Dying wasn't so hard.

It was waking up from it that was confusing.

I was once again 18 years old.

My palace was as forgotten and isolated as it had been then. The few servants that served me did a half job as they knew they would not be punished for it. The stench of unclean bed linens filled my nose as I shifted in my bed and pushed up. The sun peaked through the drawn curtains, that held streaks of dust along them. The room of a eighteen year old princess was exactly like this.

A wave of dizziness overwhelmed me, and I lifted a hand to my forehead to feel something pressed against it. Confused, I pulled a short blue ribbon from it to find it was a cooling spell woven in it.

The door opened abruptly revealing a servant girl, who appeared about two years younger than me. Her red curly hair was pulled back inn stiff coronet braid. Her servants uniform denoted her as someone who did laundry commonly.

She stiffened when her brown eyes fell on me. "Y-Your majesty?!"

Rushing over, she placed the trey on the side table and worriedly pressed her hands against my forehead. After a minute she released a sigh of relief, "I'm so relieved. I thought you were really a goner, ah."

Pulling her hand away she used the same hand to cover her mouth in a flustered manner. "I'm sorry, your majesty. I—."

I looked away from her to the door. "Are you the only person who's attending me?"

Despite my throat being dry I forced myself to speak around the pain. Catching one, she grabbed the glass of water and held it out to me.

Taking it, I swallowed luxuriating in it's sweet taste and cool touch. Apart of me couldn't help feeling wonder at my appreciation of having clean water to drink. In the dungeon I'd learned everything about hunger and thirst.

"Y-yes, my name is Scarlette and usually I'm below stairs, but the others were busy, and I was the only one able to stay with Princess for two nights," she said taking the cup from me.

"Busy?"

I looked around the room and felt the corner of my lips lift in amusement. "Scarlette, bring me a mirror."

Unsurprised by my request, she pulled one from the pocket of her apron and held it in front of me. My brown skin was blotchy, and uneven while my hair was stringy and cracked blonde. I looked sickly, not only because of being ill but because of my foolish attempts at the time to look as the others did with pale skin, and blonde hair. Like the others of Liona heritage. I'd been desperate to prove that I belonged to the royal family.

I'd even copied the favored princess style of pastel pinks, soft blues, and easter yellow color scheme. Weakly I reached out and drew a hand down my reflection.

"So, stupid."

"Princess?"

I had been given a second chance. Whether it was a blessing or curse, I'd already decided that I wouldn't live like an idiot any more hoping for scraps of affection from those who don't want me.

"In my dresser, in the bottom drawer there are two potion bottles. Take the one that is blue, and make me bath with it," I ordered focusing on Scarlette.

Swiftly, Scarlette put the mirror back in her pocket and went to start my bath.

Getting up, I enjoyed that my limbs weren't too weak, but I still had to take it slow. Walking over to the vanity, I pulled out sealed letters. One after another, I laid them atop the table. Counting each one until I reached the last one at twelve.

"Princess, the bath is ready," Scarlette coming to my side with a tower thrown over her arm.

"Okay."

Taking her hand, I let her escort to bathtub I walked into the bathroom an spotted a few of the stains but I decided to hold my tongue. She helped me remove my clothing, and put me into the tub.

I leaned my head back and pressed my lips together against the stinging sensation that started from my toes up.

When I was fifteen I'd foolishly overhead some women talking about a skin lightening potion and eager to fit in bought it from some unknown scam wizard. I forced myself to bathe in his solution night after night. Bearing the pain in hopes that I was rise from the poisoned waters changed and beautiful.

Instead, I'd scarred my skin, damaged the smoothness and could really be out in the sun again. Even though I'd bought a potion to reverse the effects, I never used it.

"S-scarlette?"

Scarlette, who'd been sitting just outside the bathroom, immediately entered at my call. "Yes, Princess?"

"Get me a pair of scissors."

"P-Princess, scissors?"

"Yes, scissors."

There was only silence after my confirmation, so I assumed she'd gone to get them. Taking a deep breath, I plunged under the hot bath water and clasped my head trying to drown out some the memories that were trying to surge back up.

The cruel guards men.

My relatives from Nycturnia in chains, my great-grand fathers head on a spike.

Being dragged from the ballroom after being accused of poisoning my sister.

The sensation of my heart breaking as I watched my husband embrace another woman.

The look of disgust on my fathers face.

Like broken puzzle pieces that fell, making me want to scream at the injustice of it all.

With a gasp I broke the surface and frantically slapped around before my hand landed on the edge of the bath. Breathing harshly, I stared at the water's surface that still rippled from my frantic attempt to fly form the bathtub.

"Princess," Scarlette called in alarm running over to me.

"I'm okay."

I didn't know if I was trying to comfort her or myself.

"Princess, do you want to try to get one of the physicians again," Scarlette knelt beside the bath time. The look of worry on her pale features surprised me. Originally, I don't think I ever had a run in with this maid, but she'd managed to show more care for me than anyone in life had before I'd died at 27 years old.

I slowly shook my head, "There is no need, just help me get up."

I'd used most of my strength up, and couldn't seem to regain enough to get out of the bathtub.

She helped me out, and settled me back in my room before the vanity. As she lifted the towel to help dry my hair I stopped her.

"Hand me the scissors."

She eyed me in the mirror, and I could see her mind turning over my requests but eventually she placed them in my hand. The weight brought me comfort, the gleaming edge harsh in the light that filtered through the uncovered windows.

Sitting up, I stared at myself for a long minute. Taking in my sickly pallor a lot more improved since I'd taken the first antidote. I would have to take it a few more times to get my skin back to its original deep mahogany look. My eyes were still deep set, and my damaged hair hung limp and dead on my shoulders.

Spiritless, like me.

"Princess?"

I smiled.

And allowed my hate to rise and grabbing a piece of my hair I cut it.

"Princess!" Alarmed Scarlette rushed forward.

"Stay!"

I barked at my order as I ruthlessly cut my off piece by piece. In east it was believed that you're body belonged to your parents, and it was great disrespect to cut or harm oneself. In some places cutting hair was seen as cutting ties.

With every piece of hair that fell to the ground I was cutting ties with my past self. Carving out, that young girl who craved love and desired acknowledgement.

The sound of my heavy breathing and the sniping of scissors was the only sound and soon I was staring at my freshly cut hair that reached the top of my ears.

Exhaling, I smiled as I stared at myself. "I feel lighter."

Half-turning I set the scissors into the shocked Scarlette's hands. "Take the hair, and these letters and toss them into the fire. Stay until every singly trace of them are burned to ashes."

This was a new beginning.

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