Chapter Five: Bonfire

As the months passed I grew to feel safe and loved in the Steven's home. I attended regular school. I still held onto the facade of being a normal twelve-year-old. In the month of June I confessed my birth date to Kristin and Patrick after much prodding on their part.

Kristin was already making plans for a big party. She said I should invite all of my friends. I was glad to see that I had made some in the few months I had lived with the Stevens. After coming home on the last day of school Kristin met me at the front door.

"Aurora, did you have your list together?"

"Yes, it's right here, but isn't it a little early to plan?"

"Oh, no, dear, it's never too early to plan a party. Oh, Aurora, this is going to be your best birthday ever."

I had to admit that I too was excited by the prospect of a party.

Kristin took the list from me. "Oh, this is just fine. Now, you run along and play."

"I would like a swim."

"Oh, wonderful, but stay out of the deep end, and dinner's at five today not six. And do wear one of those pretty dresses."

I ran towards the patio and into the poolroom. I changed into my swimsuit and dove into the pool. The water felt so good that I didn't want to get out. I felt like I was born to be a fish. Kristin even suggested I join the swim team when school started next year. At first I thought the idea a little absurd, but I did enjoy swimming. So I thought why not?

After I finished my swim I went upstairs to my room to change for dinner. I didn't like wearing dresses much, but I did it only to appease Kristin's ego. Almost every night some business contact of Patrick's showed up at our door with their wives. It was very important to Kristin that the women of the Lady's League accepted her. They all knew that I was adopted but thought Kristin a saint for taking me in. At first it made me feel like a charity case, but Kristin explained that was just the way with socialites.

Even in my privileged life in Maine I was isolated from most of the harsh realities of life, and I was never treated like a poor refugee. As Aurora that was who I was. Even with all the wonderful things Kristin and Patrick had given me I still longed to be Mary.

As I came down to dinner there was a sudden feeling of dread that came into my mind. When I entered the dining room I noticed Patrick and Kristin were speaking with a man. I couldn't see his face at first, because his back was to me. When he turned around I was shocked.

"Aurora, this is Doctor Brown. Doctor Brown this is our daughter Aurora."

"Hello, Aurora," he said and took my hand. I saw the glare in his eye. It was as if he knew who I was. To the Stevens he said, "You have a beautiful daughter."

I wanted to slap him for saying that, because he was the reason I was here. He was the person who caused Mother's demise and the death of the real Aurora. I thought I would choke on my food with him sitting across from me. After dinner I quickly excused myself to my bedroom. I couldn't stand being in the same room with him. Even as I traveled up the stairs I still felt the animosity. The man who had ruined my life was just downstairs. I wanted to put as much distance between us as possible, but no matter what part of the house I went to I knew he was too close.

I took out Mother's doll, which I safely hid in the bottom of my hope chest. I never wanted Kristin to know about the doll. It would be a constant reminder

that I once belonged to someone else. I put the doll away just in time before Kristin came into my room.

"Aurora," she said with a stern look on her face, "that was very rude of you. We had a guest, and you didn't say anything to him all night."

"I'm not feeling well. That's all."

"Oh. Let me feel your forehead. Humm, no fever. Perhaps you should go to bed. Do you want me to tuck you in?"

"No. I'll be fine."

"Okay, but if you're not better by morning I'm taking you to see the doctor. Agreed?"

"Yes, Ma'am," I said.

She left my room, and I was glad. I didn't want her to see me in the condition I was in. I felt bad enough about lying to her, but I couldn't tell her the truth. I almost did that with Missy, and I was glad she perceived it as a different deception. Something was happening to me. I was changing, and I didn't know how to stop it.

Now I wished I hadn't destroyed Uncle Martin's book. Perhaps my fears were in part induced by his cryptic message. It was all I thought about as I drifted into sleep.

