reading through all the messages on my message board asking me why I haven't updated like

39

You're Calum

My heart is literally drumming inside my chest and even though I'm trying to appear like I'm not mentally freaking the fuck out, I can't stop myself when I scramble over the middle console over to the passenger's side; practically throwing myself out of the car.

My fingers absentmindedly shut the door, and then I turn so that I'm staring at him over the hood of my car. His hair has grown since I last saw him at the hospital and small wisps of wavy, chestnut brown hair hang around his forehead.

I let my eyes gaze down his body -- well, as much as I can from behind the car -- and I look for anything that might be a danger to me. There's a pair of black sunglasses hanging from the collar of his black long sleeved shirt, and he's holding a bottle of blue Gatorade, but other than that -- nothing.

Still, I take another step back; cautious.

For some reason, he finds my uncertainty hilarious, and with a wide grin he holds both his hands up in surrender; casually stating, "Trust me, it's not as creepy as you think."

Not as creepy as I think? Him knowing my name in the hospital was not as creepy as I had thought. He was, after all, a nurse. But him now showing up where I lived? Creepy was an understatement!

I let the words slowly sink into my mind, trying to somehow make sense of it all, but after repeating it for the third time silently to myself, I realize that I am infuriated. And I'm guessing he notices, because his smile slightly falters and he says, "Shit, you're mad, aren't you? OK, calm down and liste--"

My eyebrows furrow together and with a scowl on my face, I cross my arms and practically shout, "Calm down? Don't tell me to calm down! I don't even know you! What the hell are you doing here? How do you know where I live?"

"Just list--"

"No, answer me!"

A hand goes to his hair, ruffling it, and even though it's a statement meant only for his ears, I hear him anyway when he mumbles underneath his breath, "Definitely didn't think he was being serious when he said you were annoying. I guess I can see it now."

And that's when I realize ... he's fucking crazy. Like literally, 'I talk to myself', batshit crazy. I take another step back, nervously repeating, "How do you know where I live?"

His eyes squint and he tilts his head to the side, before saying, "Well actually, it's not so much as I know where you live, but really more of an, I know where Luke lives."

What?

Confused, I narrow my eyes, "That doesn't make any se--," and then I realize what he's just said. I know where Luke lives. Which can only mean one thing: he's even crazier than I had anticipated, "Okay, I'm calling the cops."

"Wait, no. Listen," he moves around the car and this time when I take another step back, it's so that I'm practically racing towards the front door; calling out for my mom.

I stumble going up the stairs and for a minute, the thought of me looking like one of those clumsy bimbos from scary movies makes me flush with embarrassment, and  I throw a glance over my shoulder at the boy hurrying to catch up behind me. He looks frustrated, annoyed even, and he's holding a phone to his ear now.

Shit, what if he's like calling for back up or something? Am I really about to get kidnapped in front of my own house by another fucking kid! Fingers shakily push open the front door and when I shove it open, I end up stumbling into someone.

Hands shoot out, gripping my shoulders and I let out an involuntary scream; closing my eyes in relief when I realize that it's actually Luke, "Easy there gorgeous."

I stumble back out of his hold, "Sorry."

His pink lips form a smirk, and he lowers his head a bit, "It's alright, I tend to get that reaction out of most of the girls I meet." I don't have time for his sarcasm, my thoughts still on the guy outside, and I glance over my shoulder preparing to tell him. Only, blue eyes move past me and I watch confused, as they roll skywards in amusement. He dryly states, "I thought I said that I'd meet you, not the other way around."

I tilt my head to the side, "What?"

It's when the voice over my head starts to talk, that I realize that it's actually stranger danger who he's addressing. "And, I thought I told you not to bother. Look, dude, I hate to break it to you, but your girl?" He stops to circle his pointer finger around his ear; declaring, "She's demented."

I freeze. What the fuck is going on? Luke's mouth twitches into a grin, he tells the boy behind me to shut up and come inside, and it's only when those brown eyes meet mine again, that I snap out of my daze, sputtering, "Don't let him in here, he's a stalker!"

