Smiling through the window at the table I'm not wanted at.
Sitting in isolation, while you guys sit in the sun.
Crying myself to sleep, while you dream sweetly.

I fight my demons alone, with a blunt sword, while you pull the blinds on the glass I look through so you don't have to watch.

I'm always there to aid you in your fight, even when you say it's not enough. Even when you say I don't even see the monsters.

But, I've lived on the outside. I know all of it. And fighting it alone, shouldn't be an option.

I can't keep fighting though. I've been knocked down a lot. By the monsters, some mine, some yours.

Sometimes, you.

And every time I'm reminded I have to fight, alone..it's harder to stand up. And then I have to fight your monsters too, and it's virtually impossible.

Sometimes you ask if I need help, but that creates more monsters for me, because you can't be away from the comfort inside for too long.

Can't say I blame you, it's always looked so nice from the outside looking in.

I don't suppose I'll ever know myself.

Sometimes you open the window, which is nice, but you don't really like the outside air, so it doesn't stay open.

I've ventured away from the window lately getting blueprints on how one is made. I suppose I should find my own glass. Even if, it means doing it alone.

It's not like I'm not used to that.

I was running today, and I ran into your glass, leaving a spiderweb crack in the pane, and also breaking my nose.

We disagree about which damage is worse.

I was running from my monsters again. But, you tell me all about how I've neglected to take care of yours.

I'm crying, because of your glass that's only gotten harder to break through, hard to even see inside of anymore. I wonder if you've screwed it shut by now. It's perfect, but somehow I found a way to ruin it, by trying to find a place inside.

It won't happen again.

I'll make sure if I ever have my own window, it's far away from yours. Wouldn't wanna catch myself still, after everything still glancing into yours.

I can't keep trying to be a part of a world that doesn't even realize how far gone I am from them.