━━━ ꧁ད ✶ ཌ꧂ ━━━

CHAPTER 21

━━━ ꧁ད ✶ ཌ꧂ ━━━

I once heard that we could have someone similar to us living on the same planet. A twin who didn't share any kind of blood connection. I did not know everything that entailed, and still, I believed in that slim possibility, but not until this point.

"She looks a lot like me," I whispered, afraid that Reidar might come out of some container again.

"I understand it wasn't easy to explain. When I saw you for the first time, I was surprised. The resemblance is striking; outwardly, you're unrecognizable. However, what convinced me was your character. I wanted to show you the portrait, but then Reidar appeared, and you know the rest of the story. Having you with so many unknowns wasn't intentional."

"You've already apologized several times," I interjected before he could apologize again. "I understand. If you hadn't shown it to me, I wouldn't have believed you either."

"So, are we good?" He didn't sound sure when he asked.

I didn't fully trust him, but having him with me was better than nothing. "What do you prefer: a dark room alone, or the same place, but with someone keeping you company?" I asked.

"Company. Yours." He replied without hesitation, and his smile sent a tingle through my stomach. It was magnetic. The glow of the medallion still revealed more of his fascinating gestures to me, and it also tempted me to keep looking at him for a long time.

"Isn't it supposed to turn off at some point?" I raised the medallion. "It draws a lot of attention."

"I don't know why it does that."

I turned on my heels and cleaned a bit more of the container.

Incredible, but true. There she was, my lookalike, with her arms raised, wearing a red dress that exuded grace and confidence. At the same time, she held a rope in one hand, the same one that extended horizontally through the container. With the other hand, she raised a red umbrella adorned with lace and small white freckles, over which rained the letters of a possible name. I tried to clean that area, but a layer of dirt resisted.

"What was she?" I couldn't help but ask.

"A trapeze artist. Of the three, the most adored and spoiled."

Reidar, the shadow, and now her. Trapeze artists seemed to be at the center of this story. Even Thomas, in his narration, mentioned that the first death was that of one of those three.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

"Thomas told me what he had discovered about the incident at the circus. He said the owner died in the costume tent, burned to ashes, and that over the course of the days, during each performance, the lights kept going out, sending someone new to death. First, it was a trapeze artist." I closed my mouth when he snapped his fingers.

Looking at him, he seemed stunned.

I had forgotten that Ashton had no memories of his death, except for a trunk and Reidar.

"I didn't remember what happened to me, and I don't know what happened to the others either. But it seemed too exaggerated, my reaction to being locked up..."

"What do you mean?"

"The basement chest. I just remembered it."

"I still don't understand."

"Listen. Shortly before my death, I was inside a trunk."

"What were you doing there?"

He stopped smiling.

"I don't know. But then there's this other fleeting memory that I already had, in which I was wearing different clothes from the ones I'm wearing now." He suddenly regained his enthusiasm. "You see, I've dressed like this since I woke up as a ghost, so it must have happened a few days before."

"Are you saying something happened before your death?"

He nodded.

"Through a poorly closed curtain, I saw my father give a medallion to someone."

"And who did he give it to?"

He took off his hat and held it by the crown, then made it float over his palm. The object spun a couple of times and disappeared into the air. I stared at his hand, fascinated by what I had just witnessed until he spoke again.

"He gave it to Reidar."

The dirt on the portrait came loose and fell at my feet.

"Sirius," I read, the letters dancing on the umbrella. The music box was his.

"That was his stage name. The real one was Ellinor."

"Should we go inside to see if we find the medallion?" I suggested, but his thick eyebrows, now forming a V shape, highlighted a wrinkle on his forehead.

"Reidar could be in any of the containers. We can't act blindly."

I shifted my weight to one leg.

"But you're here. And in terms and conditions, I believe you can do more than him. Reidar limps. Did you ever go in to check on the place?" I surprised myself with the courage that seemed to have emerged from an unrecognizable place inside me.

