The night was still. The gentle tone of the waves was a lullaby. A beautiful but dangerous tune that had the power to heal and destroy with the help of the wind and the earth. Three such peaceful elements could be so destructive when they weren't working in harmony.

I sat in the gazebo on Aiden's rooftop while Zoerina stared out at the vast open night. This one wasn't like the nightmares. It was alight with stars and the sound of passing cars. The scent of the salt sea and cigarettes was refreshing and welcomed. I would take that over the stench of blood no matter the occasion.

Zoerina dragged her cigarette as her knee bounced. Her hair was in a bun on the top of her head and she slipped her hand under her t-shirt as she rubbed her toned stomach. She hadn't said much since she brought me up here. I was curious to know what she had to talk about. But she insisted that she have a cigarette first.

"My brother told you," she suddenly spoke, a cloud of smoke billowing from between her lips. "He told you that I was in an abusive relationship, right?"

I nodded.

"Look, I'm not the best at apologising," she dragged on her cigarette again. There was a brief pause. "And usually, I don't. But you deserve to hear that I'm sorry. I passed judgement too fast. I of all people should know that there are people facing silent battles all the time."

"I mean, I understand. You were looking out for Aiden. It didn't look good I suppose."

"Yeah well the point is that I'm sorry," she looked me dead in the eye this time. "I'm sorry for what you've been through and what you will go through. Because that motherfucker might be dead. But it's not over. Believe me. You have to heal. And it's so hard."

"Yeah, I'm feeling that," I said as she stubbed her cigarette out in the ash tray. She folded her arms and listened. "But I really do admire you. You're so strong."

She scoffed with amusement. "I'm not strong. I depended on drugs for years. I did some messed up shit and I'm hostile as hell. For real, I don't trust people and I hate human beings. On my life. Socialising makes me want to hurl."

I laughed at how deadpan she was when she spat her slew of truths. It was clear that she meant it though. "You seem to be doing well now. You certainly don't look like an addict."

"That's because I'm clean and have been for a while," she gave me a small shrug. "I saw photos of what I looked like when I was deep in a heroine addiction. It wasn't cute. I'm not going back there again."

"Then you are strong," I assured her with a soft smile.

"I don't feel strong. Not always. I'm constantly fighting the impulse to use again. Because sometimes it feels tempting to quiet the pain and fucked up memories. But it doesn't work. It just makes things so much worse."

I didn't want to tell her that, that was obvious. Addiction is a disease and I had no right to judge her battles. But knowing what could happen after just one time using drugs, I knew that I would never turn to it as a form of coping. I hadn't before and I wasn't about to start now.

"I'm not really good at the advice stuff," she continued with a slight shrug. "I really have no right to tell someone how to deal with their trauma because I did it all fucking wrong. But what I will tell you is that who you are does not start and end with what you've been through. You can own it. Or you can never talk about it again. You choose because it's your shit. But just know that you're not a victim. You're a survivor. And that's something to be proud of."

I felt the threat of tears welling in my eyes. I gave her a grateful nod. She was a lot better at advice than she thought. "Thanks Zoerina."

She stared at me for a while. It was quiet and sort of awkward but then her gaze narrowed and she inhaled a deep breath. "It must have been hard for Aiden not to torture the fuck out of the man that did that to you."

"W-what?"

"Maddie said he was furious," she emphasised. "Like so fucking mad at the thought of someone touching you. I think he probably wanted to drag that punishment out a bit."

I didn't dispute what she said. But when I thought back to that moment in the apartment, it was hard to imagine. Aiden had been so gentle and caring. Even when he was unloading a chamber of bullets into Desmond.

"Why didn't he?"

She chuckled. "Because Aiden is probably the most selfless person that I know. He wouldn't do that in front of someone innocent like you."

My heart fluttered. The pitter patter made me feel a little more human than I had before. It was the kind of emotion that I needed to feel more of.

"You really care about him, huh?"

I nodded with a sheepish smile. "Yeah. He's. . . amazing."

Zoerina's smiling pout wrapped around the end of another cigarette and she cupped her hand at the tip as she lit a flame with her lighter. "Must be nice," she said, exhaling. "I wish it was simpler for Po and I. But he's so fucking stubborn."

"He doesn't want to be with you?"

She averted her thoughtful gaze for a moment and sighed with exasperation. "It's just. . . complicated. Ya know. It always has been I suppose. We met in high school when I was like fifteen. Friends first but I crushed hard. Ya know—" she rolled her eyes — "as you do. So after a few drinks at a party one evening, we slept together. But back then, Po had no idea that he was Asexual. He said he didn't feel the need to continue sleeping with me but he still cared. I think it fucked him up a lot. He didn't understand what he was going through.

"It sucked. I felt a lot for him. But then like six months later, he slept with this guy in our class and it made me so upset. Like, it's all good and well to say that I should have been more understanding, but I was a fifteen year old girl and I loved him. Like I was so irrationally jealous. It was insane.

"So I started dating this drop kick. I can say that now. But at the time, he was so hot. Beanies and hoodies with his messed hair and tattoos. He was older. I think about nineteen. He introduced me to weed and Po being my 'best friend' I shared with him too.

