They had been on the road for hours now, finally working their way out of the city and into the darkness. Elliot had nearly had a stroke when she'd mentioned that they were going all the way towards the southern border of New Jersey, and not just slightly out of town as she had previously insinuated. Now he understood why they'd left quite a while before and not just the day of.

Soon enough, his headlights were some of the only illumination on the roads. The city was fading in their rearview mirror. Buildings turned into trees and silence had replaced honking horns and roaring engines.

He heard the distinct sound of a flicking lighter. Twisting his neck to look at her, he saw her with a cigarette hanging between her lips as she lit the end of it. An incredulous look stole his expression.

"What?" she asked, finally taking the first inhale. She blew it out the side of her lips in the cracked window, keeping eye contact with him. "It's not like I'm pregnant or anything."

"Olivia! That's not funny," he scolded, forcing his eyes back on the road.

A moment of silence fell on them before the sound of the lighter replaced the small sounds of her giggles. "It's a little funny."

"No, it's not," he readjusted his grip on the steering wheel with agitation. "I agreed to help you, but I didn't agree to the jokes about... this."

The side eye he gave her was a little unnerving, but she wasn't too perturbed by it.

Her head fell back against the seat and she rolled her eyes so hard she almost saw her brain. "It's how I cope, Elliot. Am I, a woman in deep peril, not allowed to have my humor? I'm barely allowed to have an abortion, the least I could be granted is some laughter."

He squirmed in his seat. Apparently he was only ready to laugh about things that didn't pertain to the exact reason they were in the car. "Aren't you the least bit uncomfortable with this situation, Liv?"

"Of course I am!" she replied, taking another drag from the cigarette. "You know, you men like to make this out to be something fun for us. As if we just hop on over to the clinic and then get mimosas after like nothing ever happened. Typical testosterone. It's not like changing a tampon, Elliot. I'm not having fun."

"Well, you're cracking jokes like you're on your way to Six Flags!" he argued back. "You don't seem all that upset."

"You want me to cry?" she deadpanned. "Here, hand me your rosary, I'll say my prayers and beg for absolution if it'll calm you down. It's my immortal soul we have to worry about."

That finally broke the smallest of smiles on his face. "I don't have a rosary, Olivia," he tried to say without laughing.

"You got any of them swanky candles with the saints on them? You know, the real tall ones that they sell in Spanish Harlem?" she asked, sliding back in her seat and resting her feet on the dashboard.

"No," he chuckled again. "I don't have any of those on me at the moment. My apologies for not packing those and my entire seminary for the trip."

"Damnit!" she sank back down once more, not realizing she had risen in the first place. "Well, then I guess I'm doomed, huh? At least some of those pretty sick serial killers from Dateline will be in Hell to keep me company."

He paused for a moment, all humor dropping out of him. "Do... do you really think you're going to Hell?"

"No," she answered back, not bothering to look back at him as she continued puffing the cigarette. "But you do."

It was a statement, and one that didn't sit right with him. She had automatically assumed that he had branded her with a scarlet letter. The worst part was that she seemed to be at peace with how he perceived her. "I don't think that..."

She hummed, her head lolling from one shoulder to the other. "I guess you don't... we've been in the car for this long and you haven't even tried to change my mind yet."

"I'm not gonna try to change your mind. I don't like what you're doing but it's not my choice. It's not my kid, it's not my body." He glanced over at her, taking his eyes off of the road. "Only you know what's best for you."

"Wow," she breathed, feigning shock. "Maybe it is your immortal soul we have to worry about."

___

"Jesus, Elliot. You drive like a grandmother!" Olivia snarked, taking a loud slurp from the extra large slushie she had gotten from the gas station. "There's nobody out here and you're acting like it's a fucking school zone. Put the pedal to the metal."

"In case you weren't aware, I've never been to this side of Jersey before," he grumbled. "I don't know my way, and all you have are some shitty printed map directions. So, pardon me for taking my sweet ass time to make sure we don't end up lost, or worse, in Philly."

She slurped again, even louder as she started to reach the bottom of the cup. "Just go south, it's not that hard. You've got a full tank of gas, thanks to moi, don't be afraid to use it. We won't get lost."

"I'm going the speed limit because, unlike you, I don't drive like I'm in NASCAR." He shifted in his seat, resting his head in the hand that wasn't on the wheel. "Plus, deer cross the roads out here. It's not like driving in the city."

"Tell me about it!" she huffed. "When I drive in the city, I'm ready and willing to hit a couple of jaywalkers. I drive like one of those racing games at the arcade because I've got places to be!"

"Famous last words of someone convicted of vehicular manslaughter," he rolled his eyes at her. "I can't afford to lose my windshield to a fucking buck who thought the road was a running track. That, and nobody even knows where we are! If we flip this car and end up in a ditch, we're coyote jerky."

"Oh please," she snorted, a familiar sign that she was ready to continue teasing him. "C'mon Mister God Squad, drive like Jesus took the wheel. Nothing can hurt you with the Holy Spirit in your heart!"

Both of his hands were back on the wheel and white-knuckling it. He was growing tired of the jabs and fun she was poking at him. He ground down his jaw, feeling the adrenaline start to rush through him. "Oh, so you want me to drive like this?"

