Controlled Chaos

 Harry was in a contemplative state when he walked toward the carriages, instinctively following the rest of the 6th years.

He was slowed by the chattering herds of excited Hogwarts students. He hadn't bothered to ask whether he was going on the boats with the first years, or in the carriages with the other 6th years, for he was to be sorted with the first years anyhow, but he didn't let this particular problem get to him. He had other things on his mind.

And for the first time in his life, the only person Harry really truly wanted to speak with was Severus Snape. A rational, cold, calculating voice that told him exactly how things were.

Harry zoomed through the possibilities in his mind:

How had she known? It is impossible, with the amount of security measures Remus, Severus, and Dumbledore had taken to ensure that his identity was kept a complete secret.

Had he slipped up somewhere? Or was it some unknown branch of magic she was using?

The only interaction with Luna he had had when he had been Harry, the boy-who-lived, star quidditch player, a Gryffindor who's dad was James Potter. Had she known all along?


"Even the ones closest might betray your trust." Severus had lectured, and Remus' sad and wistful eyes whenever he stared at him proved that particular point.


And yet, Luna, with her whimsical sayings and untamed quality emitted such a trusting aura, such innocence. But no- Harry thought- she isn't innocent or naive, that's just how we see her-- Her and her nargles and blibbering humdingers.


We're the ones that don't understand.


Luna, Harry realized, was the perfect enigma. She is everything Severus had told Harry to be in all of his drills and lessons over the summer. Nobody took her ramblings seriously, nobody knew where her loyalties lie. While she had friends and was part of the DA, nobody knew her very well, very seriously.

In fact, nobody takes her seriously at all, Harry thought. He could relate to that one-- with the whole 'Heir of Slytherin' incident, hearing voices, seeing the thestrals. 



Luna would definitely be somebody to watch, Harry decided. But to avoid? He isn't sure.



"Firs' years! Firs' years!" a loud bellow broke through the chattering crowd and through Harry's pondering thoughts.

Harry, with a affectionate grin, turned to see Hagrid, in his brown leather coat, beetle black eyes merry. Harry hadn't realized just how much Hagrid enjoyed his job, but as the first years streamed around him like lost puppies, Hagrid seemed to transform into a doting father seeing off his kids.


"Over here! FIRS' YEARS!"

Harry hesitated, before approaching him. Just act like the lost, confused transfer student you are, Harry thought sardonically, got that act down pretty good.

"Excuse me sir," he yelled up at Hagrid, who was still waving vigorously at a couple stragglers in the distance (and creating quite a lot of wind with that wave)

"Yes?" Hagrid boomed, finally looking down at him with curiosity. It was definitely strange to see Hagrid greet him with anything but an ear splitting smile.

"I'm- I'm Seraphinus Snape, a transfer student," Harry explained hurriedly, jogging alongside Hagrid who was guiding the first years toward the boats.

"So yer Pr'fessor Snape's son?" Hagrid grinned down at him, "Names Rubeus Hagrid. Yer in the right place."

Hagrid then, after cajoling the last of the first years into the small, cramped wooden boats, lifted Harry by the scruff of his neck and plopped him into a boat containing only a young boy and girl.

"You're not a first year." a sallow, thin girl standing next to him pointed out in a reedy tone. She barely came up to his shoulder, Harry thought in wonderment. Were he and Ron and Hermione ever this small?

"No, I'm not." Harry replied, feeling rather out of his element surrounded by so many younger peers, "I'm a transfer student. 6th year. I'm to be sorted as well."

"Really? I didn't know you could do that." chimed in the boy imperiously. He had brown hair parted down the middle and a uniform that was the slightest bit too big for him.

"Well, you can," Harry said bluntly, and deciding that it was best to change the subject in the midst of such skeptics and asked, "What house do you think you'll be in?"

"Ravenclaw, of course," the girl said primly, holding her oar with precision, eyes glimmering, "my mother was in Ravenclaw too. And my dad."

The boy scoffed. "Who wants to read books all day? I'm gonna be in Gryffindor, the best house!"

Harry resisted the urge to correct the young boy, knowing the amount of homework that went into Potions alone for EVERY house, and instead focused on the vision of the familiar castle they were nearing, lights golden like they were part of the night sky.

He remembered nostalgically this very moment at age 11, and just how magical this moment had been. Away from the Dursleys, with new friends, and a new life. 

After crawling haphazardly out of the small boat with the first years, oohing and aahing over the castle's grandeur and welcoming lights, the huge, magnificent doors opened to reveal Professor McGonagall, looking at the first years much like she had when Harry was one.

Harry, half listening to McGonagall's lecture, looked around at the familiar corridors, mirroring the first years who weren't truly listening.

"Seraphinus Snape?" McGonagall called out, eyes fixed on him, easily able to pick him out over the heads of the first years.

"Yes, Professor?" Harry answered back, ignoring the whispers of the first years who probably had older siblings who complain about Professor Snape.

"You will be sorted last, after all of the first years." she announced cordially, eyes softening slightly as she looked at him. Harry wondered if she saw or noticed the resemblance to Lily, but couldn't be sure. He wondered what she thought when she heard that Snape had a son.



