They ended up dining on cold troll as Sir Mikael was unable to find a trace of any creature other than a buzzard who was circling around overhead. Once everyone had their fill, other than Princess Wartha who refused to touch the stuff, Sir Mikael said "Well, shall we be on our way?"

""Yeah let's get going," Fabian said. "Hey, Briawny may be gone, but her horse is still here. I was thinking I could claim it for myself and Scrote and the Princess could ride with you, Mikey."

Fabian approached Finnegrine, but the horse snarled at him and attempted to kick him in the head, missing only narrowly.

"I don't think he likes you," Brandon said. "I've ridden on him before behind Briawny. Maybe he'll let me mount him." Finnegrine actually bent down a little bit in order to let Brandon climb on his back.

"I'm riding with you," Princess Wartha said as she mounted the horse and wrapped her arms around Brandon.

"Looks like you're in your normal spot on the back of Rothchild," Sir Mikael said as Fabian reluctantly climbed on the horse. Sir Mikael proceeded to lead them in the complete opposite direction from which Fabian had attempted to take them the previous day.

"Are you sure you know where you're going?" Fabian asked. "This is pretty tricky terrain even for an expert navigator such as myself. It's easy to get lost."

"Are you jesting again?" Sir Mikael asked. "Everyone knows that's the Ravine of Krell's Sorrow. It's one of the most famous geographical features within hundreds of leagues of here. If you can't orient yourself from that you must be really terrible at directions. Heh heh. I'd pay good money to see the total idiot who got lost when they had that as their starting point."

"Yeah, that would be pretty funny," Fabian said. "Can you imagine? So, uh, I obviously know exactly where we are, but for the benefit of our young friends would you mind telling us how long it's going to take us to get back to Wooglebury?"

"Yeah, are we there yet?" Princess Wartha asked.

"Well, the Ravine of Krell's Sorrow marks the border between the kingdoms of Syrenia and Yangwe as everyone knows. We're on the Syrenian side, which is exactly where we want to be. As soon as we descend from these hills it should be a solid day's ride across the lowlands of Syrenia and as long as we're not delayed I see no reason why we shouldn't be back in Wingwang by nightfall."

"Right, but are we there yet?" Princess Wartha asked.

"Well, as I just mentioned we must descend into the lowlands and then journey for about a day before we reach our destination."

"Yeah, I got that part," Princess Wartha said. "So are we there yet or what?"

"There you have it, Mikey. Your reward for a quest well done. You ready to be married to that for the next fifty years or so?"

"The princess is young and has probably not travelled far from Wooglebury other than when she was kidnapped against her will. There is plenty of time for her to receive a well rounded education."

"Yeah, I'll bet she can't wait to crack the books. She seems like the real studious type, don't you think?"

"Everyone learns at their own pace," Sir Mikael said. "And you would do well to remember the important part of life is the journey and not the destination."

"Yeah, whatever. I'm sick of this journey. Let's get to our destination and get paid."

About an hour later they passed through a familiar looking village full of slack jawed peasants. Fabian was sure they were in awe of him this time since he had just passed through a few days ago and encountering a legend of his caliber was undoubtedly one of the highlights of their pathetic little lives. Unfortunately not a single person seemed to remember him, although they were all very excited to see Rothchild again and asked if they could pet the horsey.

They managed to score a decent meal to make up for the nasty troll meat they'd been forced to eat and stocked up on rations again before heading on their way. They passed several lakes and streams that had been tar the last time they came through here but now appeared to be fresh blue water.

The sun was just beginning to set when Sir Mikael announced they had nearly reached the border between Syrenia and Wooglebury. The capital city of Wingwang would be just a short ride once they crossed the border.

"If you look closely you can see the lights of the city off in the distance starting to turn on."

"Yeah, but are we there yet?" Princess Wartha asked.

That was when they heard a series of loud thumping sounds and the ground beneath them began to shake. A huge man standing easily over thirty feet tall suddenly came strolling around a hill off to their left.

"What in the fucking hell is that?" Fabian asked.

"Remember that giant I mentioned before?" Sir Mikael said. "I'm pretty sure that's him."

"Is he a nice giant?"

"Not particularly, from what I understand."

The giant appeared to have spotted them as he began heading straight towards them. The ground shook violently with every step he took.

"Are you guys ready to fight a giant?" Fabian asked. "I mean, I've killed many giants in my day so I thought I'd sit back and let you two have the fun of doing it."

"I'm not sure what our little swords are going to do against something like that," Sir Mikael said. "Perhaps we would be best served by running away."