I woke the next morning surprised that I had not dreamed. The house was quiet, too quiet. It was nearly ten o' clock. Patrick must have left for work by that time. I went to the bathroom as usual, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was about to lose everything I've worked so hard for. Today I needed solitude. I stayed in my room reading some of the books I borrowed from the Steven's library.

The mid-morning sun came bursting into my room when I noticed a tiny blue bird at my window. I ran to the window to behold the sight. What I witnessed was tragic. The poor little thing was dying. It looked as if it were attacked by a predator. Its wing had been broken and it had a gash on its breast. I picked it up and caressed its head.

Unlike most creatures it did not flinch at my touch or try a means of escape. "It's all right little bird," I said. A tear escaped my eye.

I wished more than anything to take its pain away and to watch it fly once more. In its freedom I would be content. I took the little bird to my table and laid it there. My heart was breaking at the sight of the tiny bird wobbling aimlessly.

Not able to see the poor thing in misery any longer I picked it up ready to smother it to give it the peace that only death could bring, but something miraculous happened. It was something similar to what happened in the bathroom on my first day here, but instead of releasing pain I was absorbing it. I could feel in my bones. I wanted to cry out, but I kept hold of myself. Then I saw the bird's wound starting to heal. The pain I felt became more tolerable. The bird looked into my eyes after its strength gradually returned. It did my heart good as I watched it fly away. The blue glow returned imprinting my entire body.

The glow stayed with me. I could see it through my full-length mirror. At that moment Kristin walked in on me. She screamed at the sight of me and cowered in the corner of the room.

As I came towards her she screamed out even louder. "Stay away, you monster! You're one of them. Stay away!"

"Kristin, what's wrong?" I asked in confusion. "What did I do?"

"No, don't hurt me!" She screamed once more.

The glow passed as quickly and quietly as it came. I tried to get Kristin to calm down, but she was too frightened. She finally calmed down enough for me to talk to her.

"You!" She shouted. "You're one of them."

"What are you talking about?"

"You know what I'm talking about," she said, grabbing me. "Kayla warned me, but I didn't listen."

She dragged me across the room and opened the closet door. "You're going where all monsters go." She threw me in and locked the door behind her.

"Kristin, no, don't lock me up, please."

"Who are you? Did you lie about who you are?" I cried out in pain. My claustrophobia consumed me. "Answer me. Did you lie?"

"Yes," I cried. "I'm not Aurora. I'm Mary. My parents were doctors, Roland and Josephine. My name is Marianna Faigon. I'm sorry. Please, let me out!"

"No," she screamed. "Monsters deserve to be locked

up."

"I'm not a monster! I'm not!"

I heard Kristin leave the room and the patter of footsteps going down the stairs. The rage in me swelled once again, but this time the anxiety was more hostile and quicker to surface, compounded by the anxiety of my claustrophobia. I couldn't control the rage that exploded out of me. I felt as if I were changing again, but this time no peaceful glow filled me with warmth. Something darker was coming to possess me. I wasn't sure what it was, but something that was determined to free me.

I forced myself out of the prison my adoptive mother put me in. My strength had tripled allowing me to tear the hinges off the door frame. Yet another who had confessed to love me had betrayed me, but this time I had been put in the position to avenge the crime.

"Kristin!" I screamed. "You can't hide from me!"

I ravaged the hallways, but I only caught glimpses of my own reflection. My avenger's spirit had taken on a face of its own.

My skin possessed a darker hue and my teeth and fingernails grew longer. My eyes glowed a dark frightening red. I had assuredly became the monster

Kristin accused me of being.

My anger grew, and all I could do was observe as some dark unknown force took over my body. It's like I was trapped inside, and this demon had taken charge of my life. I started to destroy all of Kristin's precious things. Her lamps I had shattered into tiny fragments without one bit of remorse. I entered the living room and threw things as I went along. I started with the television and ripped the sofa to shreds. I called her name once again.

"Kristin, come out and face me!"

"Leave me alone, Aurora!" she cried.

"Aurora's dead...like you!"

