A/N: Hi everyone! Better late than never, I guess. This was a bit longer (God, what happened to my promise of keeping chapters short?!?!) but I felt I couldn't finish it with just the earlier scenes. I needed to close this issue before we move on to new complications in Luke and Max's lives.

Have fun reading!

***

I had just applied a purplish black mud mask on my face when my cell phone started to ring with a number I didn’t know.

I was in pajamas with my hair in a braid, steeping my tea and doing a little calming night ritual to right all the things that went wrong tonight in some way. 

It was nearly midnight but it took a while for me to wind down after I got home—to empty myself of feelings I had no business feeling. Well, except for being pissed off with Luke because I was entitled to that. Whoever he was with didn’t matter. He shouldn’t have stood me up like that.

I didn’t cry or bring home a bottle of tequila or crumple in a sobbing heap on the bathroom floor. There were other truly devastating things in life—being disappointed by a guy one should’ve suspected all along to be capable of it wasn’t one of them.

I didn’t like answering phone calls from people I didn’t know especially since most of them tended to be a telemarketer so I let the phone ring and boy, did it ever ring. 

It was like my poppy ringtone on a manic loop that I was sure to have last-song syndrome for the next century.

It was fun at first until it drove me crazy so I put it on mute and cranked up the volume of the CSI episode I was starting my possible TV marathon with.

I had just curled up in my couch when someone rapped quite aggressively on my door.

“Who is it?” I asked as I put the TV on mute and walked up to the door. My only answer was another nasty knock.

I had a pretty good feeling who was on the other side.

The door didn’t have a peephole but it had a chain so I cranked it open slightly.

Luke’s face appeared in the small strip of space, dark and brooding. 

“Hey,” I said feebly, not because I didn’t know what to say to him (I actually had a few choice words on reserve) but mostly because my face was stiff from the mask that it took some effort to loosen up my cheeks.

“Can I come in so we can talk?” he asked, not even blinking at the sight of me. 

“No,” I said. “You’ve wasted enough of my night. But thanks for inviting me to Peggy’s party. It was, hmm, enlightening at the very least.”

He just looked even grimmer. “Why won’t you answer my calls?”

“Which calls?” 

“The ones I’ve been making in the last fifteen minutes,” he said in exasperation. “Do you know how hard it is to actually buy a cell phone at this time of the night, no matter how much money you offer someone to open a damn store for you?”

I blinked in surprise. “Um, no, not really because I don’t tend to buy things with the snap of my fingers and actually expect them to materialize out of thin air.”

He didn’t find that amusing. “Then I had to track down a few different people so I could get your number.”

“You could’ve asked Ryan for it.”

“I would’ve but Ryan’s number, along with yours and several other people, were all in my old cellphone which probably still litters the VIP lounge in Haneda Airport in small bits and pieces after it was smashed on the floor and pounded into with a six-inch high heel shoe.”

He looked pretty mad and I shouldn’t be amused by it but it made me feel a little bit better.

“Sounds like there’s a pretty interesting backstory to that unfortunate accident,” I commented dryly.

“There is,” Luke said. “One I’d be happy to tell you about in full detail if you’d just let me come in and fix this.”

“There’s nothing to fix.”

He shook his head. “Don’t lie, Max. I know how badly I bungled up tonight.”

I raised a brow. “You just stood me up, no big deal. Although, if you wanted to bring a different date, you could’ve just said so.”

His eyes flickered with some emotion I didn’t catch fast enough. “So it was a date then?”

I glared. “You know what I mean.”

He smiled fleetingly. “I’m starting to realize, Max, and quickly, that you’ll always be ahead of me and I’ll always just be trying to keep up.”

“Patronizing me isn’t going to make up for it, Luke.”

He didn’t even blink when he responded in a heartbeat. “I’m not patronizing you and trust me, I’m prepared to grovel at this point. Just say the word.”

I studied him for a minute, wondering what to do next.

“What happened to Terrence’s phone?” I asked. “You could’ve texted me through it.”

Luke grimaced. “It also suffered an irrecoverable mishap. It drowned in a hot cup of coffee.”

I rolled my eyes. “Might be time to contemplate the company you keep, Luke.”

His brows furrowed. “I don’t have to. I know whose company I prefer.”

I inwardly bristled. 

So he had choices. Should I just embrace my destiny as one of his choices? Didn’t I get a choice about being a choice? A bit of an absurd logic, I know, but it was something I realized as a kid when I lost both my parents. It was never enough to choose people—they had to choose you, too. You might want to stay forever but that meant nothing if they want to walk away.

