Assalam alaikum

My spicy NachoS....

*Stands in the middle of a big hall holding a Mic*

*smiles sheepishly like Shaun the sheep*

Hello

*waves at the crowd*

im Zii.. hope u all rmbr me? U all love me na so dont fire my pants plz.. hehe.. 

*wipes the single rolling sweat from forehead* 

*Crowd eyes up & down* 

*suddenly a huge tomato strikes from nowhere direct on my eye* 

maha_1896 laughs evilly..

another egg lands on my shoulder.. 

  Jinn_hijabi shouts "goal"

a big red tomato strikes my nose..

thats farheen17 i guess.. 

* Crowned_princeZz  slowly gets up & march towards me..  next is a big watermelon, on my head* 

*black*

*Unedited*

*swearings ahead*

"Sssh"  i winced when i felt something cold on my palm..

"Thank Allah for this... Only your fore fingers got minor burns.. Who told u to hold the pan?  What if ..." Mr.professor started lecturing..

I glanced at the wall clock
"Its 7:30, i must hurry up or else ill b late"

"Sit down .. You are not going anywhere" he held my shoulders and made me sit, Or say pushed me to sit down..

"Please Mr. Khan, i can't take a leave in my very first week of the job.. Not at all understandable"

"U r not well" he stated firmly.

"Sheesh.. Only two fingers barely burned, not a big deal"

"I said u r not going today and this time i'm not joking"
Why is he so bossy..

"C'mon Mr.Khan, its barely visible, I've seen worst and FYI i don't cry and sit at home for every small injury and every small thing.. To live life ahead one needs to be strong"

"What did Sarah aunty ate?"
He crossed his arms on his chest.

"What?",i was totally confused. where did mama came in between?

"What did she ate when she was pregnant with u? Let me guess..
Stubborn cake? Or brave ice cream?"

"No she ate Brave Biryani, Sarcasm Salsa, Stubborn Samosa, moron muffin, Happy Hamburger and much more"

"Don't the list include beautiful burger or cute cupcake or love lasagne?"

"Doubt that" i smirked.

Holding my hand, he smiled.
"Fine get ready, ill drop u on my way"

........

"U work with Gabriel group of industries?"

"U know them"

"Not personally but this company gives a tough competition to ours"

"Ooh.. Then we're rivals!"

"yup" 

"hide then.. if mr.gabby saw u and me together he'll think i'm supporting your company and decieving theirs" 

"you think too much.. Go now, u r already late.. & I'll pick u up at 6 sharp"

I nodded a yes and ran towards the gate...

"Allah Hafiz"

~~~~~~

"Sorry sorry i'm late"
I entered the cabin.. My boss's cabin... Pushing the door ajar and breathing heavily, i entered; my hands on my knees and my bag long gone on the floor..

"Amna khan u r late by 8 min"

I bite my tongue coz i wanted to say- 'shit Sherlock' but refrained from doing so..

"i think i should change the office timings for your convenience" he winked and my two co-workers giggled.

"Still I'll be late by 10 min!"

He nodded his  head and smiled, "now lets start with the presentation.."

~~~~~~

"Seriously I've seen u somewhere" the pregnant lady stared at me too much for my liking..

"You must be mistaken, I've arrived this country only 15 days back so ho..." She didn't let me speak further but came out of the car and hugged me like she's my long lost sister..

"u r Amna right?... Oh my god.. U r so beautiful... Masha Allah Masha Allah... U know i told aziz, take me to Ibrahim's wedding but that stupid piece of husband didn't gave me an ear.. I was so bored at mums house, and your stupid piece of husband didn't even invite me.. Like hell i want an invitation but at least i needed the address! He said bean bags aren't allowed to travel.. Like hello I'm not........."

Gosh.. This lady speaks so much without taking a breath.. While she was blabbering i took in her appearance. Not-so-tall, not-so-short, medium heighted lady with tan skin, pitch black orbs, And plus she knows me? she said shes aziz wife maybe shes mrs aziz? i guess so..  

"im hungry" she stated and literally dragged me in a car and ordered the driver to drive to a nearby hotel.. "so you know what happened once, i and aziz were married for 6 months only and your stupid bitchy hubby trashed...."   i swear my ears will start bleeding in a short span of time..as i have this vivid imagination i thought why not use it now instead of listening her continous non stop blabbering..  i already imagined a huge factory located in her big earthen pot like stomach which works continously passing thoughts to her tongue which roll out words.. what if a big apple comes out rolling? or a big ball? or a baby itself comes out rolling!! hahahahahah.. i think the movie i saw yesterday still have its effect on my mind.. VAMPIRE SUCKS.. nice movie :) well thats not the point here im basically getting kidnapped by a bean bag lady.. oh i mean  a prego that too coz shes hungry! 

"hello.. i know the car is too relaxing and on top of that you are already tired but still you need to come out as im too much hungry and i cant wait to eat the delicious macaroni these people make.... " oh basically she means i should come out of the car.. 

