rhythmchyc -Perchance To Dream

Title: 5/5 

"To sleep, perchance to dream.." I'm a sucker for anyone who can work a Shakespearean quote into a title. The title doesn't sum up the plot or characters so much as the theme and the comparison to the dark love story between Ophelia and Hamlet. This title is one of the more interesting out there.

Blurb: 9/10 

The blurb does a wonderful job doing what blurbs do! It introduces the main characters, the struggle/conflict, and leaves the reader wondering how it all unfolds and is resolved. I always advise that review quotes, awards, and anything that's not the blurb or credit to the cover designer be put INSIDE the book to keep the blurb clean and simple. I didn't deduct for that since it's personal preference. The blurb itself is a bit modifier-heavy and sports a few punctuation errors. Other than that, it gets the job done well.

Cover: 5/5

I feel like this was not always the cover of this book. Did it once have a different one? In any case, I like the way the abstraction of the cover's faces say a lot and echo the story's conflict in something as simple as how they look at one another. I'm not a huge fan of the simple white bottom of the book with your name and "Book 1" in blockish letters, but I understand the concept of it being scrawled on a white canvas.

Plot: 18/20 

I love the plot of this book because it subverts expectations. The plot, as described in the blurb, prepares the reader for what sounds like a chick-lit, beach-read love story. Instead, it is a psychological thriller/dark romance that captivates and bends the mind and emotions. I always personally think it could go a little further with the dark themes, the sexuality, the madness that is akin to Ophelia and Hamlet. Then again, I do NOT think this book is chick-lit. A reason it's often overlooked is that it is difficult to categorise. Those who go into this book expecting a cute romance about a college girl and an actor will potentially be disappointed. It is, however, a piece of excellent writing.

Characterisation: 20/20

Perfect scores are hard to come by for me, but character work is your forte. It's an appropriate fit for you to write about the theatre, and it's brilliant how the characters never lose their connection to the themes in "Hamlet".. When Katherine first meets Nicholas, there's a bit of "Oh, no, please not another Fifty Shades Of Grey." Fortunately, it pulls away from THAT kind of obsession to something much darker and vibrant. The characters, even the supporting cast, pull away from the page and help to create a world that's immersive.

Creativity/Originality: 9/10

Let's face it, there's a bit of cliche in the overall idea of this story. That's why summarizing it hardly does it justice. The way you took a simple premise that is indeed a chick-lit story through and through but turned it into something reminiscent of Alfred Hitchock's Gaslight and other film noir stories is impressive. This story, like its characters, is so much more than it appears to be at first sight. Whether the reader loves or hates the twists and turns it mentally instills, one thing is certain: it's original. I only wish readers knew up-front just how unique this story is, rather than marketing it as "college girl obsessed with perfect actor." That may have been your original premise, and honestly, that's not all that original. It's everything the book turned into that's impressive.

Spelling/Grammar: 13/15 

I wish there were a category for "writing style". You have a definite way of storytelling that's almost literary, but still manages to incorporate modern-day dialogue seamlessly. I've never seen so many synonyms for "green" in one opening. ;) While I'd give you a perfect score for style, there are still grammatical errors. The way you have of writing beautifully descriptive prose followed by sentence fragments is, at least for this reader, jarring. For me, some of the phrasing and the flow of the sentences due to grammar/punctuation is this book's weakest point. It's time to send this one off to the editor and then out for publication. In my opinion, that's where this is in the storytelling journey.

Enjoyability: 5/5 

This is not the first time I've read this book, but it's improved significantly throughout its journey. It's achieved a level of depth and ode to literature that is appealing to intelligent readers, and the romance is sensual rather than tawdry. This is a book that makes you think and feel at the same time, and that's what kept me reading the entire book in one sitting. Highly enjoyable.

Literary Devices: 5/5 

Oh, does this book make use of those literary devices! I love it. In addition to some beautifully written descriptive passages, the story allows similes and metaphors to abound. I notice it's been toned down a bit since I first read the story, and this is a wise choice. When it comes to your use of adjectives, particularly, enough can be enough. I think you've edited enough to land on that sweet spot that combines the literary and the straightforward. Lovely work here.

Descriptive Writing: 4/5

I want to give a perfect score for descriptive writing because you have so much natural talent with it. It's because you do that I probably hold this work to a higher standard than most. In addition to the tone shifts being jarring (i.e. the way you go from "viridian" to "Baby"), the change between elegant prose and things expressed via sentence fragments/disjointed thoughts is irksome to this reader. When describing things, one adjective is more poignantly felt by the reader than three in a row. It's a double-edged sword that this book is executed so well that mistakes are amplified.

Again, there's no mistake in this book that working with a talented editor wouldn't clean up. If we still had bookstores, I'd fully expect to see this in Barnes & Noble within a year.

Total: 93/100