Song: romantic/light academia playlist by crachead

"Hold still, please," I murmured. My son, LJ, stopped squirming in my lap at my quiet order. Taking a deep breath, I forced my hands to stop trembling and grasped the black comb. Working out the knots was easy once I got him to stay still. Small knots of his shaggy silver hair fell into the trash as I made silk out of untidy straw. "There, all done."

LJ turned to me with a goofy smile. One that reached his wide, startling blue eyes. It created lines at the edges of his eyes just like his father did when he genuinely smiled too. My heart stuttered at the little mocha skinned pup. The one that was mine but not mine at the same time.

"Thanks, Mommy."

Mommy.

This river, my Gods this river was far too cruel.

Forcing a smile, I watched as little LJ hopped off my lap and joined Leo by the stove. At Leo's stern order to stand back, our pup became upset, pouting at the slight rebuke. I stifled a laugh while watching Leo's broad back work diligently to make our breakfast. To appease our raging pup Leo let LJ make the chocolate smiley faces in the pancakes. He even let LJ flip the bacon in the popping oil.

Popping oil that burned Leo as he turned LJ away from the hazard. Shifting LJ so that he was more comfortable on his hip, Leo single handedly cooked the rest of the food. With our son's help he plated everything nicely.

Still dressed in his checkered pajamas, little LJ heaved himself onto the chair next to me. As if by habit, I reached over and cut his food up into bite sized pieces. LJ watched me hungrily as he munched on the sausage he stole from Leo's plate.

"Thanks, Mommy."

Mommy.

I smiled again, rustling his soft hair as he dug in. The boy was a sloppy eater. Syrup lined his lips and dribbled down his chin. He whined when his eggs touched his cold fruit. Regardless, he still ate it after Leo raised a single brow at him.

"Hey," Leo called. "You ok?"

Worry lined his older features as he reached over to rub my belly. A warmth like no other spread throughout me at his gentle touch and I felt a kick from within. Gasping at the new sensation, my gaze fell to my stomach where my unborn pup was kicking. She was strong. Her legs were pounding away where her fathers hand rested. It was unlike anything I'd ever felt before.

Nothing short of euphoria could describe this moment right here.

"Blue Eyes?"

Placing my hand next to his, tears lined my eyes as her kicking increased tenfold. "She's kicking," I whispered. My child was kicking.

"Oh, lemme feel!" Before I could protest LJ's sticky hands latched onto my stomach. His small palms pressed against my belly. In response his sister focused all her kicking in his general direction. The two pups bonded through my skin as I watched on with pure awe. The swelling in my heart made me want to stay in this moment forever.

I didn't want to leave.

"Hey, Marshmallow," LJ giggled. His sticky fingers spread the syrup all over my white dress as he dragged his hands everywhere. It was like a game they played all on their own. Wherever LJ's hands went my baby girl's powerful kicking would follow.

"LJ, how many times do I have to tell you that you're not naming your sister, Marshmallow?" Leo fed me blueberries and chunks of pineapple as our pups played. LJ huffed at his father, never taking his gaze off the rippling of my skin. Leo poked my cheek, raising a brow at me teasingly. "This is what happens when you tell our son he gets to name the next baby."

"Marshmallow is a good name!"

"It is not!" Leo flicked our son's forehead, quietly scolding him for dirtying my dress. "Naming kids after food is out of the question."

"Then what about those people that name their pups Cherry or Apple?"

Without missing a beat Leo bounced a blueberry off LJ's face saying, "Those parents are stupid. Cherry, Apple, and Plum." Leo rolled his eyes. "Are they having a baby or planting a freaking orchard?"

LJ giggled at Leo's pinched expression. I caressed my son's hair as he laughed the most loveliest of laughs. His sweet song was like ambrosia to my yearning heart. I loved hearing every bit of it.

I never wanted to go a day without hearing it.

Ever.

