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THIRD PLACE🥉

Total Score:80/100

A Ballad of Inferno and Ruin By AdrielleReina

Judge:TierneyDanae

• Title: 7/10

I see the connections between the title and the plot, however the title makes me think more 'fantasy fiction horror' than 'modern-day wartime/survival/zombie horror.' I like the flow and sound of the title, and it is unique and intriguing, but made me expect a different style. Perhaps the title comes into play later on in the book a tad more.

• Cover: 3/5

I like the color scheme and interest of the cover, but again, it made me think more of fantasy or a hunger games style and didn't really portray 'survival/zombie horror'. I really like the style of both the title and the cover - if it was for a different genre. The font reminds me a bit of "Supernatural" which maybe also lent itself to me associating it with fantasy/lore more than horror.

• Blurb: 9/10

The blurb is well written and gives hints of what will happen and the background/setting. I like that you let readers know it has similar qualities to The Last of Us, as that lets people know this isn't a traditional horror but a more modern take on the genre - the 'survival horror' and lets them know that there will more than likely be zombies or a disease, etc. It's hard to fit everything into a blurb but I think this did a good job of intriguing readers to continue.

• Setting: 8/10

I really enjoyed your setting and descriptions of the Appalachian area, I can tell you have experience. I like being able to feel like I can picture scenes and settings - sometimes that's what makes a horror truly creepy is the writer's ability to give detail to a gruesome scene so the reader can picture it. I saw lots of details in the natural settings that I enjoyed, though going deeper into some of the murder/death details (even in hunting scenes in the first few chapters) to bring a bit more dark and set the tone for the story could help it play with reader's emotions more.

• Character and emotions : 7/10

I feel like I understand the main character the most, and though she is in the midst of multiple traumatic events, sometimes I felt like her responses were thinner than expected (or maybe not thinner, but it would happen quickly and be described shortly and then move on). Like in the chapter where Caleb and she return to find everyone murdered, more details about her response and having it be more drawn out (longer chapters) would connect her more deeply and give her more emotions that the reader can understand/see - like using different senses/descriptions. (IE instead of 'she threw up to the side of his body' talk about her feeling the bile burning her throat and nose as her stomach rose, or her chest tightening and fists shaking, nails digging into her palms until the scent of new blood mingled with her family's stale ones as she coldly explains that she will hunt the killers down - to show that though she is controlled on the outside, she is an inferno inside). When you write first person, it gives you the opportunity to let the readers into the characters head and see/feel what they do, even if they don't say it to any other character out loud.

• Plot and detail: 17/20

Though this isn't my particular favorite genre of horror, and maybe there is a better category for it, I thought it was well thought out and written, and gave a unique look at what would happen if civil war, world war, and then an antigen swirled together to create an 'end times' kinda idea. I am interested in how you will finish the book/story. I didn't see any plot holes or confusing bits, though I do think making the characters' reactions/inside thoughts more known and slightly longer-winded to make sure people see the importance/depth of their feelings or gravity of the situation (with more 'dramatic' emotion/descriptive words) will help the story length and richness. Sometimes if we say something briefly, it can be taken as less important or even glossed over as someone reads, and we want to make sure those big ticket plot points or chapters hit with a BANG!

• Flow and style: 16/20

I thought the beginning was a little slow, as I had to go past the first 5 chapters to really get into the plot point. I can definitely appreciate a slow roll (that's my style as well), but I think there needs to be a bit more action or movement in the beginning to add some draw. Perhaps when they are leaving their house for the first time, or hiding from the check in the secret cooler in Caleb's shop the first time, you can add more details to show the fear or 'action.' It used words that were understandable and didn't hang up readers on any particular parts or unnecessary wordiness, in my opinion.

• Grammar and Spelling: 10/10

I didn't see any noticeable errors in grammar or spelling. I didn't fine-tooth comb or grammarly, etc the piece, but it is clearly written well and you definitely have a firm grasp of writing styles, tense, and grammar.

• Personal Enjoyment: 3/5

It takes all kinds of unique and wonderful people to make all of the unique and wonderful things in this world - and I love that you are writing a genre you enjoy and clearly understand well. That being said, this wasn't my style or the type of story I usually would pick up - no shade there, as again, it's all just personal preference. I am usually pretty critical of books and stories, and that doesn't mean they are poor at all, it just means it didn't tickle my specific enjoyment.