"What?" 

I point my finger at the tall guy standing next to him. "We have to call the cops!"

"What are you t--," He pauses, rolls his eyes again and turns to face the boy, "Why didn't you tell her who you were? She would've known."

Dark, thick eyebrows shoot up, "Before or after she was threatening to call the cops on me?"

"Before," Luke says; dragging the word out. He shakes his head and then looks down at me. A hand reaches out to lightly clutch my shoulder, "Relax, Annie. I know him, he's not gonna hurt you."

"Physically," His friend adds, "I won't hurt you physically."

Luke rolls his eyes, "Or at all for that matter, so shut up."

"I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you I throw up," Impressed with his comeback, I watch as the tall,  olive-skinned boy rocks coolly back on his heels. His hand sinks into his dark hair and he combs it to the side, "Yes, I got that off of Google."

Luke laughs, shaking his head, "Mm, of course, you did."

When they finally quiet down, they both look back at me and I frown, "Can someone please tell me what's going on?" My head is spinning right now, I literally don't even know where to start. If this guy was Luke's so-called 'friend', why haven't I ever saw him before? Matter of fact, "If you know him, why didn't you say anything to him at the hospital? I saw you look at him!"

The two of them exchange impassive glances and then after a long minute of silence, Luke leans forward over my shoulder to close the front door, "Um what?"

I cross my arms over my chest, "In the hospital when I sprained my shoulder, he was there. Before you came we were talking and you asked me who he w--," I stop, narrowing my eyebrows, remembering the boy knowing my name and saying that someone was right. Assuming that someone is no other than Luke, I scowl over at him, "Why do you owe him ten dollars? Did you place a freaking bet on me?"

Luke blinks, "I-I, it was a lon--"

And then, "And you told him I was annoying?" I'm practically whining now, but I don't care. "I am not annoying!"

His blue eyes widen a bit, and he looks up the boy; irritated. "Calum, honestly?" He mumbles, and then he looks back down at me, "It was when you had just moved here."

But I'm not listening anymore, because I'm too distracted at the name. I know that name. That name was the reason so many good moments got interrupted, the reason why Luke was always leaving. I frowned, "You're Calum?

Trying to be funny, he whispers back, "You're Anastasia?"

And then Luke, who looks relieved that the topic has shifted, tilts his head to the side and points to himself, "I'm Luke?"

---

Furrowing my eyebrows, I stare down at the picture on Calum's iPhone. It's of him and a younger Luke and even though it's quite funny to see him so small and lanky, his blonde hair styled into a fringe and Calum's adorable boyish grin, I don't laugh. 

In fact, I'm impossibly even more confused. We're back outside, hanging out in the shade on the porch and in front of me, from where they're leaning against the porch banister, they patiently wait for me to say something.

"Nice hair, Luke," I start, looking down at the phone and then back up at the two of them again. Blue eyes roll and he reaches forward grabbing the phone and handing it to Calum who pockets it. I smile now, just slightly, and then, "So, from what you've told me, you two have been friends since you were fourteen, Calum never comes over because he's the one with the better video game collection, and you chose not to introduce me to him in the hospital because he'd already had weirded me out and it was pointless then?"

Brown eyes slide over to Luke and the two of them stare at each other, waiting for the other to answer first; Calum caves, clearing his throat, "Yeah, I think so. More or less."

It doesn't really make sense but I don't press the issue further because well, I've already made quite an idiot out of myself for the day. Luke looks over expectantly at me, "Anything else?"

"Well, yea." I raise an eyebrow, "If we're all the same age, why are you a nurse?"

"Oh my God, Annie. You can't just ask people why they're a nurse." Luke says. We both look over at him, and I scrunch my nose up; feigning annoyance. He holds his palms up, "Mean Girls reference, sorry. Ignore that, continue."

