A.N.:

I know I'm updating this story like crazy, I'm having a lot of fun writing it! I hope you're having as much fun reading it <3 we're over halfway, almost three quarters, into this story-there's forty chapters plus an epilogue. And then after that there's a sequel called The Light

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"How much further is this going to be?" Halone asked Nikolai as they dashed through the forest floor. They had been running for miles now, both were panting but it was especially taking a toll on Halone's slowly healing body-what kept her going was knowing there was demons behind her and her children in front of her. She couldn't stop.

"Less than a mile now," Nikolai answered.

"Seeing those demons burn alive those other rebels, what a nasty way to go. It's sickening, but it makes me wonder if we are any better. You know what they say, all's fair in love and war. The sooner it's over the better if you ask me," Nikolai said, "there will no winners, only scarred survivors. Violence begets violence. All this battle has done is bring out the inner sadist in us all."

"It's all for the greater good. A means to an end. Whatever lets us win this war will get us justice, and that's what makes it all worth it. We deserve to win, we're the ones on the right side of history," Halone said, Nikolai huffed in disappointment and Halone chuckled lightly at him.

"What?" she asked.

"Halone," he began, "what would you say if I asked you to run awa-" abruptly he was cut off.

"Stop!" a voice boomed out, "we have arrows pointed at you so don't move a muscle or we'll fire-identify yourselves!".

"I'm Nikolai, Leiden's right hand man, and this is Leiden-one of his elite warriors."

There was a pause.

"Sorry for any alarm, can't be too careful these days, come with me sir and ma'am," a silver and brown wolf emerged from a large thicket, "are you coming from the northeast camp?" they asked as they led Nikolai and Halone in the camp, blood oozed out of their cracked paws and left a crimson trail behind them.

"Yes. Demons got it. Burned it down. No idea how many got out, if any."

"Shit."

"Shit indeed."

"Where are the children kept in this camp? I need to see my children," Halone asked urgently, looking hopefully to the wolf.

"The camp Mother is keeping them on the east side, you'll find them there," the wolf answered.

Halone nodded, "well Nikolai I have to love you and leave you, catch you later," she said, breaking off from their small group and heading in the direction of the children-sniffing at the air to catch a whiff of their scents she had sorely missed in the just over two months she had spent resting and recovering.

"Shadow?! Sky?!" she called out, excitement and anticipation building in her chase as she couldn't run fast enough, racing after their scents.

"Mummy!" Shadow cried out, diving in and out of the bustle of the busy camp as he ran to his mother, she caught him in her arms and hugged him close to her beating heart.

"Oh my God I missed you so much," she wept, allowing tears of joy to fall down her flushed cheeks as she sucked air down to her oxygen starved lungs.

"Halone!" Sky yelled, diving from the bustle of the camp and into her arms, Halone caught her too and encircled Sky's lithe body in a crushingly tight hug, warm and loving.

"My babies," Halone cried.

"Mummy why are you crying?" Shadow asked.

"Sometimes people cry when they're happy," she explained.

"Are you happy?" Sky asked.

"Yes, very happy," Halone sobbed, she gave her children a final squeeze before getting to her feet, wiping away the tears.

A male Okeanous Kynodontes, the same species of Nikolai, approached her-it's two dorsal fins on its back, two small horns and long fluke all hallmarks of its species. It was rare to see them outside of their ocean environment, and the sight of it caused her brow to quirk in curiosity and intrigue.

"Halone?" they asked, Halone remained wordless, suspicious-had Leiden sent them to kill her?

"You were one of the ten survivors from Beretta Camp right?" they asked, "we've got a cave allocated for you."

"Oh," Halone said, "good."

"Let me lead the way."

Being led to a spacious cave that had vines growing over it and soft bedding Halone knew she could get used to the comfort of it, more than the scratchy bedding of her previous camp. Not as nice as her parent's bedding but nothing could ever compare to that.

After being left alone with her children her gaze slunk out to the mouth of the cave, seeing dusk was falling across the darkening sky illuminated by the dying throes of the sun.

"Time for bed," she told her children.

"I'm not tired!" Sky exclaimed.

"Me neither!" Shadow protested.

Oh the joys of putting very much awake children to bed.

"I'll tell you a story, then will you go to bed?" she asked.

"Maaaaaybe," Shadow said with slow deliberation.