"Mommy, you like Marshmallow, right?" I adored the hope lighting up his already bright eyes. The fluttering of his long dark lashes reminded me of butterfly wings. Soft and gentle to gaze upon.

I stroked his plump cheek and replied, "I do. Marshmallow is a cute name."

Liar.

I shuddered at the feeling of Leo's voice whispering in my mind for the first time. My toes curled from the tingling sensation. The connection between us was palpable and I never felt more in tune with him than right now. I blushed at the sight of his falling smirk when he caught wind of the effect his voice had on me.

Nice to see things aren't
getting stale between us.

I'm literally pregnant with
our second child right now.

Stale isn't even in our vocabulary.

"Anyways," Leo chuckled. "You're gonna have to come up with something better, buddy. I don't think I can angrily yell Marshmallow Ava Brightdoom when she's in trouble."

Fair enough.

LJ's forehead creased as he tapped his fingers over my stomach. His sister's little feet followed his every move, dancing alongside his tapping's. Gasping, LJ shouted with glee, "Purple!"

Your son-

Our son.

-comes up with
the worst names.

I think it's cute.

You thought it was "cute"
when he came up with
the name Sniffkins.

Now, we have a cat
named Sniffkins.

Fucking Sniffkins!

As if on cue, a black cat hopped onto the wooden table. Stretching out, the fluffy feline let out a pleased yowl before bouncing her way towards us.

"Morning, Sniffkins!" LJ's hands left my belly and he fed Sniffkins pieces of dry pancake. The fat cat ate gently, careful not to scratch him with her sharp teeth. When she had her fill the chubby little fur ball hopped onto my lap, purring loudly as she kneaded my stomach. My daughters kicking ceased as Sniffkins prodded at me. I rubbed the kitties forehead, a sensation of relief that wasn't my own flooding my entire body.

My daughter loved this. She enjoyed Sniffkins and her attention. I could feel it in my gut. Maybe this was what mother's intuition felt like.

I loved this feeling.

I wanted to hold onto it forever and never let it go.

Looking into Sniffkins violet tinted eyes, I knew then what we would name our second child. "I like the name, Purple. But, I was thinking that maybe we could just use another name that still means purple?"

"Like what?" Leo asked.

"Violet."

Violet Ava Brightdoom.

It was perfect. Just like this moment of pure domestic bliss was. Perfect.

How I adored that word...

"I like it," LJ said happily. The sticky pup licked up the rest of his food. His syrupy smile pierced my warm heart and I chuckled at his messy state. Tucking a lock of his wavy hair behind his ear, I leaned forward to press a kiss to his temple. Sniffkins protested with a small meow but never stopped kneading my pregnant stomach.

There was something peculiar gnawing at the back of my mind. However, the longer I watched my son be a goof the further that thing was pushed away. Whatever it was became quickly forgotten as I rolled my eyes at Leo's bedroom gaze. Sniffkins and her lovely purring chased away all thoughts not surrounding this moment.

This was paradise and I was content with remaining in it for as long as I could.

"Go get cleaned up," Leo told LJ. LJ whined, playing with his syrup stained fingers and making faces out of scraps of pancakes. "I don't wanna hear it."

"But-"

"No but's." I polished off the rest of my plate as Leo policed our son like a well educated parent. Seeing him act so stern yet still speak kindly reminded me of something. Something that had to do with Sky and Flora, wasted money or dented cars. I wasn't sure because the memory was foggy. But I was certain there was something from my past that was similar to the way Leo acted in this moment. "If you don't get cleaned up then you can't see your cousins."

Quicker than I could blink, LJ was racing up the stairs with a chubby Sniffkins racing after him. Her fluffy black tail disappeared around the wall leaving Leo and I alone. Butterflies grew in my stomach. For some reason, my heart jumped to my throat when his warm gaze met mine and he leaned down for a kiss.