"It went on for a while. But when Dad died I just. . . I did not cope. I started using harder drugs. Cocaine. Heroine. Plus I dragged Po along with me. So fucked up. But Aiden helped us both. He was always looking out. And he did. Mom was still grieving. So she did what she could but Aiden locked us up. Detoxed us. Had his mates help to keep us under control. It worked.

"But then I was assaulted by Mom's boyfriend when I was nineteen and I relapsed again. Po was more aware of who he was at this point. Like he'd figured it out while he was sober. So I understood him more than I ever had. But he was a crutch for me and whenever I relapsed, he did too.

"It was worse for him that time. He did some fucked up shit and ended up in trouble. But Aiden helped him out again. He came through no matter what. But eventually he kind of demanded that I keep my distance from Po. And fair enough. I kept screwing him over by dragging him down with me. It's like that saying or whatever. People pressure others to sin because they don't want to sin alone. It was true. I didn't want to feel fucked up by myself."

By the end of her long winded story, she'd almost finished her cigarette. She exhaled a deep breath. "But it's different now. We're both in a better place. I've been clean for longer than I have in a long time. I stayed clean while I was with my asshole ex. While I was travelling alone for two years. I feel like I overcame all this shit and it's our time," she arched a brow, stubbing out her cig. "Ya know what I mean?"

I nodded. "Sure. Everyone deserves to embrace their time."

"Right? But he's so stubborn about it. He thinks that he's not good enough for me and that we'll be a bad influence on each other. I know that it would be fine though. If we both wanted it enough. Plus we could help each other when temptation comes along. It does from time to time."

I hadn't been in the same room as them a lot. But when I was, it was obvious that there was a strong connection. The tension was hard to ignore. But I saw the look in Hunapo's eyes when he watched Zoerina. He cared about her so much. It was sad to think that he didn't believe that he deserved her.

"Plus," she continued. "He thinks that I deserve someone with a sex drive. But duh, I have like seven vibrators. I'll be fine."

My yawn turned into an abrupt chuckle as she nonchalantly shrugged. I knew that I liked Zoerina. She just needed to realise that I wasn't the scamming bitch that her mind had conjured me up to be. She said what she wanted and she made no apologies for it. I could respect that. At least you always knew what you were getting with her.

"You look tired as hell," she stood up and stretched. "Sorry for offloading like that. You're easy to talk to."

I stood as well and felt the fatigue become more prominent once I was on my feet. "I'm always here to listen," I told her as she slipped her hands into her pockets. "And despite the fact that you think you're no good at advice, what you said did help. Thank you."

"Yeah," she smiled. "It's sweet."

Downstairs, in the living room, Aiden was sitting on the couch with a bottle of water, some pain relief and no shirt on. He made my stomach twist and turn in the best sort of way. Who knows how long Zoerina and I had been up on the roof. But when he stood up and walked towards me, he seemed nothing short of grateful to be near me again. Which is what I felt as well.

The pain relief washed down with a chilled water. The plastic stung pressed against the splits on my lip but I wiped the water off and followed Aiden to his bedroom where we curled up in his bed. He wrapped an arm around me while I laid on his chest and watched the beautiful stars in the night.

This view was transporting. I felt a million miles from all of the pain that I'd endured in the last few days. But Aiden's hand rubbing gentle circles on my back reminded me that it was real. However, it also reminded me that it couldn't be all bad. That happiness was within arms reach. That I had to be grateful that someone wanted to love the broken pieces back together.

How many girls weren't offered the same level of support?

Too many.

"Your sister is sort of wonderful," I murmured as the rising and falling of his chest swelled underneath me.

He chuckled. "She has her moments. I hope that she wasn't too rough with her words of wisdom."

"No not at all. Besides, I like that she's so honest. What she said helped."

He softly kissed the top of my head and held me a little tighter. "That's good."

"I'm not a victim," I murmured as my eye lids began to get heavier. "I'm a survivor."

"Yeah baby," he bent his leg so that the sheets draped from his knee and blocked the view. But I was too tired to complain. "You're so damn strong."

"Aiden?"

"Mhmm?"

"I met this girl," I squeezed my eyes open and shut a few times so that I could deliver what I needed to say with coherency. "From what she told me, I think her step father might have been a victim of yours. She was living on the streets."

His fingers swept through the strands of my hair as he listened. "Oh?"

"I set her up in a hotel for a few nights. This was the morning that Desmond—"

"Yep."

"Yeah. I thought that maybe we could help her?"

"Of course," he pressed a kiss against my head. "We'll go and see her in the morning if you want? I'll do what I can."

I smiled. I knew that he would want to help.

"You should get some sleep, Ari. Remember that I'm right here. You're safe with me."

I snuggled in deeper and let my fingertips feel his smooth firm chest beneath me. He was real, he was here. As hard as that was to believe after all that had happened. I truly was safe with him and I hoped that made a difference to how I slept.

____

Sorry that this chapter wasn't as eventful as some of the others. But it was important to see a development in Zoerina and Arian's friendship :)