THE SPAWNS

Whoring Yourself like France

Chapter XXIX—Cole

© DarknessAndLight

Jayden was actually snoring when I woke up the next morning. And Maika had switched it up and her pillow was by our feet and she was literally resting her feet in Jay's face.

            "I can't believe that hasn't woken him up yet," I told my friend groggily.

            Maika snorted. "Me neither. The asshole got drunk last night. I didn't even notice he drank enough to be."

            "He's a light weight," I reminded her.

            "You mean he's a dumbass."

            "Yeah, that too," I snorted softly. "Are you going to murder him when he wakes up?"

            "No, I'm going to be pissed but I'm not going to murder him. It's going to take a lot more than that for him to get rid of me. I already told you, I'm ready to see him go through two divorces," she told me, playing with Jay's hair with her big toe.

            "I know, you already said."

            "You see, I'm not sure you fully grasp what that means," she said and then took a big breathe, readying herself. I was worried. "It means that I'll watch him fall in love with another woman. I'll be in denial all throughout their relationship, always thinking it's not going to last. But it will. I'll have to go to their wedding and I'll be devastated. I'll look at him up by that altar while he looks at a girl which isn't me with adoration and devotion and I'll have to not puke while he does it. And I'll know aaaaall the while he's married that she's the wrong girl for him but I'll have to be supportive nevertheless. They'll have kids of course. I'll have to look at their perfect Jayden faces mixed with the wrong hoe. I'll have to love them because they're Jayden's, but it'll rip a little part of my soul each time I'll look at them. I'll witness his marriage slowly falling apart. And then I'll have to help him through his divorce. I'll have to comfort him while he cries about another girl. I'll babysit his two stupid kids. I'll love them and hate them at the same time. He'll go out with a couple of rebound girls. I'll have to watch him fuck around with girls that aren't me. It's going to kill me thinking that I'm still not even a consideration for a desperate fuck. And then when I'll think that maybe it's finally my time to shine he'll fall in love with some other bimbo. And I'll have to really suffer while I watch them date and just knoooooow that everything about it is wrong. He'll do all the same mistakes he did with his first wife because he never learns, because no one is ever going to get him the way I do. I'll see it coming, slowly but surely, the moment when he'll decide that he wants to propose again. I'll start going to a shrink because I'll be close to snapping. Unexpectedly, I'll fall in love with my therapist. It's a Freudian thing, I have daddy issues. He'll obviously fall in love with me too because I'm amazing but he won't be allowed to date me. I'll have to change therapist. It's going to destroy me even more. But I'll have to keep smiling because Jayden's going to want me to take pictures and get along with wife number two. I'll have to watch him look at another girl that isn't me walk down the aisle towards him, with that same adoration and devotion as that last one. He'll have another kid with bimbo number two. It's going to be the same adorable problem of Jayden cuteness and wrong bitch face. They'll work out for a little while because Jayden will be older and maybe a little bit wiser. Or more desperate really. He won't want a second failed marriage. I'll think that I'll never have a chance unless the bimbo gets hit by a car. I'll think about hitting the bimbo with my car. I'll drive way too often by his house with the hope of seeing her walking in the street and manslaughtering the bitch. I won't do it, but I'll think about it too much. It'll turn me into even more of a psychotic. One night when it rains I'll drive by and the bitch will be out taking the trash and my car will hydroplane and I'll almost kill the bimbo. This will drive me to an even darker place and the same evening I'll drop at my old therapist's condo in the city, water pouring down and he'll open the door and I'll throw myself at him and we'll kiss passionately under the rain and then make love in his foyer. I'll leave before I can explain myself. He'll try to contact me. I'll try to ignore him. We'll relapse a couple of times. And when I'll finally think that maybe Mr. Therapist and I can make it work Jayden will tell me that he's leaving wife number two. I wont know what to do. Mr. Therapist will be a possible future while Jayden is just an intangible hope. Seeing me potentially be in love with another man is going to screw with Jay's head. He's going to start seeing me as a potential woman now. I'll be too pissed and broken over his two marriages that I'll pick Mr. Therapist who's been offered a job in England, his native land. He's British. He's got a sexy accent. He's classy too. And rich. I'll pack everything to leave with him. And then as I'm at the airport, on my way to tea and crumpets and a stable man that loves me, Jayden will come running and announce his undying love for me and I'll crumble. I'll let him win because it's Jayden. It's always going to be Jayden. I'll jump in his arms. We'll kiss passionately. And then Mr. Therapist is going to shoot us both in the airport because therapist are the ones with the most issues," Maika ranted and then took an enormous breathe at the end.