“I do, too, and the company I prefer tonight is that of myself,” I said, looking at him straight in the eye, struggling with a surge of bitterness that conflicted with my urge to open the door fully and let him in. “I’m tired, Luke, and my face is about to crack open here so I have to go. And honestly, from the sound of it, you still have plenty of overseas baggage to sort through, if you know what I mean.”

He knew. I could see it in the way his eyes darkened, in the way his jaw clenched.

“You’re right,” he bit out. 

I managed a small smile but it probably looked like a sneer because I couldn’t move my face too well. “Goodnight, Luke.”

“Goodnight, Max.”

He offered no resistance when I closed the door. 

It wasn’t easy because it felt as heavy as my heart right now.

It was heavy, but at least it wasn’t broken.

***

I spent the entire weekend keeping busy. 

I scrubbed down my entire apartment, went for a walk downtown and wandered around the park and hung out with Jillian at her place, baking cookies. I didn’t want to be moping around in case Luke showed up at my apartment again but that was a useless worry because he didn’t come calling the entire weekend. 

On Monday, when Jillian and I were having lunch at a cafe two blocks from work, we found an article on one of the local scandal sheets about Lola Lincoln’s passionate reunion with Luke Hedenby, heir to the Hedenby empire. It wasn’t a headliner but they did have a grainy shot of the two getting out of the car at the fanciest hotel in town. 

The flash washed up her face too much but she was making no effort at concealing her identity since she was beaming at the camera. I could see a generous cascade of reddish blond hair spilled over the luxurious white trench coat she wore. It was left open in front, exposing a short, silky dress inside. She was tall and slim with the skin and bone structure of a goddess. Next to her though was a dark-faced Luke who’d turned his face slightly away from the camera which mostly captured his stony profile. His eyes were hard and flinty, his jaw tense. I almost couldn’t imagine that the same man had been grinning crookedly at me last Sunday, with his eyes bright and happy as we wrestled for his cellphone in bed.

At the reminder of our better times, I felt the jab harder in my gut. 

This was Luke’s real life. 

I was just a passing distraction.

“I bet those boobs are fake,” Jillian offered as she looked over the picture, wisely saying very little when I first picked it up. “They’re too perfectly round.”

I skimmed the article quickly, not really seeing the words, and shrugged as casually as I could even when a slow, bitter ache had begun inside of me. “I’m sure they’re not what Luke sees when he looks at her. I’m sure he only sees her beautiful heart somewhere between those perfect globes.”

Jillian chortled. “Well, damn. You’re only slightly ticked off, aren’t you? That was polished but insulting.”

I folded the paper and set it aside before casually taking a sip of my coffee. “You’re right. I need to reserve my creative brain activity for more worthwhile things.”

“Mean and highly discouraged laughter aside, do you actually want to talk about this?” she asked, a hint of seriousness in her tone. “I know you and Mr. H were kind of getting close but then I see this and I’m suddenly not sure.”

Jillian didn’t know what happened on Friday night and I didn’t think it mattered if she did. It was Luke’s boo-boo, and mine, too, because I let him make it. 

“I think the talk we had about it in those first few days when I started hanging out with Luke still covers it,” I told her, wanting the topic of Luke closed. “You don’t have to warn me of anything new.”

Jillian got the hint, had the decency not to say ‘I told you so’, and moved on to chatter about something else.

We were sipping on iced coffees walking back into the office when we ran into Luke.

He had just come out of the elevator and stopped when he saw us. 

“Hey,” he greeted, lifting a hand to give a small, awkward wave. He was surprisingly scruffy, his hair messier than usual.

“Hey, Mr. H,” Jillian greeted back brightly.

When I just slurped loudly on my iced coffee and said nothing, Jillian peered at me and not-so-quietly asked, “Oh. Are we not talking to Mr. H? ‘Coz I can totally get on board with that.”

Luke’s forehead scrunched up at that.

“I’m not talking to him,” I clarified with a hitch of my shoulder. “You can talk to him all you like.”

Luke sighed and gave Jillian a pained smile. “She’s mad at me.”

“No shit,” Jillian said with a mild snort. 

“Any recommendations on how I can undo the damage?” he asked her with all seriousness.

Jillian tipped her head up and looped her arm with mine as if in preparation to steer me away and toward the elevator. “Just two simple ones.”

“What’s that?”

“Say you’re sorry like you really mean it,” she said. “And don’t be a dumbass and do it again.”

I fought to hid my smile. Even if Luke and I were somewhat friends, I wouldn’t quite say the things Jillian said. But then, I couldn’t quite get away with them like she could.

Luke smiled, in spite of himself, and nodded. “Good advice, Ms. Dane. I will take it into serious consideration.”

“Good,” she said with a broad smile. She was totally having a good time with this. “See you around, Mr. H.”

He nodded again, his eyes catching mine just before Jillian pulled me away.