Olivia's eyes widened as he started to press down on the gas. She leaned over and watched the speedometer as it rose. First it was five miles above the limit, then ten, then twenty five, and by the time he was going 80 in a 50, she was actually panicking.

"Okay, Elliot. You've made your point," she warned, grabbing the handle above her head. Nothing changed other than the sound of his motor speeding faster. "Seriously, dude! Knock it off!"

"No!," he shouted. "You wanted fast, let's fucking go fast! You live your life on the edge, might as well embrace it!" he called out over the roar of the vehicle. He was about to floor the pedal when an array of flashing red and blue lights appeared in his rearview mirror. "Shit, shit, shit!"

"Oh, great! Look what you've done now!" Olivia yelled, angrily slumping back in her seat as Elliot slowed the car down.

"Fuck! My dad's gonna kill me!" Elliot cried out, veering off to the shoulder of the road before putting the car in park. All that ran through his head was how fucking unfair it was. Olivia broke the rules every minute of the day and rarely faced consequences. The moment he tried to prove a point, he got caught.

Elliot turned the car off and scrubbed his face with his palms before rolling down the window. "Just don't say anything, okay? Let me handle this. You've done enough,"

The officer bent down, peering his head into the car where the two teenagers stared at him like deer in headlights. "Evening, kids," he nodded curtly. "Sir, are you aware you were speeding?"

"Officer, I apologize. I know it's late, I lost track of—"

"Oh my god!" Olivia cried from the seat beside him, pulling the attention of both the cop and Elliot. "Jesus, oh shit! God, Elliot, it hurts!" She clutched her stomach, her eyes screwing shut as she writhed.

Elliot nearly jumped out of his skin. "Liv, what's wrong? What is it?" he pleaded, receiving no answer.

"I can't! It hurts, please!" she cried louder. "Shit! Elliot, help me!"

"Ma'am, take a deep breath and tell me where the pain is coming from." The cop asked, sticking his head in closer towards the rolled down window.

"Jesus Christ! She's uh — she's pregnant, Officer." Elliot scrambled as he reached over towards her, moving to put his palm on the back of her head. "Liv, talk to me, what's wrong?"

"It's like a stabbing pain!" she bellowed with tears falling from her eyes, "Please, take me to the hospital!"

"Okay, uh —" Elliot looked back at the cop, panic pleading in his eyes.

"I can call dispatch for an ambulance or I can escort you there," the officer added, trying to get a better view of Olivia as she groaned and sobbed.

"No! Please, can he just take me to the hospital!" she cried louder, as if a large wave of pain hit her once more. "No ambulance, no escort, I don't wanna do that, I just wanna go to the hospital!"

The cop glanced between the two of them, pondering for a moment on what to do. He realized right away how young they were, and he figured that her pleas to be left to their own devices was due to not wanting anyone to find out. "Alright, kid. You know where the hospital is? It's right on the route you were going, just keep going straight for a few more miles. Can you do that?"

"Uh — yes, sir!" Elliot responded, his head whipping back and forth between the two of them. "I'm sorry for speeding, sir. Truly, it was an honest mistake."

"Don't worry about it, just get your girlfriend to the hospital. Be careful, alright? And no more speeding!" The cop patted the top of Elliot's Jeep before heading back to his squad car. The Jeep roared back to life as they watched the flashing lights fade away.

Olivia's cries continued until there wasn't a drop of red or blue light in the sky. As Elliot panicked, frantically trying to pull off the side of the road, he realized there was a sudden silence. He looked over to see as Olivia settled back down into her seat, her face contorting into a smirk.

Elliot stared at her with a dumbfounded expression. "Wh-what? What the hell was that? Are you alright?"

"Phew, that one week I spent cleaning up after the drama club for detention really paid off!" she laughed, pointing her finger at how shocked he looked. "You fell for that - hook, line, and sinker!"

"What the fuck, Olivia!" he yelled, his chest rising and falling dramatically as he fought to catch his breath. "You scared the shit out of me! I - Jesus, I thought you were dying or something!"

"Nah," she sighed, "but I do have to pee really bad though. I should not have drank all of that slushie." She reached down, nonchalantly palming where her bladder ached. "I had a packet of ketchup locked and loaded if he was gonna give us a harder time, but he folded like a freaking towel!"

His jaw was dropped and showed no signs of lifting any time soon. "You... you are a sociopath!"

"I got you out of a ticket! You're welcome!" she exasperated. "But no, seriously though, Elliot. I really need to pee. This whole expanding uterus is not doing my bladder any good, so find me a bathroom or find me a cup before it finds your fabric seat." She looked over at him with a dead serious face. "Really, I will piss on your seat."

He groaned and rolled his eyes as he got back on the road. "Well," he started off calmly. "Now we know the nearest bathroom is probably the hospital!"

"Perfect! I got you out of a ticket and found a bathroom!" she laughed. "We killed two birds with one stone! There's a joke somewhere in there but I'm not gonna say it because you don't appreciate my gallows humor."

"Thank God," he mumbled.

"Don't thank God. He didn't do shit to get you out of that ticket. I did. Thank me instead."