            I just sat there on the bed, blinking slowly. I wanted to clap. I wanted to walk out and never come back. Crazy attracted crazy, obviously that was why my friends were as weird as I was. "You've put waaaaay too much into this," I finally said. "You sounded like my dad just now."

"Thank you very much," she grinned.

I narrowed my eyes a bit. "Maybe we dismissed the whole you being his love child with an Asian thing took quickly."

"Maaaaaaybe," she answered, and it worried me a bit.

"Well," I stretched my arms and got up. "I'll leave you two lovebirds together." I quickly visited the bathroom and then got dressed. "Alright, I'm heading out to hunt for food," I announced, "Don't do anything illegal to him."

"No promises," my friend answered.

"Bad Tiger," I teased.

"Naaaaaughty Tiger," she growled.

I laughed. It was a wonder Jayden still hadn't woken up. He must have been quite drunk last night. "Behave."

She winked as I closed the door behind me. Creep.

There was a continental breakfast in the lobby of the motel. I headed for it. When I got there I automatically spotted the twins sitting at one of the three tables, stuffing their faces while the clerk glared at them. I laughed at the sight, but decided not to linger. I grabbed a muffin and coffee and went for a walk. The motel also had a pool, a shady looking pool but a pool nevertheless. There were a bunch of deck chairs around it so I headed straight for one.

With my sunglasses on, eyes closes, ankles crossed and arms under my head, I soaked up as much sun as I could, doing a splendid rendition of a lazy cat. I'd been trying, as much as I could to not think about Lilibeth so far. But it had barely been a couple of days and I could still feel Beth's lips on mine. As much as I was trying to convince myself I had to get a grip and maybe possibly move on, there was no way I could forget what it felt like to have my lips pressed against hers. It was impossible for me to think that anything could rival that single perfect moment when it was just me and her and she still hadn't rejected me and I really thought, during that lone second that she finally wanted me to be hers.

It wasn't about her being mine. It was always about me being hers. I had always known I wanted her. The whole her-wanting-me-thing, that was the tricky part.

It was painful to think about all of this. But at the same time it was kind of glorious to think that in one perfect second I had been all Beth wanted. That for one magnificent second, she hadn't been able to restrain her desire for me.

Whatever would happen next, I would always have that.

Since I was thinking about Beth so much, I took my phone out of my pocket and stared at it.

I wanted to text her. I wanted to call her. But I should also be giving her her space.

Before I could even realize it, I was dialling a number.

Jay's mom answered.

"Hi Aunty," I greeted her.

"Hi Cole, how's it going?" she asked brightly.

"Pretty well, all things considered. No one's been murdered yet," I joked.

She chuckled. "Ah, I presume the infamous cousin isn't an enjoyable company"

"Not quite." I chuckled too. "I was just calling because I assumed that Jayden hadn't called yet to check in, and just to assure you that we're all alive and well."

"We're not sure when she's coming back home," she told me instead.

"Excuse me?" Was I really that gorram obvious? Did everyone know?

"Lilibeth. We're not sure yet. She just called. She's having fun with her cousin. I can text you once we know more."

I wanted to hit my forehead repeatedly with my phone. Could someone spell awkwaaaard? "No it's fine. Don't worry about it."

"It's good for you both, you know. Being apart, doing things on your own, figuring yourselves out."

I wanted tell her that's I'd spent almost an entire year apart from her. I wanted to tell her that if two people loved each other they didn't need space, they needed the exact opposite of space. I wanted to tell her that people who needed space were the kind of people that shouldn't be in a relationship. Ever.

