I wake up. Go to the bathroom to take a shower, brush my teeth then go get dressed I put on yesterday jeans and a black tank top. Take a look at my reflection then head downstairs my dad made breakfast well.. he didn't cook it he just warmed up the milk for the different cereals on the counter. I sit on one of the chairs at the counter.

"Hey sweetie." He says with his mouth full. Do all men find some kind of enjoyment talking with their mouth full?

"Umh...yea... what's for breakfast?" Although I already knew.

"Cereal." They are five different cereal boxes in front of me and a bowl. I pour my breakfast in the bowl then add milk and one teaspoon of sugar.

"So what are we going to do today?" I ask.

"I was thinking that we should go and pay Kylie a little visit then go get launch there is this old place I love going to they make the best food it's not actually far from the house just a few blocks down" Kylie Kidman my stepsister, she was an ongoing child and extremely talkative, had an energetic smile that was contagious all the time, she loved going to the park and school and she also loved swimming that's until she drowned and dead at the age of eight. I hate water.

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"I mean that sounds pretty good."

"Nice! Now finish up." I nod. After eating up our cereal we hit the road. We stop by a florist to buy fresh flowers.

The cemetery is quiet too quiet it feels like they are people watching us even though we can't see them. I take a deep breath before going in and conquer my fear. For Kylie I remind myself.

"This is it." We stand before her burial chamber its written Kylie Sky Kidman  I cry at my loss. She was a great child. I lay down the flowers we bought specially for her. My dad and I say a few words and tell her about me moving in and how much we miss her. We mix emotions we cry and sob at the same time it's overwhelming. We say our goodbye to Kylie and promise to visit her again.

When we get in the car I buckle up and I cover my eyes with the back of my hand.

"Do you want to do something fun?" I don't feel like going out.

"Yes.. no.. I don't know."

"Hey sweetie I know it hard to see.. uhm Kylie. I just want you to know that yes I miss her we all do so I completely understand what you are going through."

"Is that the reason why you went all out decorating my bedroom?" He turns sideways and faces the front.

"Yes." He sigh.

"So you felt as if all your daughters have left you?"

"Yes." He frowns. "Don't feel bad about it."

"Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

"I don't know. I didn't think it was that important for you to know."

"You are my father of course it's important, you going through this and you didn't bother to tell me your one and only daughter." I can't stop the tears crawling out.

"Come here" he gives me a tight hug in attempt to soothe me. "Shh... shh... don't cry." I nod and wipe away my tears.

"I know something that will cheer you up."

"Please don't say a jazz concert." I give him my best lazy smile.

"No!! No that's not it." He chuckles. "I was talking about this beautiful restuarant I like going to on Saturdays Lola not all of them because my work schedule is tight but a few sacrifices won't harm anyone." I laugh.

"I know how much you love classics."

"No I don't!" He frowns her mouth.

"Yes you do" I argue.

"Okay so what if I'm into Jazz. I honestly can not stand the type of music you young people listen to. I'm a grown man" he touches his chin like there's a beard there.

"You not that old." He is not that old.

"I'm forty five."I shrug. "Oh and we meeting Rozelda" his eyes sparkle from saying that name.

"Can't wait to see her. Start the car dad." He nods. Rozelda 'Rosy' Kidman she is married to my father and gave him Kylie. They got married the same year as my mom and Matthew which was ten years ago. Their weddings were eight months apart. She brings out joy into my dad's life and she is very loving and is certainly not that strict as my mom is. She likes giving kisses and hugs, she has such a warm personality. She works at a fancy restaurant and she is the head chef there. How lucky is my dad!? My dad is six years older than her.

On our way I practically force my dad to try pop music we bicker on why it's good and why it's not good to listen to I win the debate and play my playlist. He hums and dances all the way there making me laugh. He voice is not meant for singing! Talk about his dance moves let me not dwell into that. By the time we get to Lola my stomach is throbbing from laughing so hard.

"My stomach is aching." I tell my dad.

"Bet you laughed all of it out." He raises his brow. "It'll be okay before the food arrives." We step in, the first thing I do is look around the restaurant it is very warm and modern. I like modern it really sticks out for me, the paints, the red and white floors are exclusively welcoming.

I follow my dad. Why is he going to the back? Now I see why.

Rozelda stands to greet me. "Hello sweetie." She kisses both my cheeks. "It has been a long time." She frowns.

"Yea it has. Yay I'm here now." I throw my hands in the air to ease the mood. I don't want her feeling bad about me being away for so long, that works perfectly well. We eat dinner listening to Rozelda talk about her passion for work and the wedding she was catering at yesterday.

"You guys should have seen the newly weds they were stunning."

"Bet they were." We laugh. My dad really can't keep his eyes off of Rosy.

I get home. I must admit my dad's Porsche is quite a thrill. I say goodnight to Rozelda and my dad then go to my bedroom. Feels weird living with them both here. Rosy is a Chef so I assume most of the time I wont be seeing her here.

I search for my diary I need to get the burn I feel deep inside of seeing Kylie off of my chest. I begin to write about the way I feel and what is happening in my life currently. No one has ever read my diary, I'd like to keep it that way it is way to personal plus I find joy in writing I don't talk much. My conceptions are heard and understood evidently on page. My diary is my life in a nutshell, I differ to believe that if the world spoke on paper we would live in a more peaceful place. I cringe at the thought that not all of us are hygienic. As I'm writing my phone vibrates from the headboard I reach across to pick it up. 

It's a text message from my mom it reads...

*Hello my sunshine, we just arrived in Portland! *

*Sounds fun.* I reply to her text.

My mom, Chloe and Matthew went to Portland regarding Mathew's job. He was told me what it was about but I wasn't paying attention I just nodded at everything he said even though I didn't hear one word.

I dose off while writing in my secret diary.

...

The next morning Rosy and I eat make pancakes for breakfast. It is a Sunday. I help Rosy clean the house, coming to my understanding people don't like to clean on Sundays they do that only on Saturdays. I guess this is what she gets for not being here all the time. I love cleaning I can't stand a mess environment plus it keeps me busy.

I haven't seen my dad all morning.

The weather changes in an instant and right now the rain has picked up I lift up the kitchen curtain to peak outside and It is pouring heavy. Good thing we finished vacuuming. I neatly put the last plate in the dishwasher, Rosy goes to the livingroom I join her there. Surprisingly I find my dad sitting next to his wife they look adorable.

"Brie?" I turn my head sideways to my dad. "I'm really glad that we are getting along." I smile at his kind words.

"Me too." I say meaning it.

The rest of the day is spent watching movies. I head to my room to watch TV. My dad and Rosy has a lot to catch up on so I give them some privacy even though they begged me multiple times to stay and finish watching THE DREAMGIRLS with them I told them that tomorrow is my first day at school I have to organize my stuff. I walk up the stairs what I told them was merely half true. I finish the movie they are watching downstairs in my room.

What time is it? I left the remote on my study table and I'm lazy to fetch it. I reach out for my phone on the dresser to check the time. The first thing that captures my eyes is the two missed and two message I received from my mom and Chloe.

* Hey Brilana, we tried calling you but unfortunately gained no luck in doing so. I miss you already baby. And have a great first day at school. We love you xoxo * I roll my eyes at the first sentence. She said it from her dear heart I finally find myself smiling.

I read Chloe's *Hey big sis, have a happy first day tomorrow and I love you* she sends an emoji of a tongue sticking out I didn't know that emojis like that existed kids of nowadays I cheerfully roll my eyes.  Wait did she say that I should have a happy first day? I laugh at the cute face who wrote me this cute message.

*Thank you. I will and I miss you more goodnight.*