"Are you going to sleep all day or what, mate?" Briawny said as she gave Fabian a little kick in the ribs. "Daylight's wasting."

Fabian opened his eyes with great effort as it felt like they were glued shut. A tiny bit of daylight was barely starting to appear over the hills. Otherwise it was still pitch black. "You've gotta be kidding me, lady. Let me sleep another hour."

"You can sleep here as long as you want, but the rest of us are taking off. I, for one, am happy to leave you behind."

Fabian sat up and immediately winced at the pain in his shoulder.

"I took the liberty of bandaging that up for you, sir," Brandon said. "You lost a lot of blood, but I think you'll heal nicely. Derek taught me a couple of tricks about healing during our time together."

"That guy actually talked about something other than goats?" Fabian said as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "That's amazing."

"Here, we saved you this for breakfast," Briawny said as she shoved the liver of some sort of creature at him. "The rest of us have already eaten. You can take that with you on the road, since you'll be riding in the bitch seat behind Sir Mikael."

"I'm pretty sure whatever seat you're in is the bitch seat," Fabian muttered as he hopped back on the saddle behind the paladin.

"Come on!" Briawny called back as she urged her horse into a gallop. "If we travel hard today we can reach the kingdom of Therosh by nightfall. I have a friend who works in the castle and can probably find us proper beds. From there we'll be less than a day's ride from the wizard's tower."

"A proper bed sounds nice," Fabian conceded. "And in a castle? Is it a good castle this time with lots of fancy stuff? Because that last castle kind of blew."

"Therosh is a small but wealthy kingdom. I'm sure you will find the accommodations satisfactory."

They rode for several hours across a vast grassland before entering a sparsely wooded area. They encountered a stray orc, but Briawny lopped off its head with a single blow as she rode past.

Fabian had been getting jarred around on the horse for hours and between his ass and his shoulder he was in a tremendous amount of pain. He really wished he still had his supply of dreamweed. Maybe someone at the castle could provide a hookup of some sort. The servants often could be relied upon to have something.

The sun was just beginning to set over the horizon when they spotted the castle in the distance. It wasn't big as far as castles went, but it did have a bunch of ornate carvings on the outside that spoke of a decent amount of wealth.

They reached the gate about an hour later and found it was already closed for the night. Briawny dismounted from her horse and rapped loudly on the wooden doors.

"Who goes there?" a voice called down from above.

"Oy! It's Briawny! Is Gareth around?"

"Gareth's in the castle attending to the king. His Majesty is very ill, I'm afraid. Still, I've heard Gareth talk about the brave Briawny before and I know he holds you in high esteem. I'll take you and your companions in to see him."

There was a loud creaking sound and the gates opened slowly. A small man in leather armor greeted them carrying a torch. "An honor it is to meet you, Briawny. I'm Irwin the guard. Let me put your horses in the stable. Then come into the castle and I'll fetch Gareth for you."

He led them across a courtyard filled with numerous fountains and statues covered in ivy. Fabian was starting to like the look of this place more and more. There was sure to be some valuable stuff inside.

Irwin opened up the main doors to the castle and led them into a grand entryway. Twin staircases spiraled upward in either direction. Large paintings and tapestries covered all the walls. There was a pedestal by the doorway that held what appeared to be a solid gold candle holder. Fabian waited until Irwin's back was turned and quickly pocketed it.

"Please wait here while I fetch Gareth. And I hate to ask, but please try to keep quiet. The king is sleeping upstairs and we don't want to disturb him. He needs his rest."

"Sure thing," Fabian said as he spotted a vase that looked like it was made out of jade or something expensive. "We'll be quiet as mice." As soon as Irwin had made his way up the stairs Fabian pocketed the vase.

"I hope the king's all right," Brandon whispered.

"Shut up, Scrote," Fabian said. "Didn't you hear the man? You need to be quiet."

Irwin returned a few minutes later with a plain looking man in fancy robes. His face appeared young but his hair was beginning to turn gray.

"Briawny, my dear old friend," he said as he embraced her. "It's been far too long! What brings you to these parts?"

"We are on a quest to rescue the princess Wartha from the clutches of the evil wizard Delroy. We need a bed to rest in for the night. These are my companions Brandon, Sir Mikael, and some idiot whose name I can't remember."

