"The wise are wise only because they love. The fools are fools only because they think they can understand love" - Paulo Coelho

Picture above is the one on the book ^^^^^ :) (You'll know it when you get there.)

I have decided to speak the truth from within me: what and how I felt about all this. Moreover, choosing the right words might save my neck in the next few seconds.

"It is the uncertainty of what I have lost." I answered. And with a shaking voice I added "Moreover, it is the uncertainty of what you might become, that I fear the most"

He chuckled, his back slightly vibrating with the motion. "I believe you meant, what I had already become." he said. "And as for what you have lost-" He slowly faced me. His usual warm greeting was replaced with an emotionless one. His mouth had two elongated canines sticking out. It looked sharp as the moonlight reflected upon it, creating somewhat a glow.

"I never wanted to hurt you" he said "It was never my intention, dearest Rosabelle. Believe me"

I kept silent. I could feel my heart beating faster with each passing moment. I feel like it could jump out of my chest because of the speed it's going in.

And his bloodshot eyes.

They were a burning ruby from their usual infinite springs. It was terrifying.

"It pains me that you haven't read my biography in that book I gave you. It was pretty much the only use of that book, really" he leaned casually on the balcony edge, seeming calm about all this "More so that you have read that beast's"

My eyes widened. It had never crossed my mind, but now, it all made sense.

It all makes sense.

Regan.

My breath came in shallow as I struggled for a reply.

He never failed to miss my reactions. He smiled a crazed smile "Then you get it now, don't you? Then say it Rosabelle." He had raised his hands fast and I put up mine to somehow shield myself, but he just grabbed it, and embraced me. Softly than he ever did. "Say what I am Rose" he whispered to my ear.

"I need not say it" it slipped from my lips to come off as a whisper "You are my Julianne"

"I was." he meekly replied "I wanted to stay as far away as possible, but the pull was too damn strong."

He rushed into me with such inhumane speed, placing his hands on either side of my face. The impact had cracked the glass doors behind me and had my breath caught in my throat.

He placed his head beside mine as his canines scraped my neck "Does the sight of me still flatter you dearest Rosabelle?" he whispered close to my ear.

Tears started falling relentlessly from my face both from fear and exhaustion. My feet felt weak as they struggled to stay up when my body was instilled with so much fear.

"It does not Julienne" I squeaked "not anymore"

I can feel him smiling in my neck. "I couldn't expect less of my sweet, little Rosabelle"

His hand made a motion to my face. I closed my eyes afraid of the contact. I waited for a harsh slap or even a rough stroke, when his hand suddenly held my face with the familiar softness.

"You must understand, I waited decades Rose." He muttered "You know not of the pain I endured just to be with you now." His voice laced a hidden pain behind every word. "To have you close, as you are now"

"Then tell me." I wrapped my arms around his wide torso, clinging like my life had depended upon it. "Make me understand" I whispered.

"Argh!" he had smashed the glass doors behind in frustration, one with too much force that it shattered. I fell backwards, automatically putting my hands up for protection from the floor, as I wait for my body to meet the hard surface underneath.

He had enveloped me seconds before the collision, putting his body up, to protect mine.

"To make you understand, means to bring you pain" he whispered. He was holding me, his body underneath mine. Even as I notice the shards from underneath had pierced his skin and had drawn blood, he never wavered. "And I would never want to bring you pain"

"Let go Julianne, you're hurt" I wanted to break from his grasps to help him up, but his strong arms kept me in place. "Shards are digging into your skin Julianne! Let me go!"

"You truly wish to understand me?" he whispered "Then know that this pain pales in comparison to what I have endured for the past years. I have done so much, for things to work out the way I had planned it" his voice shook. I feel that he was somehow close to breaking down. "The way I had planned it, for you" he finished. "We were destined to be together, you have felt it and so have I, so why?"

"I don't understand" I said, his grip tightened on me "You are hurting me Julianne" I tried to pry his arms off but it was no use. He was exasperatingly too strong!

"You do not understand. You are hurting me" he mumbled.

"Am I not enough?" he whispered. It was too faint to hear, but somehow I had managed to. "it's that damn mutt again..." he said it with so much distaste.

As my eyes met his, I had witnessed Julianne cry for the first time. It was heart-piercingly painful, considering he had showed me nothing but kindness in the short time we have been together, and I have only brought him pain. He made me feel loved and wanted. And even as I struggled to break free from his grasps, I wasn't sure if it was really what I wanted.

What did I want?

Did I want to stay away from him, or share in his pain, knowing that I was somehow the cause of it?

What had Julianne done that had hurt him so much all these years? And what had I?

Was it me that caused him this pain?

After moments of deliberation, I have decided to stay by his side until he is in proper condition to converse with me. I was not a coldhearted person, and besides that, I couldn't handle seeing Julianne in this state.

It reminded me too much of Regan that night.

Along with the wall that Julianne had destroyed moments ago, came the rushing of several other distant memories that was locked away from me.

