I play the recording again. My heart pounds in my chest and my whole body feels like ice. I can't stop the trembling of my lips and the silent tears that fall down my cheeks, my eyes stinging.

I curl myself up on my bed as I listen, clinging to my pillow as heavy sobs leave my mouth, making my chest lurch and ache. Hearing Mr Salt's voice makes my toes curl and a new wave of tears spill into the pillow.

"So, how has Ivy done on the interviews?" Mr Salt asks, his voice distant and slightly distorted on the recording.

"Excellently," Marucs replies.

"She is a very intelligent girl. It's a shame she put in all that effort though," Mr Salt says.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, Mr Kaiser. You will not be giving Ivy that job in your department."

"With all due respect, that isn't your decision, Mr Salt. Nor is it any of your business."

Mr Salt laughs, the sound cruel and arrogant.

"That's where you are wrong, Mr Kaiser," he says. "Now, you and your precious Commander may have been successful in removing me from the chain of command when it comes to your department. For that, I congratulate you. Game well played. But I am still the Minister of Defence. You work in my building with my staff, using my equipment and my resources. You and your top-ranking members may work for the president himself, but Ivy works for me and she will continue to work for me even as a low-level intern in your department."

"That isn't exactly the job..." Marcus mutters, frustration leaking through.

"I don't give a shit. All I know about the job is that it will not be going to my Ivy."

"Why?" Marcus asks.

"Two reasons. Number one. That job will take up all her time. She'll stop working here."

"You're not fucking serious," Marucs hisses. "You can't just halt her career because you have a crush."

"Halt her career?" Mr Salt asks. "My dear boy, that is not my intention." His wheezy laugh makes my stomach lurch and bile burns my throat. "Had I known she already works for me, I could have helped her out sooner."

Marcus laughs, the tone mocking. "I can assure you, Gareth, there is no possibility that Ivy will do what you're hoping she'll do in the name of a promotion."

"Oh, no? So, you're genuinely singing her praises, Kaiser? A man like you doesn't give out compliments without some persuasion and Ivy is a beautiful woman."

"The relationship Ivy and I share is completely professional. She has gained my praise through her skill and hard work alone and nothing else. I, unlike you, don't prey on the women who work for me. I certainly don't coerce them into performing sexual favours with the promise of either furthering their careers or, if that doesn't work, threatening to destroy them."

Mr Salt guffaws then stops to let out a wheezy cough. "You make it sound so vulgar, Marcus. There is nothing wrong with a woman choosing to use her body to help further her career." He emphasises the word choosing, but it just sends cold shivers running through me.

Marcus lets out a disgusted huff.

"And I'm sure, that after a devastating rejection, Ivy would jump at the chance to find another way to rise through the ranks."

"You're a disgrace," Marcus sneers. "You're seriously stopping this woman from getting a job she's worked so hard for just so she'll continue to work here and serve you?"

"Yep," he says cockily. "But now, I have what I need to get what I want from her."

Marcus doesn't reply.

"Oh don't give me that look, Kaiser," Mr Salt laughs, "I saw the way looked at her. You want her as much as I do. I mean, look at her ass in those trousers. The things I would do to her."

"Please, you don't have the stamina or parts to please a woman."

"Who said anything about pleasing her?"

Bile rises back in my throat and I stand up. I rush from my bed and into my bathroom, vomiting into the toilet. When I stop, I stand shakily and clean myself up a little bit, flushing the toilet before rinsing my mouth out with water and then splashing some on my clammy face.

I am numb as I walk back into my room. I sit on my bed and rewind the recording to where I was before I was sick.

"You're a disgusting man," Marucs hisses. "You are a disgrace to your position. You should have been sacked years ago."

Mr Salt laughs. "Aww, are you going to report me, Mr Kaiser?" he mocks. "Did I say some nasty things? Are you going to run to your commander and tell him everything?"

Marcus doesn't reply and I can practically hear the smirk in Mr Salt's voice. "There is nothing you can do to get rid of me, Marcus. I have too many friends and you have no evidence of any wrongdoing. You're stuck with me and whilst I'm in the position I am in, I am ordering you not to give that job to Ivy. If you do, I will do everything in my power to destroy her reputation, do you understand me? Once I'm done with her, she wouldn't be able to get a job in the local supermarket, let alone in defence."

"Really?" Marcus asks. "She's a waitress you see a couple of times a week and you'd do all of that to her just because she got a job that means she couldn't serve you anymore? You're that obsessed with her?"

"I would send her to a prison accused of being a spy before I let her start working with you. And do you know why, Kaiser?"

"Enlighten me," he replies sarcastically.

"Because I saw the way you looked at her and I can see how much it pisses you off that I have so much power over her. I do love it when I get in the way of your grand plans. I love it even more when I can enrage you whilst I do it, and better yet, when you know you can't do anything about it. I live for this shit," he gloats. "You took something from me. Now, I'm taking something from you."

"What was your second reason?" Marcus asks, his voice strained.

"A friend of mine has a daughter also applying for the job."