I kind of wanted to cry a little.

Instead I thanked her, said my goodbyes and hung up, not feeling better for one bit.

I closed my eyes and tried to forget everything except the sound of Beth's laughed when I said something funny.

Someone came shuffling beside me and plopped down on the chair next to mine. I didn't even need to open my eyes and I already knew who it was.

I knew it from the sound of his footsteps. I knew it from the way the particles moved around him. 

            I didn't say a word to him. I wasn't exactly sure how things had gone down with Dakota last night. I really hoped he hadn't banged her and then come to sleep in the same bed as Maika.

            I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure he hadn't though. If he had banged anyone tipsy he would have woken everyone up to announce it last night.

            We were both silent and then Jay heavily sighed. I didn't reward that with any kind of comment so after a few minutes he added a nice, "This whole thing sucks."

Wrong door buddy. "Oh no, no. Don't come to me. I'm not Switzerland here. I'm the United States of America. I have an opinion about everyone and everything and I'll arm any mutherfacker I think is right with nukes. In this particular moment, you're god damn North Korea Sweet Peach. You ain't getting any nukes from me," I told Jayden.

"Seriously?"

How could he even ask? "I love you Jay but nobody fucks with Maika, I mean, in the bad sense and gets away with it. You picked the wrong side."

Jay threw his hand in the air with exasperation. "I didn't pick a side. I was trying to be Switzerland."

I snorted. "Please. You were whoring yourself like France, shut up."

"What do you want me to do? What am I supposed to say?" he whined in response.

"You're supposed to protect Maika at any cost. Even if she's wrong, even if she's being an idiot. That's our job. We watch each other's back." Otherwise her psychotic therapist is going to kill her and you apparently.

"What about my back huh? What about me messing up? I'm supposed to be fucking perfect? Is that it? You make out with my sister and then you throw a fucking fit and then we just up and drop everything so you can cope or whatever and that's fine, but I can't have one laps of better judgement?"

Time stopped. "What?"

"I'm not allowed to be stupid sometimes?" Jayden asked, totally oblivious to the real issue of that last sentence.

"No, you're always stupid, that's normal, I meant... what the fug Jay? You knew about Beth?" Seriously, all the Eatons know?

"Of course I knew about Beth. Who do you take me for?" he asked, making a face.

Was he serious? "For the most unobservant person on planet Earth." At no time what so ever had he given me the impression he knew. Here I was thinking I knew everything about the guy and he was clueless to my darkest secret. I'd been wrong all along.

"Please. You two were screaming your heads off. And give me some credit. Seriously. I've known you had a thing for my sister since for ever but you're way too chicken shit to do anything about it so I always figured that would never even happen and I wouldn't have to worry about it. Honestly, I always thought you would end up a Catholic priest and go live in Rome, maybe become the pope at one point. But like, I always pictured serious abstinence on your part. Your parents done fucked up."

"I think I need to sit for a second," I said, looking emptily ahead. The fact that I was already sitting down kind of showed how shook I was.

He knew. He had always known. How?

"Jesus, seriously?" Jayden said, apparently discouraged with me.

"You knew?" I asked again. That couldn't be true. Just couldn't.

"Of coooourse I knew."

"But you were always so fucking clueless around us, when we were being... I don't know gooey eyed or something."

Jayden rolled his eyes. "Please, Maika sleeps on top of me and rubs her ass on lil'Jay and it doesn't mean anything. You holding my sister's hand is certainly not going to produce any nieces or nephews any time soon."

I shook my head slowly. "I can't believe this..."

"Whatever, seriously dude, this is really not important right now. What's important is that you and Mai need to cut me some slack. Alright, so sure I messed up last night and I should have stayed with you and Maika, but... look Maika will always have me. She'll always have you. Dakota... she doesn't have anybody man."

I snorted, unaffected about that part. "And whose fault is that?"

"Mostly hers. But you don't abandon a puppy just because it hasn't been house broken right. You try to set the puppy straight," Jay explained.

I narrowed my eyes. "I hate dogs. Cats know where they have to do their business."