I never knew what to do in situations like these, having been kept too long in the shadows. I decided to do what I considered was right.

I'll stay by his side.

After that little incident with Julianne last night, he lost consciousness with me still in his arms. From exhaustion as I presume.

I decided that night that my questions can wait for tomorrow.

I carried him with all my might towards the bed I was in moments ago. It was less than a meter away though he was, as expected, heavy. I carefully placed him by his side to prevent the glass shards from further digging into his skin.

I wasn't even shocked at how I knew what to do with these kinds of wounds, having been a healer in my past life. I found health supplies in the bathroom and put it in use. Rather, what shocked me was that once I carefully take a shard out from his back, the wound would automatically knit together slowly, leaving no mark after. As if nothing even happened there in the first place, not even a scar was present.

Up to now, I was staring at the master's sleeping form on the bed, while I was the one on the chair beside him. It was like we just switched places from where we were months ago.

My mind quickly wandered to what Julianne had said.

I really haven't read what he was at all in that book! If you think about it, I only read Regan's.

Why didn't I read his profile? And why Lycans?

I was confused as well on why I was drawn to the Lycans' more than his kind.

Rather, could I be drawn to Regan more than him?

"It pains me that you haven't read my biography in that book I gave you" Julianne's voice echoed in my head "More so that you have read that beast's"

I must find that book. It may be holding the answers to the remaining questions that I seek. Last I've seen it I was at the servant's quarters. But that was months ago.

Could it still be there? If not it could be anywhere at this point.

It has been months, hasn't it? Chances of it being there were very slim.

But I still had to start somewhere.

I left my room while Julianne was still fast asleep on the bed. It was past midnight as I have checked on the grandfather clock on the way down, and it was still dark out. I simply cannot wait until morning; everything might once again change when I do wait for the sun to rise. I was afraid I would miss an opportunity if I wait any further.

I sauntered towards the servant's quarters; it had been my room after all. A mere shadow of what I am now. As much as it brought me pain of the memory where Dianne would once be here, having knowing she was gone, I couldn't deny the fact that it had also brought me happiness as well. It brought both happy and sad moments whenever I try to dig further in my memory.

I could almost relive those memories as if it was yesterday.

"Eli" it shout-whispered "It's me"

"Me who?" I retorted "I do not know any 'me'"

"Regan" the voice replied.

I stayed quiet. "Please. I need somewhere to hide. They're looking for me."

I stood up from my bed, wearing my slippers, and went to the door.

"Hurry" he said.

"I know." I shout whispered to the door.

I smiled. The memory had ended while my hand rested on the knob. I turned it while holding the lamp with my other hand. The door creaked as it opened. I shut it and lit up several lamps on the wall to light up the room.

The room had indeed remained untouched.

My room was exactly the way I had left it months ago, not a single item was out of place. Even the sheets were still crumpled and undone on the wooden bed near the wall. My eyes scanned the room, searching for one specific item. My gaze landed on the wooden table near my small bed.

If I remember correctly, the book was supposed to be there.

I was quite sure I had placed it there after reading it. It must be there! I couldn't think of any other place where it might be.

Dianne.

She must have hidden it somewhere. Somewhere she knows only I could find it.

But where?

A thought quickly ran to my head, and without wasting another second, I ran quickly to the kitchen, my steps echoing through the empty halls.

I knew it, Dianne cared for me, at least enough that she would hide the book for safety. She knew the moment everything would change, that book could somehow give me some answers. And somehow, she knew he would hide it, so she did it before Julianne can.

As for the reason, I still wasn't sure.

I slowly opened the oak doors leading to the kitchen. I had idiotically left the lamp on the table back in my room in a haste to get down here. Thankfully, there was still fire in the fireplace so the room was fairly lit. Dianne and I used to be the ones who would put it out every night.

I went to the place that came to mind where she could have hidden the book, my hands on the container. I pray to god I was right, because I simply don't know any other place where she could have hidden it.

Please God.

Please be here.

I chanted it over and over in my head. My right hand gripped the lid tightly, the other on the base of the cylinder. I opened it.

Please.

I struggled not to scream out in glee as I found the book. As predicted, it was tightly fitted unto the coffee bean container. It was a ceramic, lidded cylinder that Dianne had always used in making her daily cup of coffee. How I knew where to find it, even I was not sure.

It just felt... right, as weird as that may sound.

Thankfully the book's cover wasn't that hard, making it easier to fit into the cylinder. How efficient. Though the book was still a bit crumpled, and a few dust was forming it selves inside, maybe a few months here had done so, the book was still in tip-top shape.

I didn't waste any more moments. I quickly scanned the table of contents for the Vlads, finding it near the bottom.

Page 486

My fingers skimmed the pages until I had opened it on the page.