BUT - if everyone only created things I liked, then we would have so much less diversity in the world! I don't like country music or bright colors - but if everyone else was the same as me and there was no country music or vibrant clothes, well, the world would be worse off. So, I am glad you have written such a well thought out plot and book, even if it isn't technically my cup of ultra-specific, unsweetened, iced, green tea with half of lemon (see, I'm picky) <3

Additional Feedback- I wonder if there is another genre this could fit into really well? Like a potentially-semi-historical-but-in-the-future political fiction? Or maybe, the scary aspect of the zombies will elevate the later chapters of the book to fit more into the genre. Or maybe I'm just old school and think of horror less in the survival-way and more in the stabby-screamy way. I suppose one of the reasons The Last of Us was scary was because it was more disturbing and constant suspense, and maybe the key will be to choose if you want to go the more descriptive of the gore direction or the more descriptive of the constant suspense and trauma of the situation direction.

Two ties for second place🔥

SECOND PLACE🥈

Total score:83/100

Frightmares: Creature in the Woods by WadeRideout
Judge:TierneyDanae

• Title: 8/10

I like the title because it seems horror-like and gives a good idea of what kind of horror this will be. I think it's a little simple/blunt or 'on the nose' but I think that kinda fits this sort of style (child main character, funny last name and humor throughout, 'frightmares'). Once I began reading, I think the style of the title fits the style of the book well - almost a 'feelgood horror' or child-fantasy-horror like 'don't look under the bed' (disney show from my childhood ><).

• Cover: 5/5

I was impressed by the cover because it looks like a comic book you would find on the shelves more than Wattpad. Well done! It doesn't scream 'the scariest book you'll ever read' or even 'adult horror' but it definitely matches the style, along with the title - all around it is a cohesive piece for youth horror.

• Blurb: 8/10

The blurb tells correctly what to expect from the book and is written in the same voice as the story in general, which helps readers be able to check out the book style ahead of time to see if its something they wouold be interested in.

• Setting: 8/10

The setting is well described, sometimes a tad confusing to follow as the character will think things that aren't true or are from his active imagination - however, by reading carefully, you can figure out what's his imagination/embellished and what's real. Sometimes the descriptions are a bit extra (her face changed from purple to red - when neither is probably fully true) but I think this fits with the style and the main character's exaggerated view of some things.

• Character and emotions: 7/10

I found the character silly, enjoyable, and well written as a youth hero. Sometimes his responses seemed a little silly (per his personality & name) but I think this makes sense as a youth horror. When you did add in his emotions of fear, they were believable and he seemed to act in character throughout the book. Occasionally his dancing/talking to himself seemed a little extra - but this might just be a personal preference from me as I'm not used to child main characters.

• Plot and detail: 17/20

I liked some of the campy horror tropes like the eyes in the woods and the scraping at the window in the beginning being from a tree, dancing in his underwear, etc. I think that flowed well with the campfire/sleepover scary story/nightmare genre. The plot didn't have holes or confusing parts - and anything that wasn't understood in the moment is explained later (like the end talking about how certain people ended up in certain locations/situations).

• Flow and style: 17/20

I felt like this was easy to read with a good flow, besides the occasional time where you needed to read it through twice to see what had truly happened versus how the MC described it. The flow of the plot was nice, with no slow or extended periods without action/forward motion. The writing style is distinct and unique, and I can tell the author has a strong voice/style that continues throughout the story.

• Grammar and Spelling: 10/10

I didn't see any noticeable errors in grammar or spelling. I didn't fine-tooth comb or grammarly, etc the piece, but it is clearly written well and you definitely have a firm grasp of writing styles, tense, and grammar.

• Personal Enjoyment: 3/5

When I think of horror I think of adult horror/traditional horror a bit more, so this wasn't my particular favorite just because it isn't meant for my age group or my style and I prefer more sparingly humor. However - that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with this story - I simply prefer my horror stories a bit more disturbing with perhaps deeper themes. For a campfire/youth scary story, I think this was a cohesive piece from the title to the cover to the voice/tone to the story - it's just not my kind of sub genre within the greater horror style and so the story didn't grab me.

Additional Feedback- I hope you keep writing and many people see, read, and enjoy your work! You clearly have a good grasp of flow and style and grammar along with story telling (:

SECOND PLACE🥈

Total score 83/100

The Death You See by DancingVisions

Judge:Meagz56

• Title: 8/10

The title is very unique as it provides a vague insight into what the story is about, which is incredibly eye catching.

• Cover: 5/5

The cover is incredibly eye catching. The use of colors and font immediately drew my attention!

• Blurb: 8/10

For me, the blurb has always been more difficult than actually writing the book. I feel the author has done an incredible job in providing readers with the plot of the story, as well as insight of what to expect.

• Setting: 8/10

The setting is very relevant to the story. I can picture the surroundings perfectly through the author's descriptions.

• Character and emotions : 8/10

The story immediately starts with a twist which I find extremely shocking but intriguing. My opinion of Lauren immediately shifts within a few paragraphs. Her behavior does a complete 180.