1/2 HOUR LATER 

"... really, if i wasnt married to the douche ,id surely marry the chef of this resto.. man he makes so good food and plus hes too handsome" she winked. oh allah this lady is american express.. non stop fast communication system.. but hey i loved the macaroni. 

".. u are very lucky amna you are married to ibrahim.. hes the best cook ive ever met.. if i will have a boy i wont name him ibrahim coz how ever good cook he is he is still a moron and yeah ill make my son a chef.. u know why?" i didnt even answered a No but she replied anyway.. "Wwhat is necessary in LyF? the three basic needs? " again before i could answer she put up.. "Food. clothes & shelter.. i learned that in first grade.. so u see if my son is will learn cooking like awesome cooking unwantedly he'll be damn famous .. apart from being devilishly handsome he'll be talented and with talent comes money ,with money comes shelter and clothes! problem solved.. so u see.."

i wanna shout out loud to make her stop.. in this whole bantering blabbering or whatever i only understood one thing clearly.. Mr.HubbyDubby can cook! now thats nice.. 

allah makes pair by an amazing method .. like see i dont know how to make tea and my hubby is a great cook! aur kya chahiye zindagi se.. 

"OUCH"all of sudden lady engine stopped and clutched her bean bag.. i mean pot.. aah belly. 

"are you alright? hey you.." what was her name?? 

"ouch.. aah.. ya allah.." 

hey.. are you alright miss" i offered her a glass of water. " i think ill go-go in La-labour" 

"you gotta be kidding me.. now? here?" i was flabbergasted? no.. i was shocked like .. uh i don't know .. 

i looked around , its a hell lot busy area, there is barely 2 meter distance between each table and i have to remove this 100 kg woman out in less than 2 min . instead of panicking around i stood up on the table and  started banging the plate with a spoon to get attention. 

"ladies & gentlemen (if there are any here) I've a pregnant lady here who can deliver any minute .. can i get some help?" 

"we're not doctors take her to hospital idiot" a not so gentleman spoke up.

"oh hello Mr.whoever you are.. i just want you all to co operate and sideline your tables so i can get her out easily"  

instantly people started scrambling the tables and a waiter brought a wheelchair, don't know from where but i was thankful.. in a mere second i helped ms.prego to sit in it and dashed out to the exit but not before waving a thankful bye to the crowd. 

i looked around but didn't found the driver nor the car. I started asking for lift but no one was helping. stupid idiot people of copanha.. whatever it is.. And did i mention that this bean bag here is shouting her pharynx out? 

"aaahhhh.. bullshit stop the car.. you moron stop it or else..aaahh.. ill kill you all" why will the cars stop now now.. 

 suddenly a small British Leyland Mini stoped right next to us..  for a second i went all Awww.. this car is love

in short Mr.Bean car! an old couple was seated inside, the old woman smiled and offered her help.  i sat at the passenger seat and she went to sit beside the preggo. 

" to any nearby hospital please" i told the uncle an dthe engine started....... 

10 MINUTES LATER

you all know the moment when pandora jar is just full and can burst anytime? same situation is with me now.. a super super slow oldie driving an amazing leyland mini in super super slow motion , a smiling old woman sitting behin with a shitty mouth pregnant lady who knows every shit word from the whole world and this amazing car has a radio which is playing some danish song.. a very boring song.. 

GreAt.. just grEat.. 

"its paining a lot.. that shit honey sucker husband.. ill kill him.. i wont let him touch me anymore.. im in pain coz of him.. ill cut his balls i swear.. aaaaahhhh" 

"  I dag er det alicia's fødselsdag Hurra, hurra, hurra! hun sikkert sig en gave får

som hun har ønsket sig i år med dejlig chokolade og kager til" i donno which idiotic song this is but its hella irritating me now.. 

" will you stop?" 

"ahaan??"

oh no.. this uncle dont understand english ! wow!! i tried saying him stop by some weird gestures.. and shukr allah he stopped.. I left the car an dwent to the driver side and pushed the uncle in the passenger seat and now.. im the owner.. huh... 

holding the steering wheel and buckling the seat belt i pushed the gear...  

IN THE HOSPITAL (2 hours later) 

"adeel'

 "no hanan"

"adeel"

"hanan"

"whoa whoa.. wait u two.. u r fighting over the baby's name? aaah.. lets split up.. we'll give him both of ur names fine?"

"adeel hanan?"

"no duh.. Ad-Nan.. ADNAN!"

Fine... ahahahahhahahah....

(Those who wanna know what happened between the ride, please imagine that.. coz i dont wanna kill u all by bursting ur stomachs out!

*still whoever wanna know, imagine an old horrified man clutching his seat with eyes bawling out coz Amna is driving like she's a part of Fast & furious crew, a huge bean bagged preggo shouting her lungs out with all the shitty words in the world, and a terrified old lady who's so shocked and terrified who cannot even pray her last words however she wants coz she baowled by Amna's driving & Afsha's colourful words* 

hey..

wassup honey bunny's.. 

i'm sooo sorry abt the no-update thing.. 

but from now on i'll update regularly.. 

thanks for coping with me and Amna ;)

now now.. how's the chapter? 

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Zii..