"You have me. Until every last star in the galaxy dies. You have me" - Amie Kaufman

I woke up the next morning near my bed, heaped on the floor. It looked like I tried to get on the bed but didn't have the strength to even climb on.

Remembering what had happened last night brought a frown to my face. I have decided to confront Dianne this morning to get some answers. Dianne obviously didn't sleep at our quarters last night, seeing I woke up at the floor. If she did come home last night, I would have woken up this morning on my bed.

It was the first time she didn't sleep in our room, I feel cold waking up without her warmth.

It was thirty minutes past five in the morning. I quickly dressed and went downstairs to the kitchen. My feet tapped on the marble floors as I bounded past the corridors and into the kitchen. Dianne usually seats at the kitchen island, having her cup of freshly brewed coffee every morning. The scent would usually reach my nostrils as soon as I near the kitchen door.

Today though, I had fully reached the kitchen doors but I still haven't smelled anything. I opened it and found no signs of Dianne. No neatly fixed hair in a bun. No freshly brewed coffee.

There was no Dianne.

"Where could she be?" I whispered unconsciously. It was not like her to leave without saying goodbye. She mostly would ask someone to tell me in case she couldn't inform me herself. It was very unusual for her to leave like that.

I started asking all the other servants at the manor, but all of them either denied seeing her or ignored my existence. Some even went as far as running away when they saw me coming.

I t was as if they were hiding something from me; something big. And the moment I find out what that big secret is, I could risk changing everything in this house.

Everything in the Vilgrain Manor.

Master Julianne.

It had crossed my mind to confront the young master. But what if everything that happened last night was just a figment of my wild imagination? What if it was all in my head? And the moment those words left my mouth to reach the young master's ears to confirm it, I would lose my head - either literally or out of embarrassment.

I don't know what came over me, but I went to the second person that popped in my head after Dianne. I breathed in a heavy sigh and knocked on the wooden oak doors.

"Who is it?" came the response on the other side.

"It is I master." I answered. "Elizabeth"

The door opened and I was abruptly pulled inside. He grabbed my arm and everything went as a blur. The only thing that clicked in my head was the sound of the door closing once I was fully inside, and trapped in between his arms.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Regan?" he whispered, his tone playful but his face having no hint of amusement. I debated whether to be scared or amused at the situation. He had trapped me in between his arms and the door, his breath brushing my face with the small distance between us. His eyes were fixated on mine, my body still regaining balance.

"You did it so many times I'm wondering if you are taking me for a fool." he whispered.

Something was off about him. He seems as if he's in pain, and that all of this teasing was just a mere act to cover what he was truly feeling. I can see right through him. I wanted him to tell me what he truly felt, to show me his deepest, darkest secrets.

I wanted him to trust me.

"What troubles you young master?"

"There!!! You did it again!!" he started pacing away and I finally let out the breath I was subconsciously holding in. I remained standing in my place, senses on full alert. I wasn't going to let my guard down on these kinds of situations. I know I was walking on thin ice but he was my friend, I wasn't going to back down just because I was afraid.

I watched him stop pacing, his head tilting up to stare at the ceiling. My body had relaxed a little seeing he had calmed down a bit.

"Why can't you just say my name?" he finally whispered, exasperated "It was always him!" His head lowered and he slowly, cautiously, walked towards me. His pace was slow and cautious, like he was giving me permission to leave if I wanted to, and I didn't want to. His hands raised and he got me caged, his arms on either side of my head to the door. We were back on the same position as before.

He pressed his forehead to mine and tears were falling relentlessly from his eyes. It flowed from his face and it felt like rain as it dropped at the back of my hand. I rotated my hand to catch it in my palm, and brought it to his face. I cupped his cheek and softly raised it to meet my gaze.

"What are these tears for Regan?" I kept my voice low; afraid he would break if I spoke any louder. It was like Dianne's voice when she comforts me of my troubles.

His tears kept on falling as he answered "I'm sorry Rose. I- I..." he repeated, over and over again. "I made a mistake .... It was a mistake- I... I would never hurt you- mistake-" he was just repeating the same phrase.

He was in a trance.

I gave his head a slight shake, my hands on either side of his face, cupping it softly as a means of support. "Regan? Regan! Snap out of it!" my face was dead serious. I was eager to get to the bottom of this, and put an end to all of the secrets that haunt the manor. "Calm down and tell me what is the matter."

"I killed someone Rose... I'm so sorry..." His eyes were wide as the tears kept flowing. "Killed someone... Murderer... I killed-" by this time, I wasn't sure if I felt safe being in the same room as him. A sliver of cold air enveloped my body as beads of sweat formed as he repeated those words.