He looked lonely, or maybe it was just my imagination because I wanted him to feel lonely. I’d like to think I wasn’t suffering this rift alone but at the memory of that article, of his arm around Lola’s slender waist, that wasn’t likely the case.

He wasn’t lonely.

He had Lola.

***

It started inconspicuously enough. 

The next morning, as I was walking to the bus stop, I spotted one of the baristas at Cleo’s cheerfully inviting people over for a Free Coffee Morning. I was a near regular at the cafe so it was no surprise when she recognized me and beckoned me over. There was an impressive line at the till already and I didn’t really think I had time to wait if I wanted to catch my bus so I smiled apologetically and shook my head. I was going to just go but she grabbed me by the wrist and practically dragged me inside. 

“Do you want the usual today?” she asked and pretty much in the same second I nodded, she slipped back behind the bar where other baristas were busy already doing one free order of coffee after another. 

I glanced at my watch and decided I had five minutes and nothing more. I wasn’t really sure what she was doing because I couldn’t see her behind the others from where I was standing but I didn’t want to be rude and just leave after she’d pulled me inside. I had a feeling she was making me a free coffee but I didn’t want to cut in line—not that many were looking grim while waiting. Cleo’s was an iconic local cafe and every coffee they crafted was always high-quality. To get it free on a random morning was the kind of golden opportunity you were happy to have just been dragged into.

I stood on my toes and craned my neck to see if I could spot my barista but I wasn’t very tall and my angle was bad. Then she pretty much appeared right under my nose, holding out a coffee tray with two cups of coffee in it. Instantly, I knew that one was my usual and the other was Jillian’s. 

“Enjoy the coffee and the rest of your day!” was all she said as she beamed at me.

I couldn’t help but grin back. “Thank you so much! And I will definitely enjoy my day. You, too! Even if it gets crazy busy with all these people wanting free coffee!”

I smiled and waved at her one last time before heading out.

Jillian was ecstatic when I dropped off her coffee and my own tasted like perfection so I was off to a really good start. Turned out I needed the caffeine because Bryce, the director of the marketing department, pulled names out of a hat, including mine, for the lucky, or not so lucky ones, who would have to work the fundraiser dinner the company was hosting this weekend. As part of the new brand mandates that came about after Luke took the reins when his father decided to focus on their banking and finance branch, the company was integrating itself into many community-centered projects in every town and city where it operated. With the headquarters being here, the marketing and public affairs teams were busier than ever seeking out partnerships with both private and public sectors to spearhead projects that supplied opportunities to residents and supported the growth of the local economy. This weekend, we were doing an auction dinner for a variety of privileged interactions with the professional hockey home team. The company was going to double the total funds raised which will then go toward the city’s supportive housing projects designed to shelter the homeless. 

I didn’t mind these events at all and in the four months since I started working for the company, I’d participated in a couple of them. They were always glitzy but for a good cause. The only downside was that they were a lot of work for the organizers, especially when Theodora was appointed to lead as she loved to power trip on everyone else. As the junior staff, we were dumped an assortment of jobs with little to no time to pull them off properly and some could be glamorous, some gritty. I was Theodora’s favorite slave so I almost always got the worst tasks. I was already dreading having to do all kinds of things—from printing table name cards to wrapping thank-you tokens to vacuuming confetti from the floor when the event was over and we were packing up. The rest of the week was definitely going to be sheer hell.

Later that day, while I was doing the tedious job of checking the long guest list for spelling errors instead of having lunch, a high stack of freshly baked pizza arrived in our department. Everyone cheered and dug in. I was so hungry I was just happy to stuff my face with a giant slice of pizza and ask no questions.

Then even later, much to my surprise, Peggy swung by with a small tray of cupcakes—most of them mint chocolate ones which coincidentally were my favorite. At first she claimed that she was just bringing in some thank-you treats to the people who showed up at her party. Then as she was on her way out, she turned around and came back to my desk, saying in a low murmur, “He’s suffering quite sufficiently, I’d say. When you’re up for it, maybe take him out of his misery.”

I just smiled, thanked her and picked up a cupcake.

I finished my day a little later than usual and as I was walking down the front steps, a familiar car pulled up in front. Terrence smiled and waved hello, telling me to hop in and he’ll give me a ride home. I paused, which was apparently my giveaway because he immediately assured me that Luke wasn’t with him. He’d just come to the office to pick up something and was heading back. 

“You’re that mad at him, huh?” he asked when I finally relented and slipped into the front seat.

I should’ve known that getting into the car meant I was inviting a conversation about Luke.

“No, not really,” I said with a sigh. “I’m not mad at him. Anger might be a tad bit overdone. I’m just pissed off at him. And disappointed.”

