Chapter 16 || The Conflict of Unsaid Feelings

"What happened, Annie? Why are you so gloomy?" asked a concerned Aarush. He had been observing how his usually chirpy and cheerful sister, was upset and down, when everyone around her was so jovial.

"Nothing, Aaru," said Anaisha, shaking he head. "Why would I be gloomy when it's my elder brother's marriage? I'm actually a little tired with the wedding preparations. Just need a little rest that's it."

Passing him a fake smile, she hoped that her brother didn't probe her more. Simply because she knew in her heart, what Aarush had said was true. Everyone around her was filled with so much happiness and joy, but only if she could feel it. Though, she was happy and excited, but an unknown pain was bothering her, for only God knows since when and why.

"Er ... okay. Take rest haan."

"Sure, I will."

"But you sure na, you aren't bothered with something? If you are then you can talk to me about it. You know na I'm always there for you, Annie," said Aarush, not convinced by Anaisha's reply.

Anaisha pursed her lips and seriously contemplated on telling the truth to Aarush. But then it hit her, that she, herself didn't know what the real reason behind her gloominess was. It didn't make any sense to tell Aarush anything when she wasn't sure herself.

"Yes, Aaru, there's nothing wrong. I'm just exhausted," said Anaisha, partially telling the truth. She indeed was exhausted, after all, emotional and mental stress is more tiring and physical stress.

"Okay. Take rest, Annie," said Aarush, pinching her cheek.

Giving her one more concerned look, he left from there. Being her twin and closest sibling, he knew her just too well and was sure that she was lying. He even knew the reason behind her sadness but decided against probing her, which wasn't the easiest thing to do. Seeing his otherwise happy sister so dull, he really wanted to make her speak her out to him. But that wasn't right, nor helpful for what he and others were upto.

She'll be fine, he assured his heart, knowing well that in few days, everything would be fine.

As he left, Anaisha went and joined her eldest brother Aarav, who was busy on a call with his to-be wife, Dr. Leher Sehgal. She settled beside Aarav and observed him as he talked lovingly to his fiancée.

"Yeah, I know ... my mom's going nuts here ... yeah, yeah, I know you adore your mother-in-law but she's really driving us all nuts with packing and preparations ... okay, okay, you're right ... "

Her lips curled into a small smile as she heard her brother talk to Leher, who undoubtedly was one of Anaisha's favourite people. And also, Leher and Aarav's love story was Anaisha's second favourite.

Batch mates at first, Aarav and Leher met each other during their internship in NLHRC and soon fell in love. Not love at first sight, they were opposites who first became friends and then gradually fell head over heels for each other. And like every love story, they had multiple issues to tackle, from ego clashes to their different personalities, from misunderstanding to long distance relationship. But they survived it all, with their immense love and devotion for each other and unbreakable trust. And Anaisha adored them a lot for this.

She continued to watch her brother talk for few minutes before leaving for her room. Her room was no less than a mess as she had to pack her clothes and stuff by night, as tomorrow she'd be leaving for her brother's marriage, which along with the other functions of marriage, was supposed to take place in Manali, Himachal Pradesh.

Though, she had to finish packing clothes, she decided to sleep instead. Lying down on her bed, she closed her eyes, trying very hard to shut out everything that was going on in her mind. But it was vain, as her mind only wanted to think about the one person, who was the main reason behind her state ... Kabir Thapar! Kabir, who was the main reason behind the indescribable pain she was feeling.

For last one month, all she could feel was this pain that Kabir's aloofness and detached attitude was inflicting on her, about which he seemed just oblivious. What started as slight change in Kabir's behaviour, ended up distancing him from her, for reasons unknown to Anaisha. Over the last one month, he had gradually distanced himself from her, citing busy schedule.

But Anaisha was smart enough to guess there was something more to it than what Kabir was showing. What hurt her more was that she was missing him around herself, and he didn't care at all.

And this made her feel an array of emotions from desolation, irritation and confusion. Desolation, because she missed his caring nature; irritation, because she couldn't bear his aloofness and coldness; and confusion, because she didn't know why he was behaving like this or what was the reason for his behaviour.

It was hurting her so severely that all she could think of was Kabir and the time that she had spent with him. But the longing for him, which she considered friendly, was a worrisome issue itself as she didn't know whether it was really for a friend or what Leher had told her when she had cornered her during one of family dinner few days back, for a romantic lover.

"Annie, don't mind, baby, but do you have some feelings for Kabir? I mean the way you are upset nowadays, it just made me wonder if the distance between you and Kabir is the reason you've been quite down? You know, like lovelornness. I'd seen you cry in the cafeteria the other day. So I was wondering whether it's just friendship or something more like relationship," said Leher, vaguely hesitant.