I ran towards the dining room where I found Kristin huddled in a corner. She screamed out in terror as I stood over her.

"Get up, Kristin."

"No! Go away! Leave me alone! Please, Aurora, don't hurt me!"

"Too late! You hurt Mary. Now, you die."

I thrust my claws into her chest and watched the blood spew from her body. I felt the remorse that the creature ignored. Even so I couldn't stop it. I had killed, but I wondered if I had a choice. If I had I refused to take it.

"Good-bye, Kristin," I said through clenched teeth.

My body took on another transformation and turned back into my former self. I looked upon the body of Kristin newly dead and wept.

"Why did you do it?" I cried.

I wasn't sure if I had directed the question to her or to myself.

Suddenly, I smelled smoke and raced into the living room. It was ablaze with fire reaching almost to the ceiling. I ran up to my room and gathered my few treasures, some money I had saved and a few clothes.

As I reached the staircase fire had consumed everything. "Somebody, help me," I cried out.

That's when I heard the angel voice in my head again. "Mary," it said, "down the back stairs. Hurry."

It was the friendly voice I knew so well. It wasn't at all like the other, the one that killed Kristin. That one more intrigued me than frightened me, but this time I was in the company of the angel-voice guiding me to freedom.

As I ran towards the back door of the kitchen I heard a loud thunder. Glass shot out of the house. A glorious creation I had conjured. I stood proud watching my child grow.

It no longer needed me since it reached its adulthood, so I left it to bask in its own glory. A proud mother I was, but my taste for blood frightened me as well as fascinated me.

I fled into the woods and wondered where my life would lead next. I would never return to the orphanage.

If I did everyone would know what I did. My only choice was to walk away.

I laid Aurora to rest. Never would I be her again. I could never be Mary either. The child Mary was dead. All that remained of her was M.

I made my way to the bus despot by morning. I was tired and worn out and looked for place to wash and freshen up. After buying a one-way ticket to Chicago I quickly ran to the bathroom.

The small washroom was uninviting with the stench of old piss and a bag of dirty feminine products no one bothered to dispose of. I made myself at least halfway presentable and waited back in the terminal waiting for my bus to come.

Two hours passed as I sat in the uncomfortable seat reading a magazine when an old drunk came to sit next to me.

He looked at me strangely and said, "Hey, what are

you supposed t' be?"

I rose from my seat and walked away from him, pretending that I didn't hear him, but he followed me anyway. "Come back here, girl. I's takin' to ya." He

made a grab for me, which I easily blocked.

"Go away," I shouted.

"You gonna be nice t' me, or..."

"Or what?" said another stranger who had just approached the scene. He had a thick English accent. "I believe the lady asked you to leave her alone."

"Stay out of this, Sonny. She's mine."

I stumped my foot down on his and said, "That's what you think." I let my hand touch his as a black mist of heat swelled in me.

His cries of pain startled me. He ran off. I could hear him scream from the pain that I had caused him.

"That was awesome," he said. "How did you do that?"

"I don't know," I said. "Family secret, I guess."

"The name's Pete. What's yours?"

"M," I said and looked out the station windows once again. "Thanks for trying to help."

"It didn't look to me like you needed any. So is M your real name?"

"It is now," I said, refusing to look in the face. I sat down on the bench once more. He sat down next to me. I wanted more than anything for him to go away. He put his hand on mine, and I quickly snatched it away.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said, fiddling nervously with my bag.

"Hey, that's cool. So, ah, where you headed?"

"You ask a lot of questions."

"None of which you're answerin', which only proves one thing. You're a runaway. Question is what are ya runnin' from?"

"You wouldn't understand," I fumed.

"Tell me," he smiled. "Pretty thing like you don't have much to run from. Who would want to hurt you?"

"Everyone," I said and moved away from him. My relief came when the bus finally showed up. I quickly ran outside to meet it.

I didn't want Pete getting too close to me. I couldn't let anyone else for that matter. A cloud of death followed me. One I couldn't wish away.