"Okay, cuddle up," Halone said, transforming into her feral form so her children could nestle in her soft fur which they readily did, snuggling up close.

"There once was a HDG creature who loved to run," she began, as she continued talking Sky began to yawn and Shadow's eyes began to fall as her words killed them off to sleep. She was barely half way through her story when their snores told Halone her children were fast asleep.

Gently she laid them down to sleep in their individual beds, leaving them to rest while she went out to find Nikolai.

What she found was rabid crowds and the taste of blood thick in the air.

The survivors of Beretta camp had captured demons as prisoners of wars, who they were now torturing. Screams spilt the air that smelt of burning flesh.

As Halone grew closer she saw a demon had been impaled on a wooden cross, his stomach slit wide open and guts spilling across the bloodied dirt.

She felt dirty glares shot at the demon brand on her right bicep, also the blood bond wisps that emitted from her plaits. She knew what they were thinking-she had an illicit love affair with a demon who blood bonded to her.

She ignored them. They didn't know the reality of what actually happened. Being blood bonded to her cocaine addict rapist was already painful enough.

She took in the gore, finding Leiden stood atop of a large rock as he addressed the bloodthirsty crowd.

"We have won another battle my fellow rebels! The demons attacked us and we killed them, we fought tooth and nail till they fled like cowards!" he shouted above the whooping, hollering and howls.

Halone laughed cynically. They hadn't won, only ten survived out of the two hundred that lived in the camp. That alone meant it was a massive blow for the rebellion. And Leiden knew that, that must be why he was lying-to boost morale, use rebel slaughter as propaganda.

He couldn't be trusted. A slippery little beast he was.

But still, the extreme violence all around her ignited her dormant sadistic streak. She could feel a headache starting, a pressure building in the front of her brain, as slowly it took control of her.

Leiden was now no longer a liar, he was bloodthirsty killed just like she was now. He'd never been so appealing, and she craved more-saliva dripped from her jaws as she absorbed the torture all around her, adrenaline pumping as she took in the excess and extreme cruelty and brutality.

All around her were dead and dying, blood and flesh, and this time it was the rebels drinking demon blood-driving them just as rabid as the rebel blood has the demons. They had the same intense, electric energy within their eyes.

"Halone?" a voice called out.

Nikolai.

Her eyes followed the sound of his voice, seeing he was wearing a long sleeve black hoodie which was different to his usual white tank top.

Never before had she wanted to fuck him so hard.

She ran up to him, transforming into her glitched human form to kiss him on the lips, her lips trailing down to suckle teasingly on his neck.

"No," Nikolai said, Halone whined as she reluctantly pulled away, she stared into his eyes with a seductive flutter of her eyelashes.

"Why not?" she asked, trailing her hand along his tattooed arms to feel his muscles. She noticed him flinch under her touch.

"I don't want our wounds to reopen," he said.

"Our?".

"I mean yours," he corrected himself coldly.

Her headache subsided, as did all her desire to sleep with him. Worry flooded her body, now she was back in control of her body and not that shameful, shamelessly sadistic monster.

"Nikolai, who hurt you?" she asked, remember his arm flinch she pulled up the sleeve of his black hoodie to see bloodied bandages wrapped around his forearm.

"Don't worry about it."

"Did Leiden do this?".

"No."

"Then who?!".

"I said don't worry about it."

"But-".

"No butts, just take the hint and fucking drop it Halone."

"Let's get out of here, the violence is making me feel sick," he said before exiting, Halone followed along behind him.

He led her to a lake, they sat under a grand oak tree and Nikolai pulled out a bottle of vodka from the secret hole he'd cut into the bark.

"Wanna swig?" he asked, Halone accepted and swallowed the burning liquid without so much as a flinch.

"Shit you're hardcore," he laughed, she couldn't help but laugh too.

"I missed our chats."

"Me too. I missed you."

"You're too kind."

Nikolai sighed, "I'm not. I'm really not. All the shit I've done is the exact antithesis of kind."

"The demons deserved it."

"So I keep hearing."

"I've gotta be honest with you Halone," he said as he swallowed down some vodka for strength before passing her the bottle, "the rebellion has changed...or maybe just it's me...I've changed...the senseless violence, how degraded and disturbing the rebels are becoming. Maybe it's always been this way and I just never saw it, never thought to question it. I'm a soldier, we don't think we just do. Maybe I felt like I owed it to Leiden because he took me in. I've been in this game for almost four years, I was here when he first conceived the rebellion. But something has changed. I don't know what but something has I just know it. But I know I used to have pride, but now I just have regrets."