"Oh no, Bhabhi," said Anaisha promptly, "There isn't anything like that. I'm just tired, you know wedding shopping and preparations, that's it. And Kabir's avoiding me then that's his problem, not mine. And no, there's no lovelornness, I just miss my best friend, who didn't even give me a reason before distancing himself from me. But I'm okay, I'm cool. I had friends before him and still have friends after he broke off his friendship with me. It's not like my life depends on Kabir and his friendship."

"Okay, baby, I get your point. And I'm happy to know that you're unaffected by Kabir's behaviour. I don't know what's wrong with him," said Leher, understanding well what Anaisha was unable to see.

"Yes, me too," said Anaisha.

"Okay," said Leher and left to join others, knowing well what Anaisha was trying to deny was indeed lovelornness.

Annie opened her eyes and stared at the ceiling. She couldn't understand why Leher thought that she had feelings for Kabir, when he was just a friend, or actually a best friend. And then Aarush had also asked her if something was bothering her. Had they both guessed something she was yet to know, she couldn't decide.

Could it be true, do I really have some feelings for Kabir, Anaisha wondered. Of course, there was no doubt that she missed him miserably. His silence and indifferent behaviour toward her affected her severely, which sometimes made her cry because she couldn't bear it. He was special for her and his coldness was indeed painful.

Enough now, I won't cry for someone who don't even care about me, Anaisha resolved.
If he didn't want to hang out with her then she too wouldn't be bothered with this. Her life didn't depend on his friendship or him, she didn't depend on him. She'd be happy and enjoy her brother's wedding to fullest, even if Kabir would be a part of it too. She won't let him affect her. She'd be strong and unaffected by his presence.

With this resolve, she started packing her clothes. After an hour, when everything was packed, she lied down again and soon fell into deep slumber, feeling slightly better.

But maybe what she perceived, was only what she was being shown. Perhaps because Kabir himself was doing it to keep her away from himself and protect her from the pain that he, himself was suffering from.

If Anaisha was saturnine with his silence, then Kabir was forlorn with her absence around himself. If she was severely dejected with his aloofness, then he too wasn't any good without her.

But he had no other choice than to be this way. He couldn't afford to get both of their hearts broken, just to feel the transient joy of togetherness. The reality of relationships that he had learnt as a child, were enough to be treated as a valid reason for his detachment with Anaisha.

Yet it weakened him at times, not the distance, but the helplessness that he felt. For the first time in 29 years of his existence, Dr. Kabir Thapar didn't know why was he unable to close himself inside his fortress again, like every time he did whenever the situation turned emotionally unfavorable for him.

And maybe that's why, when confronted by Shaina, all he could do was a reply which was more of an assurance to his own self than an answer to Shaina's query.

"Of course not, Shaina, there's nothing of this sort. You're just over thinking all this. It's just my hectic working hours because of which I don't spend time with her or anyone else. And moreover we both have different friend circle so I can't always hang out with her." said Kabir in a stoic manner, but Shaina had guessed the hidden truth in this.

Kabir had said this enough times to make it sound like the truth, but Shaina had stayed quiet, knowing well what Kabir was trying to do. It was only when Kabir had disclosed his decision to relocate to Sydney, when she finally broke the silence. Along with her, Aarav, who had been a silent spectator, too had broken his long kept quietude.

"You're trying to run away from her, right? Don't even try to deny it! I've seen the same pain and longing in your eyes, that one only feel when away from their romantic interest. I won't say anything further, just one thing don't push people away from yourself. One day you'll regret! Take your time and sort out your issues before it's too late!" said Shaina, hurt with the way Kabir was ruining himself and his life.

At this point, Aarav, who had been silent till now, meekly added, "I don't know, Bir, what you think about this whole situation, but I'm still firm on my earlier stance. I would never mind you getting involved with my sister, especially after knowing how much you affect her. My Chhoti has never been this much miserable after losing a friend that she is now. Think again about your decision, maybe things could be different. But then again, it's your life and your decisions, I can only give advices. I cannot impose my wishes on you. Even friends have limits and I respect mine."
Just like last time, there was a look in Aarav's eyes, which Kabir now understood was his trust for Kabir, which he hoped would make Kabir understand that he was perfect for Anaisha.

The hopeful words from his best friends, left Kabir astounded and surprised. He didn't even know how to react to it, his mind already full of chaos and mayhem. Thus, he refrained himself from giving any reply to his friends, which both of his friends didn't mind, understanding his state.