"I'm the legendary hero Fabian. Perhaps you've heard of me?"

"Can't say that I have," Gareth said with a faint smile. "I can offer you all lodging in the guest rooms, but I'm afraid you haven't arrived at the best time. King Avid is not well, as perhaps you've heard."

"Yeah, we heard," Fabian said. "Has he got the clap or something? Having a little too much fun carrying out his kingly duties with the ladies?"

"King Avid is ninety-seven years old. He doesn't carry on with young ladies. No, I'm afraid he's afflicted with a high fever. He hasn't arisen from his bed in the last three weeks."

"I stayed in bed for three weeks once," Fabian said. "Of course I was tearing my way through the legendary brothels of Hyfus. Now that was a good time. Granted, I actually did catch the clap after that, as well as a few other nasty bugs, but it was most assuredly worth it."

"Yes, I see," Gareth flashed the faint smile again. "Anyway, I've recently been promoted to the position of chief advisor to the king, so his health has been a matter of some concern to me. I spend day and night worrying about his well-being and it's taken a bit of a toll on me. Oh, but you'll have to forgive me. You all must be very hungry from your travels. Allow me to escort you to the dining room and we'll have the servants prepare you a fine meal."

"Now you're talking, pal," Fabian said as he slapped Gareth on the back companionably. He took the opportunity to rifle through his pockets, but he only found a couple lousy copper shillings. He took them anyway.

They went down a short hallway and emerged in a big room with a long wooden table. The chairs all had soft velvet cushions and the utensils appeared to be made of genuine silver. Fabian made sure to pocket as many of them as he could on the way to his seat, which felt heavenly on his sore ass. "A fellow could get used to chairs like these," he said to himself.

"Irwin will see to it that you all are taken care of," Gareth said. "Now, if I may beg your pardon I need to check in on His Majesty. I will return shortly."

"I bet that guy's totally poisoning the king," Fabian said after Gareth had left and Irwin had gone to the kitchen to fetch their food.

"Gareth is an old dear friend of mine and he would do nothing of the sort," Briawny said as she shot Fabian a glare.

"I'm just saying he recently got promoted to chief advisor to the king. That shows he's ambitious. He's probably gone mad with power and now he's taking the old duffer out. It happens all the time."

"I'll not have you talking such swill about my friend. I demand you apologize immediately."

"All right, fine, sorry! But the dude does kind of have a shifty air to him, don't you think? I'm just saying it's within the realm of possibility that he could be poisoning the king."

Briawny picked up a spoon and hucked it at Fabian's head. He managed to barely dodge out of the way. Then he picked it up and shoved it in his pocket. It did appear to be genuine silver after all.

"Okay, okay, I'm sure your friend is a solid, upstanding citizen. I mean he is giving us a free meal and a bed for the night, so that's pretty cool. Of course, it's easy to be generous with someone else's stuff, especially when that someone else is bedridden. But still, I genuinely appreciate it."

"You'd better. I've got no problem asking him to stick you in the worst room."

"Wait, we're getting our own rooms? I don't have to share with you losers? This place is awesome. Thanks for bringing us here, lady."

Irwin returned several minutes later bearing huge plates filled with hot meat and potatoes and a healthy portion of vegetables.

"Oh my goodness," Brandon said. "I think this is the best meal I've ever had in my entire life."

"Say, Irwin," Fabian said as he grabbed the guard by the wrist. "You're in good with all the servants, right? Would you happen to know if any of them could hook a brother up with some dreamweed? I took a nasty wound to my shoulder bravely saving my companions' lives last night. I could use a little something something to dull the pain and help me fall asleep, you know what I mean?"

"Dreamweed is outlawed in Therosh under the order of King Avid," Irwin said.

"Oh, well, that's lame. But come on, the dude's sleeping upstairs. What's he going to do? Besides, I won't tell if you don't. Come on, being a servant sucks. Some of them have to be into getting high."

"We only employ people of the highest character in this court," Irwin said. "I can't get you any dreamweed. I can probably find you some ointment for your wound."

"All right, fine, I'll take it. Now how about some seconds on the chow? I'm freaking starving."

He managed to pick a small leather pouch filled with coins out of Irwin's pocket as he left to fetch more food for Fabian.

"Man, other than the lack of dreamweed, this place is fabulous. It's almost as if it were too good to be true..."