"He's not hiding anything."

"Not at first glance," I interjected. "I bet there are boxes and crates, specifically ones you can't search. And tell me, Ashton, did you make sure of every detail?"

His jaw tensed, revealing a look of frustration on his face. It was the kind of reaction that could be hidden in the dark, but now that I could see him quite clearly, it was easier for me to respond to him.

But instead of speaking, he took a step towards me, and then another.

His shoulders were tense, and his gaze was shadowed. He also had curled eyelashes, but still, he was intimidating and handsome. I hadn't been mistaken about that.

"Although I have so many limitations compared to your world, I can do something, and it's very important. At least, it is for me."

"What are you talking about?" I stammered. What could be so crucial?

"I protect you. But right now, I get the feeling you want to make things difficult." Another step forward.

I couldn't help but step back. Not when he was looking at me in a way that disturbed my mind and my heart.

It seemed that seeing his face also had its downsides. If he insisted, he could make me nervous.

My heel tripped over a rail, and my arms extended, but the weight of my back eventually pushed me backward.

I imagined the pain I would experience from hitting the container. But the electricity that crawled from my waist to my neck numbed my back, and then I couldn't move anymore.

My feet were stuck to the ground, but as if someone had pressed the pause button, the rest of my body remained still and in an uncomfortable position. Besides, I found it impossible to breathe. Something obstructed my lungs, preventing me from taking in air.

After a few seconds, my torso began to rise in slow motion. The obstruction disappeared, but another force pushed me forward, and Ashton crossed my path just in time, catching me in his arms.

"Calm down," he hurried. "It's normal. You'll start feeling again shortly."

I felt the pressure of his fingers on my back like a gentle caress. He was motivating my body to function normally again. Everything below my waist still felt numb.

"What just happened?" I gasped.

"What I can do, including turning off the lights, is thanks to this medallion. But since it's far from the other two, it causes accidents, like a bulb exploding when I try to turn it off, or what just happened with your body right now.

He stopped his caresses and held my gaze as if he wanted to convey something through his eyes. Then, his hand moved again on my back with renewed intensity.

"There was a moment when you stopped breathing. I mean, with the medallions together, everything balances well. And this specific one, the one from the sealed circus, allows manipulation of any type of matter, be it objects or living bodies. It even allows lifting them, regardless of their size. What it does is nullify the weight of the matter. The same thing happened with your body, but since it doesn't work well because of the distance from the other two, it's evident that no living being can survive if I lift it for too long. Everything in life must have a balance; the three medallions maintained it when they were together, and therefore, they cannot be used separately."

"That's why you thought everything could return to normal if the three of them came back together."

"Yes."

"It seems like a tasteless joke," I thought out loud.

"The fact that I belong to a circus doesn't mean I'm a joker. Just as my death doesn't define everything in me either," he said. He took my hand and pressed the tips of my fingers, sending tingles through me. He seemed to be examining every detail. "I can feel it, and it's thanks to you, Zara. I don't want to lose that."

The surrounding air became filled with palpable tension as our gazes met. I felt a shiver run down my spine, and a mix of cold and warmth invaded my body. I didn't know how to react to his caresses, and the closeness between us only complicated the situation further. I was caught in a whirlwind of conflicting emotions.

"You need to understand that not everything revolves around the circus. It's not just him and his consequences that keep me here. You and your humanity keep me in check, or, who knows, I might as well become just another shadow and put an end to this never-ending nightmare. You need to look after yourself and your safety."

"What about you?" I asked. Without his help, I would have stayed at the fair, just like my family. I didn't know anything about shadows, but I knew that one could manifest as a flying nightmare. I didn't want to see him transform into that.

He lifted his head to inhale the fresh night air, and my eyes focused on the collar of his shirt. The pleasant smell of cinnamon was concentrated there. He was too close for me not to be aware of it.

