I yawned as I walked into the club room, after Kyoya and my date last night, I had been way to wired to sleep, Ranka had kept me up for at least another three hours, just talking about every little thing that Kyoya did, and then fangirling over it.

After that I was awake until three in the morning, just thinking and reading, so I was really tired today. "Hey Risa, are you okay?" I looked up and saw the twins standing in front of me.

"I'm fine, I just wasn't able to get much sleep last night. I'm just excited for the exposition to be over so we can go back to normal." School had been cancelled that afternoon, because of an exposition for cultural clubs that Ouran was hosting; there had been so much fuss and preparation that if I hadn't been exhausted by last night, the high energy atmosphere would do it.

"Weird, you and Kyoya are both acting really similarly, he is exhausted to, which isn't normal for him to show it this freely." Hikaru said thoughtfully, then they looked at each other and grinned, Kaoru turned to me and said, "Anything you want to tell us Risa?"

Because I was so tired, it took me a second to process what they were asking, but when it did, I slugged them in the shoulder and they both cringed, "You idiots, of course nothing like that happened, get your minds out of the gutter."

"Ah, really? Nothing happened?" They whined, obviously disappointed.

"No, now where's Haruhi, I wanted to talk to her."

Hikaru answered, "We sent her to go get coffee, we were out; she should be back soon!" We all turned as the door opened and there was two girls dressed in a fancy outfit that I identified as the Lobelia Girls Academy uniform.

The mandatory "Welcome" was said by all of the Hosts and Tamaki approached them, dressed in a full suit of armor, "Well, well, well. I see you ladies are from another school, I certainly hope we haven't startled you; we love first-time guests, I'm glad you've come, princesses. My darlings, even if the world were to be destroyed, I'd put my life on the line as your faithful knight and servant; I will protect you."

I groaned and rolled my eyes at the exceedingly cheesy line, and it appeared that the girls shared my sentiments, one of them said condescendingly, "Oh my, do you really think you'll be able to protect us? That's awfully arrogant of you, wouldn't you agree? You think that's what a woman wants to hear? Well you're wrong."

'Finally, someone with at least a bit of a brain on her shoulders.' I thought to myself.

The other one said, "Come on, give him a break, sister Suzuran. Men are just lowly life forms who don't care about anything other than perpetuating their testosterone latent image. By protecting us he's actually attempting to disguise the fact that he is weak and unable of even protecting himself."

'Maybe I spoke too soon' I groaned at the fact that these were a bunch of hard core feminists who believed that men were the lesser beings... Great.

Suzuran giggled, "You're such a clever girl, Hinagiku." I rolled my eyes again, I couldn't see this situation ending well.

Tamaki looked shocked that someone had turned him down so blatantly, "Don't you think that's a little harsh? Fine then, what do women like you want to hear?"

The door opened again dramatically and a woman with the flair of Tamaki burst in, swirling around a very confused Haruhi, "Maybe, something like "I would never leave my lover alone." If we fight, it'll be together. If we fail, we fail together. Even if I were to die, I promise you that I will never leave your side, my love." One of my eyebrows shot up as she bent to kiss Haruhi's hand and the other two girls acted like royalty had just walked into the room.

"Oh Benibara, we thought you'd never show!" Hinagiku said almost reverently.

Suzuran giggled flirtatiously, "What are we going to do with you? So, tell us where you found this lovely young lady."

Benibara hugged Haruhi close, "I just met her outside of the school. She may be dressed as a boy, but I knew the truth. She has such pretty maidenly eyes." They began stroking her skin and commenting on how soft her skin was and other stuff like that, while Haruhi just thanked them tersely.

I quickly walked over to save poor Haruhi who looked more uncomfortable by the second, before I could get there, Tamaki had tried to pull her out of their arms, but was just punched by Benibara, then he went back to the couch to sulk about how violent these girls were.

I cleared my throat and they turned to look at me, "If you would mind letting my friend go, she doesn't exactly seem pleased with you guys touching her."

