SarahBeth9009- Willow and the Warlock

TITLE 5/5

The title speaks for itself, without giving away too much of the plotline. It's intriguing and catches your eye immediately. 

DESCRIPTION/BLURB 8/10

I like your description but I feel like you're giving away one of your major plot twists. As the story unfolds we should have no idea about the new science teacher until the point where you reveal it to Willow. We should be as shocked as she is when she learns about what he is. Other than that it's pretty solid.

COVER 2/5

Your cover is pretty basic compared to the overall plot of the book. I feel that it lacks a bit and as soon as I started reading I realized why. It's an amazing piece of work and I feel it deserves an amazing cover. Now I know you said this is for NaNo so I'm guessing you haven't gotten around to the cover part yet so I'm excited to see what you do with this.

PLOT 15/20

Ah, the good stuff, all great stories start with a great plot. Now you seem to have this down. There is a beginning, middle and end. But if I could make one suggestion it's to maybe amp up the tension before your inciting incident (Willow hears from the moon Goddess she must save the world). You can do this in a lot of different ways I can suggest a few: Willow's powers start to act out (you give us a small glimpse of this beforehand in the science lab) and she can even hear the Moon Goddess speaking to her before the encounter on the beach.

CHARACTERIZATION 16/20

I love Willow and Sage, they make the perfect dream team and then you go and toss in Phoenix and it rounds out their gang! I would suggest bringing in Willow's mom though. She is quite the prominent force and readers need to see a bit more of her. Love grams though, smart and witty! 

CREATIVITY AND ORIGINALITY 8/10

Okay so I wouldn't say the plot is completely original. We've seen it before but what makes your book unique is the fact that you don't rely too heavily on any romantic subplots, which is quite refreshing honestly. This book gives me Percy Jackson meets Harry Potter vibes. Keep up the good work!

SPELLING AND GRAMMAR 14/15

You slayed this! You had typos here and there but nothing too distracting. I followed along effortlessly.

ENJOYABILITY 5/5

Twelve year old me was going bonkers for this book! Made me feel like a kid again. Pretty sure if this was the first book I ever read, I would still be in love with reading as I am now (I started on the Nancy Drew series by the way!)

LITERARY DEVICES 5/5

This was one thing you need no help with at all! I loved how you described the creaking bridge in the beginning and it's easily understandable (considering the age group). Teach me your ways!

DESCRIPTIONS 5/5

Again not much I can tell you since all descriptions are vivid enough for me to picture exactly how the story unfolds! Good job!

TOTAL: 83 /100