• Plot and detail: 17/20

The story immediately takes a dark twist instead of the usual build-up (which I found refreshing). The situation with Lauren has immediately added an interesting dynamic into the story that made me want to read more.

• Flow and style: 17/20

The story flows easily as I tend to get distractic if language is too formal. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this story.

• Grammar and Spelling: 8/10

I have never focused too much on human errors in writing, It's all about the story in my view. The author made an amazing effort in regards to spelling and grammar.

• Personal Enjoyment: 4/5

I have always been a sucker for horror and this book did not dissapoint. The author has amazing potential.

Additional Feedback-

I cannot wait to see what the future holds for this author as I see so much potential for success.

FIRST PLACE🥇

Total score: 88/100

Hilltop House by SarahQuinnMcGrath
Judge:KeaniCupido

• Title: 8/10

T

he title of the story definitely tells us where most of the story revolves around — In a house on top of a hill. I removed 2 points, because it's a short name, however it is still eerie and gives a sense of gloom and mystery.

• Cover: 4 /5

I love the cover! This reminds me of the old books I used to read when I was younger. It has a similar horrific feel to it, so it gave me a sense of nostalgia. I appreciate the font as well, as it definitely tells the reader that it is a horror/thriller. I especially love the detail of the blood splats here and there.

I also love the eyes on the cover— it makes me think of The Hills have eyes.

• Blurb: 8 /10

The blurb was very informative, and it caught my eyes. I love how you personified the house itself and having that relationship with the main character, Cora. I also love that you gave us a taste of the mysteries and secrets that are within that house and within her own family as well.

• Setting: 9/10

Most of the setting takes place in the house itself. I personally, really loved the way the house was described. It took me into the world itself, and I could really sense my own house watching me, which shows how well written the descriptions were. I especially enjoyed how well the setting was described; the types of tiles, the walls, even the green mat. Also, I enjoyed the way the 'house' refers to its internal structure as 'bones,' which the current resident, Maeve, also refers to as bones in chapter 2. This was an excellent time to demonstrate the thoughts of the house influencing her and the daughter.

Rich in details about the house and the old-styled design of it — beehive tiles, everything white, nicely trimmed yards. It was definitely painting a picture for me as I read this.

• Character and emotions : 8/10

From the chapters I've read, I could really see the development of the characters and their behaviours. Cora and her mother, Maeve, for example, have such a unique mother and daughter dynamic, but their respective characters do not fail to pique my interests either. We can clearly see that due to Maeve's own negligence with regards to her drinking problem, Cora has developed some rebellious qualities. However, we also see this to be a good lesson for Cora, as she has never wished to drink, in fact, she came to develop a dislike toward alcohol, drugs etc.

With regards to our very special House — this was by far my favourite character in the entire judging. The complexity and personalisation that the author created was extremely well done. I loved how the author also made the house seem that it was not human. In other words, the types of things the house says such as presenting its interests in the residents' bodily structures, i.e., the bones in their fingers and teeth. I, for one, am eager to read on and see where the story goes.

• Plot and detail: 18/20

From the chapters that I've already read, I could see that the plot was pretty solid. However, the way in which the author writes the story, one cannot foresee the end result, because it's also unpredictable. I hadn't expected the house itself to be one of the speakers in the story, and I definitely had not expected it to crave the chattering of someone's teeth. Even though I can confirm the well-written nature of the book, I did feel that there was something missing from the first two chapters of Cora. I could not put my finger on it, but there was something missing that I craved.

• Flow and style:19/20

The flow is very fluid and easy to read. I did not find any difficulty with the pace or the style of the way the author wrote. I also really appreciate the vast dynamic of the author's vocabulary. It was not simply easy words (which I like to call baby words) but was very sophisticated, and challenged the reader as well.

The style of the story is also very "flowy" and easy to read along.

• Grammar and Spelling: 9/10

I took one point away, because at some moments I noticed that there were unnecessary commas being used. Other than that, both spelling and grammar were on point. Just as a note, a comma is used to either suggest a pause or the use of conjunctions such as so, because, that etc.

• Personal Enjoyment: 5/5

I found myself enjoying the story way more than what I thought I would. It was a pleasant surprise to see that the house itself was the voice/speaker of the prologue and respective POV chapters. It was a unique touch that I really appreciated.

I would also like to quote one of my favourite lines, which I took from the prologue:

"I am that spectre-filled structure, replete with horrors enough to drive one mad...but aren't we all, a little bit?" Absolutely loved this line so much. The way it was said in a nonchalant way made me enjoy it even more.

Additional Feedback- All in all, I really appreciated this book and the fact that it's truly horrific. Reading this made me turn around and watch my room's walls in search of eyes poking about. Truly an incredible and unique way of creating this story. I'd definitely recommend this book to everyone.