"My mom is actually a doctor there, I just help her out sometimes," Calum admits. 

"So, you're a candy-striper?"

"I mean, if you can get past the fact that I'm not a girl and I don't have to wear those ugly ass uniforms -- then yeah," his shoulders lift in a shrug. "I'd say volunteer, but I guess you can say that."

"Oh," I mumble, and I recognize that now that I know he isn't a stalker but in fact one of Luke's best, if not only friend, it's sort of easier to talk to him. Not much, considering I don't really know him, but it's enough. He has this whole laid-back vibe, very chill and confident like, and from my seat on the swing, I watch as he drums his finger against his jean-clad thigh while he and Luke go back to talking to each other. He's explaining something to him, his large hands moving to elaborate and I almost lean forward to listen, but then someone calling my name from across the lawn grabs my attention. 

I turn away from them for a quick second, jumping up to glance down over the banister to see Ashton and Chelsea walking across our lawn. Behind them is a very annoyed looking Michael, and I watch as they all near the porch. 

"Hey," Ashton says, smiling at me. Hazel eyes turn to Luke, tipping his chin in acknowledgment and then he turns back to me, "There was nothing to do at my apartment, so it was between Michael and yours. You have a pool so, the majority ruled. Hope you don't mind."

"It's not like she had a choice," Luke says, sarcastically. He turns to Calum and says something under his breath and I watch as Calum attempts to nonchalantly lean forward, before his brown eyes scale Ashton's tall frame. He shrugs, and I'm wondering what Luke asked him when Ashton clears his throat. 

"She could tell us to leave," He says slowly, and then his eyes slide to mine, "Do you want us to go? We just wanted to hang out, really."

"Oh no, it's cool with me. I wasn't doing anything anyway. Eh, where's Tay--,"

"Don't say her name," Ashton rushes out, cutting me off. Then he glances over at Michael, who's all brooding and sullen for some strange reason and I almost laugh. He looks exactly how he did when I first met him. 

"Why?" I ask, hesitantly.

He leans in, whispering, "They broke up ... again. For like the fifth time since they first started dating."

"Seriously, what happened?"

Shoulders shrug and he peeks over his shoulder only to see a pair of heated emerald eyes staring straight at him. Michael looks even more irritated now and he dryly states, "I can fucking hear everything you're saying, Irwin."

"Sorry," Ashton flushes. He looks back at me, widens his eyes briefly, and then ascends the steps to take a seat on the porch swing. 

"Who is this?" Chelsea wonders from the last step. Her blue eyes are trained on Calum and I roll my eyes. And I guess she realizes because she adds, "I was just wondering."

I purse my lips. Yeah, sure. "He's Luke's friend."

"Does Luke's friend have a name?"

"I don't know, ask him," I mutter back, sarcastically. 

And she does, which he then responds, "Yes, I have a name." This makes me slightly smile and I make eye contact with her, whispering, "Not everyone wants to be subjected to your twelve-year-old boobies."

"At least I have some. You, on the other hand, could use a handful." She smiles for a quick second before dropping it and sighing, "It's bad enough that I'm always being dragged here against my will, but I sure as hell am not about to spend today standing aroun--"

I cut her off, "Why are you here, anyway? Not to be rude or anything but Taylor isn't here." I pause, realizing my slip up, and then shoot a glance at Michael. He rolls his eyes at me and I smile apologetically, before turning back to Chelsea, "Eh, isn't she your babysitter?"

The smaller girl sighs, "She's not my babysitter. She's just my cousin ... who watches me from time to time."

I laugh, "Okay, so, your babysitter?"

Choosing to ignore my question, Chelsea tucks a curl behind her ear and admits, "If you must know, she's paying me twenty dollars to keep an eye on Michael so, I pretended like I wanted to hang out with Ashton."

Both Michael and Ashton start talking at the same time, 

"She's paying you to watch me? Are you serious?"

"You're pretending like you want to hang out with me?"