"They will see what they want to see," Remus had said when Harry had voiced this concern, "Like how the world saw you as a sign of hope when you were Harry Potter."

A hero.

Will they see me as a villain now with Severus as my father?



"Behind me in single file!" McGonagall commanded, the first years rushing in front of Harry and bobbing into crooked lines, whispering nervously to each other.

And with that, the grand wooden doors slowly creaked open. 

Damn, he had forgotten how scary it was to have an entire school be staring at you, but that fear returned tenfold. He could hear the confused whispers and pointed glances his way, and regretted going last. He could see Ron and Hermione sitting with Neville, Dean, and Seamus, Ron complaining loudly of how long the sorting takes.



What are they going to think of me?

Just breathe.



"Arwell, Lucy!" McGonagall called out.

It was the girl from the boat, Harry realized, pale faced and determinedly strolling up to the hat in a very Hermione-like fashion.

"HUFFLEPUFF!" the hat cried out after a moments contemplation. The girl looked shocked.

"Anton, Reese!" McGonagall called out, after the loud cheers of the Hufflepuff house had subsided.

After a few more sortings, Harry stopped paying attention, instead running through the debate he was sure to have with the sorting hat.



"Anything but Gryffindor." Severus had affirmed.

"Is that just because you hate us?" Harry had replied amusedly.

"We don't want a replacement Harry Potter, now do we?" Severus inquired, eyebrows raised, "That would be too suspicious."



The line of first years was was dwindling. Harry couldn't help but tapping his foot impatiently, and nervously.

First year he had argued 'anything but Slytherin', and this year he was to argue 'anything but Gryffindor'. Harry had neglected to tell Severus that he was almost sorted into Slytherin, mostly because he didn't want him to go into shock, but also because he was wary of this tidbit of information.

Was it truly him? Or was it the piece of Voldemort inside of him? Was it simply remnants of a tragic Halloween night?

"And now," McGonagall called out, silencing the chatter following the sorting, "Please welcome Seraphinus Snape, a 6th year transfer student from the American School of Magic. Please make him feel at home."

The hall exploded into whispers, which Harry tried not to listen to. Steeling himself, he walked soundly up to the hat, feeling considerably taller than the small stool, and placed it atop his head.

I belong here.


"Ah, what do we have here..." the hat was intrigued, "Not a Potter this time, are we? No, no indeed."

Harry felt rather stung at this tiny little voice telling him what he already knew. I'm still the same person, I just look a bit different.

"Of course, of course, the same soul, the same personality-- but same person?" the hat added amusedly, "You have changed quite a bit over the years, young Harry. With your experiences."

Harry felt even more defensive at this. This brought up thoughts of Cedric, Sirius, and the Chamber of Secrets and he didn't want to confront that. He pushed the thoughts away, knowing that the blasted hat was probably picking through his private memories.

"Interesting, interesting." Harry had the uncomfortable feeling that his mind was being sifted through.

I can't be in Gryffindor, you understand that, right?  Harry pleaded with the hat, I just can't.

"Tsk, tsk, Mr. Snape. I won't let you sway my final judgement so easily." the hat laughed, very close to his right ear, "But you need not worry, you are a Gryffindor no longer."

Harry felt relieved at that.

"You don't want to be noticed, do you," the hat stated. Harry didn't answer.

"You aren't proud anymore, are you?" the hat pressed, tiny voice seeming to know something that he didn't.

"What d'you mean not proud?" Harry thought. This hat always ended up being an absolutely infuriating plethora of riddles.

That hat chuckled. Harry resisted the urge to rip it off of his head.

"Definitely not a Ravenclaw then." the hat proclaimed, still chuckling.

"Oi," Harry muttered aloud, and then in his head, "Are you trying to insult my intelligence?"

"Oooh, that just proves it to me." the hat cried out joyfully in his head, "You're no inquiring mind- You want control, don't you Snape? You want to be right. YOU think that you're right."

"What does that have to do with anything-" Harry started furiously.

"Yes, yes, true ambition, true motives. You aren't bound any longer by your insecurities- no you want to fix the world you are in for your own."

Harry blanched at this.

"You're making me sound like Voldemort! I'm doing this for the greater good-" he cried out in his head, hoping that the hat was still listening.



"Good luck, Seraphinus Snape.", the hat whispered in his ear before crying out for the hall to hear, "better be a SLYTHERIN!"

After a moments silence, the Slytherin house burst into a spattering applause. Harry stood up quickly, feeling a bit lightheaded, and handed the hat to McGonagall. His former  Head of House smiled at him politely, needlessly pointing out the Slytherin house to him. He would miss her. 


At least he had Severus.



The hall had exploded into conversation, and there were more than a few scathing glares being cast his way. Harry ignored them, and opted to sit near the end of the table near the teachers, a little ways away from the other people. Malfoy was glancing down the table at him, he noticed as he glanced to his left, the expression on his face indeterminable.

Harry looked away quickly, gulping. I'm definitely staying away from him, if I can manage it, he swore to himself.

He opted to look up at the teachers table instead. Severus caught his eye, expression closed off (an expression which Harry knew he practiced in his work as a spy), but a moment later he raised his glass at him. Harry smiled weakly in reply, and turned his attention back to the problems at hand.



Time to enter the snake den.

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