His lips captured mine gently at first. It was sweet, almost like the kiss one would give a lover after waking up. But as the sun warmed the kitchen through the open window, his lips moved faster against my own. A fire like no other burned in my core at the way he nibbled on my bottom lip.

Leo's kiss felt like home. It felt like we'd done this thousands of times while also feeling like this was the first time. My head swirled with confusion at this realization and Leo pulled away. Resting his forehead against mine, Leo tilted my chin up so he could stare into my eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," I replied curtly. It wasn't a lie. Not entirely. Something was wrong but I didn't exactly know what it was that was wrong. There was simply something wrong.

But I couldn't explain what it was.

"Blue Eyes, you can't lie to me." Leo grinned, trailing an intoxicating finger over my cheek. "What is it? Let me help you."

I sighed, leaning into the warm hand that was cupping my cheek. "I don't know," I whispered. "Something feels wrong but I can't place what it is. I just, I feel like there's something not right."

"Something not right?" Hurt overcame his expression. A touch of confusion lingered beneath his cocoa brown eyes. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No! It's not that," I promised. "It really isn't that. It's not you."

It was me.

There was something wrong with me.

My mind told me it had to do with how I woke up but I didn't know why. I had a weird nightmare, I was a little disoriented, and then I was with my family. LJ was being a pain with Leo as usual. Little Violet was active like she always was in the morning. Leo cooked breakfast like he always did and Sniffkins did whatever the hell she wanted to do. Everything fell in place the way it did yesterday, the day before that, and every other day since Leo and I married.

Since Leo and I married...

The gnawing confusion turned into a fervent frenzy. It was like rose thorns the way they pricked away at the warring emotions within me. The taste of fresh fruit on my tongue turned bitter. That perfect, euphoric, blissful feeling was now sickly.

"Blue Eyes? Come on baby, you're scaring me."

Baby? I hated pet names like baby. Surely Leo should know that by now, right?

I mean, we're married.

Leo and I.

We're married.

We have a son named LJ with another pup on the way. We have a fat cat cursed with the name Sniffkins. We live in the same house I grew up in just like my ancestors that came before me did. Leo and I have a life together. One that we made after, after...

After what?

Nausea overwhelmed me but I forced myself to swallow the rising bile. The fuzzy feeling within my head grew stronger. I could've sworn that there was another voice in my head that was screaming.

It was a man.

"Blue Eyes?" Leo gripped my face tightly, forcing me to meet his warring gaze. All signs of laughter and mirth were gone. Only conflict remained where love and adoration lived only moments ago. "Alright, I'm gonna mind link Tallulah so she can come check you out-"

"Who?"

"Tallulah," Leo said slowly. His petal-like lips frowned as he felt my forehead and then my cheeks. "Y'know, Pride's Mate? One of our Gamma's? Our personal Healer and your friend?"

Leo chuckled but it didn't reach me. The gurgling man's shouting in my head became stronger. It was my name that he was calling out for. Just my name and nothing more.

I knew that voice.

Leo's eyes glazed over and I knew he was mind linking her. No, not her. Tallulah.

For some reason the name Tallulah reminded me of sunflowers and freshwater rivers. Tallulah sounded like flower crowns and ethereal sunlight passing through leaves. Tallulah was like a lively garden or happy trees swaying in the wind.

But, that couldn't be right. All of those things were alive and Tallulah, Tallulah...

Tallulah wasn't alive.

Tallulah wasn't a part of my Pack and she definitely wasn't my friend. Tallulah was Pride's Mate but she wasn't here. She wasn't here.

Venus!

I tried to conjure up an image of Tallulah's face but found no memories. I couldn't hear her voice or remember the little things about her. Nor could I find any recollection of her with Pride.

Venus!

Tallulah was a blank face. A mannequin in the store. Naked with no characteristics or features to distinguish her as anything but lifeless.

Venus!

Tallulah wasn't alive.

I didn't know how I knew that. But I knew it to be true.

Something was wrong here because Tallulah wasn't alive.