"Nikolai," she began, passing him back the bottle which he thirsty chugged on as he was desperate to feel something but the apathy and grief that consumed him, "everybody grows. Sometimes we grow together, sometimes we grow apart. But everybody grows. The rebellion rescued me my home life it...it was dysfunctional is the polite word. I owe them my life. But if you've believed you've repaid your debt and there is no place left in her heart left for the cause then I'm not going to stop you leaving."

Demonic screams punctured the air.

They are simply megalomaniacal sadists looking for excuses to justify their mindless self indulgences. That was all Nikolai saw the rebellion as, as evil as the evil they claimed to fight. The ultimate hypocrites.

"I forget, you wanted to ask me something about running. Is it running away, is that what you want?".

"I don't know what I want anymore."

He sighed heavily, shoving the bottle into her hands.

"You know..." he began, speaking with hesitancy, "you know you were raped by a demon?".

"SIN, yes," she answered in between sips on the bottle, speaking matter of factly-as if her emotions had shutdown as soon as she heard the word 'rape'.

"What do you think drove him to do such a bad thing? Did he have good reasons, was it your blood that drove him to do it. I only ask because the rebels are growing feral now they've drunk demon body. They've turned into rabid, bloodthirsty beasts."

"I think it was the blood. When he would come down from the blood he seemed ashamed to even look at me. He always offer me a line of his coke, like he wanted me to get high so at least he could say he done one nice thing. Even if that wasn't enough."

"So yes, I think he regretted it when he sobered up."

"And maybe that doesn't make him a monster. Just a victim of his addiction just as much as I was a victim of his."

"Now my head is starting to swim a bit I won't remember asking you this, or whatever your answer is, can I ask you one question?" she asked.

"Sure."

"What's under those bandages, for real?".

"I..." he sighed heavily, the truth weighing down on his conscience, "I cut the word evil monster into my arm. Because I'm an evil monster. And I just needed feel pain because I'm so cold and dead inside. I see what you get out of cutting now."

"Oh honey no you didn't..." Halone whined, her forehead wrinkling with fear.

He pulled up the sleeve of his black hoodie and unwrapped the bandages, showing her the scabbed over cuts, "you did..." she uttered with sadness.

"Thats why I'm wearing long sleeves, to hide it. And blood doesn't show up on black."

"For what it's worth you're not dead inside. You're a beautiful soul, and I don't know what I'd do without you," she said, she threw her arms around Nikolai and hugged him, careful to avoid his cuts as she knew how painful it was with fresh cuts.

"Don't worry I went shallow with the blade, I don't want to die I just...I just wanted to feel some control because I've never felt more out of control. Everyday I feel like I'm sinking. Lower and lower. Lower than I ever thought possible. When I see the blood it feels right. I deserve to bleed. But I won't kill myself. I don't deserve the easy way out."

"I tried to kill my self. More than once. A lot more than once. But I'm glad I didn't. And I'm not going to tell you not to kill yourself. All I'm gonna say is give things time. If you're at a rock bottom the only place to go from there is up. Everything ends. Sadness ends. Happiness ends. Rinse and repeat, and that's basically life. Right now you're feeling lost and without purpose but I promise you chances are you'll find it when you least expected. So stay alive for now, just it time. That's all I'm asking."

"Those are some wise words."

"And, for now, lay off the booze. It won't help. Fun turns to hell pretty damn quickly."

"Halone?" he asked, his voice as timid as a lost little boy. And it broke her heart in bloody pieces of shrapnel.

"Yes?".

"I...I need you in my life. You remind me of my ex. And I loved her, as much as I can love anybody. Most of the time I feel doomed but with you...I don't."

"Somehow you maned to make things make sense, you calm the waters that try to drown me everyday."

"For what it's worth I always liked you, for more than just your fit body, although that's always a bonus."

"But, to be serious...and from the bottom of my heart, I need you too. Probably more than you know. I think...I think it goes unsaid but...you know."

"I know."

She snuggled up against the warmth of his chest, letting her eyes close as their heads fogged over with a fuzzy, buzzing, warm glow of the half a bottle of vodka each. It set them free from their pain, and in this moment, together, they were radiantly numb.