Their eyes widened, "Don't tell me that these meatheads are holding you here too? This is a travesty!" Suzuran reached out to pull me into a hug, and the instant she grabbed me, my skin crawled. I may be comfortable with the Host club giving me friendly touches, but these girls gave off an aura that reminded me of my Father, which made my knees start to shake a little, and I jumped back.

She frowned and started to follow me, but my tall protector got in the way of her advancing, I look at Mori gratefully and took another step back to where Honey was waiting to pull me into a comforting hug; that didn't last long because Kyoya appeared and pulled me into his embrace, and Honey had to content himself with giving my hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Oh, come on Maiden, don't tell me that you'd rather be in the company of these boys, rather than be surrounded by maidens who treat you as an equal?"

I glared at her, "Who said that they treat me as anything less than an equal? I would recommend backing off before someone gets hurt, because these boys have been with me through worse situations than you could ever imagine!"

Kyoya jumped in before anything could get worse, "Those uniforms, I assume you are from Lobelia Girls academy?"

They nodded then went into an over dramatic introduction that involved pulling off their over clothes and showing very fancy costumes underneath and singing their name. Once they announced that they were the Zuka Club, the twins lost it.

"Oh man, what a stupid name. The Zuka club. My stomach hurts." Hikaru laughed, then Kaoru nodded and giggled as he chimed in, "The Zuka club, that's priceless; and they had those get-ups on under their uniforms." I smiled along with them, thinking about the costume situation, that must have been so uncomfortable wearing those clothes underneath their uniforms.

I jumped a bit in surprise and sighed as a huge motor started and Renge slowly rose from the floor, "You shouldn't underestimate the Zuka club, I may not know much about instant coffee, but I'm fascinated with girls' schools; St. Lobelia academy, it is truly a woman's world there. The Zuka club is a group of strong young maidens who consider women to be superior in every way. The club prides itself on its 30-year history, it's a society of maidens, by maidens, for maidens. The Zuka club activities include maidens' tea parties, the maiden debate forum, and most importantly, musical reviews performed by the society's top members."

'Wow, way to be a pamphlet, Renge...' I thought to myself dryly.

"You certainly have a vast world of knowledge, Renge." Kyoya complemented, and I looked up at him slyly, I could see that fake smile a light-year away.

"Well, I've always admired St, Lobelias, I just couldn't go to school there, though; what would I do without any boys?"

"Have some semblance of sanity." I muttered, and Kyoya squeezed me a little tighter.

The three Lobelia students then went into a speech that seemed rehearsed, Suzuran started, "A maiden's beauty; It means possessing a spirit pure enough to not give in to power or to lust."

Hinagiku continued, "As a girl, you... For a girl, you... We've had quite enough of all your oppressive male contempt for woman kind."

Benibara went on, "And our pride... comes from having meaningful relationships based on equality. Because with the same sex; and yes, that includes relationships of love."

The twins looked at the girls in boredom, "Whatever, we're so over it. Why don't you girls just scram." The Hosts then went into doing different activities, completely ignoring the Zuka Club

"I find it hard to believe that you silly boys have nothing to say about our sublime female love." Hinagiku looked ready to blow a gasket, but Suzuran laid a hand on her arm.

"You should feel sorry for them, Hinagiku, their patented host skills don't work on us; now they're all flustered and they don't know what to do with themselves."

I looked over Kyoya's shoulder as he wrote in his notebook, writing notes on this encounter and setting up a budget for the next month. I studiously tried to ignore the girls, but I was having a difficult time when Benibara said, "True. I must say I'm glad we decided to perform here, it was fun to sneak a peek at the notorious Ouran host club."

Honey looked up at Mori and me innocently, "Are we really notorious?" We nodded together and Mori said a quiet, "Yeah."

"And to think they're dragging these sweet young girls down with them. The host club's president may be a pretty little halfer, but he shouldn't be using his looks to create a fictitious romance. Attempting to fool the heart of a pure young maiden is demeaning, your so-called club activities are nothing more than debasing macho fantasies. I promise you, we will bring you guys down; the Ouran host club will be abolished."

By this point, I had had enough, I stood up and walked over to where these girls after Haruhi offered them coffee and they simpered away, being obnoxious.