"Alright, I don't like this," Leo said. "Ava's on her way. She said she got confused like this when she had pups too. Maybe she'll be able to help until Tallulah gets here."

Venus!

Come on, Venus.

Breathe!

I lurched forward, gasping on the closing of my throat. My chest ached and I whimpered at the harsh force pushing into my sternum. There was something invisible rising up my throat, taking away the air I needed to breathe.

"Blue Eyes!" Leo gripped my shoulders but I pushed his hands away. I was suffocating in these lies and this voice and this feeling trying to drown me. "Blue Eyes, please-"

"Tallulah's dead," I choked out. "So is Ava."

Ava wasn't alive.

She couldn't have been.

Something, pictures or art, told me so. Images of smudged colors and written emotions filled my mind like a winter storm. Each new flurry brought with it another page of darkness from somewhere. From something.

Somewhere that wasn't here. Something that wasn't this thing.

If we tell her she's dead and break her reality, she could get deadly.

Pride.

If we tell her she's dead and break her reality, she could get deadly.

Come on!

Breathe, Venus!

Breathe!

I threw up but nothing came up. Saliva dripped from my gaping mouth while the pushing against my chest intensified.

If we tell her she's dead and break her reality, she could get deadly.

Break her reality.

Her reality.

Reality.

This wasn't my reality.

"Mommy?" My heart wailed at the scared tone of LJ's voice. "Mommy?"

Mommy.

"Mommy's fine," Leo said soothingly. "Go to your room. Now, LJ. Go."

Somehow, I knew that this would be the last time I saw him. This would be the last time so I glanced up and watched his silver head vanish. He took pieces of my heart when he left. Violet kicked and I knew that wasn't real too.

I knew none of this was real.

Truth One: Tallulah was dead. Pride had no living Mate. She was not my friend.

Truth Two: Ava was dead. She was sick and now she was gone. I never even met her.

Truth Three: LJ wasn't real.

Truth Four: Violet wasn't real either.

Truth Five: I wasn't pregnant.

Truth Six: I wasn't married to Leo.

Truth Seven: This wasn't my reality because none of it was real.

That's it, Venus!

Come on!

Breathe!

"You're not real," I whimpered. Tears dripped down my cheeks. I refused to meet fake Leo's eyes. "None of this is real. None of it."

A choked sob fell from my lips and then I was sinking. I fell out of fake Leo's arms and into the floorboards of melted chocolate and cold liquid. Time there was spent languidly but just like things tend to do, it eventually came to an end.

Water gushed from my mouth. The beating on my chest stopped its forceful pounding. A cold hand held the back of my neck, pushing me to the side so I could spit out the rest of the water.

"There you go," Pride murmured. "Get it all out."

I vomited chunks of our rushed breakfast mixed with the river's water. The sour taste in my mouth was reality. Gone now were the sweetness of fruits and warm pancakes.

When I opened my eyes Thunder Forest was flickering in shades of black night and white deceit. There were still no sun, moon, or stars. But with each flicker of black came another booming of thunder. Blue streaked across the sky every few seconds. I tried to tether myself to this moment.

I saw it then. Through the shifting of colored backgrounds and Pride's wet hands, there was a man watching us. A man with a long red braid hanging over his shoulder. Eyes as bright as emeralds and skin paler than the moon.

I knew that face.

I knew he once smelled of nutmeg.

I knew he was Fergus Pridesong.

What I didn't know was why Fergus Pridesong just hurled a string of hot lightning in my direction.

My body shivered. The gift within me was slow to react and I knew there would be no barrier of protection coming to shield us. I watched through paralyzed eyes as Pride's chest sparked blue. He pushed me to the ground before the magick could even touch me and intercepted the blow.

"Pride!"

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QOTD: What test do you think Venus was forced to face? All six characters were tested on the same thing. Using what you know about them, what do you think the others had to face? Why do you think Fergus attacked?