ng aking labi, ang sakit niya. 

Lumabas naman na si Dad at naiwan kami doon. "Very well... as much as we hate to say this but you are suspended for 2 weeks. 40 hours of community service." the principal declared at umalis na silang lahat  at naiwan ako doon na nakatulala sa aking mga kamay.

I was about to leave the office nang biglang pumasok si Damon na hingal na hingal. "Principal, I did it. I had sexual intercourse with Maddie's sister last night without her consent and forced her. I take full responsibility with my actions." yumuko si Damon at pansin kong tumutulo na ang kanyang mga luha.

"I see that what Mr. Morza was saying was true... I'm afraid that you have to face a lot of consequences. 2 weeks of suspension. 40 hours of community service. 3 weeks of juvenile hall. Lahat ng parusa kay Mr. Morza ay lifted. Pero siya ang magdadala sa'yo ng hand outs ng mga lesson to keep up even if you are suspended and in juvenile hall." sabi ng principal sa kanya at tumango ako.

Lumabas na ako papunta para sa subject ko nang hawakan ni Damon ang palapulsuhan ko. "Just don't tell anyone I did it, tell Maddie na hindi mo ginawa and someone else did it. Magdahilan ka, kaya mo na 'yon. Also tell our friends that I am in a family vacation somewhere in the U.S. and will be gone for a month." sambit niya sa akin at tumango tango na lang ako.

"Good luck," ayan lang ang tanging lumabas sa bibig ko. 

After class ay nagkita kami ng iba naming kaibigan at ang kulang lang ay si Damon. "So, what is a rapist doing here?" mataray na tanong ni Gwen and I scoffed.

"Haven't I told you that I didn't do it? Tinext na ng principal ang parents mo, Maddie. Hindi ako ang gumawa." sabi ko sa kanila. They all looked at each other before welcoming me again to our group. 

I explained to them that Damon had an emergency and have to leave town.

Pagkauwi ko sa aking bahay naramdaman ko ulit ang suntok ni Daddy. I tasted my own blood and I looked at him with dark eyes.

"Ano lalaban ka na ngayon? You pathetic little kid who only does things that ruin my fucking family." kinuyom ko na ang aking kamao pero hindi ko nagawa na suntukin siya. Maybe because part of me is still afraid of him.

"That's what I thought." he said before ordering me to get him some beer. After that umakyat ako sa aking kwarto at napaluhod na lang dahil sa panghihina.

I'm so fucking tired of my Dad doing those shitty things to me! Lumuha na ako pero wala akong nagawa. Ang tanging kakampi ko lang ay ang sarili ko. 'Yon na lang ang maasahan ko ngayon.

---

Present

Elisha's POV

"What the hell, Damon?!"

Agad naman nagalit si maddie at pinag-sampal sampal si Damon but he was already into tears while we were only looking at him disgustedly. 

"You are such a perverted moron, Damon." I said and they all murmured. 

But come to think of it they all are sucking up with Damon's case while I only thought of Jayce's situation. Lagi na lang siyang nasisisi sa mga bagay na hindi niya naman ginawa. 

And all the stress, pressure they gave Jayce. Lalo na sa abusive father niya, he's such an asshole. I feel bad for Jayce, kasi napaka selfless niya. He helps all of us while he keeps his problems to himself only.

"Maddie, gagawin ko ang lahat para mapatawad mo ako. Please lang, let's just continue with the letter, and find out why Jayce did take his life." sambit ni Damon and they all agreed.

Ako naman malakas na ang kutob ko kung paano ito matatapos. I already know why he did it. Based on the letters we have read... it's already clear to me.

hmm, since you all are still reading up until letter  number three. well guess what, you are nowhere near done. there are 5 more letters, but im sure after them the case isn't still done. marami pa kayong pagdadaanan bago ulit bumalik sa kalmado ang mga buhay niyo. if you are even smart enough, alam niyo na dapat kung bakit nangyari ang lahat ng ito. pero mukhang mga bobo pa rin kayo at ang tanging pake niyo lang ay ang sarili niyo. all of you weren't really aware of  your surroundings or even the people  that care about all of you. but guess what, you're lucky that i did care about you six, because if  not  you're probably spending your time in jail. 

you're all in luck, bruce you're next. find the letter at my old locker in our high school. make sure to be quiet because security are going to get 'ya.

"The hell? Jayce wants us to fucking break in our old school?" di makapaniwalang sabi ni Christoph. Napaisip naman ako kung ano ang maaaring ginawa ni Christoph noon. 

I could think of many things as to what he did. 

Agad naman nanlaki mata ko dahil mukhang alam ko na kung ano ang ginawa niya. But I called it quits muna dahil pagod na pagod na ako.

"Regroup ulit bukas, this time sa school na natin. 12 am, para hindi tayo mahuli." sabi ko bago umalis kasama si Kevin. Bumalik kami sa bahay and he tucked me in bed.

"Hey, are you okay? Do you want me to come with tomorrow?" he asked and I smiled before shaking my head. "Maybe next time, you still have a ton of things to do." I told him and he nodded.

"Rest up, Isha." he winked before giving me a peck on the lips.

Well at least there's still something good about my life.