Terrence winced. “That’s probably worse. When you’re mad, you can vent until it goes away. When you’re disappointed, well, you’re just going to turn around and walk away.”

I just shrugged, hoping that we wouldn’t have to talk more about Luke because the more I thought about this stupid rift, the more I was starting to resent it. 

“If it helps to know, Lola’s appearance at Peggy’s party wasn’t planned,” Terrence added. “She, uh, invited herself over, like she did with the flight back from Tokyo. She’s very pushy.”

“And Luke, given their history, is very accommodating, of course,” I said before I could stop the words. 

Damn. What happened to not wanting to talk about it any further?

Curiosity was what was happening to it. 

There was more to what happened on Friday night and despite myself, I was tempted to find out. The only thing stopping me was the fact that to know more was to become more invested. Friday night warned me that obviously, I felt more strongly than what was smart. I didn’t need more reasons to tighten that trap around my own heart. 

“Luke’s pretty easygoing that he sometimes doesn’t realize he’s being taken advantage of,” Terrence said. “Or that an act of goodwill could lead to disastrous consequences.”

I smiled a little. “I think we’ve all wielded good intentions with a wobbly hand at some point and hit someone else instead.”

Terrence chuckled. “I’m not sure Luke’s problem is a wobbly hand. I think he’s just starting to realize there is now someone he could hurt.”

I bit my lip and said nothing, even though the stretch of silence that followed Terrence’s statement was probably full of more meaning than anything I could say at this moment.

Thankfully, Terrence was willing to leave it at that—at least until we pulled up in front of my apartment.

“Max?”

“Yeah?”

“I know it’s not my place to ask you this at all but I promised him I would try,” he said, taking a deep breath as if he were about to say something he didn’t really want to say. 

“What is it?”

“Will you at least give him a chance to explain?” he asked.

I scratched my head. “Does it really matter at this point what the explanation is?”

Terrence’s gaze was direct when he pointedly said, “Of course, it matters. Without one, you are both going to tell yourselves things to substitute the truth and go your different ways never knowing if what you didn’t say to each other could’ve kept you together.”

“There is no together here, Terr. He and I aren’t like that and you know it,” I argued gently. 

He raised a brow. “I suspect some of us probably know more than the two of you do. If this explanation didn’t matter, you wouldn’t be this reluctant and he wouldn’t be this desperate.”

That struck a cord, more than I’d like to admit.

I sighed. “How about this, Terr? When I can afford distractions again that won’t cost me my job, and when I’ve stewed long enough about it, I’ll consider it, okay? Right now, I have a very full plate at work and the last thing I want is drama with a man who happens to be my boss.”

He smiled. “Alright. Sounds fair. Stew on.”

I laughed and said goodbye before slipping out of the car.

I brought home some work because we just absolutely had no time to cram everything we needed to do in the few days we had left in the week so I dined on ramen and worked through the evening. For the first time, I welcomed the preoccupation of working at home because it took up time I couldn’t devote to the growing complexity that was Luke Hedenby.

The next day, I headed to work early even though I was short on sleep and exhausted.

I skipped breakfast and was absently sipping my now-cool cup of work coffee when Jillian showed up carrying a big brown bag from Cleo’s including a proper coffee. 

I wasn’t surprised at Jillian bringing me coffee but the brown bag she dropped off at my desk before promptly taking off was big enough to supply me a week’s worth of food.

Frowning, I poked my head into it, breathing in the buttery scents of freshly baked croissants and pastries. Then I spotted a small, folded note inside it.

You can be mad all you like but you have to eat. There should be enough here to snack on if you skip lunch again. Don’t give it away. I’ll know and I’ll come down and carry you to a restaurant until you’re properly fed. -L

I was very tempted to write Luke an email and tell him I was giving all his food away but I didn’t. Because once I emailed him, he would want to talk and I was too conflicted to talk at this point. 

So I gorged on some croissants instead, saving the rest for later.

But apparently, despite my stash of food, I wasn’t going to be allowed to skip lunch. 

Ryan and Jill came over with one of my favorite wraps from a sandwich place we’d gone to before and a tall, cool fruity drink. 

“Did he put you up to this?” I asked bluntly.

They just looked at each other and feigned innocence, except for Jillian’s comment: “I have a feeling that if you don’t forgive him soon, you’re going to gain a few hundred pounds. He’s got the thing in reverse. The way to a woman’s heart isn’t typically through her stomach.”

“When you’re full, you think happy thoughts,” Ryan said. “When you’re happy, you’re more charitable. When you’re more charitable, you’re likely to forgive whatever Luke fucked up.”

“I don’t need more food,” I grumbled even as I took a hearty bite of the wrap. “A simple, old-fashioned apology would do.”