"I need the one who can do this to me," he whispered against my cheek.

His fingers stopped squeezing mine and instead placed my hand over his heart, indirectly pressing my touch against his skin until I felt a thump. Out of nowhere.

"Impossible." I looked for his gaze.

Like a clock whose hand was stuck, forcing it to remain jammed and always point in the same direction. That's how I thought his heart was.

Dazed and fascinated, I made an effort to feel it again. But it was taking its time to give its long-awaited sign of life.

I had never focused so much on something. It amazed me in very strange ways.

I felt another thump after five seconds. Then I had to wait another seven. It didn't follow a uniform rhythm, which reminded me of the music box with its stuck gears.

It was absolutely real. His heart beat as if it were alive, or fighting to be.

"I thought something like this was..."

"Impossible?" He pressed his forehead against mine, stealing my breath without needing to use magic this time. When he sighed, it tickled the tip of my nose. He didn't notice, as he kept his eyes closed. He seemed exhausted. "You need to understand how important this is to me."

I felt anxious as I gazed at his mouth, which had a peculiarly lifeless hue. He was so close.

"It's beating..." I said it in a hushed voice. Then his eyelids flicked open.

"Yes. Dead, but also alive in some way," he mocked bitterly.

His forehead pulled away from mine urgently, but he didn't move completely, because I didn't even know if my body had returned to normal functioning.

"Despite this, I'm not like a human. Not anymore. And there's not much I can do in this form, starting with you."

He was hiding something again. It was evident enough to betray him.

He was angry, but not with me, but rather with what he had become.

I felt the same way because he stood in front of me, wanting to do something about the situation and existing in his way.

Ashton wanted to be capable, but he envied life for the great gift it granted—the simple sensation of touch, which was so important to him.

However, I wasn't the one who needed to understand.

I took him by the cheeks, and his eyes returned to me.

Ashton possessed a certain modesty. He could have died, but he kept trying, even with more strength than many people could have.

I wanted to tell him not to underestimate himself that way, but I couldn't bring myself to open my lips. I was never good with words, and admitting that felt awful.

He smiled, but the spark didn't reach his eyes. It was a sad smile, and his fingers gently caressed my cheek. Suddenly, he had forgotten about the numbness in my back.

"You're crying again," he said. "You only do it when you feel overwhelmed."

I shook my head. If I did cry this time, it was out of anger and helplessness.

"Stop hating yourself," I raised my voice more than necessary. "You're stronger than any living being because, despite being dead, you keep fighting. You won't turn into a shadow. We can handle all this together," I finished in a whisper because his mouth had suddenly come too close to mine.

I stood as still as a tree trunk. He must have taken my words the wrong way, but in an instant, his gaze shifted to the void, and he stepped away, leaving me wobbly on the ground like a drifting leaf.

Or maybe I misinterpreted his actions.

A buzzing, accompanied by an annoying screech, forced me to cover my ears. I had to wait for about a minute until it stopped, and then I removed my hands and returned to my senses.

Ashton was staring at the train's cabin, where the controls to drive it were. Above, the chimney emitted a cloud of black smoke.

Someone was trying to set it in motion, and it wasn't a good idea. It was clear they hadn't used it in a long time.

"We should get on," I suggested, and Ashton looked at me angrily, as if everything we had just said to each other had meant nothing to me. "Who in their right mind would try to start something that has practically been stuck for so many years?"

He thought about it for a moment.

"It's impossible in the state it's in," he reasoned.

"Unless they have a medallion," I speculated, but Ashton didn't take my comment into account, as he was now examining the sky.

"Unless their idea is to use it to send a signal," he claimed as if he had found what he was looking for.

I imitated him, but all I saw in the night sky were clouds.

I strained my eyes a bit more, and then I saw them approaching as if they were drawn to the train.

"Those... Those are..."

"The shadow returned accompanied".

My face twisted in horror.

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