This confrontation with his two closest friends, both of who had never interfered in his life before, made Kabir realise how wrong his decision was. But then again, the little suffering that Anaisha was going through now was better than a lifetime of torment, he had assured himself. Anaisha was just like a susceptible porcelain doll that didn't deserve a man like him, wrecked and doleful, she deserved someone who could love her unconditionally, without any traces of pain and sorrow. And Kabir could only give her a sorrowful love.

Yet despite his decision, Kabir couldn't stop himself from thinking about Anaisha. It seemed ironical as he was the same guy who used say that he would never fall in love. But just one girl made him go back on his words and fall so deeply in love that now nothing could help him. The same love that he considered as a wastage of time, was urging him to go break his promise and spend his time with the girl his heart was beating for. Yet, he couldn't do so!

It took everything in him to not break his vow and confess his love to Anaisha, who he wasn't even sure if reciprocated his feelings or not. And like it's said, the more you try to ignore something, the more your mind thinks about it. The same was with Kabir. He couldn't stop thinking about Anaisha, her antics, craziness, cuteness, chirpiness, attitude, tantrums, anger, infact her everything, which made him fall even more in love with her and break all over again.

And if this all wasn't enough, then he had to endure the pain of watching Anaisha go away from him. He had to watch someone else try filling his place in Anaisha's life, and this was surely tormenting for Kabir, who wasn't even strong enough to bear it.

The worst part, of course, was knowing who that person was. Nikhil Malhotra! The only guy whose name was enough to boil a calm Kabir's blood. The pain that Kabir was going through, doubled every time he saw Nikhil with Anaisha, giving her hugs and forehead kisses, which Anaisha didn't object, much to Kabir's chagrin, who didn't even notice that Anaisha's considered Nikhil's gestures as of a friend.

Still there was some relief for him, as Anaisha hadn't completely let Nikhil replace him in her life. She was never her true self around Nikhil as she was when she was with Kabir. And Kabir couldn't help but feel happy about this, though it was temporary as he would soon go away from her, and maybe in his absence, she might just let Nikhil take Kabir's place and get involved with him.

Once Aarav's wedding was over, Kabir along with his GM would leave for Sydney, Australia. Away from Anaisha, away from his unrequited love, away from the pain of watching the girl he loved love someone else, away from the suffering. Atleast, that's what he believed.

But it wasn't just Anaisha and Kabir who were suffering, along with them Nikhil was suffering as well. His fault being only two, the soft corner that he had for Anaisha since the very first day and the cold shoulder that he had developed for Kabir in envy. These two faults were much reasonable for him to land on the same boat of lovelornness as Kabir and Anaisha. Yet, his state was more of his own fault, unlike the other two.

While Kabir and Anaisha both were the victims of circumstances, Nikhil had foolishly led himself to a heartbreak by trying to replace Kabir in Anaisha's life. But he had soon realised that it was vain and fruitless, as Anaisha wasn't lamenting for losing a friend, it was more of heartbreak, which Nikhil was sure Anaisha wasn't aware of.

And a conversation with Rhea soon made it clear to him that both, Kabir and Anaisha, were in love with each other, but torn apart by Kabir's fears and Anaisha's oblivion. The same conversation, also led them to find a solution for the problematic pair, as well.

A few days back, after collecting files, Nikhil was going back to Anuj's office when he found Rhea sitting on the visitor's chair near the reception. From the look on her face, she seemed crestfallen and dispirited, which surprised Nikhil as Rhea wasn't the glum type.

"What happened, Rhea? Why are you looking so upset? Is everything alright?" asked Nikhil concernedly.

Rhea, who hadn't noticed Nikhil till he spoke, became startled at first. Recovering soon, she replied, "No, everything's fine."

But Nikhil didn't buy that and again probed, "C'mon now, Rhea, tell me, what's wrong? You aren't the sort to sit this grimly. You know you can share anything with me."

Rhea didn't speak for a few minutes, contemplating on sharing her problem with Nikhil or not. At last, she sighed and in a woeful tone said, "Kabir Bhai's shifting to Sydney after Dr. Aarav's wedding. He doesn't want to stay here anymore, because he can't make himself get over Anaisha, which he thinks is not right as he doesn't consider himself worthy of her. Nor does he wants to confess his love to her, which I really think he should consider doing, because I know Anaisha loves him too, she's just not sure of it. I really don't want to him to shift to Sydney without even trying to give a love a chance."

"But how do you know this? I haven't heard any news of Dr. Kabir relocating to Australia," said Nikhil, unable to digest this piece of news.

"Because he don't want anyone to know about his decision, especially Anaisha. Only Dr. Shaina and Dr. Aarav know about it, both of who had tried to persuade Bhai to change his decision but he's firm on it. GM had called me yesterday to tell me all this when Bhai had retired to his room. He even won't allow me to talk on this topic," said Rhea in the same tone as earlier.