I laugh as the two of them start bickering with Chelsea, her eyes on her nails as she responds to them, and then I turn to face Luke. He's still talking to Calum, and I subtly shift over so that my arm is resting against his. It's not that I need him or anything, I just like being near him. He lets his hand drop, fingers gently brushing the back of my hand and for a minute I just want to forget that anyone's here and just intertwine them all together. 

Luke looks over at me, a small smile on his face, and he raises his eyebrows. When I turn back around Chelsea is staring straight at me, and I clear my throat before attempting to casually raise my hand to tuck hair behind my ears. 

"So," I start, "Pool?"

---

I don't exactly want to go swimming with my current situation, so while I'm reminding myself of how dumb I was for even suggesting the idea, I sit on the couch in front of the fire pit with my knees drawn to my chest; watching. 

Well, everyone meaning only Chelsea and Ashton. Both Michael and Calum are sitting on the couch next to me, their eyes on their phones. Apparently Michael can't go swimming today either because he wants to dye his hair tonight and he doesn't want to mess it up, and Calum will only go in if Luke does. 

Luke is in the house getting towels, which should only take a few minutes and then after that, it's just gonna be me and Michael. Which I mean can't be that bad considering the fact that he's not even talking. Just huffing quietly to himself, his lip between his teeth, as he types maddeningly against his phone screen.

I can only assume that it's Taylor he's texting and I tuck my face into my knee, laughing. I've never been through a break up before, let alone a relationship, but watching him is quite funny. It's a second where he reads her text, his face impassive, and then his face shrivels up in complete annoyance before he pauses to think of something to say, quickly responding. Then he repeats the whole thing all over again; an everlasting cycle of amusement in my opinion. 

My eyes turn to Calum, only to see him looking at me, and he does that thing where he hurriedly turns his head when our eyes meet. I flush, embarrassed, and then say, "What?"

"What, what?" He casually responds. 

"You were just staring at me."

Eyebrows tip together in mock confusion, "No I was--"

But he's cut off because Michael is suddenly plopping down between us and thrusting his phone towards me. "You're a girl, right?" He questions, green eyes intent and serious. He doesn't wait for me to respond, motioning for me to look down at his phone screen, "What should I respond to this?"

I hesitate at first but when Calum leans over to peer over at the screen for himself, I follow. It's from Taylor, obviously, and it's a huge ass paragraph about Michael not really deserving her. Ugh, girls can be so dramatic. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. 

I shrug, "You can always plead otherwise."

"Or," Calum suggests, "You can say that she's right, that you don't."

Glancing over at him, I say, "No, that doesn't make sense."

"It does. Because then she'll think that it's just like a self-esteem thing and you know, she'll probably want you even more."

Michael looks over at him, eyebrows narrowed in consideration, and before he can even think about saying anything in agreement, I shake my head furiously. "No! Then she'll only want him back out of pity."

"Not if he says it in a way where it's like, you're right I don't. You're way out of my league," he insists, and then he pauses for a second to to look at us. "Is she hot?"

Michael scoffs, "Yes she's hot!" Calum laughs and then they bow their heads towards each other as Michael shows him pictures of the tall, blonde haired girl in his phone. 

I don't lean in, but from where I am I can tell that he has a whole bunch of them because he just keeps on swiping to the right. After a few minutes they sit back up, and after Calum agrees that Taylor is in fact, hot, he turns to Michael and asks, "What color are you dying your hair?"

Shoulder lift in a shrug as Michael sets out to finish a text to Taylor, "Not sure yet. Green?"

"Green?" Calum repeats, slowly.  "Like what  you get when you mix blue and yellow?"

Eyes glance up in amusement towards him and Michael narrows his eyebrows, "Um, yeah?"

I half expect Calum to be as surprised as I am. Only, his brown eyes gleam in excitement and he smiles, "Seriously?"

Then Michael nods, and their heads are leaning in close together once more as he shows him pictures of all his previous hair colors.

