dawg when I tell you this is exactly why I went to the hospital, why I went to the er, that night this is exactly what I was feeling, im finna attach this tiktok but this is exactly what it was it was secondhand suicide I'm not scared to commit I'm not but the people imma leave behind and the blame that's going to be on me it's gonna be a lot for me even though I'm gonna dead its gonna be like this really fucked up of me to do this to them and I can't do it that's the only reason. andddddddd I won't do it either because my friends not freaking get my colored "x" first. no