"Come on, we took down a ten headed dragon, for Balthazaar's sake. I mean, granted, that was mostly due to me, but still. What's one measly giant compared to that? I think we should stay and fight, and if he ends up killing you guys, I'll take the princess and run away. It's a really solid plan."

The giant stepped on a huge boulder and it broke apart under his weight as if it were made of glass.

"Okay, that's pretty scary. I think you're right. We should run. You guys stay back and try to hold him off while the princess and I make a break for it. Then once we're safely out of range you can make a break for it."

"Uh, guys?" Brandon said. "I think we're too late."

The giant easily reached them in just a few strides. "What have we here? Tiny little people? Boomer is hungry, but maybe not too hungry as he just ate that water buffalo. Perhaps a light snack. Let's see. This one looks tasty."

He reached down and plucked Princess Wartha off the back of her horse. He popped her into his mouth, chewed a few times, and then swallowed. Then he spat out her dress.

"Yummy. That will tide Boomer over until dinner. Have a good day, tiny little people."

The giant, who was apparently known as Boomer, walked off into the hills. Gradually the thudding sound quieted and the ground stopped shaking.

"Oh no," Sir Mikael said. "He ate the princess! Do you realize what this means?"

"That there's one less annoying chick in the world?" Fabian asked.

"I-" Sir Mikael seemed at a loss for words. "I've failed in my quest. I have brought great dishonor upon myself and my family name. I promised King Wangdangdoodle I would bring his daughter back unharmed and I have not lived up to my word. I am unworthy of the title of paladin."

"Yeah, well them's the breaks," Fabian said with a shrug.

"I must atone for my sins," Sir Mikael said with a determined look on his face. "I must do penance. I will wander alone through the wastelands of Nyrellia for an entire year and meditate upon my failure. Then, and only then, might it be possible to show my face around these parts again."

"Uh, if you're heading into the wastelands of Nyrellia, I'm going to get off here if you don't mind." Fabian leaped off the back of the horse.

"Yes. To the wastelands of Nyrellia I must go. There is no time to lose. My penance must begin immediately. Farewell comrades. Perhaps someday our paths shall cross again. And if that day comes may it be under happier circumstances." Sir Mikael whipped the reins and Rothchild took off at a swift gallop. Soon they had disappeared in the distance and Fabian was left alone with Brandon and Finnegrine the horse.

"Looks like it's you and me, Scrote. It's too bad about the princess. Not that she's dead. I couldn't care less about that. I just doubt the king is going to pay out when we can't exactly return his daughter to him."

"I can't believe she's gone," Brandon said as he wiped away a tear. "We were so close to our destination, too. You can see the castle towers from here. And what about poor Oogums?"

"Yes," Fabian said thoughtfully. "What about poor Oogums? You know, Scrote, rescuing the princess was never our true quest anyway. It was just a side journey on the way to our real objective. Recovering that cat and getting paid a sweet reward for it. All is not yet lost."

"But how are we going to get the cat back if we don't have the princess?" Brandon asked. "King Wangdangdoodle seemed pretty serious about not giving the cat up without the safe return of his daughter."

"It just so happens I have a plan," Fabian said. "But I need to know, can I count on you?"

"Of course you can count on me," Brandon said. "Oogums needs to be returned to his rightful owner."

"You're not going to pussyfoot around on me and talk about settling down and starting a family? Because that's loser talk, Scrote. You're either in or you're out."

"I'm in to the end," Brandon said. "And beyond if need be. The princess's death has to mean something. Along with Briawny, Derek, Druvidia, and everyone else we've lost along the way. I've changed my mind about living the quiet life, sir. You're right. I'm an adventurer through and through and I'll do whatever it takes to see our quest through to the finish. And then the next quest after that. And the one after that."

"Good. Now put this on." Fabian said as he held forth the princess's dress.

"Excuse me, sir?"

"Put on the dress, Scrote. We're going to pass you off as the princess."

"Uh, I'm pretty sure the king's going to know I'm not his daughter."

"She's been cooped up in a tiny little cage for who knows how long. You think that's not going to have an effect on her appearance? Plus, she was kidnapped by a wizard. He could have used magic on her to make her look different. The important thing is we have the dress. That will serve to authenticate our story. Now put it on."

"Okay, sir," Brandon said as he started to put on the dress. "But even if he somehow accepts me as his daughter, what do we do then?"

"Well, we score the reward money for returning the princess. Then we get him to give us the cat. Then we tell him we're so madly in love we need to elope immediately and get married. Then we get the hell out of there and no one's the wiser. It's a foolproof plan. Here, I'll tie some of this dead grass together and you can wear it as a wig. You're looking more and more like the princess by the second. Trust me, Scrote. Nothing could possibly go wrong."