They soon left me in peace. Well, I wasn’t exactly feeling peaceful. I was half-amused, half-infuriated with Luke’s outrageous and excessive tendencies.

He was going to get sick and tired of it soon, I was sure, so I just had to wait him out.

But around early afternoon, after I came back from a restroom break, a small, bright red paper crane was sitting on my desk. Looking around, no one acted out of the ordinary to clue me in on who could’ve put it there.

Nestled between the wings of the paper crane was a small, folded note.

I’m more sorry than I can ever say.

I had to smile. I even tucked his note in my purse.

Since Friday, this was the first time he actually said ‘I’m sorry.’ 

I contemplated sending him a note back but I had no time because Theodora came to my desk and told me I needed to pick up the three-hundred plus or so monogrammed mini hockey pucks and commemorative jerseys from the supplier if we didn’t want to wait until tomorrow afternoon for them to be delivered. The warehouse was only just ten minutes outside of the city.

I opened my mouth to tell her I had no car to do the errand but she darted off when I took a second longer to form the sentence I never got to say. I probably shouldn’t have taken the effort to make the statement sound more HR-friendly.

Taking initiative instead, I grabbed the purchase order papers for it and headed down to facilities to see if they could point me to whoever was in charge of the fleet of corporate cars I knew we had somewhere lying around Hedenby Towers.

I didn’t hear someone calling my name at first because I was marching forward and frantically trying to turn off the speaker on my cellphone’s GPS that was dictating directions to the warehouse to me after I accidentally activated the navigation feature on it. 

It was only when Luke grabbed me by the elbow that I realized he’d been sprinting down the entire hallway based on the trail of people stopped in their tracks trying to properly greet him as he passed them.

“Hey,” he said, his hand still warm on my elbow. 

I blinked, caught off guard by his bright blue eyes gazing down at me that I absently let him steer us into a quieter corner. “Hey.”

“After two hundred yards, turn right.”

We both stared at the cellphone in my hand and I cursed at the reminder that the GPS was still trying to navigate.

“Little piece of crap,” I muttered as I tapped relentlessly on the button on the screen that I was hoping would silence the damned thing. “It won’t shut up. It’s like it’s possessed.”

“Hmm, let me see,” Luke said as he gently plucked the device out of my hand and tapped on the screen thoughtfully. The female computerized voice was cut short as it was telling me to take the exit to ninety-first street. Smiling, he handed it back to me. “There you go.”

“Thank you,” I mumbled, looking away in slight embarrassment as I slipped the phone back into the pocket of my blazer. “I can’t drive with this thing yelling out directions so I guess I’m going to have to print out a map.”

“Where are you going?”

“Cloverdale—it’s a small business park just outside of the city,” I said as I resumed my walk to facilities. Luke kept in stride with me. “I have to pick up the thank-you tokens for the hockey auction dinner this weekend. Based on the purchase order, I’m looking at about three large boxes and two smaller ones so I think I can manage with a car instead of a van, don’t you think?”

Luke’s brows furrowed. “Why are you the one picking it up? Don’t we pay for delivery?”

“They’re not scheduled to deliver until late tomorrow,” I answered. “They’re just about done producing them today and packing them up. They still need to be wrapped so we need all the time we can get.”

“But you don’t drive,” he pointed out.

I smiled. “I don’t here but I know how to. I drove my grandpa’s Plymouth all over town for years and that thing is the size of a small boat. I could even back it into a spot.”

Luke grinned. “I’d like to see that one day. But for now, let me help. I can drive you.”

I halted. “Um, probably not the best idea. For one, I’m still not sure I want to talk to you just yet and two, aren’t you the boss of this entire company which means you probably have bigger responsibilities than fetching a bunch of gift merchandise?”

His eyes instantly dimmed. “I have a pretty flexible schedule. And as for not talking to me, I’m going to do my best to convince you otherwise in however long it takes us to run this errand.”

I shook my head. “Right now’s not the time for this.”

“There will never be a right time as long as you’re angry at me,” he said through gritted teeth. 

When I said nothing, he exhaled loudly and ran a hand through his hair. “I can’t stand this, Max. I don’t know how you can.”

“I just don’t think about it,” I reluctantly answered. 

“Oh, yeah?” he asked. “How’s that working out for you?”

Not well but it’s the best it’s going to be right now.

“Alright, I promise not to pressure you,” he relented, holding both his hands up. “I won’t even talk about it if you don’t want to. But let me help you, okay? I can drive, lift, whatever you need.”

Resigned to the fact that the quickest way would probably just to indulge Luke rather than argue with him, I said fine and made my way down to facilities with Luke at my heels.

