19 |I wasn't supposed to fall for her|
The hallway is loud with the usual
shouting, lockers slamming, voices carrying down the long corridor.
I'm barely paying attention to any of it, my focus is entirely on spotting Luna.
She'll be here any minute, and my whole morning hinges on catching her before class, sneaking in a kiss, maybe a soft "good morning" in her ear. Just thinking about it makes me feel warm.
But before I can settle into my daydream, Sarah and Megan flank me on either side, all giggles and nudges.
"So?" Sarah drawls, smirking. "How was it?"
I roll my eyes, even though a smile is already tugging at my lips. "It was... nice."
"Nice?" Megan snorts. "Nice? You've been talking about this girl for weeks, and all you're giving us is 'nice'? Come on, Naomi."
I feel myself blush, but I can't wipe the smile off my face.
"What do you want me to say?" I try to keep my voice low, like I can keep this between us, but Sarah and Megan are having none of it. "Fine, it was... amazing, okay? We watched a movie."
"That's it?" Sarah whines. "Come on, there has to be more! The way you two were eye-fucking in class yesterday-"
"Shut up," I interrupt, blushing.
They both giggle and I do not mind because goodness I feel like I've already started needing to see her. Like I'm addicted or something.
Sarah starts teasing again.
I glance over my shoulder, half-hoping to catch Luna down the hall.
I'm just waiting for her to get here.
"Aw, that's so cute," Sarah starts, mock-pouting. "So, what about the dare?"
I freeze for a second, and my heart sinks. Right.
The dare.
It was supposed to be harmless.
Date someone for three months and the plan was to get someone's attention, string them along for a bit, and see how long they could keep me hooked.
But things with Luna are different now. It's not just a game anymore, not even close. But I can't admit that
"Oh, don't worry," I say, forcing a laugh that sounds too fake to my own ears. "I'm still messing around. Got, like, what, four weeks left until this nightmare is over?"
I shoot them a weak grin, but it feels wrong even saying it.
Sarah and Megan laugh, and Megan nudges my shoulder.
"Well, at least you're getting something fun out of it."
I'm about to reply-probably some half-baked attempt to steer the conversation away from the dare-when Sarah's eyes widen as she looks over my shoulder.
"Oh my God, Naomi," she whispers, her voice dropping to a horrified tone.
I spin around, and my stomach twists painfully. Luna is standing a few feet away, her face pale, eyes glistening with tears that are already beginning to spill.
She just stares at me, and I can only imagine how she is feeling. Hurt, betrayed, used.
My fucking loud mouth.
By the tears on her face, I can tell she heard more than she should.
She heard it all.
That her being my girlfriend is nothing but a stupid dare and she means nothing to me. She's just my toy thing.
Fuck I'm pathetic.
Before I can even open my mouth, she turns and bolts down the hallway, disappearing into the crowd.
"Luna, wait!" I shout, already pushing through the throng of students, barely registering the sympathetic looks Sarah and Megan throw my way. "Luna, please, just stop!"
But she's faster, weaving through the crowd, her head ducked low, shoulders shaking.
The hallway feels like it's closing in around me as I watch Luna walk away. Her back, stiff with anger, is the only thing I can focus on, even as the noise of lockers slamming and chatter fills the air.
I feel a knot in my chest tighten painfully, and I barely notice when Sarah and Megan exchange worried glances behind me. They're whispering, but I can't hear them.
This isn't how things were supposed to go. Not even close.
The dare was supposed to be a joke-a stupid game to pass the time. A distraction.
I wasn't supposed to feel anything real.
I wasn't supposed to fall for her.
And I sure as hell wasn't supposed to hurt her.
But this isn't a joke anymore.
It hasn't been for a long time.
"Naomi?" Sarah's voice cuts through my thoughts, soft with concern, but I barely turn.
She reaches out to touch my shoulder, and I shrug it off. I'm rooted to the spot, like if I stay here long enough, she'll come back.
Like I can rewind to a few minutes ago before any of this happened, when I was just looking forward to seeing her. But I've ruined it.
When I finally get my feet to move, I don't go after her. Instead, I walk slowly toward the side doors, slipping outside to escape the hallway's prying eyes.
Cold air hits my face, but it doesn't clear my mind.
I stand there, staring at nothing, my heart beating painfully in my chest as I replay every moment from the last few weeks in my mind, every look she gave me, every smile, every kiss. Every touch.
A part of me wants to go after her to explain everything, to beg her to forgive me. But I don't know if she would even listen.
Maybe I don't deserve her forgiveness.
My fists clench as the memory of last night comes flooding back.
The way I felt the most loves when she smiled at me. The way her eyes searched mine like I was something special.
Last night, I forgot everything-every lie, the stupid dare, everything. I felt happy.
The truth is, I didn't think I'd care this much.
When Sarah first brought up the dare, it was supposed to be fun. No strings, no attachments.
But the more time I spent with Luna, the more I realized that it wasn't just a game. She was funny and kind, and she had this way of looking at me that made me feel like I mattered.
Like I was important to her. And, god, I loved that feeling. I wanted her.
I run a hand through my hair.
I think about all the times I could've told her the truth, all the moments when I could've stopped this before it got out of hand.
But I was too scared and selfish. I didn't want to lose her, even if it meant lying. Now, I've lost her anyway.
I thought if I played my cards right, she would never have to know. I would have just broken up with her in the next four weeks over a lame excuse and all of it would have been a thing of the past.
But that was the problem. It wasn't a game to her. It was real.
I've hurt her. I can't take back.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I pull it out, almost hoping it's her. A part of me clings to the possibility that maybe she'll give me a chance to explain. But it's just another message from Sarah, probably checking if I'm okay, asking where I went.
I shove it back into my pocket. I can't deal with them right now. I don't want to deal with anyone. The only person I want to see is the one person who wants nothing to do with me.
I can feel the tears prickling at the corners of my eyes, but I force them down, biting my lip hard enough to hurt.
I don't get to cry.
I don't get to feel sorry for myself because this is my fault.
I'm the one who ruined everything.
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: AzTruyen.Top