"Cole, you've been lucky with your cats. Lots of cats shit on people's bed. Cats are assholes too."

"We're diverting again."

"We are. The point still is that I was stupid for going after Dakota, but I wasn't doing it out of the evilness of my heart. I was trying to be a good person."

I threw my empty styrofoam cup of coffee at his face. "You were trying to have your pecker played with."

"So what if I was? Jeeeeeesus Cole. I'm not going to follow you and be your choir boy. I'm sure it would be an amazing plot for a shitty melodrama, but it's not going to happen in real life."

I sighed. I didn't want to argue any more. I felt exhausted.

Maika joined us at that point. She didn't greet us, she just walked up to me and decided to lie right on top of me.

"So, since Jayden got himself a girlfriend, I thought it was only fair that I got one too," she said and licked my cheek for emphasis.

"Let me just make sure of something here. I'm the girlfriend?" I asked her, raising my sunglasses off my eyes to get a better look at her mischievous smile.

"Would you guys stop?" Jay whined. "Dakota is not my girlfriend."

"Yet," Maika snorted.

"No, not yet, not ever," he replied.

"Suuuuuure," she snorted and settled herself more comfortably on me. She wasn't that heavy so I didn't mind. "She's just the girl you make out with occasionally."

Obviously, she was riling him up because Jay got up his seat. "Once, ONCE."

"Wait, wait, wait, Hold up here", I said, spreading my arms on both side of me, like I could stop everything that way. "You made out with Dakota?"

"Once, just once, and it didn't even last that long. It was very light, very PG kind of making out," he defended himself.

I didn't care. "Maika, dearest," I said.

She smiled at me. "Yes, Cole, honey."

"Please throw Jayden in the pool right now."

"With pleasure." And just like that, before Jayden had the time to react, she was on her feet and pushed him into the pool

"JESUUUUS, MAIKA! That water is disgusting! I got some in my mouth," our friend whined when his head emerged from the water.

He walked right into that one. I think the three of us realized it before Maika even answered. "Well, if last night is any proof, you obviously don't mind having disgusting things in your mouth."

"Oh, that's it! You're in sooooo much trouble," he told her, but I could see how he was much more amused than mad.

He proceeded to get out of the pool, and ran after Maika. She was obviously not giving it her best. She let him catch her, but when he threw her in the pool, she made sure he followed her too.

All the while, I just sat on my chair laughing at their shenanigans.

That was all we really needed to get back to being the amazing trio we always were. No red head devil was ever going be able to break the borderline unhealthy bond the three of us shared. According to Maika, only a psychotic therapist would.

Those people that said that there was one certainty in life and that was that we were all going to die were wrong. I was immortal, until proven wrong. But I did have three certainties in my life and they were named Jayden and Maika. And Lilibeth...

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A/N: Hey guys! :D Brace yourselves, I have a few things to say. First off... I just need to say, I'm so goddamn proud of that Josh-worthy Maika rant. I thought about it at the last minute and I just ADORE it. Sorry! XD I just needed to share my excitement.

Second, some of you might have seen it. I did a live video on instagram on Thursday. (my account is at kaygiard) I'll be doing another one either today at 6PM (eastern time) or on Monday at 8AM. I've asked you guys to vote for your favourite time. I'll decide when I wake up.

This time, I'll be a bit more organize. I actually plan on doing live videos like this once a week to get you guys up to date with my writing and to just interact with you. I had a lot of fun on Thursday. :D I'll do a post called Instagram Livestream Shenanigans where I'll put the sort of schedule I want to follow, the topic I want us to geek out about and what not, and then after doing the video I'll put all the references I made, books, comics etc, and I'll write down questions I might not have been able to answer that I'll answer on the next livestream.

I've got to say, I've been uploading pretty much at the same rate as I used to when I started out on Wattpad, like 9 years ago, and it's making me super excited and motivated. If you haven't seen, Weird and Weirder is up. It's Josh and Daph's story. I'll upload the next chapter on Monday most probably.

So, I think that covers it. Thanks to everyone who read this all the way through. I LOVE YOU! :P