Calum's PoV

"I'm sorry, I just need to get some air." I whispered after Poppy had explained everything to me. We'd sat in the front room with the cakes and coffee she had prepared and she just let it all out. Every emotion, every fact, every reason. I saw it so clearly now. Yeah, she didn't go about it the best way but who would have? Hindsight always makes us look back and wonder how something would have gone if we'd done it differently. What would I have done? Probably just had a meltdown. No one had the right answer. That being said, it hadn't felt happy at all. Yes, I forgave her and understood her but the bad feeling overshadowed the good ones. That damned cancer was back. I trusted her instincts, her nursing background and her symptom evaluation. I didn't need to wait for Sam to tell us otherwise. I'd just said it to buy us some time. We needed some time together to be happy again. She was nearing the end of the pregnancy, she was radiant and ready to become a mum. I'd seen her with kids during shows and it blew me away, she was always so patient with them and so understanding. I wanted to go back to those things I'd so missed doing whilst we were apart - the cuddling, the budget movies, the laughter. Would that even come naturally now, with the weight of this diagnosis coming back into our lives? What if it was worse this time? Or it had spread? What if she was hospitalised or they had to bring the baby out early? What if I lost her, or both of them? The sick feeling rose too quickly and I rushed out of the building, hiding myself in the corner of the shadowed alleyway as I retched and panicked and spiralled out of control away from Poppy's eyes. I couldn't handle this again. I was barely strong the first time.

"Cal?" Ashton's voice was something I longed for but also dreaded. I didn't want him to see me in this state either. "God, there you are! We were worried-" He took one look at me and stopped talking straight away, pulling me in for a hug I didn't know I needed. My knees buckled as I fell into his body, sobbing heavily from the depths of my chest. We needed to catch a break. We needed some good in our lives. "Hey, it's okay." He soothed.

"I can't handle it. Not again. I wasn't even with her through half of it last time and this time she has our baby in there. Our baby who is due in a few months." I pulled away from him as I tried to muster some strength. I wiped furiously at my face with my sleeve and huffed to myself. Where the hell was I going with this? Was this going to help us at all?

"Look, I know this fucking sucks but I also know both of you. You're two of the strongest people I know. You've gone through shit other people could only read about in fiction but you've made it out of that. You can make it through this too." As always, his perfect words made me feel like we were dealing with something so easy to fix. He gave me an unrivalled confidence. "So we're both gonna go back up there and we're going to support her through everything. Got that?" I nodded, sure of myself for the first time today. We rushed back to Poppy with a newfound energy and sat with her as she cupped her mug, deep in thought as she watched the liquid slosh in circles whilst she moved it.

"I'll leave you two to talk. Love you Pops, see you soon." He spoke quickly as he slammed the door shut, leaving me alone with Poppy for the first time. I smiled to myself as I realised he'd been cunning as a fox and set this whole thing up whilst he was talking to me. I admired him for so many reasons.

"Ha." I laughed out loud at my thoughts. Mental reminder to get Ashton for this later today. "Sorry, he must have planned that. You know what he's like." Poppy let out a small smile as she reminisced on the times Ash had helped us in his own way.

"He does have a way with words." She said softly, sipping her drink not long after. Was that because of the pain? Was she trying to mask it in front of me?

"Look, I just wanted to say sorry too. I know it's not going to feel like much now, but I honestly didn't mean to mess up with your family. I was just curious, and i thought if I looked at Will's stuff, I'd understand more about the past you keep so locked up. Instead I fucked it up and for that I'm truly sorry. I'm never going against your word again. If you want to tell me, I'll be happy to hear it but if you don't, that's fine too." I sipped my coffee now, feeling like my throat was tugging slightly too. For a moment we sat in an almost comfortable silence.

"I'd like you back here if you want to." Poppy said, her eye line not moving. She paused for a second before she stood up, shuffling over to the island in the open plan kitchen where she rested her mug on the counter. "I understand if you can't, I know I ruined everything with how I acted." I didn't even let her finish before I'd rushed to her, spinning her round to look at me as I cupped her face in my hands for the first time in what felt like forever. My fingers tingled as I touched her skin, relishing every part of her. No one was perfect in that airbrushed model in a photo shoot way, but she was perfect to me. Our eyes connected with a vulnerability that we hadn't seen for a long time and, whilst words escaped me, I wanted to show her that I was with her the whole way. I softly placed my lips on hers, leaving her with a delicate kiss. When I pulled away, she was smiling and pulled me straight back towards her for another kiss.