noah

I slammed my stack of untouched (well now they were touched but it was the first time today) stack of textbooks down onto my desk and switched on my light. The sky was already darkening and it was Saturday- meaning that as long as I focused tonight I would have Sunday free tomorrow. Maybe me and my friend Jason could go out to a cafe or we could just hang around a park in the city. Or something. 

My dad poked his head in. "Starting your studying now?"

"Uh, yeah. If you want me to do the dishes I'll do them afterwards."

He nodded. "I was going to ask you if you wanted to go out tonight to go for a night walk? I was cleaning the garden all day and I need to stretch my legs."

"Uh..." Crap. I valued the time I spent with my parents, I really did. Ever since my mother had gotten sick, I'd noticed the fact that my time with them was, in fact, limited, and that I should be around with them more often. Even when she had gotten better, I didn't stop thinking about it.

"Um... for fifteen minutes? A jog around the block?"

My dad raised his eyebrow. "That seems rather short. And I'm not jogging, I'm too old for that. I'm fifty-two."

"That's young." I roll my eyes. "Fine, thirty minutes."

"How much studying do you have to do?"

This was a question I would've liked to have not answered. He didn't need to know that I hadn't done any homework at all today. 

"Not too much." I knew that I could finish it quickly if I focused, but it was really hard to, considering the fact that there was a whole lot of other stuff I could be doing.

My dad disappeared, yelling a second later, "I'll give you a minute to get ready!"

I wasn't bothered to change; we would be walking in the dark, so I just shoved my feet into shoes and pulled the door open. 

*

Dawn

When I opened my eyes, the first thought that came into my mind was that I'd be going to dad's. The second was that since I was going to his place, there wouldn't be a lot of time to spend at the library. 

"Dawn! You have to go to Dad's at nine because I've got to go shopping and I don't like doing shopping after twelve because there's always so many people and so little car spaces-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." I yawned, stretching. The morning light was already shining brightly into my room; I liked the blinds up because it made the start of the day more... happier I guess?
I smiled at my own silly thoughts, stumbling out of bed.

After I'd put on a t-shirt, cardigan, and a small skirt, brushed my hair and left it out, I padded down the stairs to meet a very rushed mum dashing around. "Where are my keys?" She barely paused for breath as she continued, "And have breakfast now because you've got fifteen minutes to get ready for dad's."

"Okay, okay," I mumbled.

"What?"

"Never mind." I shuffled towards the kitchen, heading for the fridge. As I poured out milk, I suddenly remembered that I had to remember my library books. Groaning, I abandoned my breakfast and rushed upstairs. 

My room at my mum's place was small, but neat. Study books in drawers, desk almost bare save for a small white lamp, pencils lined up, clothes neatly stacked. Bed covers made. 

This was why it was easy to locate the neat pile of library books on the floor next to my desk, with the library bag hanging on the door knob. I began shoving the books in, flicking my eyes over the covers. I'd read them all in three days, but that didn't mean I disliked them. On the contrary, they were rather good, with the exception of the science handbook my mum had forced me to borrow. I'd read five pages and given up. 

Dumping the bulging back onto my bed, I tumbled downstairs again and shoved the rest of my breakfast into my waiting stomach. 

*

It was only when I was halfway to dad's place when I realised I'd left my library books on my bed, packed but forgotten in the haste to get into the car.

"Crap." I grimaced, and turned around in my seat to check the backseats. Empty.

"You have to turn around," I announced, not daring to glance at Mum.

"Why?" She glanced out the window, then at the crawling traffic. "You're almost at dad's. We can't turn back now." A red car pushed in front of our small white Mazda and my mum blew the horn at the car for forgetting to put on the indicator. 

"My library books," I groaned. "I left them on my bed."

My mum sighed. "I'm not going back for them. When are they due?"

"Next week, but I finished them and-"

"Borrow more. I'll drop them off tomorrow or something."

"At the library?" I seriously doubted she'd go to dad's to drop off library books.

"Yes."

I stared out the window, silent for the rest of the ride, and wondering how wide the crack between my parents really was.

*

My room at my dad's place was a mess. Well, I suppose it was neat compared to my friends' ones but my study books were now scattered across the wooden desk and my pencil case spilling pens onto crumpled paper. Yawning, I trudged over to my little bookshelf and skimmed the covers. Adult fiction- my mum cared, dad didn't. I read a lot of... well let's just say more adult books at dad's place, classics at mum's.  

I sometimes wondered whether I had two personalities- one with a teenager's mood, which was shown at dad's, and the other a sweet, innocent sixteen-year-old at mum's.