"I'm going to go see where Luke is," I mutter to no one in particular and then I stand up from my seat; throwing a quick glance back at the two of them. 

Once I'm inside, I call out for Luke, who ends up being in the bathroom. When I get upstairs, the door is already open and I hurry over to lean against the door frame.

"I think Michael and Calum like each other. Like, friends, like each other! Isn't that weird? Michael isn't even really my friend and now him and Calum are suddenly besties!" I rush out, stepping forward to lean back against the sink next to him. 

In the mirror, where he's fixing his hair, Luke lazily turns his head to look over at me, "Great, now our friends will be mutuals."

"I know," I say, scrunching my nose up. "It's sort of weird."

He nods and then he leans forward to comb his hands through his hair again, "Do you think I need a haircut? I feel like it's getting too long."

"Says the boy who had a fringe in the ninth grade," I tease. 

Blue eyes roll, and he turns to look at me, "I will regret showing you that picture for as long as I live." Then he's reaching his hand over his shoulder and in one swift movement, he's tugging his shirt off.

With a small laugh, I manage not to look down distractedly at his chest and I tilt my head to side, "Well, I thought it was really cute."

Luke lightly flushes, quickly turning around to toss his shirt over the shower bar, "Let's not talk about it." Gosh, why does he have to be so adorable? Biting gently down on my bottom lip, I push up off the counter and walk over to him; wrapping my arms around his waist from behind him. 

"Hey, I'm only teasing." His skin is warm and smooth underneath me and before I can think about it, I lean forward and press my lips against his back, "But, yeah. You definitely could use a haircut."

Luke lets out a quiet laugh and then he turns around in my hold; staring down at me. His eyes flicker down to my lips. I can't decide if the whole thing is sexy or just plain adorable, or hell -- maybe both, but I do smile at him, saying, "If you think you're going to kiss me, think again."

Surprise crosses his face for just a second and then his tongue slides over his bottom lip before he amusingly says, "Why?"

"You called me annoying!" I grumble, pretending to be upset. 

His hand gently cups underneath my jaw and he leans down anyway, "I did. Multiple times. But it was one of those things where I only said it to hide how I much I fucking liked you." Then his mouth is on mine, my lips automatically parting against his. 

His tongue slips past my lips, his other hand reaches up to weave his fingers into my hair and then he's walking me backwards until I'm pressed against the sink counter. When I'm all out of breath, I gently pull away from him; my hands moving to rest lightly on his hips. 

"We should probably go back outside now," he whispers against my neck. His smooth lips press a single kiss to my collarbone, teeth grazing the skin there, and then Luke takes a step back; my hands drop back to my sides. "If you stay in here any longer, I might not ever let you leave."  

When he says this, my stomach does that low dip again, and I smile shyly. "That's totally fine with me." As I expected, he laughs. Which only makes me laugh because seriously, the sight of him all dimples and smiley is infectious. Luke reaches out and playfully ruffles his hands on either side of my head, messing up my hair and I pretend to be upset; shoving him back, "Hey! Stop!"

With all of my hair over my face it's impossible for me to roll my eyes, so I reach out and nudge him gently against his the smooth skin of his stomach, while he tucks my curls behind my ears. He bites his lip to stop himself from laughing, "Man, you're cute."

"So, I've heard."

"Oh really? From who?"

Shrugging playfully, I lie and say, "Lots of people. Can you imagine all the guys that wanted me at my old high school?"

Blues eyes roll, "I can," His fingers grip the front of my t-shirt and he yanks me over to him. 

"But you know, that would just be a waste of time since I'm the one who gets to kiss you." Luke whispers in my ear, and then with those soft lips of his he begins to trail feather light kisses around my ear and down my neck.

"And, the one who gets to touch you." His hand moves down, skimming my waist, over my hip, and down to the back of my thigh. I can't help it when my breath hitches. Luke laughs quietly in my ear, "I wonder who else can make you do that." His hand travels up my thigh to my behind, and then flat against the small of my back where he presses me closer to him.

