Anime_Kitty - Paint Me a Murder

Title - 5/5

I really like your title. You used "Paint" as wordplay because the MC is an artist, and "Murder" goes with the genre, of course. When I searched it up, there weren't any other books with the same title. Good job!

Description/Blurb - 7/10

What's in your description is good, but it could use some slight improvements. Why is Kazimere traveling down Hell's Hollow? You mention that it's dangerous and he uncovers secrets, but you don't really go into why he's traveling down there. There's a line that mentions his addiction, but you don't go any further. If you add a paragraph above the first one about Kazimere's life before Hell's Hollow, his addiction and a slight backstory, it will help readers understand the description more and connect to him more.

This is a small thing, but the wording in the first sentence is a bit weird. I'd reword it a bit differently, like this: "A young artist, Kazimere, ventures down the murderous depths of Hell's Hollow for an antidote to alleviate his addiction, only to encounter death along the way." You don't have to change it to my suggestion, but it sums up things a bit and fixes the awkward phrases.

Why do you have a bigger description inside? Some people restate their description in an author's note in the beginning, but you shouldn't provide more information inside the book. Any and all information about the description needs to be in the actual description, not inside your book. Readers may not be interested to read a bigger description; they should get the whole description all at once.

The bigger description has a new paragraph in the beginning, which can easily be added to the beginning of the actual description. I still recommend adding information about Kazimere, but you don't have to add as much information (just a sentence or two).

Cover - 4.5/5

I really like the vibe your cover gives. The picture of the skull and flowers goes together really well with the font of the title. The only reason I took off half of a point was because of the title. While the large title is very easy to see, it makes your cover seem a little too busy. I suggest making the title a bit smaller and placing the words on different lines, with "Paint" on the first line, "Me a" on the second line, and "Murder" on the last line.

I didn't take off for this, but I was expecting your cover to reflect the title, like having your title painted in blood or something; that's just a possible new cover you can consider for the future.

Plot - 17/20

This isn't the first mystery/thriller I've read that's more about gangs than the mystery of it all, but it was really interesting nonetheless. The mystery seemed to be more about Hank's murder than anything, which didn't play a big part in the first five chapters, but I could tell that it was going to make a bigger deal later on.

There weren't really any plot holes, but I did have a minor issue. It takes a few chapters for you to mention that Kazimere is new to town, but it's hinted a few times before that. However, the first chapter and the description made me believe that he wasn't new to town because there's no mention of it, and he already has a routine of painting and buying drugs, not to mention how close he is with his new friends. I suggest stating that he's new to town in the first chapter to avoid confusion for future readers.

The plot progression was fine, and I felt that the first five chapters contributed to the plot. You need to work on your scene transitions because it wasn't always clear at times, but besides that, you did a pretty good job overall.

Characterization - 18/20

All of the characters seemed realistic, especially Kazimere with his cocaine addiction. I was a bit concerned in the beginning that the sole focus would be on Kazimere, not any of the other characters, but I was wrong. You did a pretty good job at revealing the personalities of the other characters.

My biggest issue was that you didn't describe any of your characters. Having a cast is supposed to make visualization easier for your readers, not to take the place of descriptions. If you are going to have a cast, you still need to describe your characters in the story. I couldn't really picture what they looked like in my head because I didn't have those descriptions. You described everything else, so it surprised me when you didn't describe your characters. You need to go back and describe them when they are first introduced.

Creativity/Originality - 10/10

As I've said before, I've read stories that center around gangs and their violence, but this is the first time I've ever been in the POV of an outsider before. It's interesting to see Kazimere's reactions to everything because he hasn't lived there for very long, so he doesn't know much about the gangs.

Spelling & Grammar - 12/15

For the most part, your grammar and spelling were good. I never had an issue understanding anything, but I caught some spelling errors and punctuation mistakes in every chapter that I read (the first five). Quite a few of them were caught by other reviewers though, so it won't take much editing to fix them.

Enjoyability - 4/5

I prefer more mystery/thrillers that aren't really about gangs, but that's just my personal opinion. Reading about gangs doesn't interest me much. However, your story was really captivating and interesting. I doubt I'll read more in the future, but I was really impressed with what I read. Good job!

Literary Devices - 5/5

You did a really good job with this. Every simile and metaphor helped convey the message and tone you were striving for.

Descriptions - 4/5

While your descriptions are nice, they're a little too much at times. In the beginning, you tended to beat around the bush instead of saying what was really happening because of your poetic descriptions. As nice as they are, using direct phrases and sentences seems better and more appropriate at times. All I'm asking is that you tone down the descriptions a bit.

Total - 86.5/100