"Okay, I have had enough, you guys are nothing more than self-centered jerks who have no idea what the real world is like. You think women are so much better than men? Well, I say that is stupid, you see, there are things men can do that women can't do as easily; it is our nature. That goes for men as well, there are things they can't do as easily as we can. We are EQUALS and need each other to have balance. And if you can't get that through your heads, then you are even more narrow minded than I thought you to be at first."

Benibara looked at me sympathetically, "Oh my poor dear, they have you even more brain washed than I had originally guessed, this requires immediate action to bring you to the truth. You see, it is not I who is the blind one, it is you."

I swelled up with rage, and I felt Honey restraining me from pouncing on these idiots and teaching them a lesson they wouldn't soon forget. "I'M ignorant? ME?" My voice was deadly quiet, "I have seen the horrors of this world first hand while you were sucking on your flipping silver spoon. Do you know what it feels like to lie beneath a man, and know that there is absolutely nothing you can do to stop him from doing what he wants, because he already beat you to the edge of unconsciousness? Do you know what is like to be starved for days simply because you weren't strong enough to get away? DO you know what it is like to be on the edge of giving up when you are rescued by the most wonderful people ever, knowing in that moment that they will never judge you for your past but will love you unconditionally?"

"I highly doubt you do, but if you continue to insult the best people I know, I will make sure that you see how truly powerless you are. Am I understood?" Everyone was looking at me in shock, so I whirled to the door and ran out, wanting nothing more than to be alone.

***

I found myself in the rose maze after several hours, thinking about everything that just happened and after I had finally calmed down, I felt a little embarrassed for my outburst.

"I thought I might find you in here." I turned around slowly, expecting Kyoya to be there, but instead it was Mori. He sat next to me on the bench I was on and we sat for a while in silence. I appreciated his willingness to let me keep to my thoughts, we were both more than willing to enjoy the silence.

After a few minutes had passed he asked while still looking at the sky, "Are you okay Risa? I sounded like you have a lot of pent up emotion that has building up for some time."

I shook my head, "I thought I was all good, but I guess not. So much has been happening lately, and I haven't been sleeping well. I guess that this is just a reflection of how well my brain is functioning right now."

He nodded but stayed quiet, obviously waiting for me to elaborate, "I've been having nightmares lately about my Father, that isn't surprising I guess, but it's been made worse by the fact that I like Kyoya so much. I mean, consciously, I know that Kyoya is not my Father, but underneath, I can't shake the feeling that he will hurt me someday. I want to be normal, and feel normal, but that isn't how things are working out." My head and shoulders drooped, and I felt Mori's arms encircling me.

"Being afraid is normal after what you went through, but please know that you don't have to go through this on your own. We are all here, and we want you to be happy, so you can tell us things; especially Kyoya, he wants to know. I don't think I've ever seen him act like this, so caring and almost genuinely happy."

I looked at him and smiled, returning the hug, "That was what I needed to hear Takashi, thank you."

He nodded and stood up, saying just before he left, "Tamaki wants to talk to you. Haruhi's mad and he has an idea to fix that." I groaned then headed back to the club room where Tamaki and Kyoya were the only ones waiting for me.

"Risa, you have to help us! Haruhi hates us and will leave us forever, so we need to do something to realize that this is where she belongs!" Tamaki almost sobbed at me.

"You do realize that she isn't going to leave, right?" He ignored me and launched into this elaborate plan of dressing up as girls and bringing her back to him using the lure of sisters to entice her.

I snorted as he went his reasoning behind this plot, then he finally got to his point, "Risa, your job is perhaps the most critical, you have to convince Kyoya to help us, he is being stubborn."

I sighed and turned to my boyfriend, "What do you want?"

He cocked an eyebrow, "Excuse me?"

"What do you want from me to go through with Tamaki's harebrained scheme? I know that most things have a price for you, so what is it?"

The slight scowl that had been on his face the entire time turned into a smirk, "You would do anything I asked?"

I frowned, knowing that this was a minefield that could easily blow up in my face, "Anything within reason and there would be an absolute time limit of a week."

"Very well, I'll do it, may I offer you a ride home Risa?"