They pointed me to the office of the fleet manager who was off for the day. A bored-looking assistant  with the name tag Fred was there instead to bear me the bad news.

“If you don’t carry a corporate vehicle operation certificate, that usually means you don’t have an up-to-date driving record on file which means you can’t drive a company car. That’s the policy. Have a nice day,” he said with barely a glance at me as he continued to rap at his keyboard. From where I stood, I could see that he was playing some kind of block puzzle game.

I glanced at Luke who stood next to me with his arms crossed, looking quite unimpressed. 

“Are you even going to bother to check if she has one on file?” he asked.

I leaned toward him a little and mumbled under my breath, “I know I don’t so I’ll just take a cab and expense it.”

But he ignored me and stepped closer to the desk but Fred didn’t even blink in his direction. 

Yeah, that’s a career-limiting move there, buddy.

“How about me? Can I drive? I don’t have the certificate either,” Luke asked.

Fred raised a brow from under his glasses, eyeing Luke with a hint of impatience. “Same thing applies. Do you have an up-to-date driving record on file?”

Luke shrugged. “I’m not sure but I’m confident that you can check.”

“We are in the middle of digitizing paper records with the new system we just started using and I’m not going to go through several hundred folders just to find yours,” Fred replied flatly. “You either have it or you don’t.”

Luke frowned. “I’m assuming you organized the paper records in some fashion, like surnames in alphabetical order or maybe by department. Otherwise, it would be an absolute waste of time and company resources to have someone go through folders without even the slightest categorization because someone lost or left their certificate at home.”

Taking a deep breath, Fred abandoned his game and turned to Luke, his annoyance as clear as day now. I felt like I was watching a train wreck in slow motion.

“How we organize records here has nothing to do with you so if you don’t mind, let’s be done with this so I can get back to work,” Fred said.

Luke’s own expression was fast turning chilly. “I don’t ever recall playing online games being part of any job description in this company.”

God almighty but Fred just gave him a withering stare. “Are we done here?”

Luke crossed his arms over his chest. “Not quite. Look me up. We need a vehicle large enough to pick up supplies rather urgently.”

I was standing just off the side behind Luke and I reached out to put a hand on his lower back in an attempt to draw him away from this before it became an ugly termination scene. His stance instantly relaxed. He dropped his arms and reached one behind him to capture my hand and give it a reassuring squeeze.

“Fine,” Fred spat out, turning back to his computer and pulling up a system window. “What’s your name?”

“Luke Hedenby.”

Fred frowned as he started typing. “Luke Heden—you mean, like Luke Hedenby?” His face turned white in seconds as he swallowed hard and slowly turned his head back toward Luke. “L-like… Luke H-hedenby… CEO?”

Luke beamed and nodded. “Yeah, I’m that guy. I have no idea if Peggy ever put in a driving record file for me but I guess now’s the time to find out.”

Fred took off his glasses with a trembling hand and lowered them to the desk. Sweat dotted the line above his brows as he awkwardly gestured to the window behind him that looked into a vast garage that housed a mix of large industrial vehicles and some corporate cars. “Drive whichever one you wish to, sir.”

In ten minutes, we were driving out from under the parkade in a roomy SUV. Fred, with teeth practically chattering as he moved heaven and earth to get us a vehicle as fast as humanly possible, profusely apologized, with tears in his eyes, at Luke’s feet. 

I was silently impressed as Luke, with a straight face, told Fred to talk to his manager and to ‘Say you’re sorry like you really mean it’ and ‘Don’t be a dumbass and do it again’.

“Good advice,” I told him when we were on our way to the car. 

He smiled and shrugged. “It’s one I’m still learning and taking into heart this week. We’ll see how far it takes me.”

He didn’t bring it up once but in the afternoon we spent driving out of the city and picking up supplies, Luke’s apology was ringing clear. He drove without complaint at my less-than-masterful navigational skills. He got his hands dirty and helped load the boxes into the back of the car. We stopped by a drive-through to get ourselves some cold drinks and when we got back to work, he helped unload the boxes into a couple of dollies. Luke didn’t hesitate once to take one of the dollies and push it all the way up from the parkade to the marketing department. It was late in the afternoon and a lot of people were already gone for the day but the few who spotted us pushing dollies down the hall and in and out of elevators were quite bewildered by the sight. 

“Let’s just leave them here,” I told him as we parked the supplies at a corner across from my desk. There was no one else in the office but the two of us. “Andy’s bringing the wrapping supplies tomorrow and we’ll work on that. For now, we’re done.”

Luke accepted the cleaning wipes I handed him and glanced at his watch. “It’s ten-past six. Your shift’s way past over. I hope we’re paying you overtime for this.”