The Vlads (Vampires, Bloodhounds) are the direct descendants of the Linear line. They are believed to possess immortality for the price of blood offerings. As we have believed vampires to drink the blood of their victims, the Vlads are said to have offered themselves to Galirok, the blood god, creating the chain of vampires that started with the Linear Family. It was believed to have started with one general named Matchitehew Amos Linear III during the 1500's, at the era of the cross blood war. Having believed that Matchitehew was close to death, he was rumored to have called upon the blood god, offering the blood of his fallen enemies in exchange for immortality. Rumored to sacrifice 74 men in the enemy's army, nobody had seen him ever since, his body, never found.

The next page showed a worn out photograph of several army men, shield and swords at hand. There was a scribbled writing at the bottom of the photograph that read "1542 Rift Heiven Political Army" .They all had a different expression on their faces, one never the same from the other. There was a faintly circled face of an elderly man in the middle of the group.

He must be Matchitehew.

Matchitehew was frowning in this picture, making his visible wrinkles even more prominent. Though, I could imagine him trying to smile, it was already too late and the camera had already taken the picture. He stood in the middle of the crowd with a proud stature, his chin up with pride, while his arms were visibly by his sides.

After moments of staring into the picture, something captured my attention. While I scanned their faces one by one, my eyes landed on the farthest left corner of the photograph. My body ran cold as my legs once again threatened to give out.

It couldn't be.

There stood Julianne Vilgrain, with his hand on the handle of a sword struck unto the ground. He was wearing a joyful expression on his face, apparently oblivious to what awaits him during the war. His features were somewhat plain, but I was certain it was him.

It resembled him in more ways than one.

Though, the only difference was, he wasn't god-like nor perfect at all, as he was undoubtedly now.

He looked like any other youthful lad in the streets of Ravenshire that had a big dream in mind, reflected directly through the light in his eyes. He looked somewhat.....

Human.

Julianne Vilgrain was undoubtedly human, before the cross blood war, that I was sure of. His features were somewhat greatly enhanced during his change. What had caused his condition?

Could Matchitehew be the cause of Julianne's change? And who was he to Julianne? Could he somehow be related to him?

A sigh escaped my lips.

Though this little piece of information helped in shedding some light on the mystery, it lead to even more questions. Being me, the stupid and quite curious youth that I still am, I must confess, I yearned to get to the bottom of this as soon as possible, which can in turn accidentally render the facts around me useless. I might have missed something in all of this too.

How could I have been so blind for eighteen years? How could I have not doubted what was before me? How could I have been so stubborn as to disobey Dianne, when the clues are already hinted in her face?

She didn't want me to go that night. She knew, somehow, that going to Julianne would mean our separation, but I had idiotically disobeyed her, and look where it had gotten me? Further lost in the forest of secrets.

I don't enjoy being kept in the shadows all my existence; it simply was a crime against my basic rights as an individual. No matter what Julianne's reason was for keeping me uninformed, whether it was for my safety or his own gain, it simply was cruelty in my point of view. Having been denied with the basic information that you deserve, and finding out that your entire existence had been a lie to, and I quote, keep you safe, I had blindly agreed to his terms and conditions, blinded by an unexplainable, strong attraction towards him.

But lately, I've doubted that attraction.

I felt something different from a certain arrogant lad; something I would not normally feel towards a certain person. Strangely enough, I miss his teasing and that frowning face of his from my memories. His discovery had somehow filled the empty void in my chest.

His presence would always radiate warmth, as much as I try to deny it, whenever he was near me. I simply blamed it on his good looks, but now, I doubted it was only physical attraction.

Could there be a possibility that being reborn into another persona, as Elizabeth, can also change the destination I must take?

It doesn't always have to be the way it was planned for you.

I can layout the future for myself once this was all over, a path for me to take.

As I decided to walk back to the room where Julianne was, I sat unmoving on one of the island chairs in the kitchen, and having a moment's decision, I decided to stay for a moment. Come to think of it, I have never skipped a meal in my entire life, having been provided with the basic necessities for everyday, even back when I was still a servant in the manor.

I never got hungry, considering it was clearly impossible, as to Dianne had always eaten every meal, of everyday, with me.

Could Julianne have something to do with this?

It was a possibility.

After I had finished my meal, consisting of the untouched bread on the counter and a cheese I found on the wooden cabinets (far from my usual meals these past few months, I must say), I proceeded back to the room, wasting no time in walking.

I simply don't know what to answer Julianne once he starts asking where I have been to and what I have been doing. Though I doubt he'd forget what had happened last night.

It was hard for me to lie to him, so as much as possible, I try to avoid ramming into an instance where I have to. It was the least I can do to repay his kindness.

Julliane was still fast asleep when I had arrived quietly inside my bedroom. He looked even more angelic in his sleeping state, if that was even possible.

How could someone be this perfect?

I questioned myself, even after knowing that he wasn't always like that.

I pulled up a wooden chair beside the bed, my eyes feeling heavy with sleep. I decided to have a short nap beside him, sitting on the chair with my other half on the bed.

Before I knew it, I fell asleep only minutes after my head met the surface of the soft covers.