Tamaki cheered, but I held up my hand, "Hold up Kyoya, what is it you want?"

"You'll see sweetheart, now come along."

"I'm actually going to the office tonight, I have a lesson with one of your Father's advisors."

He nodded and we walked out, hand in hand.

***

I had never laughed so hard in my life, seeing the Hosts dressed up in full drag was absolutely priceless. I had snuck out my camera and captured a few shots of this rare occasion, which none of the Hosts were happy about.

The night before I had asked Ranka for any tips he might have about dressing in drag and I had gotten another several hour long conversation, so I was the Hosts advisor in all of this. Finally, I heard Haruhi and the Lobelia girls outside so I hissed for the boys to get in position then I cut the lights. The doors opened and the boys all sang "Ouran!" as best they could, with few exceptions, it was very off tune.

"Oh, Haruhi, welcome back!" Tamaki said happily, then Honey ran up to her.

"Look Haru-chan, I'm a princess now! Aren't I cute?"

Benibara looked at me nervously, then she exclaimed, "What is the meaning of this? Are you trying to make fun of woman-kind?"

Tamaki happily said with his usual flair, "What? No, that's not it at all, everything's going according to plan; our strategy is guaranteed to make even a crying child smile. It's the freebie campaign! My dears, you ladies have all lived sheltered lives at Lobelia, so you might not know, that commoners are weak; they have a weakness for free things. Haruhi, you may be distracted by the Zuka club, but choose us, and you gain not only a host club full of brothers but sisters as well. See, this way, you can experience feminine bonding while staying in the host club; isn't that a great idea? Aren't I pretty?"

I started giggled again as I made eye contact with Kyoya, who looked absolutely embarrassed. I knew that I should probably watch out because I owned him a favor, but this was too good to miss!

The twins and Honey gathered around Haruhi and began to ask her who was prettiest and other things. Benibara was disgusted, and she said it, but then Haruhi burst into laughter and crawled across the room with them chasing her, which only caused her to laugh harder. "This is too much. I don't even get what you're trying to do, I knew you were a bunch of goofballs, but geez..." After them chasing her for a little bit longer she eventually calmed down a little, "Come on, cut it out. What were you thinking? What's gotten into you guys?"

That made the mood a bit more solemn and Hikaru answered, "We did this because we don't want you to leave the host club, Haruhi." She looked at him in surprise, then Benibara asked her, obviously having given up on me, "Well maiden, have you made your choice?"

Haruhi smiled, "Yeah, I have. I'm sorry but your club's not for me, I think the idea of a girls' school is great, and your views are very unique and interesting; but I came to this school with a goal and a plan for my future. So, while I appreciate your offer, I really already knew that I was never going to leave Ouran academy."

Tamaki looked as though someone had just shot him, "Haruhi, hold on, if you knew you weren't going to leave, then why did you act so angry yesterday?"

She immediately got irritated, "How would you feel if I stole something of yours without asking you? I really liked that mechanical pencil, it was easy to write with."

I gave Kyoya a WTF look, obviously I had missed something, but Haruhi answered for him, obviously seeing my look, "These guys sold my pencil online without asking."

I nodded, "Oh yeah, they tried to do that to something of mine, but I threatened to sell Kyoya's notebook on that site if they tried anything, and ever since then they haven't touched my stuff."

She nodded and told Tamaki that she still didn't want the pencil he had offered. Benibara was about to leave before she shot in one more thing, "We're not going to give up on you, maiden, I swear this to you. Someday, we'll come and rescue you from this place, and when we do, we'll abolish the Ouran host club. Well, adieu."

Renge then popped up and made a dramatic finish to the chapter, "And so, a new rival, the Zuka club has appeared. From this point on, the story's gonna get even more exciting. What's gonna happen to our beloved host club boys next? Hang in there, host club, don't give up, boys."

I shook my head and yelled at Renge, "You know that the fourth wall is still supposed to be intact." She looked at me mischievously and winked at the reader, "Renge, stop that!" I shouted

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A/N Finally done! I have been looking forward to this episode for a while and I had fun with it! What did you guys think?