I smiled as I sat down at my desk to file some paperwork. “Oh, don’t worry, you are. You wouldn’t have to if this were better organized but I don’t make those calls so I’m not going to further expound on that.”

He plopped down on the corner of my table and picked up the paper crane that he most likely left there himself. “I’ll talk to Bryce about that but right now, I’m starving. Let’s grab something to eat.”

I paused. “We can’t.”

“We can if you just say yes,” he said, setting the crane back down. 

“I feel like if I did, I’ll be saying yes to more than just dinner,” I said, dropping what I was doing and slumping back in my chair. 

Guess there’s no better time than right now to just get this conversation over with.

“I’m not angry at you, Luke. I’m ticked off because the issue of Lola aside, no one should do that to a friend and I’d like to think that I am, at the very least, a friend to you,” I explained calmly. 

His piercing blue eyes boldly locked with mine. “You know you mean a hell lot more than that to me, Max.”

I bit my lip, fighting my accelerating heartbeat. 

So I’m more than just some friend. But what does that exactly make me?

“I’m sorry that I made you wait all night,” Luke continued gruffly. “I shouldn’t have said yes but when Lola called me up on our last day at Tokyo announcing she was heading back home as well and wondered  if she could hitch a ride, I didn’t think there was going to be a problem. But when we picked her up, she was already a drunken mess and I instantly remembered why we never had the healthiest relationship in the past.”

I opened my mouth to stop Luke because it actually stung a bit to listen to him talk about Lola and what was clearly a very colourful past he’d shared with her. But I didn’t say anything because the sting wasn’t completely a bad thing if it came with the truth. Just like a straight shot of strong vodka—it burned on its way down but it gave you a jolt of temporary courage.

“She had a screening in Tokyo for some small movie she was doing and she was depressed with all the crude reviews. She just wanted to get away from it all. I kept my mouth shut and told myself that maybe I could hold on to my sanity for twelve hours or so because I’d already said yes and to take back the favor would just worsen her condition.” Luke dragged a hand down his face before rubbing his scruffy jaw in agitation. “Then as we were waiting for our flight in the lounge, she climbed all over me, saying how much she missed me and all that crap. She said she could use a weekend with me to make her forget all her problems.”

I glanced away because I didn’t want what I was feeling to show on my face which felt like it was burning a bit. It was starting to feel more than just a little shot of vodka. It felt like I’d drunk the bottle dry.

“That’s when I decided to cut her off because I didn’t want any of that same sick shit again,” Luke said with a shake of his head. “And I’d already planned a perfect weekend that she was about to wreck. So I told her that it wasn’t a good idea for her to come with us. And that was when she lost it. She started ranting. She grabbed my phone because she wanted to talk to whichever girl I was screwing at the moment, claiming there was definitely one. Because I knew she wasn’t going to stop until she got what she wanted, I threw my phone down on the floor. To further spite me, she ground her shoe on it. Terrence, who was standing by and probably dialling security, wasn’t fast enough because she grabbed his phone and dunked it in a cup of coffee. Then she started throwing things around and security descended on us. Thank God we were in a private lounge or it would have been a PR-disaster. I had to take her back here or she’d get arrested there if I left her to her own devices in the state she was in. After we landed, Terrence broke a few traffic laws to come get you at work but you weren’t there anymore so we raced our way over to Peggy’s, hoping to drop me off and he could just drive Lola over to a hotel or something but when we got to the party, she wouldn’t let me go. She wanted to come inside but there was no way in hell I was going to let her come within a foot of you. Plus, she was going to ruin Peggy’s birthday and everyone else’s night. So we spent a good half an hour or so arguing outside until I finally told Terrence to go on in and I’d find a cab to get Lola far, far away. That’s when I saw you leave. But I couldn’t go after you then because I had to deal with Lola. I finally just got her into the car and dropped her off at a hotel myself. I called her manager on her cell and told him to come get her fast if he didn’t want to clean up the PR mess she was going to become without immediate intervention.”

“So it wasn’t exactly the sweet, dazzling reunion the tabloids called it,” I said with a smile that probably showed no humor and in a tone that was undeniably caustic. 

Luke’s expression was as grim as I felt. “No, it wasn’t. Lola and I had been off and on for a couple of years. It used to be convenient and very uncomplicated—we both knew what we wanted. She’s very attractive and some days she’s great. Other days, she’s toxic. Being with her was like slowly poisoning yourself.”

“So you only took small, occasional doses,” I scoffed. “Just a little vice you indulged in whenever the mood hit you.”

Luke sighed out loud. “I’m not a saint, Max. I’ve done stupid things. I still do them when I don’t know better. But I always do my best to be responsible about them by making sure they don’t invade the rest of my life.”