By what seems like the hundredth time he said those words, I had enough. I wasn't going to fare well with Regan's madness any longer.

"Who?! Who was it Regan!?!?" I was frustrated and screaming as well. "Tell me the bloody hell who you killed Reg-!!"

I automatically shut my mouth. He looked me straight in the eye with such crazed eyes before he leaned in close as his lips brushed against my ear lobe, whispering.

"Your Julianne, Rosabelle"

It was all he said before a breath left his body, something of spirits leaving his being, his body falling to meet the hard surface of the ground as he lost consciousness. His body fell on a heap on my feet, the soft carpeted floors cushioning his fall. I remained standing, my eyes wide in realization.

"Regan,"

Why did it have to be him?

"No.... It can't be..." now it was I who was crazed. "you couldn't... wouldn't.."

He was the creature that killed the person that meant the world to me. My sweet Julliane. My beloved mate and fated other half. If what he said was true, then he was the beast that killed Julianne Vilgrain that night.

My Julianne.

My legs gave out and I fell to the carpeted floors with a soft thud. "It can't be true..." I whispered. It seems as though I had said it more to convince myself rather than believe it. My eyes slowly glazed over at Regan's unconscious form beside me. I brought him to my lap to cushion his head. Such a sweet, funny, arrogant, thoughtful Regan. It couldn't be you, can it? Though the memory of that one faithful night still haunted me, something wasn't fitting the puzzle.

Something wasn't right.

Facts like how he can remember these memories and I couldn't, how it seems as if he was feeling those emotions when he wasn't there, and how Julianne had not confronted me since that night at dinner. There were so many questions that haunted me. Questions that I was seeking answers to, but don't know where to start.

I feel as if I was left to my own demise.

We had stayed frozen in this position for quite some time now, I stunned, while Regan remained unmoving in my arms. He was still unconscious. The sweet blow of the wind coming from his open balcony door lightly brushed my face, as my hair slightly moved with the entering air. I could see the beautiful moon up above from my spot in its fullest. It shined so bright in the darkness of the night along with the stars decorating the lifeless abyss of uncertainty.

I felt the air shift around me. Something, or should I presume someone, had appeared in the balcony, it's figure outlined against the light of the full moon. It created a shadow that reached the tips of my feet, barely covering up to Regan's mid length. My hands tightened protectively around Regan.

"My sweet Rose." The figure cooed "You may come to me" the figure outstretched its hand towards me.

I knew that voice anywhere.

I stretched my hand towards his, aiming to hold his hand. "My sweet Rosabelle" My fingers were just a few more inches, so close to the figure's.

As I was ready to give out my hand, Regan had grabbed my hand and dragged it down.

"No Eli," he whispered hoarsely. He had finally regained consciousness, though his eyes remained closed. "Don't" he whispered. He wheezed out and coughed lightly, looking as if it hurt him to use his voice. He had gripped my hand and brought it firmly to his chest.

He was embracing it like a man's most prized possession.

"But he's-" I went to look at the figure again but it had already vanished. For all I know, it may have all happened in my head. But Regan's warm hands over mine had confirmed that it did, in fact, happen.

"What happened to me?" he asked. Confusion was painted evidently on his face, and his eyebrows knitted together. He had already sat upright, letting go of my hands in the process. I felt cold without his hands covering mine, but I tried to show as if it didn't affect me.

"You mean, you do not remember?" I inquired.

He remained quiet. His face scrunched up with concentration. He was trying hard to recall the previous events. Seeing him like this reminds me of a child.

Something clicked inside of him and his eyes widened in realization.

He went to lie down on the floor once more, landing with a soft thud as his body met the surface of the carpeted, marble floors once again. I went to lie down beside him, a small space separating our bodies.

A deafening silence fell upon us. No one dared to break the silence.

"You must know, that it does not change how I see you now..." I finally said after a while, "That wasn't you." I took a short breath and sighed heavily.

"That was never you at all." I finished with a whisper.

"Eli..." he placed his hands over his eyes, his frustration with himself growing with each passing moment. "I've been remembering bits and pieces Eli. You don't understand. How could you even say such words towards me?" he finished, his mouth left slightly agape. I turned my body towards him, my face inches from his, sideward.

His body turned until we were directly face to face. The open doors to the balcony provided a faint light from the moon above. His golden hair shined even brighter with the moon's rays reflecting on Regan's mass of curly locks. His eyes slowly opened, his long lashes softly brushing my forehead with our close proximity. He stared at my face and no one dared to utter a single word. It was like his stare was enough to tell me how he felt. The words he wanted to say, but couldn't, have reflected in his eyes. Wherein the master's green eyes reminded me of spring, Regan's blue ones reminded me of the sky.