There was nothing stuffed into the poor bookshelf that I hadn't already read. Frowning at the well-worn spines, I walked out of my bedroom and into the living room- dad's place was a one level, cozy house. "Dad," I said, glancing at the TV screen, where some football team was doing a group hug in a very... footballer-style way. 

He turned from his place on the couch. He looked fairly young for a dad, I supposed. "Do you have any spare books I could read?"

He sighed and switched off the TV, and checked the time. Half-past two. 

"D'you want to go to the library? I'll go buy some pizza for dinner while you're there." 

I nodded eagerly. "Of course!" 

Five minutes later we were walking towards the library. It was such a nice day- the birds were tweeting, the sky a deep, strong blue. 

"Where's your library bag?" Dad was very observant- I'd found this out when I'd tried to hide my chocolate bars from Aria and he'd spotted them almost instantly. Luckily he didn't mind. 

"I, uh, left it at mum's." 

His relaxed expression became forced but other than that he didn't say anything. Just nodded. 

The big building came into view and my heart did a little happy dance. I could marry the library and be happy, I thought.

As I walked up the steps leading to the front entrance, Dad paused and stopped me. " I'll be in the shopping centre, okay? Call me if you need anything."

"I know." I was impatient to get my hands on some new reads. "Thanks."

He waved as he took the steps down two at a time and was soon gone.

*

After I'd selected about seven books and finished browsing, I staggered over to a spare seat and placed my books onto the floor next to it, slumping down into my seat. 

As I balanced the most interesting one on my lap, I turned my head and stared out the wide, tall windows. 

I looked down at the park right next door to the library. 

And I recognized two faces. From school.

Noah and Jason. 

Noah was leaning against the pole on the right of the swing, hands in pockets, hair ruffled from the light breeze that was blowing. He had a black t-shirt on that made me force my gaze away, and  jeans. His brown eyes, though such an ordinary colour, flashed in the sun and his mouth- well, I was going to stop right there.

He and Jason were talking about something or other, and the fact that if they just looked straight up they would be able to see me kind of freaked me out: I mean, here I was, the girl who'd been braver than them, reading library books, which honestly shouldn't have made me feel bad but it did. I quickly turned away, telling my eyes to read the words on the first page that for once didn't suck me in. I stared at it, the words swimming on the page, blurred and out of focus. I knew I looked like I was reading, but I was really going through what I had just seen in my head. 

I didn't even know why Noah had been on my mind lately. I mean, okay, maybe it was because he'd been shirtless the day when I'd met him on the edge of the cliff, but I was certainly annoyed that I kept on thinking about him randomly. It didn't make sense. 

WHY am I STILL thinking about him I swear I need a distraction right about now would be nice I bet I look like a person who cannot read what am I doing still staring at the first page for like two minutes I know I'm not a slow reader what is happening to me someone HELP-

"Dawn? Dawn!"

I jerked from my trance-like state, looking up from the page. 

Dad stood in front of me, holding the six books in his arms. "Time to go now," he said. "We've got pizza waiting for us."

"What- oh, right, yeah sure..." I stopped myself, quite certain that all that would end up coming from my traitorous mouth would be more idiotic nonsense. 

You idiot Dawn, all you saw were two people from your school, okay? And they didn't even see you! Stop acting like a madwoman and stay focused-

"You're doing it again, Dawn."

"Doing- wha-what?" Stupid stutter.

"Kind of... like... your eyes are glazing over and you look kind of panicked."

"I'm, uh, fine."

Fine. Really? 

If you were fine right now, Dawn, you would be happily gathering up your books instead of-

"You're doing it again."

"I'm fine, really. Let's go."

Before we left the library, however, I told Dad to put away four of the books I'd taken out. For some reason, I wasn't feeling as thirsty for books than I usually was.

As we walked out the sliding doors, I stared at the books tucked under my arm. The wind suddenly blew into my face in a strong gust, and I felt my hair flying back. I loved this feeling so much that I rolled up my cardigan sleeves.

I had a sudden urge to glance up.

I almost froze, but kept walking. 

Our eyes met for a second. 

Then Noah's arm brushed mine, and he was gone, walking the opposite direction to me. 

My arm felt tingly, and I tried not to think about what had just happened. That his skin had felt so warm against mine.

You goddamn idiot Dawn, why don't you just imagine stuffing his head down the toilet instead?  Surely that's disgusting enough that you'll stop thinking about him.

Unfortunately, that ended up with Dad wondering if he should book me in to see a doctor or something just in case I wasn't going crazy.