“Wouldn’t it just be easier to avoid doing stupid things altogether rather than try to contain the damaging consequences?” I asked bluntly.

A faint smile hovered on Luke’s mouth. “Now that I have a fairly good idea of what these damaging consequences entail, I’m probably going to have to stop being stupid very soon.”

Fighting the wild, fleeting flutter of my heart, I scowled at him. “I’m not talking about me, Luke. I’m talking about your life.”

His smile just got mysterious. “And the difference is?”

I couldn’t stand this feeling of teetering over the edge—terrified but oh, so tempted.

One push and it’s a long way down.

“Look, I don’t need the grand gestures, okay?” I said, rising from my seat as if that was somehow going to help me run. But my feet wouldn’t go anywhere. “The breakfast from Cleo’s, the cupcakes from Peggy, the lunch, the paper crane—“

“Don’t forget the free coffee from Cleo’s and the pizza and the drive home from Terrence,” he added.

I raised a brow and planted my hands on my hips. “You’re crazy but yes, all of those—I don’t need them. You don’t have to prove anything. Like this afternoon. You didn’t have to go out of your way for me. You already said you’re sorry. Good enough, I’m not pissed off at you anymore. There’s no need to turn our worlds upside down for a grand apology or dramatic proclamations—“

“So what do you want me to use as an excuse then, Max, since you seem better able to handle that than the truth?” Luke interjected in exasperation. “That I’m just a nice guy? Sure, I’m just being a nice guy but let’s be honest here, Max, I did it for you—all of it—even when you apparently have no need of it. Because I need you to know that I am so incredibly sorry for being the jackass that I was that night. I’m sorry that I hurt you. And I’m sure as hell sorry that I broke that trust you so rarely grant anybody. I don’t care what I have to do, Max, because contrary to your own estimation of yourself, you are worth every trouble I have to go through to get you back—world-turning, yours, mine and everyone else’s included.”

I could only stare at Luke for a moment because I had no words to say. 

Between the mad beating of my heart and the rush of blood to my ears, like I was free-falling headfirst, I couldn’t make a sound. 

He never tore his intense gaze away from me in the silence that ensued. 

I was close enough that I could reach out and touch his face but just like fire, I was scared of the burn even though I was drawn to the rich, comforting warmth.

Finally, some of his doubts showed through those fiery blue eyes. 

“Max? Please say something.”

“That was definitely a grand apology. And a dramatic proclamation.”

Luke smiled. “It was. You say you don’t need it but you have it anyway.”

“Thank you,” I added softly. “And I do accept your apology, Luke. I believe what you told me about what happened that night. And I can’t hold the consequences of your past decisions over your head. I’m not in a position to do that. We’re friends. Just like I expect you to be there when you say you will, I’m there the same way for you.”

He nodded and gazed down at the paper crane on my desk. “Peggy told me that the worst thing I can do is to take someone for granted. Because when you don’t think of them, you won’t even know that what you’re about to do can hurt them.”

“So what are you saying? You’re going to write my name on the back of your hand as a reminder?” I teased.

Luke rose to his feet and closed the distance between us, his hand finding mine and pressing it to his chest where I could feel the soft beating of his heart. “You’re crazy if you still don’t know where I keep you.”

I closed my eyes as he pressed a reverent kiss on my forehead. 

It felt like forever before we pulled away.

When he gazed down at me with smiling blue eyes, I grinned and sighed and shook my head.

This mad dance with Luke—one step forward and two steps back—I wasn’t sure how long we could keep doing it but the music hasn’t yet stopped.

So I guess we’ll keep dancing.

***

So? What do you think? It's a mad dance, alright. One that's about to get a little more complicated. I hope this chapter showed you another struggle between these two that had drawn them apart only to push them even closer. Things are starting to come to the surface but it doesn't mean it's happily ever after. You guys have seen my other stories. LOL!

Let me know what you think! I love reading the comments so keep them coming. And don't forget to vote if you liked it.

XOXO!

-Ninya

Love this song! So sultry and soulful!

 ♪♪♪ Chapter Soundtrack: Say You Love Me by Jessie Ware ♪♪♪

Say you love me to my face
I need it more than your embrace
Just say you want me, that's all it takes
Heart's getting torn from your mistakes

'Cause I don't wanna fall in love
If you don't wanna try,
But all that I've been thinking of
Is maybe that you might
Baby it looks as though we're running out of words to say
And love's floating away

Just say you love me, just for today
And don't give me time 'cause that's not the same
Want to feel burning flames when you say my name
Want to feel passion flow into my bones
Like blood through my veins

'Cause I don't wanna fall in love
If you don't wanna try,
But all that I've been thinking of
Is maybe that you might
And, baby, it looks as though we're running out of words to say
And love's floating away