The never ending stretch of the sea's reflection staring attentively at me whenever I spoke.

"I have loved you with my life when you were Rose" he chuckled humorlessly "Even though I have seen that he is still the one you favor, my heart continues to beat for you. I guess the gods have not favored me still in another lifetime." He looked me directly in the eye, "And now I'm starting to believe they never did."

"But I'll tell you a dear little secret Eli" he stared intensely at my eyes, his gaze boring into mine. "I love you more than ever now, as Elizabeth. And maybe the best favor was having the opportunity to meet you in this lifetime."

My eyes widened. Considering the state we were in, I thought I couldn't even do such a thing as blush out of a simple compliment, let alone a confession of love!

But I guess I was wrong. I guess I was still a kid inside.

I was left speechless. I stood up, and brushed imaginary dirt of my body in an attempt to lighten the mood. I knew nothing about what he has felt a long time ago, more so after meeting him after only a few weeks. I don't even know what I feel myself. I was always so sure that what he did was all teasing, and nothing more. I didn't even dare expect more, considering our status in life. I was but a mere servant in a manor, while he was one of noble blood. Such relationships could never be accepted in society.

There was also the fact that we haven't even known each other for more than a month. Though somehow, weirdly enough, I have this gut feeling like I've known him for far much longer. It was such a peculiar feeling I'm not able to explain.

"Who is this Rose you speak of?" I inquired. If my hunch was right, then I'll be damned.

I had to make sure. If I was- no... If I am Rose. I still feel her. Rosabelle. Her emotions, dreams. The love she felt for her family, the fear of dying. How she, no, how maybe I felt when my eyes met his.

"Even after I have confessed how I felt about you, you still inquire about Rose." He smiled and stood up facing me. He cupped my face tenderly with his right hand; abruptly breaking my train of thought "Is it not obvious Eli?" he stroked my face gently with the back of his hand. "Rose is you, or should I say, was"

"Ramses Olivia Seraphine Elizabeth." I muttered "Rose..." how could I have not seen it? It was practically staring me right in the face! Ramses Olivia Seraphine Elizabeth stood for Rose!

I was Rose...

I am Rosabelle Amarind Frasier.

Everything blurred as my mind felt like it was being pulled into oblivion. I refused to succumb to the darkness, but even then I knew it was futile.

I can't just black out again! Not when I was finally getting some answers...

Not when-

"No..." I muttered.

Last I heard was the faint thud of my body as it fell to meet the hard surface of the floor.

I fell into unconsciousness. I could faintly hear rustlings and mumbles in the background, but my mind couldn't even process them anymore.

I was already in oblivion.

I waited for the creature to devour me. My body shivered when the cold night air brushed against my skin.

I closed my eyes, praying for a painless death.

Just a few more moments in this world and I'll be with you, together forever, in our safe haven.

I waited for hours, but nothing came. Such a fool I was! I should go home to my family, I know that... But such great pain my heart carries that I will carry for such a lifetime. I simply cannot return....

What was I thinking? Had the creature found me unworthy of killing? Where was it?

"Rose. Are you okay?" a voice asked, I jumped in surprise.

The voice sounded raspy, but familiar. I opened my eyes to confirm.

"Hesediel." his name came off as a whisper. Then a sudden realization hit me.

The beast was still loose.

I couldn't risk losing another dear person to me; especially one who's always been there since childhood. Hesediel had always been there for me, and I couldn't bear it should something were to happen to him.

"What are you doing here!?! There's a beast on loose!"I rasped hurriedly, he lowered his gaze. "Hesediel! A beast!" I clung to him like a mad woman, shaking him both from my fear for him and myself.

"I know" he answered. He kept his gaze low, never meeting my eyes. Something wasn't right with Hesediel.

"Then what are you doing here!?" I screamed, exasperation evident in my tone "Staying here will only endanger your life-"

"I understand but- No Rose I-" he winced and pressed his arm on his abdomen and slightly shook. His body was unstable. I quickly aligned my body with his catching his heavy weight.

"Hesediel" I went to his side to support him "Are you hurt? Had the beast harmed you?!?"

He tried to stand "That is not of importance right now, what's important is for- argh!" he fell and clutched his leg. Hesediel was obviously in pain! I just stood there idiotically while I stared at his leg, noticing it swelling. A moment's deliberation had made me realize that scratches and wounds covered different parts of his body as well, though he obviously tried to hide it behind his thin clothing.