"I am not giving it to Serena," Marcus says dryly.

"But you are. Her father has donated a lot of money to the MOD and various other industries working toward the war. For some reason, his stupid daughter wants to work with you, probably because she wants to get in your pants," he comments dryly. "Anyway, as a thank you for his generous donations, she is going to get the job."

"That isn't how my department works."

"But it is, Mr Kaiser. Because you may have frozen me out of all the secretive bullshit, but I still get a say about staffing. Give Serena the job, or I'll find a way to shut your department down."

Silence hangs in the air between them.

"You should be careful," Marcus finally says. "You may hold power for now, but you won't have it forever. You're an old, fat pervert. It won't be long before word gets out about your predatory ways. Either that or a heart attack."

"I didn't take you as naïve, Mr Kaiser. Any loose ends regarding my appetite have been dealt with by my very, very powerful friends. I can assure you there is no evidence and no one in their right mind would dare publicly accuse me of such heinous acts. As for the heart attack, well, my very expensive doctor says I'm extremely healthy for my age, so I wouldn't worry about that."

I stop the recording, my stomach still twisting. I lie in my bed, staring up at the ceiling in the darkness, my mind spinning.

No wonder Marcus had left the restaurant with rage radiating off him. And just thinking about that smug look Mr Salt had given me sends a fresh wave of nausea pulsing through me. I had suspected that the meeting had not gone Marcus' way. But this. I never could have imagined this.

I groan, my eyes and cheeks stinging from the tears. Everywhere just aches. I don't know what to do. I don't understand what I'm feeling.

I needed this job. My realm is relying on it. It is the only way to get close to Marcus and find out the secrets I need to help put a stop to this war before it can begin. I've failed them.

But I also ache at the thought of never being able to work with Marcus. A small part of me was desperate for it, not just to save my realm, but because it would have been so much fun working with a man like that. The things I would have learned to add to my arsenal of skills and talents.

Being close to Marcus.

I take in a sharp breath as I think about the final part. No, I shouldn't want to get close to him.

But I do. And the thought of not being able to because of Gareth Salt and his twisted obsession with me, an obsession I fed in order to manipulate him, makes me feel revolting and dirty.

How has it backfired like this? How has this happened?

Before I can stop it, fresh tears fall once more, making my eyes burn. This isn't how it was supposed to happen. I'm Rowan Elliot. I get what I want. What do I do now? What can I do?

Sobs leave my mouth once more, making my chest heave. I clutch my pillow tightly as rage and helplessness wash through me, my mind going completely blank but for self-pity.

Mother's face pops into my head. Shame, deep and heavy consumes me as I picture her disappointment.

"Feeling sorry for oneself is a weak man's game and it has no place in our world. If you fail, pick yourself up. Figure out your shit and fight back. Redbird women don't roll over and let people walk over them. We are the danger. We are the ones who make them cower. We come out on top. Always. So, get your arse up and figure out how you're going to fix this mess, preferably in a way that makes those who wronged you suffer."

I sit up and take in a slow, shaking breath. My knees are weak as I stand and I wobble toward the bathroom once more. Once inside, I turn on the taps and begin running the bath. As I catch my reflection in the mirror, my shame only increases, filling me with disgust. My eyes are bloodshot and puffy. Tear stains mark my skin in between large red blotches.

I look like a mess.

I was trained better than this.

Looking away quickly, I make my way to my kitchen and pour myself a large glass of red wine. When I return to the bathroom with it, the tub is at the level I want, full of steaming water. I drop in my favourite bath bomb. The scent of lilies and jasmine wafts into the air, reminding me of my mother once more. This time, it is comforting.

Stripping out of my work uniform, which is creased and stained, I drop it on the floor and sink into the warm water.

Slowly, I sip at the wine as I allow my muscles to relax and soak up the pleasant warmth. I stare at the wall blankly and think back to my meltdown.

Despite feeling shame toward my reaction, I am glad I got it all out. Some emotions can't be bottled up. But no more. I have been setback. So now I think of a new plan.

Serena is getting the job.

I force myself not to clench up with rage at that thought and remain calm. Still, my hands grip around the wine glass tighter and the urge to throw it and smash it into thousands of pieces surges through me almost uncontrollably.

I let out another long breath.

Calm, Rowan.

Serena is going to get the job. When it is announced, there is no doubt she will brag. When that happens, I will not get angry. I will not give her the satisfaction. I will not let her take my dignity.

So, I will smile. The smile will be genuine, it will be kind. I will congratulate her and there will be no jealousy or bitterness in my voice. No one will see my disappointment. They will see the perfect, put-together, intelligent, kind Ivy that I have created.

My next step will be to continue to get close to Marcus. I don't need a job to do that. If anything, this is an opportunity. There is no way Marcus would pursue or allow a relationship with me if he was my superior. He would never be so unprofessional.

But now, nothing is stopping him.

I will make him love me.

But before all of that. I will kill Gareth Salt. Slowly and painfully, not stopping until he begs for my forgiveness.

I laugh to myself and sip at my wine.

I'll be doing this realm a favour.