Ignoring the knot in my stomach, I go for cool and calm and say, "You're so sure of yourself."

"No, I just know what's mine."

I raise an eyebrow, "Is that so?"

"Mm, don't play with me Annie." Then he cups his hands under my jaw, angling my head up towards him and kisses me hard; pushing his tongue into my mouth. 

My eyes close, my mind buzzing and just like I'm lost in his kiss.

He cradles my head, his tongue exploring my mouth, and I let my finger weave themselves into his blonde hair. Is he really mine? The thought makes me grin against Luke's mouth and unfortunately he pulls away, his hands on either side of my face, staring intently into my eyes.

His eyes are that light, steely blue color that makes my entire body tingle with want and it's then when I realize then that he's right. We should most definitely go back downstairs right now, because I swear I'm like a second away from jumping him.

I flush at the thought and then with a small smile I let my hands slide down from around his shoulders to rest lightly on his bare chest, "Come on let's go."

Luke smiles and then tongue swipes over his bottom lip, "Wait, I think I'm forgetting something."

Laughing quietly I tilt my head up and kiss him again, "No you're not. You're just saying that so we can stay inside."

"No, I swear I am," he insists, his blue eyes wide, "But I can't remember." And just when I'm rolling my eyes, preparing to lean up to kiss him again someone blurts outs, "Towels."

My brown eyes dart in the direction of the voice that I know can't possibly belong to the tall boy standing against me and I swear I almost die at the sight of Chelsea, wet from the pool and leaning against the door frame; smirking. 

Her head tilts to the side in mischievous amusement and she slowly says, "You're forgetting the towels."

--

AN 

thanks for reading and please vote and comment if you haven't already. don't be a silent reader. 

also, if anyone want to sPare some conversation, talk to me please on instagram or something. i really have no friends ... 

With that being said, will update soon, thanks again. ILY and enjoy not only the following recommended books but also these beautiful gifs of this beautiful boy

shoutouts:

jet black heart // c.h. - "You should forget about me. I'm damaged with a head full of demons." KaleidoscopeSoul

daddy's cute little attitude - Ellie's hometown was different from other people's. Some people might sell clothes or furniture or jewelry. But her town sold people. Sex Slaves to be exact. The only thing that can keep her safe is Niall Horan. HoransLittleHoe

justin bieber's baby mama - after your long term boyfriend cheats on you while pregnant and you find out he isn't the father do you let it break you or make you stronger? thefaultinmyface

my brothers best friend // luke hemmings - What happens when Annabella Irwin falls for one of her brother's best friends? hopefuchs

bring me back (l.r.h) -  "You push everyone away, but I hoped you wouldn't do it to me too.""Give me one good reason why I shouldn't."With that he took a single step towards me, and crashed his lips onto mine. "Because before you, I believed love was just a fantasy." chaslayer

liam payne's step sister - Being Liam Payne's step sister, Ellie Payne, is amazing. But when my abusive dad steps back into the picture just after everything is going perfectly. Harry will do anything to get me to love him instead of Niall. Can this get any worse? SincerelyEllie02

behind the fake smile (justin bieber and ariana grande) - Ariana Grande-Butera a 17 year old girl, has a dark life with many deep secrets ... She just puts on a fake smile hoping that someday life would eventually get better. Things change when the school's biggest player Justin Bieber finds out the harsh realities of her life. 

bad boy is my stepbrother - When Liam's mother gets engaged to Sophia's dad, he realises that it's gonna be impossible for him to keep his hands off of her. Will these lost souls fight for their parents marriage, or will they break all the rules and fall for each other? blanket_monster

& let me just sneak in some self promotion - skylines - "there's beauty in everything, jo. even skylines"in which an introverted girl begins to discover a side of herself she never knew existed with the help of a mysterious and magnetic boy. aestheticannie (me lol)

... these books just keep getting more and more diverse. please check at least one of them out, happy reading!