This news was astounding for Nikhil, who had never liked Kabir much personally. But this time, Nikhil couldn't help but feel a little amount of respect for Kabir. If what Rhea said was true and matched with the observations that he had made over the last few days, then Nikhil was sure whatever Kabir was doing was completely unselfish and for Anaisha's good only, and that'd only be true if Kabir truly loved Anaisha. And joining this with Anaisha's emotionally wrenched condition, only confirmed that these two people were indeed in love with each other and should really be together. And Nikhil would make that happen now, or at least try.

"Rhea, will you help me if I tell you that I'm trying to make Kabir and Anaisha profess their love for each other? And can you get others to help us in doing that?" asked Nikhil, knowing well she would agree to it.

"Yep, I will. I'll convince Dr. Aarav, Dr. Leher, Dr. Shaina, GM and maybe even Zaina and Aarush for helping us out. That'll be fine, right?" said Rhea, in an uplifted tone.

"Great, get them all at your place this Saturday and we'll work out a way to execute our plan," said Nikhil.

"Done!"

And they departed. As decided, on Saturday (a week before the beginning of pre wedding functions of Aarav and Leher's marriage) almost all the people Rhea mentioned, reached her home on time except GM. But before anyone could start to worry, the doorbell rang and GM came walking inside, her relief on seeing so many people ready to help her in setting her grandson's love life right, evident on her face.

"What held you back, GM?" asked Rhea, helping GM with tea.

"Your brother, who else? I'm damn sure he inherited his late grandfather's trait of interrogating people over the tiniest sign of deceit. Only God knows how I escaped his interrogation and came here," said GM, shaking her head vaguely. "Anyway, what did I miss?"

"Nothing, GM, as we were waiting for you," said Zaina, sitting in between Aarush and Leher. Shaina and Aarav had occupied the two seater sofa opposite to Zaina, while Rhea's mother Vandana, sat beside GM, and her daughter Rhea was beside her. Nikhil had taken a chair to sit beside Rhea's side.

"Okay, great. So anyone has any plan?" asked GM, looking around hopefully.

"Yep, I have one, and I'm sure you all would like it," said Nikhil excitedly, concealing his heartbreak well.

"So, share it with us," said Aarav, for the first time feeling gratitude toward Nikhil.

"Okay," said Nikhil and he narrated his plan to everyone present in that room. From what he assumed, everyone seemed pleased and concurred on it. Even Zaina, Leher and Shaina gave a few ideas which Nikhil readily incorporated in his plan, alongwith GM's suggestions. Anaisha's brothers, seemed slightly at unease for a few ideas and on their wish, those ideas were scraped out.

The discussion went on for two hours and finally everything was planned to perfection. Now all they had to do was execute their plan without any chance of error. And also, hide it all from everyone, because they didn't want their plan to become vain before its execution, which explained Aarav's wish to not include Advay, Aashi and his two cousin brothers and Rhea's request to not involve Neha, Yuvraj or Shivam in it as all these people had high possibility of accidently revealing what they were planning to do during Aarav's wedding to Kabir and Anaisha. Rohan was also excluded from this as he couldn't keep anything to himself.

While leaving, GM blessed Rhea and said, "I'm so grateful to have you as my granddaughter. I so wish your brother was as sorted as you. Then maybe things could've been different."

To this, Rhea's mother replied, "Don't worry, Maaji, everything will be fine soon."

"Yeah, GM, it'll be all fine and Bhai will finally accept his love for Annie," said Rhea smilingly.

"I agree," added Shaina.

They all bade bye to each other and left Kashyap residence with a relieved smile, knowing well their beloved Kabir and Anaisha's grim state would soon turn into gleeful one.

It was ten in night and Nikhil was packing his clothes. All of Anaisha's batch mates had been invited to Aarav and Leher's wedding, which would taking place in Manali. Aarav's friends were all had to attend the wedding from the very first function and everyone was excited.

After few minutes, Nikhil was done packing his clothes. Exhausted, he lied on his bed and closed his eyes. Though, he was trying to unite Kabir and Anaisha, the fact that he was nursing a broken heart couldn't be ignored. Especially when what he was upto would only aggravate his pain. But he had chosen to help Kabir and Anaisha in realising their true feelings for each other and he'd do it at any cost, even if he become more heartbroken after this.

"'Mission: Confession of Love' begins tomorrow. We'll see Dr. Kabir, how long you'd be able to stay without breaking your silence. And how long will k Dr. Anaisha Gujral stay in oblivion about her own feelings."

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