I was certain that his leg was broken; I wasn't a healer in our town for nothing. I know the difference between a fractured bone from a broken one, and his was obviously broken.

My body went cold and my skin went paler than the moon above. My trembling hand quickly shot up to cover my mouth as I suppressed a sob.

The Lycan that attacked moments ago had broken its leg upon his kick. I even heard it crack and whimper in pain.

It couldn't be, can it?

Maybe it was all just coincidence.

Yes, coincidence. My Hesediel is my Hesediel. But even then I knew, and so did my body as it continued to tremble.

My sweet Hesediel could never hurt a fly. He had always been there since we were young and stood up like a brother for me. But why is it that I couldn't shake the feeling off? The curiosity was kicking in my head again, and I always knew it never was a good thing. Damn this curiosity.

I almost feel like I have an obsession over knowing things around me.

I had to know.

"Were you the beast Hesediel?" I blurted, only realizing I did once it was out of my mouth. I kept my eyes leveled with his, my reflection staring me in his orbs. I was scared but I couldn't stop my mouth as the words spilled from my head. "Well? Are you!?!"

His eyes widened. A deafening silence followed. No one dared to utter a single word, as his head dropped down to fix his gaze upon the ground below. What was so interesting on the ground at a time like this!?!?

Moments of deafening silence after, it was followed by a deep sigh from him. He was going to spill.

"I- Rose, I-" he reached for my hand. "Let me explain! He-"

"It couldn't be, right? It was simply silly to even ask of me!" I tried to laugh it off but his expression said it all. "Right?" my voice had already cracked and had reduced to that of a mouse.

I was terrified.

"Rose..." he tried to reach for my hands but I denied his advances.

"Forget it. It was simply stupid of me to even ask." I whispered, as I cautiously stepped back, my legs threatening to fall any second.

"Rose it was..."

I slapped his hand away, afraid of contact. I continued to pace on wobbly legs.

"I said forget it!" I repeated louder. "You... Have no business here..."

Now I know. And it took for the cat in me to die to know that curiosity was never a good thing....

He looked me straight in the eye, body exhausted and slumped down on the ground.

"I am- the beast you spoke of." He answered, seemingly defeated and exhausted.

"You must understand Rose, I had done it to protect you!" he shouted, pleading me with those eyes of his that held a thousand emotions. I struggled to be angry with him, my sympathy was slowly overcoming the anger I was feeling whenever my eyes would catch a glimpse on one of his wounds.

I wanted to patch him up just to put my sympathy aside. I was too mellow when it came to Hesediel.

"How could you Hesediel! He was my mate! I had felt it when our eyes connected!" I, too, had shouted with exhaustion.

His eyes widened. Even he was shocked with this little piece of information.

He didn't know.

He did it to protect me, the voice in my head tried to reason out, he never wanted to hurt me.

At the cause of my mate, the other whispered. And by then all the pain I felt moments ago came crashing like a giant wave, overwhelming me with its suffocating grip in my chest.

I turned to leave but his hand kept me in place.

Don't Rose. Don't turn. Walk away.

"You do not understand...I love you Rose..."

Don't look back.

"I always had, I always have and- argh- I- always will."

I stopped dead in my tracks, my mouth basking in the salty taste of my tears. I humorlessly laughed; I could almost feel my sanity slowly slipping away, the tiny cracks in my mind giving away to insanity... Mother always says that when you find your mate, you'll be the happiest. So maybe, it was only natural to feel like a thousand stabs in the chest if you lose them...

I tried to muster the strongest voice I could at the moment, but it was still cracked.

I figure it will have to do. Anything to get me away from Hesediel at the moment.

My hands curled up into fists.

I gripped tighter that my knuckles had turned pale white. I breathed in a large amount of air before speaking.

"Speak not about love Hesediel....." I said. I can feel his hand tense around my wrist. It slightly loosened as he flinched at my words "You took away mine....."

"But Rose he-"

A sense of void was sucking me up like a black hole. I could feel myself coming back to consciousness, until there was a blinding white light.

So bright, I thought.

I woke up on a bed cocooned in layers upon layers of soft, silk linens and cotton covers, all splayed out in the mattress for my comfort. Rays of sunshine were sipping in between the small gaps from the curtains hitting me straight in the eyes. My eyes squinted with the contact.

I just came from sleeping but my body felt like it had been up all night. Even with the comfort of this marvelous bedding, my body was still sore.

How peculiar.

My eyes observed my surroundings. This wasn't my bed and this certainly isn't my walls.

In fact, this wasn't my room at all! 

Where in God's green Earth am I?!?!